Paint Chips

Chapter 1: Introductions

Mount St. Hillary, Jane Cregan decided, wasn't as pretty as all the brochures made it out to be. She craned her neck and pressed the side of her face against the cool glass of the cruiser, squinting at the orange-red volcanic husk sticking out of the sky. They were still a good twenty minutes away from the mountain, rolling down a path shaded only by the claws of sleeping trees. She could hardly imagine how large it would be once they reached the base.

"You mind if I smoke?" Sergeant Brice glanced across the tangle of radios and wires separating the drivers and passenger's seats.

Jane shook her head. "No sir, not at all." She watched as he cracked down the window, allowing a chill of air to slip through, and lit up. He wasn't exactly what she had been expecting when she accepted the job with the Portland Police Department. Brice was short and thick, though not overweight. There was a prominent vein in his neck, and the very tips of his fingers were stained yellow with nicotine. He couldn't have been more than forty five, but his dark hair was already streaked with gray.

"This area is called the Boring Lava Fields," Brice jabbed at the trees surrounding the road with his thick fingers. "Used to be a ton of volcanoes 'round here way back when. They're all dormant now." He slowed the car as they drove over a small bridge, which was spanning an equally small river. "We usually patrol all over this area, 'specially on Fridays 'n' Saturdays. The big boys can't keep an eye on everything."

Jane gripped the edges of her seat as the car bounced over a rock in the road, which was becoming less paved and more gravel as they drove on. "That reminds me," she winced as a rock scraped against the undercarriage of the surprisingly resilient cruiser, "You haven't told me what this 'special squad' I've been assigned to is. Isn't this a little out of the Portland jurisdiction?"

"All in good time, kiddo," Brice reassured her. Jane almost balked; she was twenty-eight, and hadn't been called a 'kid' since she had graduated with a Masters in Police Science nearly four years ago. "Now, the cruiser we got set up for ya is a jeep, so it'll handle all these back roads with ease. Ya won't be goin' patrolling by yourself 'til you've gotten all these roads memorized, though."

Jane reached down for the bottle of Dr Pepper squished between her feet. "Just how big is the area we patrol?"

"Forty square miles," Brice grinned as she choked on the sugary drink. "Mount St. Hillary is squat in the middle. We cover the forest, the lava fields, and the roads goin' in and comin' out."

"Why is this mountain so important?" Jane wiped the sticky soda off her chin, "It's a dormant volcano, isn't it? There's no danger there."

Brice snorted in surprise and shook his head. "Don't you watch the news or read the paper?"

"I have a twelve-month-old daughter," Jane reminded him. "The only thing I get to watch anymore is Dora the Explorer or Mickey Mouse."

The sergeant chuckled and turned onto a side road that brought them deeper into the forest. "So what made an east-coaster like you move out to Portland?" He caught the corners of Jane's mouth twitch down before smoothing out.

"My father-in-law has cancer," she pressed her forehead against the window and watched the trees crowd closer to the road, growing thicker the closer they got to the majestic, dead volcano. "Some kind of bone cancer; it moves slow, but it's hard to fight." Her fingers tapped the door handle absently. "Conner, my husband, wanted to be close during the chemo and surgery."

"Ah. I'm, uh, sorry." Brice pulled the car to a stop near the edge of the road and shut off the engine. Jane gave him an odd look as he spoke into the radio clipped to his shoulder, a hand cupped around his mouth to keep the words muffled.

"Is everything alright?"

He nodded, silenced the radio and turned to face her. "What did the chief tell you about your new job?"

"Lets see…Chief Hall told me it was a special job concerning the safety of Portland and the surrounding towns and that I would be working closely with a large military unit."

Brice resisted the urge to smash his face against the steering wheel. "Of course he did. Leave it to Hall to forget all the important stuff." He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Okay, next question: What do you know about the Autobots?"

"The Autobots?" Apprehension began to gnaw at the edge of Jane's stomach. "You don't mean those big robot aliens that landed here a few years ago?"

Brice nodded.

"What do the aliens have to do with the Portland PD?" Jane's fingers gripped the edge of the Datsun's bucket seats.

"You technically aren't a member of the Portland PD." Brice settled back in his seat. "We use their jail, and call for backup when we need it, but that's it. "We have our own headquarters at Mount St. Hillary, and our own squad cars and lab." He rubbed his forehead. "We answer straight to the state government, and they answer to the feds."

Jane gave him a blank look. "I don't get it," she crossed her arms and sat back. "What do the aliens have to do with anything? Don't they live farther north, in Washington?"

Brice shook his head and gripped the steering wheel. "It'll be faster just to show you," he pulled the car back onto the road. His shift was nearly over, and as much as he liked the new girl, he didn't want to stay on longer than necessary.

Frowning and thoroughly irked, Jane settled back in her seat and watched as the road tilted upwards and crawled towards the mountain looming in the distance. All too soon, the ground leveled out and Brice pulled the car around a sharp bend. Mount St. Hilary loomed above them, an alien space craft buried deep in the base.

Standing near the blast doors of the alien base were three uniformed officers, deep in conversation. Between them, adding his own two cents to the discussion was a bright yellow robot only a few feet taller than his companions.

"Jane, welcome to the Ark." Brice pulled the car up to the entrance and cut the engine. The three humans and the robot looked at the car expectantly, conversation cut short. The sergeant climbed out of the cruiser and rolled his eyes as the four snapped off mock salutes. "Cut it out," he growled. "Get over here and meet our newest recruit." He glanced at the car and was surprised to see Jane still sitting in the passenger's seat, fingers dug deeply into the plush chair.

"I think you broke her, Sarge." The older of the officers ran a hand over his blonde buzz cut.

"She looks real freaked out," the younger of the two men shoved his hands deep in his pockets. "Wasn't she briefed about the 'bots?"

Brice glanced at the yellow bot. "No. Hall left out the Autobots, and every other important detail of this job. He's probably still angry that we got her instead of him." He ran a hand over his thinning hair. "No offense, Bumblebee, but could you give us a few minutes?"

Bee nodded. "Sure thing, Sarge, but what about Prowl?" He paused, optics darkening as he picked up a quick transmission, and nodded. "Oh, okay. Night guys!" With a cheery wave, he disappeared through the blast doors.

The third officer – a slim woman with light hair and a locket around her neck – popped open the passenger door. "You okay, sweetie?"

Jane blinked, snapping out of her daze, and looking up with a frown, "Yeah. Sorry." She muttered, unbuckling her stiff seatbelt. "It's just a lot to take in." The woman stepped back, allowing Jane to climb out of the cruiser.

"Oh trust me, we've all been there." She grabbed Jane's nearly-forgotten purse and swung the door shut. "Hall is a real ass, not telling you about any of this. I thought that was his job." She looked at her companions. "Why else would he sit around behind a desk all day?"

"Watch it, Patterson," Brice warned, though there was no real conviction in his voice. The woman merely beamed a smile and wink in his direction. "Jane, come over here please. Time to meet the team."

The uniformed officers lined up before their Sergeant, looking smart in their pressed, light blue uniforms and shining black boots. The two men flanked the woman, who looked decidedly pleased with the arrangement.

"Jane, this is Officer Zach West," the tall blonde man nodded. "Officer Matthew Brooks," the younger man winked at her through his thin, wire-rimmed glasses. "And the bane of my existence, Amanda Patterson," The woman stuck her tongue out at him, fists shoved against her hips. "Team, this is Jane Cregan. She's one of us now, so make her feel welcome." They nodded and moved forward to shake her hand.

"Welcome to the Autohumes, Jane!" Matthew shoved his glasses up his nose.

"Autohumes?"

They laughed at the curious (and slightly worried) look on her face. "Well, we're not bots right?" Amanda flicked Matthew's ear, "Although I have some doubts about our resident geek. I still can't believe Wheeljack hasn't replaced your arm with a high flammable weapon yet."

"I'm not a geek, I'm a technology enthusiast. And Wheeljacks not that bad," he took a step away from Amanda.

"He nearly blew my head off!"

"You weren't supposed to be in that hall in the first place!"

Zach rolled his eyes and stepped closer to Jane, speaking above the bickering pair. "Since we're always working with the Autobots, we decided to call ourselves Autohumes." He showed her the red, face-like patch sewed onto his left shoulder. "Well, actually it was Bluestreak that came up with the name, but once he started using it, it stuck."

Jane blinked at him then began to rub her forehead, feeling a migraine coming on. "Oie vey…"

Their argument finished (Brice had smacked them both on the back of the head and told them to behave, before stalking off to finish his cigarette near the car), Matthew walked back over and frowned. "You getting a headache? There's some Aleve at HQ."

"No, no," she shook her head, looking at the three, er, Autohumes. "I'm sorry, but it feels like I just walked into a bad 'Men in Black' spoof."

"Heh, get used to it." Zach glanced at the cruiser. "It'll get easier over time, trust me. The 'bots are good guys, you'll like them."

Amanda was worried. They'd been one officer short for nearly two months now. The government hated dealing with the Autohumes. Finding a good police officer for their team was a serious hassle. The government, Chief Hall, the local Sheriffs, and the Autobots had to approve. All forty of the currently employed officers had been handpicked for their skills. Zach was an accomplished sharp shooter and had eyes like a hawk. Matthew was incredible with technology and had a knack for fixing the HQs computers, not to mention he got along fabulously with the science-minded Autobots. Amanda had K9 training and was the most social out of the four, and was usually called when they ran into rowdy trespasses. This new woman, Jane, was supposed to have a good record from her old precinct on the east coast. She was in her late twenties, and had a look in her eyes Amanda recognized. She saw it often in scared and hurt animals. Jane was fighting her fight or flight instincts, and looked ready to bolt at any moment. Obviously, aliens had not been what she was thinking of when she took the job. She was absent mindedly spinning a white-gold wedding band around her ring finger.

"You're married, aren't ya?" Jane glanced down at the ring meaningfully.

"Yeah, I am," the new recruit shoved her hands in her pocket to keep herself from fiddling.

Amanda grinned widely and threw her arm around her shoulder. "Do you have any children?" Jane nodded. "Then you, my dear, are in the perfect department!" She pulled her away from the others. "This is the safest gig in Portland. There's, like, a zero percent chance of being shot!"

Jane paused. "Really?"

"Yeah," Amanda could see relief in her eyes. "The bots take a while to get used to, and you're going to have to survive the twins 'initiation,' but it really is a good job." She beamed. "Stick around a while, and you'll see!"

Brice extinguished his half-finished cigarette and sidled up beside his new officer. "Jane, no one can make you stay. There's a week-long clause on the contract, and you can leave if you're uncomfortable. But I've seen your record, and I would really like to have you as a member of our team."

She sighed, rubbing her forehead. "Alright, I'll give it a shot." She muttered. "Heck, we've already moved in. Might as well see what these Autobots are like." She flashed her new coworkers a smile. It was quickly returned.

"Great!" Matthew slapped her shoulder. "You want the grand tour?" Without waiting for an answer, he dragged her towards a large trailer set up against the mountain base, near the blast doors. Portland PD – Autobot Division was printed in foot-high letters on the white siding.

Brice leaned against the hood of the Datsun, arms folded across his chest. Amanda and Zach followed Matthew into the trailer, greeting the woman's hyper K9 companion on their way in. "Well, Prowl, what do you think?"

The car hummed in thought. "Her record is impressive. One speeding ticket pre-employment, several arrests, several drug busts, and no job-related casualties. Her husband is an English teacher at a nearby high school. Both have masters degrees, and have produced one offspring."

The sergeant rolled his eyes. "They have a kid, Prowl."

"That's what I said."

Authors Note: Alright, here's my second shot at writing Paint Chips. I'm a Police Science major, and in a few years I'll have my bachelors and soon after that a masters. I always wondered how the Autobots handled the local police forces, and this idea bloomed. I hope ya'll like it! Reviews are much appreciated, especially critics! I'm always looking to better my writing. Thanks to Sinead and my friend Tim for beta reading!

3 Ashana