Rental Places Are Evil

By Shyro Foxfeather

……

"I thought all zombies had to be dead?"

"Apparently not. See, it says so right here." Cyborg pointed down at the movie cover. "Night of the living dead right here in the summary."

"So they're undead or living…dead?" Beast Boy murmured.

"I told you! They're alive just… decaying. Ya' know, when in The Slayers movie all the townsfolk just…melted. They were alive and then they became dead."

"They were still walking though! They were undead in that movie!"

"I suppose it doesn't matter." Interrupted Robin. "Joyrock turned them all into souls didn't he? They were dead."

"Yeah. Zombies didn't play a very big role in that one." BB agreed.

Starfire watched from across the rental shack. "They are debating about corpses again." She stated with a perturbed look as she flicked through the movies.

"Yes, they do that often." Mulled Raven as she ignored the videos entirely.

"I wonder…" Starfire began, "Have they ever exercised their skills by choosing a different plot? One not involved with the deceased?"

"I don't think so." Raven muttered.

Starfire wandered around the aisle a bit more before freezing at the sight before her. "Raven?"

Raven walked up next to her a blinked. And blinked again. This section wasn't here before.

Starfire selected a title off the self and studied it carefully before flipping it over and reading the back out loud. "Sakura accidentally releases the mischievous spirits of the Clow Book and now they are running wild. Only the legendary Cardcaptors have the ability to capture these spirits, but who would have thought that the easily frightened Sakura, would be one of those? With help from Kero, the guardian spirit of the cards, and her serious-minded classmate, Li, Sakura strives to bring peace by capturing the dangerous spirits of the Clow."

Raven, who had been cringing from the fluffy pink cover and sugarcoated summary, let out a sigh of relief.

"Wow, she looks like you!" Exclaimed Starfire.

"What!" Raven shrieked.

"See," Starfire pointed, "You have a similar hairstyle-,"

"Not really."

"And she possesses a magic book as you do-,"

"…Uh…"

"And she is also in love with a boy who has a relation to the color green!"

"……Shut up, Starfire. I am not like Cardcaptor Sakura."

"But-,"

"No."

"……"

"……"

"Okay. We'll how about this movie then." Starfire suggested as she picked up another title. "Inuyasha. The story of a half-demon who-,"

"Put it down." Commanded Raven.

"…Why?"

"I don't want you comparing me to Inuyasha. And if you do—which I know you will—I will have to hurt you."

"……" Starfire put the movie back on the shelf.

Raven made the first move and grabbed a movie off the shelf. She read the label silently—her eyebrow arching higher and higher until Starfire spoke up. "What does it say?"

Raven looked to the video, then to Star, then back and began reading, "Contains the chronically over-challenged and understaffed secret ideological organization of ACROSS (total membership: 2), whose goal is to conquer the city of F. Also contains your complete daily requirements of Martian Princesses-,"

Raven gave Starfire a quick look.

"afro-wearing Action Heroes, Mysterious Governmental Agencies, Space Butlers, deranged Comic Book Authors-,"

She looked straight at where she knew the audience was and gave them look.

"Androgynous Prisoners in Iron Masks, Annoying Roommates-,"

She glanced at the boys who were now fighting over which movie to get quite violently.

"Removable Moustaches and a generous supply of Adorably Cute Aliens Bent on Galactic Domination. Also contains one (1) emergency food supply/dog and one (1) Excel, the most certifiably insane girl to ever walk the face of the planet." (AN: DAMN! That took forever.)

Starfire blinked, blinked again, and smiled. "We'll get that then!" She cheered.

Raven grinned and turned to Starfire, "Get Cardcaptors too. We'll make the boys watch that."

Starfire beamed and retrieved the pink-colored case. She was truly glad that they added an Anime section.

Sometimes rental places could sadistically fun. And evil. Can't forget evil.

…Owari…

…

Disclaimer: Don't look now; the kiwis will eat your soul with their cheese plushies of doom! Beware the shoelace! Despite what information the rabid frogs may have informed you with, I do not own Teen Titans, which means we will be busy trying to take over the company running it and unclogging our chimney.

The movies that made cameos were: The Slayers, Cardcaptors, Inuyasha, and Excel Saga. The movie summaries that made cameos were: Cardcaptors and Excel Saga. I made the Inuyasha one up.

Sadly, the movie rental place that I always went to—that has TONS of anime—we have overdue fines at and can't go anymore. The one I go to now just has Pokemon and no offence but that sucks.

The idea of comparing Raven to Cardcaptor Sakura is disturbing and amusing. We scare ourselves sometimes.

Eh, sorry for the shortness and sorry for the pointlessness. Good day.