Suspension
By lovelunarchron
There was too much blood.
He hadn't known the red of it could be so intense, so bright. It seeped out of Cress's stomach, covering—no, soaking—the butterfly dress she wore. Her little hands tried to cover up the hole he'd made with his knife, but it was no use. There was too much blood.
He had done this. Stabbed the girl he loved.
"Cress," he choked out from where he lay injured on the ground.
He wanted to go to her, to help her, to get her to a doctor. To take her in his arms and hold her. But Levana could take control of his body again and he could make her death even more painful. Because with all that blood, how could anything else but death be imminent?
He could only watch her die.
The tears that streamed down her face mirrored his own.
He hadn't told her.
And now it was too late. She would die thinking that he hadn't meant it. She didn't know that he'd never meant anything more in his life.
"I love you, Cress," he said, another sob escaping him with the words.
But her face was so pale where she lay and her eyes were getting that distant look that he'd seen in the net dramas she loved so much. She hadn't heard him. She still didn't know.
No, no, no….
A pair of feet appeared by her side and Thorne jerked his eyes up to a massive, hulking figure. One of Levana's mutants. Don't touch her, he wanted to scream. He would get up and risk Levana taking control of his body again. There was no way he was going to let Cress's last breath be taken by one of the wolf soldiers while he just laid there watching.
He struggled to his feet, pain exploding in his hand, but he bit it down.
"Get…away from her!" he yelled.
Where was the knife? Where was the gun? Where was Cinder? Why hadn't she ended it?
He didn't bother looking at the throne for an answer. The second he realized that his body was still his own, he dove at the soldier. He would claw his eyes out with his bloody fingers if that's what it took. The soldier deflected him easily but before Thorne could charge him again the soldier had him pinned.
Green eyes gleamed down at him. "It's me, Thorne. It's Wolf."
The shock of it hit him as his struggle dissolved under the soldier's firm grip.
If this was Wolf then—
Then they had—
"No," he whispered.
"We need to get help," said Wolf, releasing him.
A new determination came over him. Pushing aside his horror at the sight of her up close, Thorne covered Cress's hands with his own and pressed down. Her eyes now closed, he pushed hard to stave off the bleeding. "You're going to be okay, Cress. You're going to live."
Wolf lifted Cress up as easily as a feather while Thorne kept his hand pressed on her stomach. Her hands were so cold, too cold…
"Let go," said Wolf. "Find Scarlet. She's unconscious. I hid her in the hallway behind a statue. I'm going to run Cress to the med facility."
"What if they don't help?"
He growled. "I'll make them help."
Wolf sprinted out of the throne room with Cress cradled in his arms.
Thorne jumped up from his cot as soon as Kai entered the room. The after-effects of the anesthesia made him sway on his feet, but both Kai and the grumpy Lunar doctor reached for him at the same time. When they had forced him back down on the cot, he glared at Kai. "They won't let me see her!"
The doctor frowned at Thorne for the hundredth time, but addressed Kai instead of him. "Your Majesty, Mr. Thorne insists on seeing the Shell, but as I have told him several times already, she is currently in surgery. She will be moved to a suspension tank immediately following the procedure."
"Her name is Cress," Thorne spat back, gritting his teeth in frustration. "And that's Captain Thorne to you."
"I have also informed Captain Thorne that he must rest here until he is released from medical observation." He folded his hands behind his back. "We did all we could for him, but the two fingers were not salvageable. I've informed him of our policies, but he is…uncooperative. I had to use my gift to calm him down when the medication began to wear off."
"Why you—"
Kai held up his hands, and it was in that brief ellipse from his anger that Thorne noticed just how plainly the emperor wore his grief. Thorne had never seen him look so disheveled, with his hair sticking straight up, his puffy eyes rimmed with red, and his coronation clothes more rumpled than the military uniforms on the Rampion.
"No using glamour on the patients," he said sternly. Thorne began to gloat but Kai cut him off. "Restraints are always an option, though."
Thorne's jaw dropped. The traitor.
"Thank you for your work," Kai said to the doctor. "I would like to speak to the patient alone."
The doctor, still frowning, attempted a bow, but it was clear that it was forced. He exited the room like he couldn't get out of there fast enough.
"Good to see you too," said Thorne sourly.
Kai took a seat next to Thorne on his cot. "You heard the doctor. You need to rest."
"I can rest in the room where they'll put Cress when she gets out of surgery."
He hated being in here, with the plain walls and the sterile equipment. The crinkling noise the operating table paper made reminded him of Dr. Erland. Reminded him of Cress.
"I feel so useless," said Kai, dragging a hand down his face. "They won't let me see Cinder either."
The lump in Thorne's throat that he had replaced with anger threatened to surface again, so he closed his eyes and counted to ten. When he opened them, Kai was hunched over his knees, resting his head in his palms in total defeat.
"They're both going to be fine," he said, a little too firmly.
Kai glanced up. "I just can't get the image of her with that knife in her heart out of my mind."
"At least you weren't the one who plunged it in there."
"We've been through this. It's not your fault."
"Tell that to my nightmares."
"Is that why you refuse to sleep?"
Thorne stared at the wall. He wouldn't sleep because he needed to see for himself that Cress was still alive. Kai had to understand that. Thorne had been there when Cinder had been carried out of the throne room. She had been in just as bad shape as Cress had been. Maybe even worse, depending on whether or not it was her natural or synthetic parts that had been injured.
His girl and his best friend. Both fighting for their lives.
"You're the King of Luna now, right?"
"Not technically, but—"
"Whatever. You're in control. You figure out a way for me to see Cress. I'm going to be in that room when she gets put in the suspension tank. And there's going to be a cot waiting there for me so that I can come and go as I please."
Sighing, Kai got up from the cot. "I'll get you a chair. You're sleeping in your own room at night. You need to rest."
Thorne threw up his hands in frustration. His right hand throbbed under his new cast and he bit back a curse. He should have accepted more pain killers, but he didn't want to be too drugged up and miss anything. Any news at all could help to put him more at ease.
"It's a suite," Kai added, as if that could make it more tempting.
It sort of did.
"Fine," Thorne grumbled. "Just get me in that room."
Kai nodded and began to walk to the door. He paused with his hand over the keypad and looked back over his shoulder at Thorne. "You should be celebrating. You're officially pardoned in the Eastern Commonwealth, Carswell Thorne."
He placed his casted hand on the clear tank. Something about using that hand over his uninjured one made him feel just the tiniest bit less horrible.
She had shot him.
He had stabbed her.
It wasn't any consolation at all, but it connected them—an injury for an injury. If only it could have been the other way around.
He had shot her.
She had stabbed him.
She would have gotten off with two missing fingers and annoying doctors that fussed over whether or not it was aesthetically pleasing to recommend a cybernetic operation now that they no longer had a vain, psycho queen on the throne.
He would be in the tank.
Sighing, he turned away from her. He'd never bothered to dwell on what if's before he'd met Cress. This was territory he was completely unfamiliar with. He didn't appreciate the way it tore his gut apart.
Thorne had wished over and over to be able to see Cress while he was blind. Once he'd gotten his sight back, he'd caught himself staring at her and then quickly looking away when someone noticed him stealing moments in which he could just observe her.
Now he could stare at her all he wanted.
This was not the scenario he'd imagined.
Still, he studied her. Even beneath the glass and surrounded by what he could only describe as goop, she was so beautiful.
He liked her freckles. There were twenty-seven of them, to be exact.
Not that he'd counted.
"If you die, then you won't even get to fulfill your two greatest desires. Aha! You think I don't know your greatest desires? You're wrong. I pay attention."
He held a finger up. "One. You want to see Earth. Explore its beauty. Tell me I'm wrong. You can't, because that is ultimately one of your greatest desires. I might have been blind, but I know how much your jaw dropped at the sight of that forsaken desert. Remember what I said, Cress? 'If this is how you feel about a desert, I can't wait until you see your first real tree. Your mind will explode.' You think those lemon trees in Kufrah were a big deal?"
He clicked his tongue.
"Imagine forests, Cress. Forests that swallow you up the second you step inside because the trees are hundreds of years old and so tall you can't even see the top. You probably think you've researched those forests with Little Cress and know everything there is about them. But that's nothing compared to being there, Cress, and having them tower over you. And the wildlife. You're going to freak out when you see it all.
"It's not just forests either, but mountains, and…and water! Oh my stars, Cress, don't even think about comparing crappy Artemisia Lake to anything we have on Earth." He huffed. "Beside the fact that I nearly drowned in it, it's just a ridiculous excuse for a body of water. I'm going to take you to the Caribbean where I did some of my military training. Actually, it's where I stole the Rampion. You would already know that of course, with all the research you did. But aces, Cress. Forget the forests. When you see how clear the ocean is in the Caribbean, that's when you're going to freak out. No, let's be honest, you're probably just going to freak out one hundred percent of the time."
Thorne held up a second finger on his casted hand. It was still unnatural, but it was enough to drive the point home. "Two. Your second greatest desire is to be with me. How do I know this? Well, you've been pretty obvious about it, darling. Not that I can blame you. But if you just stay here all comatose you're never going to be able to kiss this handsome face again."
His face fell and he peered at Cress in the tank. She was still unmoving, the steady beep beep of her vitals the only response to his monologue. His voice dropped to a whisper. "I know I'm not everything you thought I was when you met me. But I can change, Cress. I can be a better man. You make me want to be a better man. If you live, I can show you that. Please."
"I meant it, okay? I am in love with you. In love! LOVE! Do you hear me? L-O-V-E! As in, I don't want to be with anyone else love. As in, I'll watch all the stupid net dramas you want as long as you'll be with me love. So you have to live. Seriously. You're not dying until I get to tell you that."
Thorne drew an ace from the deck and threw it down. "Ha-ha! Top that."
The smugness of his oncoming victory was already rolling off of him. His luck had been unbelievable during this game of Royals. If only he could win like this during games where univs were at stake.
Cress stayed stoic as usual despite his taunting.
"I see you've been working on your poker face. But this is Royals, darling, and you can't bluff your way out of this."
He drew another card and added it to her pile of cards. He flipped it over to reveal a ten of spades. There was no way she was going to beat his hand this round even if she got an ace herself.
"Now Crescent, you're going to have to do better than that. I know you kept beating Iko on the Rampion because you're a genius, but you're going to have to step up your game if you want to beat me." He glanced at Cress again, making sure to flash her a cocky grin. "What's that? You're nervous because it's your first time playing a criminal mastermind? I know, I know, I have that effect on people."
He dealt two more rounds and was so close to winning he could smell it.
"Thorne, it's time for dinner."
Thorne looked up from the card game. He hadn't even noticed Scarlet come in. "No can do. I'm winning this game by a landslide."
Scarlet sighed and approached the makeshift table he'd made out of the little metal stand that usually held surgical tools. She flipped a card over. "Cress would have won this round, though."
"No way, let me see that."
Scarlet held the card hostage. Just enough out of his reach that he'd have to get up if he wanted it. Stubborn little thing she was.
"I'm sorry that I never got to meet her."
Thorne rubbed his palms over his knees, the cast scraping against his right pant leg. Scarlet had only seen Cress on the D-COMM chip. He thought the two of them would probably hit it off fairly well once they got to know each other. They had polar opposite personalities, but then again, his personality was rather different than Cress's too, and they got along just fine. "You'd like her."
"That's what everyone keeps telling me. Ze'ev, Kai, and Iko are all quite fond of her."
"It's hard not to be."
"And I heard—well, I'd already assumed by how you behaved at Maha's—you like her, don't you?"
Thorne studied Cress's face for the millionth time. It was serene. Peaceful. Not like the last time he'd seen her awake and struggling to stay alive. "Yeah."
Scarlet took a seat on the arm of Thorne's chair. She watched Cress too, for a while, until she nudged Thorne. "I didn't think you'd be the type to settle for one girl."
It was hard to keep the slump out of his shoulders. "That's probably what she still thinks too."
"I thought discouraged wasn't in your vocabulary."
He let out a dry laugh. Getting Scarlet, Iko, and Winter to stop whining about all the problems they had faced seemed like a lifetime ago. That was before he'd even been reunited with Cress. Before they'd kissed…
"I didn't clarify my feelings," was all he managed to say. All he wanted to say about the topic at the moment.
Scarlet stood and held out her hand. "You'll get that opportunity. Cress is going to be okay."
He looked up at her hopefully.
"Now come eat. Cinder's going to be out of her cybernetic surgery in a few hours. I know you'll want to visit her once she's awake."
Thorne took a look at his cards, at Cress, at Scarlet. Then he grabbed her hand and let her pull him to his feet.
Thorne burst through the door, a new spring in his step. The sterile smell didn't even bother him like it usually did when he first entered Cress's room each time. Today was a day for celebrating.
"Cinder is awake!" he said, jogging to the tank. "I just spent some time with her in her room. Practically had to pry Kai away from her. She's doing pretty well, all things considered. Tired, of course, but that's to be expected. She wasn't too tired to be her usual sarcastic self, though.
"She's going to come say hi when she's able to move a little more easily on her own. I told her that your vitals are stable now, so maybe you'll even be out of suspension before she has a chance to stop by! But did you see how often the others visited? It's not just me who wants you to be okay. You have friends who care about you, Cress."
He grinned and gave Cress two thumbs up. It turned into one thumb up and a cast in the air. Oh well.
"So the crew's all here now. We're just waiting on you."
He pressed his face to the glass. "I'm sorry I flirted with Iko and Cinder, okay? I was stupid."
Thorne sat down in front of the tank. He was tired of the chair, tired of the makeshift table, tired of the room. The floor wasn't anything new either. There were fifty-four tiles exactly, if he didn't count the two that had begun to erode in the corner behind the door.
He leaned back on his elbows to get a good look at Cress. Maybe this would be the last time he would see her in this state. He could only hope it would be. That's what he hoped each time he visited her, anyway.
It was getting late. It had taken him two hours to craft his speech and then hone it to the point of perfection. He hadn't even noticed how much he'd been pacing, but this was the first time he'd given a real declaration of love, not a made up one, so a little pacing was overdue.
"So what did you think of my speech, Cress? My plan? Do you think you're still in love with me?"
His portscreen chimed in the middle of his meeting with President Vargas. He wasn't usually one to be embarrassed, but of all the times he should be embarrassed, this was one of them. It wasn't every day that the President of the American Republic requested his presence.
To talk to him—Carswell Thorne.
About his freedom.
And the Rampion.
He laughed awkwardly and unclipped his port from his belt. "Sorry about that," he said, tapping the screen to put it on silent. "I can't believe—"
He froze.
It was a comm from Scarlet.
Cress was awake.
Note: The plot belongs to Marissa Meyer, as well as the italicized quotes. Check out the incredible artwork by tumblr user Moon-Mirage that now serves as the cover pic for this fic!