Tick Tick Tomorrow
Quinn Fabray sat studying herself in the vertical mirror perched up against the door to Finn's room. She had locked the door, even though both Finn and his mom were out and leaving her alone in the house. Mrs. Hudson was still at work and Finn himself had left the house to "clear his head" after they had returned home from sectionals. Though he didn't say it, Quinn knew that it was time for her to leave. She knew that Finn would never ask her to leave because he still cared for the baby that wasn't his. So as soon as they'd gotten to his house, he let Quinn out of Mr. Schuester's car without a word and drove off into the night.
The young girl couldn't remove her eyes from the reflection staring back at her from the clear glass of the mirror. It wasn't because she was beautiful; Quinn knew that, she'd been told it countless times before. She couldn't stop staring at the bump that was slowly but surely becoming more visible underneath the white babydoll top that had been the day's choice of wardrobe.
When had Quinn's life suddenly gone to hell? When had she been landed with this a steadily growing belly, two boys who pretty much hated her because she had played them both, and gone from 'Queen of High School' to 'Queen of Morning Sickness and Swollen Ankles'?
Quinn had hoped to God that her parents would be somewhat understanding of her situation and not kick her to the curb like they did. Looking back when she slept in Finn's bed and wondered just how the 6'3'' boy managed to fit here, she laughed bitterly. Her parents had only shown "love and support" whenever she was helping them keep up their appearance as the perfect Fabray family. As soon as she had marred that image by becoming pregnant, they had to throw her out, pretend as if she'd never exist. Quinn and her future child couldn't be a problem if they were no longer part of the family.
And Puck? Well, Quinn had discovered that no matter how much Puck said he refused to be like his own douche bag father, he wouldn't change and mature like he needed to. And Quinn didn't want her baby to deal with that, even if he was the baby's own father. Time after time, Quinn had given Puck the chances that he begged and pleaded for, saying that he'd change. But he never did. He was still screwing a different girl every week, not to mention the cougars on the side from his pool cleaning job.
She scoffed and blinked rapidly as tears began to fill her eyes. Thinking about what would happen when the baby got here hurt the most. She wouldn't come into a warm and loving family like Quinn wanted. She wouldn't have a mother and a father who were married, well off with jobs, and owned a home that they could raise her together in. What was Quinn's baby getting? A mother who could barely take care of herself, someone else's house and a childhood full of struggles, Quinn was sure of it.
Of course, the baby could have that. But only if Quinn gave it up for adoption. Since Mr. Schue had found out that his wife had been lying to him about being pregnant, that option was gone. Quinn knew that there had to be a loving, stable couple who could give her child what it needed. The problem is that she didn't know if she'd be strong enough to hand her baby over when that time came. She'd thought it through numerous times. On one side, she'd gain a companion, someone who would hopefully love her as much as she loved them. Quinn wasn't an idiot though. Babies needed more than love. Babies needed clothes, diapers, formula, and a place to sleep. So many things that Quinn couldn't give. So on the other side, her baby would have all of those things, and love. But the people who were going to love it weren't the girl who carried it and grown to love it for 9 months in her womb.
It was a lose-lose situation.
A sob tore from Quinn's throat. Never had she cried so hard. Not even after her parents had first kicked her out, or after Rachel Berry had blown her lie wide open for all of Glee to see. She cried for herself, she cried for Finn, she cried for Puck, she cried for herself, and she cried for the baby that was resting inside of her. The sobs bordered on hysterical and the noise rang in her ears as her entire body shook and heaved as she let it all go. Every single emotion that had been running through her for the past few months- all of the anger, the disbelief, the disappoint, the fright, the sadness, and the loneliness- was released from her through her tears.
Finally, after three or four minutes of it, Quinn was able to regain control of herself again. Her eyes found her reflection in the mirror. Her face was red and blotchy, glistening with tears. Her full bottom lip had visible bite marks where she had bit it hard to keep herself from screaming. It was all too overwhelming, so overwhelming that it exhausted her. And Quinn was already so tired.
At this point, there was nothing else she could do. Puck had agreed to take her in "for as long as she needed." Quinn rolled her eyes at this. Finn had said that, too. Of course, she hadn't been lying to Finn about the being the father of her child, but she hadn't treated Puck very fairly either. She figured it'd only be a matter of time before that arrangement fell through, too. And even if she could stay at Puck's until the baby came, then what would happen afterwards? She surely wouldn't go back to her parents. Knowing them, they would probably welcome her back with open arms once they saw that she no longer had the baby. They didn't deserve to have her back, not after they abandoned her when she needed them the most.
So what would she do?
What she's been doing since she first gasped as the little pink plus sign came up on the pregnancy test she took: wait for the future to swallow her whole, because that's the only thing she could do.