I Drove all Night
A/N: I don't really know if this will qualify as a Song Fic, but while driving today I heard this song and it made me think of Sam and Dean, and before I knew it, I had another story going on in my head.
I am dedicating this to JamesParker, a great author I met on this site, because we have said we didn't get song fic, but I hope he will read this anyhow.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own the characters, I just use and abuse them. I also don't own the song 'I Drove all Night', by Roy Orbison, which is what this piece is based off.
WINCEST: Why? Because I can
Please review, love to know what people think!
The moon was absent, making the night sky appear onyx, the only light permeating the vastness of black were thin streaks of gray clouds, lines of wispy smoke drawn through the darkness.
The headlights of the impala were like radiant orbs eating up the asphalt, the rest of the sleek car almost invisible in the unending darkness. Twin beacons of light shining from the front, the only proof the car existed in the night. On the road. In the universe.
Dean never felt more at home, never more himself than he did behind the wheel of his car. It was an extension of himself, as much a definition of him as the worn leather jacket he shrugged his shoulders into every morning, or the nickel-plated .45 he stowed in his baby's glove box as he drove.
Dean didn't have much in the way of things in this life, and he didn't often mind. His world was often a series of small one-shots. Towns, motels, hunts, bars. They chopped into the frames of his mind like stuttered pictures, often blurring together as the road got longer. He didn't mind that either.
Tonight Dean drove fast, pushed his baby hard, knowing she would take him where he needed to go. He reached for the radio and a burst of static filled the chilled night air inside the car, startling him briefly as he scanned the air waves for a song to complete his mood.
He struck gold his fourth scan in, as a honey-voiced D.J. announced the next song would be 'I Drove All Night' by Roy Orbison. Dean felt his whole body tense in anticipation as he waited for the song to begin. He didn't have to wait long.
I had to escape, the city was sticky and cruel
Maybe I should have called you first, but I was dying to get to you
I was dreaming as I drove, the long straight road ahead, uh huh yeah
Could taste your sweet kisses your arms opened wide, the fever for you was just burning me up inside
I drove all night
To get to you
Is that all right?
I drove all night
Crept in your room
Woke you from your sleep, to make love to you
Is that all right?
I drove all night
Dean's heart beat rapidly in his chest, keeping time to the song, his own thoughts straying to his reason for shooting down a lone highway in the middle of the night.
Sam
The name merely a whisper in Dean's psyche and yet powerful enough to affect his whole being.
Dean wondered every once in a while when his love for his brother had shifted. It wasn't some big catastrophic moment that had occurred, rearranging Sam from his place in Dean's life as brother into something more, something everything. It had crept up slowly, touching Dean in every way possible, infecting him with the most beautiful disease known to man. Dean was in love with the heartbreak that was his brother.
He mused in time to the rhythm of the song. Maybe it was the 'just this side of too long' brown locks that flopped over Sam's eyes, flicking out of the way now and again to reveal hazel eyes, ripe with secrets, promises, smiles. All for Dean.
Maybe it was the cheekbones that flushed continuously whether in passion or embarrassment, drawing attention to their slanted perfection. Flushed skin that felt hot to seeking lips and a flickering tongue, subtle with a flavor that was uniquely Sam, a taste Dean never seemed to get enough of.
Maybe it was the dimples, always there in the quirk of a heavy bottomed mouth, but so prominent in a full blown grin, Dean could do nothing but hold on at the sight of them, completely wrecked like a ship hitting rocks when that full tilt smile was thrown at him, whether by design or carelessness. Dean never cared why he received that smile, as long as he never stopped.
It might be the body. Long and lean, muscular and tanned, wrapped around him in the night sometimes begging, other times controlling. Sam seemed to know what Dean needed like no other. Times Sam would come to him, lower lip bit between teeth, hazel eyes pleading silently, hands trembling as they reached for Dean in semi-darkness, speaking of need and love. Other times Dean being grabbed, hauled around like a sack of potatoes, slammed against the nearest wall, table, or maybe the car, a large thigh planted between his own legs, Sam's mouth possessive, just this side of angry as he sucked marks into Dean's neck. Taking Dean to the edge with hot hands scraping over him, broad shoulders holding him captive, Sam taking what he wanted, NEEDED from Dean.
Maybe it was how well Sam knew him. How Sam knew to be quiet when Dean needed to think, knew to push Dean when he needed to fight, knew when to back him up, knew when to back him down. He knew when to touch Dean's thigh lightly for reassurance and he knew when Dean needed a punch in the arm because he was being an asshole. He knew him so well he was, in a way, an extension of Dean himself, like his car, his jacket, his gun. Only infinitely more precious.
Or maybe it was all of it. Every moment, caught on film, like Dean's head was sponsored by Nikon and his brain's job was to snap constant pictures of his moments with Sam.
All Dean knew what somehow Sam had seeped into his very being, beyond being family, not just because of blood, and despite being his brother, Sam was not any of those things to Dean anymore. Instead he was all those things and so much more. He was Dean's heart, his conscience, his partner, his….everything. His life. Sometimes Dean felt like he could barely breathe unless Sam was right beside him.
Which brings him back to the road in front of him, disappearing quickly under his car as it launched itself forward towards his destination. Towards Sam. So Dean could breathe again.
He felt the separation in his very bones, ten days without Sam might as well be a lifetime. The hunt had been necessary and impromptu and after the previous hunt where Sam had suffered three broken ribs and a fractured ankle thanks to a nest of asshole vampires, Dean had to take it on without him.
Dean flinched inwardly, recalling the moment of terror he had felt when he had seen Sam flung across the room by a female vampire that looked like a sweet and innocent 21 year old girl until you got up close enough to see the manic bloodlust glittering in her eyes, or the rows of fangs protruding from her mouth. He had thought he might not make it to him fast enough, that she might take Sam, and by extension, Dean's whole life away from him and Dean had not even felt his own feet underneath him, he was sure he was flying through the air as his machete arced down forcefully, blood spraying wildly into the air, her head rolling away with a small thud in the corner.
Sam had been beat up, but it wasn't critical. It did however mean that when they got the call from Bobby about the werewolf two states over that Sam would have to stay behind while Dean went to deal with it.
Ten days.
The song lapsed into the second chorus and Dean brought himself back from his own wayward thoughts to listen to the song, focusing on the lyrics, the message in the music.
What in this world keeps us from falling apart?
No matter where I go
I hear the beating of our one heart
I think about you when the night is cold and dark
Uh huh yeah
No one can move me the way that you do
Nothing erases this feeling between me and you
I drove all night
To get to you
Is that all right?
I drove all night, crept in your room
Woke you from your sleep, to make love to you
Is that all right?
I drove all night
Dean's face heated slightly as he hummed the tune to himself, thinking that this should be his and Sam's song. Yeah, it was girly as fuck to think, but hey, he was in his own head, so he could be as chick flick as he wanted.
He wanted.
A highway road sign came up swiftly, the green and white sign proclaiming Dean was only 100 miles outside Santa Fe, and his foot clomped down even harder on the accelerator, the sign reminding him that he was getting ever closer to Sam, less than a hundred miles since their motel was on the outside of Santa Fe, the wrong side as it were, because it was cheaper. Didn't matter how cheap the room was, how bad the food was, how watered down the beer was. Sam was there. To Dean that meant it was paradise.
Ok that was a bit chick flick of him to think.
A small strip of fiery orange appeared on the horizon in front of him, the dawn trying to break its way through all the dark and Dean's lips quirked up, thinking of the night he had left. Sam had been drinking orange soda instead of beer, and Dean had teased him about being an 11 year old girl.
Until he had pressed his lips to Sam's, swiping his tongue across Sam's lips, tasting a mixture of pepperoni from the pizza and the overwhelming taste of orange and he had moaned into Sam's mouth, his hands moving to instantly fist in all that hair, pulling Sam closer to him.
Sam had been sweet that night. Hands holding Dean close, allowing Dean to drink from his mouth greedily, Sam hungrily yet gently nibbling on the sides of Dean's own mouth.
Dean moving Sam over to the bed, being oh so careful because Sam was still injured. Sam had laid down on the bed, his eyes watching Dean's every move as he undressed, his arms held out for Dean the moment Dean was naked, reaching, wanting.
Dean had covered Sam's body with his own, moving carefully, pressing soft kisses all over Sam, worshipping him with his mouth. His hands had trailed gentle tickles down Sam's arms and thighs, sliding slowly over his muscled abdomen, delighting in the quiver he felt rumble through Sam's body at his touch.
Sam had sighed and brought Dean's lips back to his own, thrusting his hips up so his erection was pressed against Dean's groaning his pleasure against Dean's lips.
It hadn't been much, just touching, stroking, thrusting together, bringing each other to orgasm by simply being close, tethered together in the darkness like they were one, not two. No, it hadn't been mad, monkey sex. It hadn't been much.
And yet, it had been everything.
Afterwards, Dean had cleaned Sam up gently, checked his ribs, rewrapped the tensor bandage around his ankle, putting a pillow from the other bed under it, turned off the light and gotten into bed beside Sam.
Sam had turned to him, eyes lit by the streetlight outside the crappy motel room, making them look more gray than hazel, fascinating Dean. They were slightly shimmering in the dimmed light, and it had taken Dean a moment to realize it was unshed tears in Sam's eyes.
"Whats wrong, did I hurt you?" Dean had thought they had been careful, but dammit he didn't want to hurt Sam. He shouldn't have touched him when he was injured, but sometimes he was almost powerless over his need for Sam.
Sam shook his head, the action making him shed a few tears and a small smile coming to his lips.
"No, no Dean, you didn't hurt me. I just." His eyes had crashed into Dean's and Dean felt butterflies in his stomach at Sam's expression. He held his breath, unaware he was doing so.
"I just. Um. I don't know, Dean. I just really love you. In love with you. Fuck, I am a girl and I just gave you ammo for the next 20 years but fuck it. I am. In love with you."
Dean's chest had felt like it was exploding when Sam spoke those words and he gasped out the breath he didn't know he was holding, and gave Sam one of his patented smirks. Because it had all been too much.
It was the first time Sam had said that to him. Dean didn't say it back, couldn't. Not yet.
So he had leaned forward and said, "Enough of the chick flick moments bitch and kiss me goodnight."
Sam had tipped his face and looked him in the eyes for a long moment, and Dean knew he wasn't fooling Sam for one fucking minute, but he also knew Sam wouldn't push him.
Sam puckered his mouth like a child getting their bed time kiss and Dean had pressed in gently, savoring.
He fell asleep pressed close to Sam, their hands entwined.
Perfect.
The song ended, and a commercial started, and Dean leaned forward, flicking off the radio with two fingers. He didn't want another song in his head. That was the one he wanted as he made his way back to Sam. To his life.
He pulled into the motel parking lot just as the dawn had fully come into fruition. The sky was still a mixture of bruised plum and shades of orange and pink, and Dean had paused for just a moment as he got out of the car. He rarely took the time to enjoy something as trivial as the dawn, but on this morning, he was captured by its beauty, and he tilted his head to take in the whole sky around him.
It was stunning.
He opened the chipped and faded green motel room door quietly, not wanting to wake Sam. His eyes scanned the room immediately until they found Sam's form wrapped tightly in the bed.
His breath came back to him then and he closed the door softly, shucked off his jacket, throwing it on the back of a chair, as he made his way over to the bed.
Sam was turned towards the wall and he just stood over him for a moment, taking in the tousled hair, the beautiful profile fit for a coin in the pale dawn light coming through the windows. He reached down to stroke, to touch, needing the connection.
"Dean.?" The voice was husky with sleep and low, but it still made Dean smile.
"Yeah Sammy, its me."
A large hand reached out blindly and Dean took it in his own, the warmth from it sliding into his whole body, into his heart.
"Glad your back, man, I missed you. Didn't think you would be here until dinner time."
Gazing down at Sam, Dean felt a tightness in his chest, an emotion that was a lot like love but so much more, it frightened him deep in his core with its intensity. In a shaky voice he said,
"Yeah, I drove all night." And then he added in his own mind, 'to get to you.'
He didn't have to say it. Sam would already know.
Could taste your sweet kisses your arms opened wide
This fever for you is just burning me up inside
I drove all night to get to you
Is that all right?
I drove all night, crept in your room
Is that all right?
I drove all night.
END