The blonde felt sick she ran to the bathroom and threw up. She started crying "I can't do this I have to end this" she cried "I've only just moved here and I'm knocked up I can't do this" she cried.
Fin saw her running so did liv she got up and followed she knocked in the bathroom door "Amanda is everything alright?" She asked at the door. The blonde detective wiped her face "yeah must of ate something that didn't agree with me, I'm fine" she yelled before throwing up again.
Fin didn't know much about his new partner other than captain told him to keep an eye on her.
"I'm two minutes away from calling a bus are you sure your ok?" There was no answer. Black spots appeared in the blondes eyes she only just managed to unlock the door. Liv opened the door to see the blonde unconscious "fin get a bus!" Olivia yelled fin came up to them "whoa is she ok?" Olivia was taking her pulse.
Cragen had seen this unfold but when he heard them calling for a bus he dashed to his new detective "is everything alright?" "She's blacked out, I'm not sure she was throwing up" Olivia explained Cragen nodded "don't move her and let me deal with the EMT's" fin looked confused but before he could asked questions the EMT's came in "be careful she is still recovering" Cragen yelled when they pulled the blonde from the floor. Fin looked at liv she shrugged they looked to nick who did the same.
"I'm riding with her" Cragen said following the EMTs out "Munch your in charge" he dashed out.
The blonde came round everything hurt "Amanda you lost conciseness you were throwing up but you are in the hospital the baby is fine" Cragen assured "I don't think I can do this!" The blonde started crying "you can you have options" he assured "but I can't do this every time I touch it, it reminds me of him. Every time I pull a shirt on it reminds me of him" she sobbed "you know I'll support whatever decision you make" the blonde stopped crying for a moment "they don't know do they?!" she said panicked "No the team don't know" "I think fin and liv have been starting to notice though" she started sobbing again "you don't have to tell them" the blonde put her head down, Cragen stroked her hair.
"Fin!" Liv yelled fin dashed over to the computer screen "what?!" He looked at the screen "oh god" "held captive for a year rescued 2 months ago by her partner" fin read "but she is so happy" he added "she hides it well, look she has changed her hair style, colour and well everything she can "god I hope she is ok" fin said.
The blonde was allowed to leave the hospital "I need to grab some vitamins out of my desk" he nodded "I'll drive you there and then your going home" she nodded "thanks." They arrived at the precinct the blonde dashed in fin came over to her with Olivia "are you alright?" They could see she had been crying "yeah I'm good captain gave me the day off I just needed to grab these" she said shaking the bottle fin and Olivia read the label "first trimester" she realised and quickly and hid them in her pocket. Liv put an arm around her "if you need to talk" the blonde quickly shrugged her off "I'm fine" she said slightly angrier then intended.
She left and went home Cragen dropped her off "thanks for everything" she said getting out the car "let me know if you need anything" "will do."
The blonde walked straight into her apartment and straight into the bathroom she had felt the need to cut all day. She picked up the razor and took it apart she pushed the top of her trousers down and drew lines across her hip. She could feel the tension leaving her body. There was a knock at the door "shit!" She quickly placed a wad of tissue over it and pulled her trousers up. She shuffled to the door and opened it "Amanda I'm sorry if I upset you" Olivia said standing in the door way "I don't know what you mean" she said inviting the brunet into the apartment. "Amanda you had pregnancy vitamins and you were throwing up" "would you like a coffee?" The blonde asked, Olivia grabbed her wrists "Amanda talk to me! I know we only met last week but I'm here for you and I'm worried" "milk? sugar?" "Amanda!" The blonde shook off Olivia "take it your having milk and sugar" she said getting two cups. "Amanda talk to me! We know you we're abducted" the blonde dropped the cup her demeanour changed more angry yet scared "leave it!" The blonde yelled.
The tissue was obviously not enough for how deep she had cut as the blood started coming through. "Amanda your hip" Olivia rushed to her "what part of leave it!" "Amanda please I'm begging you tell me what is going on?" The blonde went into the bathroom and hid her blade and razors and placed a dressing over it. She looked at herself in the mirror "this is all your fault" she said looking at her stomach. She left the bathroom.
Olivia caught her arms "Amanda! We know you we're taken!" She repeated "alright! fine! What do you want me to say I lived in a basement for a year food was a reward! I was punished for the littlest of things and my partner found me! Is that what you wanted to hear" she started crying Olivia held her "Amanda are you pregnant?" The sobbing blonde nodded "aw Amanda you could of told us" Olivia slid them to the floor the blondes dressing had come off a little Olivia looked at it "did you do these?" The sobbing blonde nodded "Amanda" she tried to sooth but it came out disappointed "you must think I'm pathetic" "I don't, no one, does how far along are you?" "About three months but I can't keep it and I can't abort it" "shhhhh" Olivia soothed.
The blonde cried till she fell asleep Olivia put her to bed "your even showing" she whispered putting the cover over the blonde. She sat in the sitting room till the blonde awoke.
The blonde awoke and walked out in her sitting room and saw Olivia "that wasn't a dream was it? I told you everything" Olivia nodded "I won't tell anyone" "guess you should know Cragen asked me to work for him when I was in the hospital after it happened said the team would protect me" "we will" "you didn't tell anyone did you?" She shook her head "but I think you should at least tell fin he is worried" the blonde nodded "well I'm going to show soon" "I'm here all the way no matter what you decide" the blonde nodded "I've looked into abortion, adoption, safe havens but I don't know if I can do any of that, but I can't raise it, look at me I'm a mess but I don't know if I can give it away, what if I hate it!" Olivia made the blonde a drink "you have 6 months, half a year to decided Amanda" the blonde walked up to Olivia "will you take it" Olivia was shocked "A-amanda" "I'm serious I don't want it and if you take it maybe I could see it if I wanted. I know about Calvin" the blonde had thought about this idea since learning about Calvin "only if your sure and you can see the baby any time you want" "I'm not calling it a baby it is an it" Olivia nodded "then yes I'll take it" the blonde smiled.
Fin came over a little later the brunet had convinced the blonde to tell him "Amanda are you okay?" She nodded "but I need to tell you something" he nodded "I am pregnant 3 months and it is my captors baby" fin nodded "you could of told me" he said taking her hand "but I don't want it, I can't keep it so when it is delivered Olivia is taking it" fin looked to Olivia who nodded.
After fin left Olivia looked at the blonde "let me sort your hip manda please?" The blonde reluctantly nodded, they went into the bathroom Amanda stood with the side of her trousers pushed down "Amanda isn't the first time you have done this is it?" She shook her head. Olivia got the first aid box and cleaned up the wounds the blonde hissed "I'm sorry" Olivia said trying to be quick she placed a neat bandage over "all done, please don't do this again if you feel the need tell me" the blonde nodded.
They walked back into the living room "will you stay tonight?" She asked the brunet nodded "of course."
The months past the blonde was on desk duty till she was put on leave. Olivia had drawn up adoption papers as the blonde asked and everything was signed and ready to go.
"Olivia it's time" the text read. Olivia rushed to the hospital and got there just in time to witness the birth of their daughter they named Emmy.
The blonde held the baby for a few moments before passing it to Olivia "time to meet your mommy" she said as Olivia took the baby. Olivia was close to tears someone gave her a baby, her co-worker gave her a baby.
The years past at first Amanda couldn't see anything of her captor in Emmy's face but as she grew she could see his nose and his chin but that was all thank goodness.
"Manda! Manda! Look I got an A+ for my reading" the little girl said running to her from across the precinct floor. "Well done sweetie" the blonde said picking the little girl up and fussing over her.
It still hurt her to see the little girl, sadly the beautiful little blonde was still a painful reminder of what happened to her.
Olivia loved the little girl, Emmy was her world.
My friend's idea hope you all liked it! Not going to mark as complete we have an idea for another chapter in the future.