Standard disclaimer applies.
Companion piece to There's Something About Shinjo. It would help if you read that one first.
Gen-fic. Yagi was dressing up nicely and having secret meetings on Saturdays. She never told Aniya about them and boy just had to get to the bottom of it!
Note: Thank you VoltTackleShipping4Everand js8999 for the reviews.
Chronicles of Jealousy, by Aniya Keiichi
"I still say we should have worn a trench coat, or at least one of those hats like Holmes. Spying is serious business, guys."
"Would you shut up, Wakana," snapped Aniya from his position crouched behind a tree.
"The combination of you and a trench coat would have gotten all of us arrested for public indecency," laughed Hiyama. He lunged out of the way as Wakana's fist moved to make an introduction to his face.
"I didn't ask you guys to come along," said Aniya crossly as he tossed a small pebble at them, which hit Hiyama in the back of the head. Wakana laughed.
"What are friends for, Aniya? What kind of people would we be if we didn't back out pal up when he needed us," said Sekikawa. The underlying cynicism in the comment wasn't lost on Aniya.
"And what kind of friend would you be if you didn't let us in on you secret little reconnaissance mission?"
"Do you even know what reconnaissance means?" said Hiyama.
"Shut the hell up! As if you know," said Wakana, moving into an attacking position before Mikoshiba grabbed him around the waist.
"Come on, you guys. This isn't the time or place."
"Idiots," said Aniya, rolling his eyes as he surveyed his target again to make sure that the person was still in sight.
"Why the hell are you on his side, Mikoshiba? I'm your catcher! He's just some loser."
"Hey!"
This time both Okada and Yufune entered the fray.
"Come on, guys. We're on a mission here," said Okada, barely containing the amusement in his voice.
"A top secret mission, nya. Just like James Bond."
"Wakana, Hiyama, just calm down," said Mikoshiba. "We're here for Aniya—"
"Like I need you guys anyway!"
"But…" continued Mikoshiba uninterrupted, "I kind of like the hat idea," he added with an impish grin.
Wakana clapped once. "Aha! A true fan, Mikoshiba! This detective business isn't really a detective business if you're not properly dressed for it!"
"This isn't a detective business! Go home!"
"Aren't we missing a few people, nya?" asked Yufune, looking around at the incomplete team.
"A secret undercover mission involves being secretive and undercover," answered Wakana as a matter of fact. "Having Hiratsuka here would be like putting a very loud, very aggravated bull in a fine china shop. I bribed Imaoka to keep him occupied."
"What about Shinjo, nya?"
Wakana sighed as if he were talking to the neighbour's three year old pest of a child. "A secret undercover mission involved being secretive and undercover. Shinjo is like nine foot fourteen and blonde."
"The guy could be a model," said Sekikawa unexpectedly. "Has anyone noticed that Shinjo doesn't even really look Japanese?"
"Would you guys just shut your traps!"
"Sorry, Aniya," everyone answered simultaneously and continued to trail after Aniya as he acted as lookout; hiding behind dustbins and corners while keeping an eagle's eye on his mark.
"Does anyone even know who we're following?" asked Okada as he strutted along, hands in his pockets and acting like trailing someone was just all in a days' work.
"A rogue CIA agent who just stole top secret government files and is planning on selling them to the highest bidding terrorist group?" said Wakana.
"Wakana's brain?" said Hiyama.
"An opposing baseball team?" said Mikoshiba.
"Aliens, nya?"
"Why don't we just ask him?" suggested Sekikawa. Everyone had a look on their faces as if the thought had never occurred to them.
"Hey, Aniya," Okada called, opting to be the sacrificial virgin to Aniya's frustrated wrath. "Who are you spying on anyway?"
Aniya grumbled something unintelligible in reply.
Instead of asking again, Okada decided to obtain the answer himself. Motioning for the others to keep their distance incase Aniya were to spontaneously combust—the guy had been completely on the edge all day—he made his way to where Aniya was squatting behind a bush. Careful to keep himself out of arms reach, Okada tried to spot the person most likely to be Aniya's target.
There was some old lady dragging a shopping cart behind her; a nervous looking middle-schooler leafing through what looked suspiciously like a porn magazine; two old guys perched on the bench pretending to be immersed in their up-side down newspaper while ogling the high school girls walking past them; Yagi; a dog pissing on some poor loser's shoes; a couple of—Wait…Yagi?
"You're trailing after Yagi?" asked Okada, bemused.
"EH?" exclaimed the other guys.
"Lucky we didn't bring Hiratsuka along, nya."
"I-I-I'm not!"
"You are!" laughed Okada. "You're jealous that Yagi is going out somewhere and didn't tell you!"
"I couldn't care less what she's doing with her time," said Aniya, completely unconvincingly.
"Poor guy's sweating bullets," laughed Wakana. "What's the thing they say? Jealousy is a green eyed monster?"
"He's jealous that Yagi's got a boyfriend and didn't tell him," said Hiyama.
"I'm not jealous damn it! And she doesn't have a boyfriend! Shut the hell up and just go home!"
"You've seriously lost it if you think I'm about to leave when everything's just got so interesting," said Wakana, receiving a high-five from Hiyama.
Okada was thoroughly amused. Sekikawa was laughing. Yufune said, "It's really sweet, nya," and suddenly Mikoshiba went, "But guys, you know that if Yagi has a boyfriend she might not have time for baseball club activities anymore," and all laughter ceased.
"What?" exclaimed Wakana and Hiyama.
"B-But she's the manager, nya!"
"I know that, but she might decide that she has better things to do with her time instead of babysitting us and our bad habits."
Aniya was quiet. The thought hadn't occurred to him either and proved even more incentive to stop whatever Yagi was doing behind his back.
"Tell us everything you know, Aniya!" said Wakana determinedly.
"We're going to put a stop to this!"
"I just know that she's been going out every Saturday afternoon. I just noticed it a couple of weeks ago, but I think it's been going on for a long time. She always acted like she had some big secret she wasn't telling me."
"It must be a guy," said Sekikawa. "What else explanation is there? The secret outings, the…the…all this secrecy!"
"I don't want Yagi to leave, nya. Who will be the manager?"
"No one wants her to leave," said Okada seriously. "We're going to put a stop to this once and for all."
"Hey guys! She's going into a Maid Café!" called Mikoshiba.
"You know I've never seen Yagi out of uniform or jersey. She's actually pretty cute," said Wakana. He received a brutal right hook for his comment.
"You think she's meeting the guy in there?"
"What else would she be doing in a Maid Café? Girls don't go to Maid Café's!" said Aniya with the air of someone with experience.
"We can't all go in together, that would just be suspicious," said Okada.
"I'll offer my services then," volunteered Wakana.
"Forget him; he left his brain in the catcher's box."
"What did you say, you bastard!"
"You heard what I said."
"I think Mikoshiba should go. He'd less likely to make a complete fool of himself," suggested Okada.
"You calling us fools?"
Okada didn't dignify their question with a reply. "Aniya's too noticeable, Sekikawa and I…well, as is obvious. Wakana and Hiyama are too loud. Yufune should go too to back up Mikoshiba."
"Roger, nya!" said Yufune excitedly with a salute.
"I'm happy to help," said Mikoshiba.
"Remember, don't make a scene. Just see who she's with and report back to us. We'll take it from there."
"Roger!"
So off they went. Mikoshiba was shaking in his shoes and Yufune was practically bounding towards the Café, until a sharp hiss from the bush brought him back down to earth. Both of them made their grand entrance, losing their Maid Café virginity in the process and got a seat near the window in the corner. They scouted the entire shop but didn't see Yagi anywhere in sight.
"Over there, nya!" exclaimed Yufune, pointing to a spot outside where Yagi was sitting at a couples table near the very end of the Café's garden. She was alone.
"Well that was anti-climactic," said Mikoshiba, almost disappointed.
"Maybe Yagi just really likes the drinks here, nya," said Yufune.
Mikoshiba and Yufune waited another two minutes, but still nothing happened.
"I guess we jumped to conclusion too soon. We should tell the guys," said Mikoshiba, moving to leave when a waitress came over and places a large cup of warm milk on their table.
"My drink is here! You go ahead first, Mikoshiba. I'll catch up, nya."
Mikoshiba sighed and nodded. As Yufune was about to down his drink with a chirpy, "Bottom's up, nya," something large and blonde in the corner of his eye caught his attention. His steaming up of milk almost dropped onto the table when, as he watched, Shinjo appeared and took the seat across from Yagi and Yagi actually looked excited that he was there. Even more shocking, Shinjo actually looked pleased that she was there too.
"Nya!" exclaimed Yufune and with one giant leap, he bounded for the door, weaving through confused and irritated customers and waitresses and made his way towards his friends as fast as his feet would take him. He reached there in time as Wakana were just about to walk off muttering something about Pachinko.
"Guys, nya!" he stopped short, panting. "Yagi…Yagi…I saw her, nya!"
"That's been fully established, Yufune," growled Aniya, massaging the bridge of his nose.
"No! I saw her with a guy! The guy, nya!"
"What are you talking about—"
"It's Shinjo!"
There was a proverbial explosion as mini volcanoes in everyone's head simultaneously erupted.
"Wait a minute," said Wakana with a nervous laugh. "I think I got something in my ear but I swear I heard you say—"
"It's Shinjo, nya!"
"Yeah, that's what I thought I heard."
"No, it's really Shinjo! Yagi's meeting Shinjo and Shinjo came and they sat together and Yagi actually looks happy that Shinjo's there and Shinjo doesn't look like he's about to beat the shit out of anyone!"
"Nya," said Sekikawa. That was the only thing he could say.
Everyone's attention snapped towards Aniya who looked like he was about to have a stroke and a heart attack at the same time.
"Holy shit," said Mikoshiba.
Everyone was momentarily befuddled and it took them twice the normal time to react when Aniya suddenly went charging towards the Maid Café. Shit was about to hit the really, really big fan.
"Aniya!"
The door of the Café was almost lifted off its hinges when Aniya burst through with a roar. "Shinjo!" he growled, shoving people out of his way as he searched the place for Yagi and Shinjo. Somewhere in the deep recesses of his eardrums, he picked up the sound of the familiar laughter coming from outside.
People leaped out of his rampaging path and he kicked open the door leading to the garden section.
The commotion caught the attention of Yagi and Shinjo, who looked up startled as Aniya came bursting through the doors like a bat out of hell.
"Shinjo!" roared Aniya. "What the hell are you two doing?" he asked, stomping over to where they were sitting. "You…" he stared at Shinjo, who had a look of complete bewilderment on his face, then at Yagi, "And you?"
It took a moment for Yagi to realize. She looked at the dark, menacing expression on Aniya's face and then at Shinjo, who was looking at Aniya like he'd completely gone off the deep end. There was a click as the proverbial light bulb came on in her head and the only thing she could do was laugh. "Kei-chan, you're jealous!"
The rage almost completely drained out of Aniya's face, while Shinjo's took on an uncharacteristic horrified expression as the realization dawned on him.
"What the hell was your perverted mind conjuring up, Aniya?" asked Shinjo.
"W-What the hell are you talking about? What are you two doing together here anyway?"
The others chose that exact moment to make their entrance, shouting Aniya's name and coming to screeching halt behind the, by this time, almost red-faced Aniya. Yagi was laughing and Shinjo looked at him like he was completely nuts.
There was a moment of tense silence as everyone looked to everyone else for an answer until Mikoshiba finally voiced what was on everyone's mind.
"What's going on?"
Yagi didn't stop laughing, instead her amusement doubled. Shinjo sighed and decided that he didn't want to be a part of the insanity anymore.
"You mean you guys followed me all the way here? What did you think I was doing?"
"Umm…having a date with Shinjo?" said Okada hesitantly.
Shinjo almost snorted and Yagi doubled over with laughter.
"Why the hell are you laughing? You're in a Maid Café together! What is everyone supposed to think?"
"That we're two friends having a drink together?"
"I told you to stop watching all those porn movies, Aniya," said Shinjo.
"But…we…you…and…every Saturday?"
Yagi was silent for a moment. "Should we tell them?" she asked Shinjo, who just scoffed.
"Do what you want."
Yagi cleared her throat. "The truth is…well, Kei-chan. The truth is Shinjo-kun and I, we have a baby together."
There was a moment of tense silence; Mikoshiba would later testify that he actually heard the sound of blood vessels in Aniya's brain exploding.
"Wha—You…what the…HAH?" said Okada, losing the ability to formulate words.
"Guys, meet our baby, Keichin," and from her lap Yagi lifted up a fat, pale grey cat that mewed disapprovingly at being disturbed from its comfortable nap.
"It's a cat, nya!" said Yufune.
"No shit, Sherlock," said Wakana.
"What the hell is going on?" Aniya almost shouted; his eyes were crazed and he had the air of someone who could not take anymore shit.
Yagi felt pity for her best friend and decided to just come out with it. "Shinjo-kun found a kitten during junior high and we've been raising it together. This is the kitten."
The fact did an uncanny impression of Tetris stage one as it slowly clicked into place in everyone's head. Then everyone let out a simultaneous, 'Oooooooooh' as they finally almost understood the situation. Didn't explain the Maid Café though, but everyone decided to let that one slide.
"Well, as much fun as it's been—"
"You weren't invited in the first place!"
"—I have a Pachinko machine with my name on it," said Wakana, cracking his fingers in preparation.
"I'll second that, man," said Hiyama and with that, the both of them made their exit.
Slowly the group started dispersing. Okada yawned loudly and moaned the lack of association he'd had with his bed that morning. Mikoshiba decided to help his sister at the shop and Yufune realized that he still had one warm cup of milk waiting for him on the table by the window.
In the end it was just Yagi, Aniya and Shinjo's physical presence left, as his mind had wondered away to a land decidedly saner.
"Your jealousy is very cute, Kei-chan."
"I wasn't jealous! And don't call me Kei-chan! What the hell is up with the cat's name anyway?"
"Keichin? Isn't it cute? It reminds me of you and Shinjo-kun."
Aniya looked at his brooding friend whose subconscious was currently completely lost to the world.
"It's stupid. You're insulting the cat by giving it such an idiotic name. If it were human I'd be inclined to beat it up on sheer principal alone."
"That's just mean," said Yagi, but she was laughing. "Do you want something to drink?"
"Why would I want anything to drink here, especially with you and cat boy over there?"
"You're lying, I can see it," said Yagi before she called for a waitress and ordered a mocha drink with extra whipped cream for Aniya.
"I hate whipped cream. Whipped cream is only for girls and cats."
"You're not going to win any arguments over whipped cream with her, so don't even bother," said Shinjo, snapping out of his reverie.
"Welcome back to the land of the living, coma boy," said Aniya. Looking over, he saw residue in Shinjo's cup that probably used to be a perfect swirl of whipped cream. He decided to just take his word for it.
"So let's talk more about this jealousy issue," said Yagi, stroking the head of the purring lump of fur on her lap like an evil mastermind.
"Shut up."
Shinjo laughed.
Not two minutes later, Aniya's mocha extra whipped cream arrived. He took one sip, and decided that whipped cream sissified everything, just like girls and cats…but…well, maybe, just maybe it wasn't all that bad.
The end.