I woke up to the sound of buzzing, at first I reached for my phone hoping to silence the caller who was waking me, but it wasn't my phone, it was a vacuum humming in the somewhat silent loft. I looked at the clock and realized it was past noon, Schmidt and Winston were at work, so who was vacuuming this god damn early..?
I forgot all about this debacle as I recalled the events of what happened late last night before I closed the door to my bedroom.
I can't believe I did that, what had gotten into me?! I had never had such guts, and there I go deciding on my own that this was the way to prove my manhood. That I'm not a 'fluffer', I'm a man.
I slipped out of my bed... wait this wasn't my bed, since when did my sheets have pink and blue birds all over them, maybe Jess had taken it upon herself to tidy up my room? But wait, as I looked up I was in fact in Jess's bedroom.
Oh my god.
Was I that drunk that I had.. sex .. with Jessica Day- and didn't remember it? No way, Doctor Sam was in this bed last night, not me!
I looked around and couldn't deny where I was, but had no memory of ever entering a room other than mine. But as I went to itch my head in frustration and confusion I wasn't met with my usual messy frock, I was met with long soft curls.
I rushed over to Jessica's mirror and almost threw up, this was the most drunk fucked up Jess dream I have ever had, I thought.
Like I said sleeping Nick is a totally different guy, and he usually dreams about dream Jess as someone totally different than herself, in some form of undress.
Or about zombies.
But this was definitely a Jess dream, a very weird one at that, sleeping Nick had never dreamed of being her...
Through the strangeness I found the time to take advantage of the situation I was put in, mocking the know-it-all attitude Jess always claimed she didn't have, taking a look a the goods, messing up her pristine room, using her voice to gush about how dreamy I am, you know the usual stuff.
After finally getting bored of all of my shenanigans, I heard a shill scream followed by a loud manly "NIIIIIICK."
As the door flung open I was met with my face, and I mean my man face, not the one I was currently sporting in this dream.
"Jesus what did I drink last night."