Hey Everyone, I love Zade, and I'm really frustrated at what the writers have done, but there is one thing they did do that made me happy, and that's what I am writing about. Zoe's inner monologue after she comes home from the reception. Not something I'm super proud of (I'm not a fan of this style of writing), but I did want to share my observations about what happened with everyone else.
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A year ago, if you told me I'd be living in Bluebell Alabama, I'd laugh you off. There wasn't any doubt in my mind that I was going to be a surgeon. There wasn't any doubt in my mind that I belonged anywhere other than New York City.
Well…if I'm being honest, I actually didn't feel like I belonged anywhere, but New York City had been my residence for so long, I just assumed I'd never leave. It was comfortable. Small town Bluebell really threw me for a loop.
Bluebell, was rough for me. Of course, there was its crazy weather, but it was that small town no privacy rule. Everyone knew you, everyone wanted to know what was going on in your life. And then, there were the people that did end up knowing you. There was George. There was Lemon. There was Brick. There was Harley. I couldn't even count the number of friends I had on one hand. But I guess if I thought about it, Lavon and whatever relationship I had with Annabeth were better than anything I had back in New York City.
Then there was Wade.
We fought. We loved. And right now, I can't even begin to understand what's happened. My head hasn't quite accepted it, although my heart sure does hurt like hell.
Whatever is between us, or I guess what isn't anymore, I realized something while dancing with Lavon. Wade changed me, and like who I am now, even if it has to be without him.
Wade made me care about Bluebell. He didn't give me the easy route out and avoid those silly town festivals. Even before we started dating, he never let me get away with anything half-assed. He made me care about the Founder's Day Parade. Sure, I wanted to impress the town, but I didn't want to disappoint Lavon or ruin the day for anyone else…even if I did manage to ruin the parade.
And more than that, Wade made me get out of my own bubble. Life isn't just about me, especially as a town doctor. Staying home for Thanksgiving to help that kid believe in Planksgiving again. Well, it was worth it.
Wade helped me realize that I care about this town. I didn't realize it that they cared about me, though. I thought I'd always be the second choice to Brick, an alternative. But then, Bluebell went and turned my world around again.
It just clicked one day. People were happy to see me and I was happy to see them. I wanted to hear about my patient's ridiculous amounts of cats. I wanted to be their confidant. I wanted to be their doctor mentally, not just physically.
Then Jonah came. Jonah shook my fragile new relationship with Bluebell. When they chose him over me, it felt as bad as not hearing from my dad…Ethan…I felt abandoned. Bluebell was my place! He couldn't just walk in here after a year and make everyone forget about me!
…And then tonight happened. I feel like my heart is swimming somewhere down in my stomach. I feel so confused! So hurt. So...I don't know! Words don't cut it when it comes to the heart.
But there was one part of tonight that made me smile, despite the overpowering waves of heartbreak threatening to break me in the middle of Wanda and Tom's wedding: Bluebell was my home. It was not just another place that I lived. I belong here.
Jonah may have caught their attention over me for a few days. He was a part of their family coming home after a long trip. I get that now. But, I am a part of that family, too. And Bluebell, these people care about me just like Jonah. I tried to hide my sorrow for the sake of the wedding, but people knew something was wrong. Word travels like wildfire here and George's 'monster' was pretty blatant.
People saw my pain and they comforted me. They tried to make me smile. They tried to distract me with dances and small talk. They tried to protect me. They lashed out at Wade, one of their own, on my behalf. Even Tansy, and everyone knows we aren't the best of friends.
Whatever happened with Wade and I, and believe me, it hurts to just think about, I have a consolation. Bluebell is my home and these people are not just friends, they are family. They protect me, they care about me, and they will take care of me. Just like I would for them. It took me a while to realize, but they don't see me as a fleeting image- someone just passing by for a year or so. I have a place in this town.
I am Zoe Hart, proud resident of Bluebell, Alabama.
Thanks for reading, let me know if you were thinking the same thing about the end of that episode!