Ok, so this is a short little piece for after Pheobe lost her baby and vanquished Cole in the 4th season.
Unleashed Emotions
She stood in what used to be the bedroom she shared with him, the man she loved.
She had promised herself that she wouldn't come back here.
Her mind and her heart were struggling. Her mind was telling her that she needed to continue her life as best she could, return to work, vanquish demons, talk to her sisters, but her heart kept aching.
It wasn't as if her husband had died in a car accident or been shot, not that these things could have lessened the pain. It was the fact that she had done it herself. She had recited the spell that killed her soul mate, her lover. She had watched him as he was engulfed in flames and sent to Hell. And even as he watched the woman who was supposed to love him, recite a spell to kill him, he didn't give up on their love. With his dying breath, he had told her that he would always love her.
Why was it that his love for her was so much stronger? Why didn't she save him?
As she wallowed in self pity, she sat on their bed, a place which held so many memories.
The teddy bear he had given her still sat on the bed.
He had been so excited about the baby. Even as the Source took him over, he had never held back his feelings.
Pheobe pulled the bear close to her, and laid down. She began to cry. She cried for her, for Cole, and for the child she had never been able to meet.
The Seer had told her that the child was never her's, but why did she feel that bond? She had felt her child, and after the initial shock had worn off, been happy about the baby.
It was only after the Seer had given her the tonic that she had begun to feel like the child she was carrying was different.
After the Seer took the baby from her, Pheobe acted as if nothing had happened, that it hadn't even phased her.
She had hoped that her sisters, or at least Piper would have acknowledge the pain she was feeling. Piper had mentioned it once, but that was it. Paige had called her son a "thing." She apologized for it, but the pain stuck.
That night, only hours after losing her child, the family sat in the living room talking. Pheobe kept quiet for the most part and just listened. It was a conversation between Leo and Piper that rubbed salt into her already open wounds. Pheobe could still remember his exact word, the tone he had used. It had hurt so much.
"I'm still looking forward to having a good baby in the family," Leo had said.
He had said it right in front of her without even thinking that it might have hurt her.
She realized that they believed the baby was evil, but they hadn't been close to him, felt him growing inside. To her, he was and always would be her baby boy.
She didn't hold it against her family, the fact that they didn't acknowledge her loss. She was the one who had pretended that she was all right.
She felt detached from the world, like she was just an outsider looking in. Feeling that way, somehow made the pain easier to manage. Holding her feeling in, the loss of her husband, the love of her life, and her child, it was just too much. She had to get away, and detaching herself from reality seemed to work pretty well at covering up the pain.
She fell asleep on their bed, the teddy bear in her arms, dreaming of what could have been, a smile on her sleeping face.
So how was it? Please review.
All of my stories are starting to sound the same