After the Storm, a criminal minds fanfic

THIS HAS MENTION OF SUICIDE…KINDA. VERY GRAPHIC. IF YOU KNOW THIS WILL MAKE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE PLEASE DON'T READ.

PLEASE FOR MY OWN SANITY, DON'T READ.

This is a song fic (after the storm-mumford and sons) I OWN NOTHING!

This will be my last fic for a while. I don't know how this happened, but apparently I am insensitive to fictional characters and have a very sick mind. I appreciate everyone's concern (see comments for fic DOA.)

I respect everyone's opinion, I really do, but those comments have seriously left me drained. I can't do this, not now. Not ever.

I should not ever have underestimated the power of words. I thought I was just writing a fic, based on my own opinion.

I thought the purpose of was to express your opinions, whatever they may be without fear of total judgment. Apparently I have the wrong idea.

I apologize if I offended anyone( I'm pretty sure you would not be reading this if I did, but I'll try anyway.) I just want everyone to understand that I am not a mean hearted person, just someone who feels too much too hard too fast, and I'm sorry if that has clouded my judgment as well.

Please enjoy this fic, no comments are necessary.

And after the storm,
I run and run as the rains come
And I look up, I look up,
on my knees and out of luck,
I look up.

Morgan's stomach knots with fear.

He should have paid attention. Reid needed him and he had his head stuck in his ass.

Morgan hurts.

Reid hurts more.

Morgan gun the gas, tires screeching as he makes his way to Reid's house. He shouldn't have let him go. He slams on the breaks, parking crookedly against the curb. He slams the door behind him, fumbling for his keys. He finds Reid's and tinkers with the door until he unlocks it.

"Reid?" Morgan calls out, eyes sweeping the area.

No sign of life.

Night has always pushed up day
You must know life to see decay
But I won't rot, I won't rot
Not this mind and not this heart,
I won't rot.

The waning light filters through the drawn curtains.

It is silent and still as if death cast its shroud over Reid's apartment.

Morgan's heart leaps to his throat, lodging like hard candy.

"Reid, come on man, answer." Morgan's tempted to draw his gun as he sees a shadowy figure standing near Reid's fireplace.

"Reid?" Morgan whispers as Reid places the letters against a picture.

And I took you by the hand
And we stood tall,
And remembered our own land,
What we lived for.

The picture…

The team had went to the beach last summer. Reid wouldn't get in the water, so Morgan hoisted him over his shoulder and dove in with him. Reid came sputtering up, kitten glowering at Morgan.

Morgan tried to hold back his laughter. He did.

Reid sighed, bursting out in laughter as well, grabbing Morgan's hand and smiles. Garcia snapped the picture.

The picture is on the mantel.

There are three letters on the mantle.

The first is addressed to Morgan.

And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see what you find there,
With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair.

Reid's fingers tremble as Morgan calls out his name again.

Morgan didn't see the gun.

Reid raises it in a sorry salute, the small barrel pressing against his temple.

And now I cling to what I knew
I saw exactly what was true
But oh no more.
That's why I hold,
That's why I hold with all I have.
That's why I hold.

He's lost so much, so much that he could never get back.

Morgan knows. Morgan hates him for it. Reid has to go.

Reid was tired (past tense)

Reid is tired (present tense)

Reid had been tired (future past tense)

Reid's tired of being tired.

His fingers clench as he holds the gun in his hand, the weapon shaking as his tendons stand in high relief.

He's sobbing silently, hazel orbs shining as he stares at Morgan.

"Go." Reid whimpers as Morgan stands his ground.

I won't die alone and be left there.
Well I guess I'll just go home,
Oh God knows where.
Because death is just so full and man so small.
Well I'm scared of what's behind and what's before.

"Reid, please put down the gun." Morgan's voice is filled with fear as he watches Reid study him. His face, his body…

Reid's letting go. He's saying goodbye.

"Reid please. Put the gun down." Morgan's shoulders shake as he tries to hold back the sobs, body shaking like a tree in a hurricane.

Reid's eyes are lifeless as he pulls back the hammer, the click thunderous in the room. So out of place.

This should not be happening here. Not to Reid. Not to Morgan…the team.

"Reid I love you. I- I can't handle being without you.I- please, Reid." Morgan's sobbing hard as Reid breathes in deep.

"I can't…It all hurts. I-I feel too much. Too hard. Too fast. I'm too full and I can't-"Reid chokes out as he stares at Morgan.

"I'm tired." Reid's shoulders sag.

"I know pretty boy. But I'm here. I know I can't make it any better, but I understand." Morgan laments, Reid listens.

"And if you put the gun down, we can do this, together. We can figure this out kid. Please." Morgan murmurs taking a step towards Reid.

Reid looks so small as Morgan places his hand over Reid's, steadying his shaking hand.

"'m so sorry." Reid sobs as he presses his face against Morgan's shoulder.

Morgan puts the safety back on, the click makes Reid sob harder.

Morgan takes the gun and tosses it, wrapping his free hand around Reid squeezing him tight as he can.

"Shh… It's alright Reid. I'm here. I'm here." He runs his fingers up Reid's spine, running his fingers through Reid's hair. Reid cries until he's empty, but still he could cry some more.

"I'm here." Morgan says, rocking Reid as the sun slowly sets behind them.

Okay, so once again, I wanted to apologize and thank you for your time and patience.

Forever,

da-sm.