Something of a sequel to "The Birds and the Bees". I got a review for it, got this idea, and well, I just couldn't resist. You might want to look at that, but I'm pretty sure it isn't necessary. Thanks, Elaienar!
Why do I always get into these situations? Iroh thought miserably as he stared at five-year-old Azula. Her brother had been the exact same age when he had asked that awkward question. Perhaps there was a more prominent sibling resemblance than he'd thought.
Azula was currently looking at him with her bottom lip stuck out. She could look ominously cute when she wanted to. Frankly, Iroh was scared. A curious Azula was not a good thing, especially when she'd just asked that question. Remembering the way Zuko's conversation had come out, Iroh was positively panicking.
"Why do you ask, my dear?" Iroh asked, smiling benignly. Azula smiled, now looking nice. Already, though, Iroh knew not to trust her. Even at this age, that was the expression she gave before she jumped and burned a cricket-moth to dust. She tilted her head, still smiling eerily, and said, "No one would tell me! I asked Mai and Ty Lee, but they didn't know. And Daddy won't answer, and I can't find Zuko."
Lucky people. Iroh sighed, and then was hit with a stroke of brilliance. "Azula! You know I can't tell you if your darling father does not want me to!"
Azula pouted, and Iroh caught a dangerous glint in her eye. "Please, Uncle Iroh? I might just have to track down Zuko later and get it out of him if you won't tell me!" Her face was the picture of innocence. She certainly knew how to press his buttons.
Iroh frowned, then decided there was no reason to be gloomy, and smiled. "Alright, Azula, you got me. I'll tell you. A mommy and daddy sleep together, and the daddy puts the baby in the mommy's stomach." He wasn't foolish enough to use the same explanation twice, although he doubted Azula would raise the same objection Zuko had.
Azula's face was a mask of puzzlement. Iroh had managed to give her a subject she didn't understand. "But where does he get the baby?" She asked. Iroh sighed again. Of course it couldn't be easy. "Umm..." He thought of Ursa, which made him think of gardens. Of course! Seeds!
"The Daddy has seeds, seeds which grow into babies, and he plants one in the mommy."
Azula grinned, and walked off. "Thank you, Uncle Iroh!" Iroh was much relieved. That had gone much better than he'd expected.
Later the day, scrawled in writing that, although messy, still looked much more controlled than a five year old could pen, was a note on Iroh's pillow.
You need to work on your explanation skills. Daddy is much more concise.
-Azula
The blood drained from Iroh's face.
Ha ha, that was so fun. Sorry for shortness!