Yu-Gi-Oh does not belong to me; they are the creations of Kazuki Takahashi.

Summary: Have an insight into Kisara's last few days on earth and all the things she thought but never said. She's not the perfect girl everyone makes her out to be, there's a reason for her sacrifice.

Told in Kisara's POV.

"…" someone else is talking

'…' Kisara is talking, otherwise she's just thinking. After all, it's in her perspective.

I italicized lines from the story that I will explain the reason for at the end of the story. If there's anything else you want me to italicize (doesn't have to be so I'll explain it, but that's ok too), please tell me so in a review and I'll edit the chapter and chapters to come. If there's anything inaccurate, please tell me so I'll rewrite that part.

Behind Blue Eyes

I am cold, tired, hurt, and dying. Cold in the blazing heat of Egypt, tired of walking through endless towns and cities, hurt from treading through miles of blistering sand and crawling through hellish sandstorms, and dying from thirst, starvation, and the wounds delivered to me.

Is it such a violation of people's security to be different? To have pale skin, light hair, and blue eyes? Or was it something other than my appearance? Villagers always said that I'd bring destruction upon them[1]. But what is that supposed to mean? I can't even defend myself, let alone hurting others.

But what can I do? The gods don't take pity on me, I've tried. There is no one willing to protect me; they all run away in fear. Do they see something I don't? Do they see a monster when they look at me?[2]

Finally, a city. Wait. How is that good? The people there will not act any differently than the people of the cities I went to before.  No one helps me, yet I've done nothing against them. Then again, I've also done nothing for them…[3]Was that the reason no one helped me? Because I've done nothing for them? Perhaps. Perhaps I should offer my services to a household or a shop keeper. Perhaps then they will help me.

But of what service could I be to anyone? At this current condition I am too weak to do any manual labor. My voice! Although my throat is parched, if they will feed me and give me water to drink, then I will gladly sing for them. Where to go now?

I feel like an unfaithful wife walking out of her home. People glare at me as I pass. They obviously see my apparent misery but no one offers a hand. Why? Are people afraid of me? Or afraid of themselves? If one person has pity for me, is it that they don't help me because they are afraid of the reaction of their villagers? Will they be mocked if they show compassion to me? [4]

They turn away from me in disgust as I walk past them.  I don't see reason not to. My head is hung down low with shame and disgrace. My appearance isn't a beautiful sight to behold. It is filthy, dirty, and disgusting. I am no one. I am it.[5]

It doesn't matter to them. I spot a drinking house, it isn't that noisy, perhaps they don't have an entertainer. I walk in and the moment I do, everyone turns around to stare at me.  Instantly their curious faces turn into a mask of scorn and repulsion. The tension in the air is so thick, I can hardly breathe. Or maybe that's from my weakening lungs.  They're probably shriveling up from lack of moisture.

"What do you want demon?"

Where did that voice come from? I'm about to die, I can't think right now.  Sleep…Food…Water…

'Ahh!'

Arms grabbed me from behind, shocking me out of my thoughts.  They are strong, much more than I am.

'No! Stop! What are you doing?! Let go of me! I only wanted water!'

I yell, but it is barely above a whisper.  They don't listen.  They're dragging me towards the town square.

'Anyone! Help me! I'll do anything!' I manage to shout to passersby. But they heed me not. My eyes land upon a shadowy figure lurking near the buildings, and I know he's looking at me too.  I'm pleading to him with my mind, my voice isn't working.

Help me sir, I'll do anything if you save me. A life saved is a life earned.

But he smirks at me. He thinks he'll never be in this same position. He thinks I'm weak.  For some reason, my anger flares. He seems astonished, but otherwise continues on his way. I'll make him regret that decision… [6] In one life, or the next.

I feel lightheaded, and it seems my body is glowing.  The villagers are truly afraid.

They berate my esteem with cruel words. "Go away! Leave our city in peace! We've done nothing to you, freak!" They pound against my body with sharp, jagged rocks. They care not where it is hurled. Gashes cut my worn down dress and beaten skin. I scream in pain, but no one listens. Visions of complete light explode in my head but I don't care.  I'm too weak to care at the moment.

"Water? You want water? Here!" an old woman dumps a bucket full of dirty dishwater onto me, shocking me out of my unconscious. Laughter commences. Mockery ensues. This world is a cold place for those different.

I beg them to stop again. 'Please! Stop!' but that's all I can sputter out. There are footsteps running towards me. I turn my head. I'd at least like to see who my tormentors are. A priest? Guards? Am I in that deep trouble? This is too much. I sink into nothingness—hold on; did someone just tell them to stop…?

End of Chapter 1.

[1] Or was it something other than my appearance? Villagers always said that I'd bring destruction upon them.

Here Kisara starts thinking the reason why people are afraid of her and call her a disaster is because of something outside of her appearance.

[2] Do they see a monster when they look at me?

She wonders what people see when they look at her that she doesn't see.

[3] Then again, I've also done nothing for them…

She's looking for an explanation of why people aren't helping her. She is trying to convince herself that there's nothing wrong with her.

[4] Or afraid of themselves? If one person has pity for me, is it that they don't help me because they are afraid of the reaction of their villagers? Will they be mocked if they show compassion to me?

She's trying to see it from their point of view, but partially accepting that she's different.

[5] It is filthy, dirty, and disgusting. I am no one. I am it.

Here, Kisara has fully accepted that she's different and considers herself nothing.

[6] I'll make him regret that decision

Even though she has a very low self esteem, she knew that man saw her pain and he laughed at her. He laughed at her position even though he was hiding in the shadows, so she got really angry.