Disclaimer : I do not own DRRR!, Tsukishima or Hachimenroppi. ;w;
note : Well, this is my very first DRRR! story. So I hope it won't be too awful... As English is not my native language, if you see something horrible, please tell me. Thank you. :D
[ I will always be here if you need, Roppi-san. ]
Hachimenroppi sighed and threw his phone on the other side of the bed. Another wasted day. And another day spent with Tsukishima's naïve idiocies. It was… frustrating. Yes, frustrating. Roppi knew he was supposed to be asocial and hating of all humans but he couldn't help but forget this side of his personality when he was with the blonde. Well, not exactly. He was still asocial and kind of blunt. But over the time he came to think that there was a person he didn't hate. And this person wasn't even from his family ! And that was very upsetting for Roppi.
« You will be here is that it ? Stop lying fucking moron. I know you'll eventually leave me… » the raven muttered to an imaginary Tsukishima. « Everybody always leave me… It's a chance the therapy was successful. »
He was referring to the last two years when he was forced by his cousins, Izaya and Psyche, to enter a center that was specialized in therapies for depressive and suicidal persons. For a long moment, almost half of the year, Roppi directed his anger and his hate towards these traitors who locked him away everything. But as the time ran and as the therapy started to work, Roppi finally realized the men didn't intend to hurt him, at the contrary. And as surprising as it may be, Izaya even came to visit him and asked for news, a genuine worried frown on his face. Maybe that guy simply had a hard time dealing with his feelings and how to show it, Roppi thought after the third time the informant had come.
Anyway, the therapy had worked and Roppi had left the center after one and half year, fully cured from his self-harm habits and suicidal thoughts. Though he remained gloomy, lonely and deeply misanthrop. But this simply was his character and no doctors or drugs may change that… And even if he was reluctant to admit it, this therapy also managed to give him a more human side. As he understood that not all the human would try to harm him, he somewhat opened up to the world and mainly to the few persons who remained willing to talk to him after almost two years without contact -the only news he gave were transmitted by Psyche or Izaya.
And he bitterly saw that besides his cousins and Psyche's boyfriend the only person who still tried to speak with him was Tsukishima, Shizuo's brother. Of course the clumsy blonde was very friendly, optimistic and always happy and that's exactly why Hachimenroppi hated him. He always felt tiny and insignificant everytime the other man was with him, and it was not about their respective height. It was simply that Tsuki was almost glowing and sparkling. And Roppi felt threatened by this bright aura, almost like if he could be hurt by so much positiveness at once.
He has tried to stay away from him and use only his cellphone to communicate, but it was pointless. The younger always found a way to come back, either to bring something for one of their relatives, to borrow or give back a book or simply to say hello. Tsuki always, always came back to Roppi and stood there, smiling shyly, hiding half of his visage in his scarf. So Roppi gave up. Since he could do nothing to keep himself far from the blonde, he simply let he be and do whatever he wanted to. And little by little, the two of them grew closer and one day, Roppi caught himself thinking that Tsuki was late on his usual planning. And this angered the brunette. A lot. He hated anything that could be related to humans. He really hated it. He didn't even allow Psyche to hug him because it felt so irritating that the last time the singer did it, he brutally met the coffee table with his shoulder. Roppi didn't even wanted to hurt him, he reacted instinctly. He hated this kind of things. Yet he was now thinking about the Heiwajima and about what he could do tomorrow while he'd be waiting for him to come to visit him.
« Fuck you ! »
A pillow learnt how to fly before crashing against the door of the bedroom and Roppi turned to his back. He stared at his ceiling mentally asking himself how pathetic he could be before going insane. He thought to Tsuki's last message. 'I will be here for you if you need' … Roppi smirked. Was is true ? What if the blonde found a reason to hate him and abandon him as well ? It was a very stupid and hurtful idea, but Roppi decided to test it anyway. He grabbed his phone and quickly wrote a message.
[ Tsukishima, I think I have a problem… I need to talk to you asap. ]
Sent. The Orihara felt his chest heavier than usual as he looked at his phone saying Tsuki received the message. His answer was quick.
[ What is it ? Do you want me to come at your place ? ]
[ I'd like, yes. Don't bother yourself with that though. Come when you can. ]
[ I can be there in ten minutes if you ask me to. ]
[ Thank you. ]
Ten minutes. Hachimenroppi had only ten tiny minutes left to think how to get through this mess. He went to his living room and sat on his couch, thinking hardly. He already had a vague idea of the thing, but he was unsure if the blonde would understand or not. Ah, anyway, he was so dense he wouldn't get the obvious and that, even if someone was yelling it to him…
Roppi agreed with himself, sure that his plan was perfect. After all, everything always went as he wanted to -though mostly because he actually never planned anything, so the rare times he decided something, it miraculously worked, but that was another thing he would never admit either.
The doorbell rang once. Twice. At the third time, Roppi left his couch and walked to the door, careful of looking depressed enough to make the blonde worry. And it didn't fail. As soon as he opened the door, Tsuki frowned, wondering what could have happen to his friend. And mainly, what could be so important to ask him to come when it was almost midnight.
The blonde followed the raven inside the flat and sat on the couch as asked to. He barely dared to look at his friend, already scared of what he may hear. He hoped he didn't come back to self-harm. Please no ! Tsuki shivered at the only thoughts of the scars on the other's arms.
« Tsukishima, you are talented for loving, right ?
- L-love ? What do you mean, Roppi-san ?
- I mean, you know how it feels when you love someone. Correct ?
- W-well… Yes. Why ?
- Tell me. Tell me how does it feel when you love someone. How you react when you see the person you love. What you think… Everything you can teach me about it. »
Tsuki choked, understanding that Roppi was asking him about feelings. That meant the man loved someone, right ? And maybe he was in love… This idea made Tsuki blush. He imagined Roppi in the arms of someone, looking at this person and even… kissing. The image was too upsetting for the young man who shook his head, wishing for it to disappear. He gathered his ideas and looked at Roppi who was staring at him, the same anxious expression still on his visage. Obviously, he waited an answer. Tsuki cleared his throat as he tried to thing straight.
« W-well… I think… You… You think about this person a lot. More than everybody else… You want to talk to them and see them and hear them… And when you're with this person you feel good. A bit flustered and nervous, but definitely good, as if you were calmed by their presence… And your heart beats harder and faster. Maybe, if you are timid, you blush. And you are scared to say something weird because you are too nervous, but it's ok because you know this person will not be mean or anything… »
Tsuki sighed briefly, quite unsure of what he said. Of course Roppi asked to describe what he felt, but he didn't know if this could apply to anybody else. He looked away before hearing a soft chuckle. He glanced at Roppi who was hiding his mouth with his hands. He looked quite amused.
« By any chance Tsukishima, did you just portrayed yourself ~ ? » he laughed.
The blonde only blushed. He didn't predicted this reaction.
« W-well… I… That's what I feel when I…
- When you're in love ? Correct ? So it means you're in love with someone ~ Is it right ?
- Y-yes… »
Tsuki blushed even harder if even it was possible and did his best to not stare at Roppi's grin.
« So, tell me Tsukishima ~ If I feel like what you described, does it mean I am in love as well ? »
The blonde quickly turned his head to look at Roppi, making his neck ache because of the sudden movement. But he didn't care. He just wanted to verify what he heard. Roppi, in love ? So earlier, he wasn't imagining things !? For some reason, this idea made his heart ache. He gulped difficultly, still staring at the raven.
« R-Roppi-san… You mean… You…
- I…» he paused for a second. « I think I am in love.
- Oh… »
Tsuki didn't find a something interesting to answer. All he could think about was that Roppi was leavnig him behind. And it hurt him. But he did his best to forget these thoughts and instead try to encourage his friend. After all, it was extremely rare that Roppi talked about his feeling and it was actually the very first time he even mentionned the fact he could love someone. And Tsuki wanted to encourage him, no matter what he could feel himself. He brought a shy smile on his lips and look again at the other who never stopped to stare at him.
« I… I think it's great… Because Roppi-san doesn't love a lot of persons. So if you find someone you really love, it's nice ! I… I am happy you do…
- Though you don't look really happy. Why is that ? » Roppi asked as he tilted his head on the side, using a somewhat cute expression that made Tsuki blush even more.
« N-no ! That's not it ! Of course I… I am happy that Roppi-san found someone to love. It's good for you, Roppi-san… And this person is very lucky, you know. He…
- He ? » the brunette giggled. « Tsukishima ~ Who told you it was a he ? »
Tsuki only burried his face in his scarf, mumbling a vague apology. So… Roppi was in love with a girl ? Two of the things that Tsuki refused to imagine were mixed together. He gathered all his courage to continue to speak instead of running away as he wished to.
« Sorry… I-I am surprised… But, may I ask how she is ?
- Oh, yes ~ » Roppi clapped in his hands, looking somewhat pleased. He hummed for some seconds before nodding. « Well, you see. It's a very nice and gentle person… Very patient too. And never asking for stupid things or anything… She never wants me to be someone else and she smiles everytime she sees me… Also, she is as bright and delicate as the moon. And I wish I could tell her that. But I'm not sure she would accept my feelings… You see, I feel nice when she is with me and I like talking about very different things… But I'm not sure she would be willing to share these feelings of mine…
- Then she is an idiot. » Tsuki snapped, not realizing what he was saying.
« I beg your pardon ?
- S-Sorry. I didn't mean to insult her ! It's just… I-I think Roppi-san is someone very… interesting and smart. And it feels great to be your friend… And I think that if someone ever rejects you, then this person is an idiot. »
Tsuki looked at his feet, not really willing to meet the brunette's eyes. This only made Roppi smirk. For now, everything went according to his prediction. And it was pretty amusing. He erased his grin and put a light smile on his lips before sitting closer to Tsuki. He put a hand on the blonde shoulder and smiled.
« Because you will always be by my side, right ? »
Tsuki nodded shyly. Why was the other asking tha… Tsuki's mind went blank when Roppi slid his arms around his neck and hugged him tightly.
« Thank you Tsukishima. It feels relieving to have you as friend. » he whispered in the other's ear.
Tsuki hesitated for a second before wrapping an arm around the older's waist and hugging back. As far as he remembered, it was the very first time that Roppi dared show any mark of affection. And it was as surprising as great. Hugging the raven felt nice…
Roppi cringed when he felt Tsuki hugging him back. That was something he didn't plan. Being forced to hug someone was definitely something he didn't liked, even if Tsuki's hug was much more gentle and pleasant than Psyche's sudden and almost violent ones… Happily for him, Tsuki was awfully shy and let him go kinda quickly. Roppi mentally thanked him for that and pulled away as slowly as he could. He did his best to look into Tsuki's eyes and smile.
« Thank you for being my friend Tsukishima. »
Tsuki felt his heart skip a beat when he hear Roppi insisting on the word 'friend'. Was it what it felt when we were friendzoned ? Whether it was that or not, Tsuki didn't like it. It hurt too much !
« Did you see the hour ? There's no way I let you go back home when it's so late. You can use the second room, but don't even think to leave this place. »
Tsuki looked at Roppi who was now in front of his window, glancing at his watch. The fact the raven was using this watch made Tsuki smile. It was a gift the blonde made to his friend when he left the clinic. He pretended that if Roppi was really cured, he would be able to use look at his wrist everyday without feeling bad. And Roppi accepted the gift. He even wore it with the dial on the intern side of his wrist, where his scars were. For Tsuki, it meant a lot and he was proud of his friend. He realized how selfish he had been. Of course Roppi couldn't be in love with him, nobody would be able to fall in love with an airhead who messed with everything and was as clumsy as forgetful. Even his brother couldn't stand him, only Kasuka could, but Kasuka surprisingly managed to accept everybody anyway… But if his one and only friend was in love, it was his duty to support him ! Even more when the said friend was Orihara Hachimenroppi. It was quite a miracle for him to love someone, so if he didn't have any support, he'd probably finish even more lonely and gloomy.
Tsuki yelped when he felt something falling on his head. He took what suddenly obscured his vision -a large red hoodie and the bottom of pajama. Roppi was standing in front of him, waiting for a reaction. When the blonde nodded at him, he sighed.
« I don't know where the top is. I guess I lost it. Or most probably you lost it… Anyway, that idiot Izaya left this thing the last time he came. And I hate it. It's awfully large and not comfortable at all. So I thought maybe it'd be your size. If it's not, you'll have to sleep barechest. » he told Tsuki who looked at the size.
« I think it should be fine. Thank you Roppi-san.
- Yeah. Do you want to use the bathroom now or later in the morning ?
- Wh-whatever is fine with you.
- Then I suggest you to go to sleep now. I'll let enough hot water for you tomorrow. Okay ?
- Alright. »
Tsuki stood up and looked at Roppi who was walking to his bathroom, carelessly dropping his shirt on the floor before abandonning his pants. Aware that staring at the man could bring an awkward situation, Tsuki rushed to the room and changed before going to bed and falling asleep.
Haha ! And this is where I explain how my mind works... I'm sorry if this was confusing sometimes, but my vocabulary is fairly poor and I try my best with translators and dictionaries to use synonyms and stuff, but there are times when I use the same kind of things again and again. I apologize. Really. ;w;
And then I want to explain why Roppi's refusing to let Tsuki go. I simply meant that they talk for a moment, somewhat longer than expected, and when Roppi gets bored of playing (maybe you can see it as he changes his way of speaking) he looks at his watch and see it's pretty late / early (depending if you talk about night or morning). That's why he tells Tsuki to stay here even if the blonde didn't mention this fact even once... Actually, that's very simple and I didn't think it could be confusing for someone. If it was, I'm very sorry. T^T
But in any case, thank you for reading ! I hope it wasn't too bad ! :3