Sometimes I just try to remember what my life was like BS. Before Slayer. Before Merrick suddenly appeared and told me that I was the new saver of the world. When the only things I worry about are whether or not my hair is last year and if my nail polish isn't chipping.


Now it's whether or not I'm alive or dead and if my boyfriend can stay chipped long enough for me to get over him.


Life really sucks when you're the Slayer. I mean, I'm just your average girl. Who has to carry the fate of the world on her hands every damn day.


I admit, it was easier when I had Faith and Kendra. Two Slayers got the job done faster, and I had more quality time with the mom and the Scoobies.


Now it seems that everyone is falling apart. Willow's slowly dying inside from her breakup with Tara, Xander and Anya are already making marriage plans, and I'm so caught up in Spike that Dawn and I never have any time together.


I felt really guilty when I walked inside and saw Tara sitting there with Dawn the other day. I should have been there. I should wake up with her in the morning and try to make pancakes.


Well, it's just my life. I have to accept it. I've had to accept it for five years.