"Hey Alfred, what do you think happens when we die?"
The man, 'Alfred', glanced over at his brother. His golden blond hair blew as a gentle wind swept across the field that they had been laying in. Alfred sighed and sat up. His younger brother, Matthew, didn't ask questions like this often. It was rare, but he did ask occasionally. Looking at Matthew he chanced a glance at his brothers lilac eyes. When he looked Alfred could see the slight pain that they held. The constant pain of being ignored and forgotten.
Matthew was special. So was Alfred. They weren't human. Alfred was the personification of the United States of America. He was loud, brash, and childish. He was abnormally strong. When he was younger, he had been able to swing around a fully grown, adult male buffalo around as thought it were a stuffed toy. He couldn't read the atmosphere all the time, but he did make attempts at times. When he was able to read the atmosphere, he could often times make sense of it and try to make every one feel better with his childish and idiotic antics. He was able to put a smile on there faces. But it made him look like an idiot.
Alfred did how ever, know when it was appropriate for his childishness. Right now, was not one of them. Right now his brother needed a little family time. And he wanted to give him that. But the problem was, that well, he didn't know Matthew very well. Alfred knew that Matthew was the personification of Canada. Ergo, he's often over shadowed by America himself. Alfred didn't mean to over shadow his younger brother. Half the time he didn't even realize that he was doing it. He just did.
"To be honest Mattie, I'm not sure. We're Nations, so we can't technically die." Alfred responded. "So long as our country is around, so are we. Except in Gilbert's case. Because he's special."
Matthew laughed at Alfred 'special' comment. He knew Alfred meant it as an insult. Any chance Alfred got to insult the albino ex-nation, he'd take it in a heart beat. It annoyed Matthew a little bit that his brother didn't like the man he was dating, even if he wouldn't say it to his face. Alfred wasn't able to hide his hatred well. He never was. But that made it easier to tell if you were on his list. And if you were on his list... Then... Well.
Just look at every other country he's had a problem with. He doesn't have the cleanest war record.
"What brought this question on?" Alfred Asked, looking towards the empty field.
"I don't know. I've just been doing a lot of thinking. You know, since i have so much time on my hands." Matthew said jokingly, as he sat up and playfully shoved his brother with his shoulder. Alfred sighed, he knew what his brother meant, and a wave of guilt passed through him. Matthew noticed Alfred's sudden change in attitude. He opened his mouth to apologize , but was interrupted by Alfred talking.
"You know you shouldn't do that. Its dangerous."
"What think?"
"Yeah."
Matthew laughed. "Then I'd be like you! Brian-less!"
Alfred scowled. "Hey! I find that highly insulting to Americans! I have some smart people."
"Key word being 'some'."
"MATTHEW! That's mean!" Alfred wined. Matthew just laughed, and stood up. Alfred knew not all his people were the sharpest tool in the shed. But every country had people like that. It just wasn't as flaunted as it was in America.
"It's mean but you know it's true, and you can't deny it."
"Who ever the hell said Canadians were nice people were lying. You're an Asshole."
Matthew laugh and looked at his brother. "It must be all the 'merican influence that come into my country, because of you. 'Merica!" It was beyond obvious that Matthew was mocking his brother. As most of his citizens did. Matthew struck a body builder pose and made a stupid face. Alfred just shook his head. Not meany people realized just what a jerk his brother could truly be. Namely because no one knew Matthew for who he was. Or saw him for that matter. All the while, Matthew was still making stupid poses to his brother.
"Hey Matt, can i ask you something?" Alfred said looking up at his brother. Matthew stopped with the stupid poses and looked at his brother. Frowning Matthew nodded. "Yeah, sure whats up?"
"Well, This is a little personal, so feel free to stop me at any time." Matthew raised an eyebrow, but nodded at his brother once more.
"I was just wondering, what's it like to be alone? Like I mean, what is it like to be invisible to almost everyone?" He asked. Alfred tried to make it sound as nice as possible, but it was a touchy subject with him.
Matthew's frown deepened at the question. He knew it was going to come sooner or later. With a sigh he looked up at the stars once more. There was a pause before Matthew spoke once more. "Honestly Al," He started. "It sucks. It is probably the worst feeling in the world. It feels like there's a hole inside you trying to suck up every little bit of happiness you hold dearly. It can drive a normal human to madness.
"Then when you finally get the attention you so desperately carve it feels amazing! You feel like anything is possible, and you hope that it never goes away. Even if you know deep down that it wont last forever, you desperately want it to and you try everything in your power to make it stay. But when it does leave... Well It leaves you feeling like you don't want to live.
"Depression comes back and rears its ugly head. It laughs at you and you feel like every one is mocking you. Laughing behind your back. You being to be paranoid. And sometime it makes you want to end your life. So you try."
Matthew stopped talking. Alfred could see tears dripping down his face. Alfred knew his brother was speaking from experience. Matthew turned back to his brother and smiled. It was an honest smile. One that showed love. Love for life, and a determination to live that life. Matthew spoke again.
"That's why it means so much when you come visit me Al. It helps get me out of things like that. If it weren't for you, Gilbert, and a few others, then i don't think i would have made it. Thank you, brother."
Matthew sat back down and gave Alfred a hug. One that Alfred kindly returned to his brother. Pulling away, Alfred could still see that Matthew still had a few tears running down his face. The tears, Alfred could tell, were starting to slow. He wiped away the tears that did come until they stopped. When they did, Alfred once again hugged his brother.
"You never answered my question, Alfred. I know that were nations, but if our body dies, what happens? Does our nation live on, does the land start to die? If our nation is destroyed then, do we remain?" Matthew said pulling away from Alfred once more.
"Well then we'd be like Gilbert?"
"No, he's the one god forgot about, remember?"
Alfred chuckled at that a little. When it came to the Prussian, every one had there own theory as to why the ex-nation was still around. He often would just say that he was too awesome to leave, and that the world needed his awesomeness.
The north-american brothers would just shrug off the Prussians words.
"Right, right, I'm sorry, I totally forgot, man! Anyways maybe we should head home now. It's getting late." Alfred mumbled standing up. Matthew nodded and followed his brothers actions.
"Where are you staying while we're here?" Alfred asked, knowing that Matthew wouldn't want to be a pain by asking to stay with him. Usually Matthew would just stay at a hotel, unless Alfred dragged his ass to his place in which case he was forced to stay for at least a week. The younger blond nation had only just resonantly just started to stay at Alfred's house with out asking, knowing that he's always welcome.
"Well seeing as how you won't let me stay anywhere else, your place." Matthew answered.
"When we get to my place how about you make us some dinner? Since you won't eat at Micky D's."
"You know damn well i won't eat there. That food is unhealthy as shit and you know it. And any thing you make is almost as bad as something Arthur makes, I have no choice BUT to do the cooking."
"Matt~! Why are you so mean to me!" Alfred whined. He knew he could cook, he was just lazy so he preferred to make T.V. dinners instead of home cooked meals. And when he did cook, it never turned out how he wanted and it often times resembled something that their former caretaker would make. That is to say, something completely inedible.
"Because you can't cook worth shit. That's why." Matthew laughed. Growing up, they had to do the cooking, Because their caretaker had no idea what the hell he was doing. Often times it was Matthew that would cook the meals. So naturally he became good at it. It also might have helped that he was under France's control before Britten's. And Francis knew how to cook. So it was Francis was the one who tough Matthew how to cook properly. Otherwise the poor boy might have starved to death. The rest of the world blamed Arthur for Alfred's bad taste in food products. Even Matthew did.
"Specking of being able to cook, how's old Francey-pants doing anyways?" Alfred asked. Matthew just shrugged. "I don't know. And quiet frankly I don't care." Was the blonds reply.
"You should talk to him you know. Despite what he did, he does miss you, you know."
"Again Alfred, I don't care. He knew what the out come of his choices were, and proceeded with them anyways. Not only that but the bastard had all but abandoned me to Arthur. The two of use didn't speak again until World war 1. You know this Alfred. And besides, If Francis really did miss me, then why doesn't he call or pop by to speak to me? Alfred I know you mean well, But i want nothing more to do with Francis. As far as i'm concerned, he's an asshole. Moving on."
When Matthew finished, Alfred shook his head. He knew there was no chance of changing his brothers opinion on the french nation. And he knew no to bring it up again. Matthew always held a small resentment towards the Frenchman for leaving him in the care of Arthur. Alfred would never know that feeling. He couldn't know it. Matthew also felt the same way towards the Nordics. But the feeling was lessened with them, to the point where he could actually have a conversations with them. But when it came to the Frenchman, It was pure hate. The things that his nation helped spark didn't help matters any. And that was what Matthew was mainly pissed off about. The fact the he showed up next to his leader, was what really set the Canadian off. When all was said and done in the end, Matthew still refuses to speck to the french nation.
Every time the Canadian saw his former caretaker, he turned heal and walk in the opposite direction. It brought so much pain the the elder that his little boy never wanted speak with him that, he was often found drinking with Arthur. Of course the other nations had no idea why the two nations would go out and drink together. Every one thought they hated each other. It wasn't until you looked at their similarity that you can see why they would go drinking together.
There was only a few people who knew about what went down behind the seances. Alfred being one of them. Francis would occasionally appear, drunk, and crying. He cried about how much he missed his son and how he didn't want anything more then how much he wanted to be able to even talk to Matthew without the blond turning around to take his leave, way before the Frenchman had a chance to see him. If he ended up sitting beside him at a world meeting Matthew would try and trade seats with some one else. It was sad to see the lengths that the Canadian would go to, to avoid any and all confrontation with his former caretaker.
"Matthew, you know you can't run away from Francis forever."
"No, but I can sure as hell try."
With that the brothers ended the conversation. There wasn't much more to say. Alfred knew that he had to tired carefully for the rest of the weekend least he get a lecture as to why he should mind his own business. And NO ONE needed one of Matthews lectures. EVER.
Alfred just prayed he would be able to use his brain this weekend. Chances are that he wouldn't be able to complete his mission. Namely because he just was that dumb sometimes, and he couldn't quite control what comes out of his mouth. There was no filter between his mouth and his brain.
Matthew knew his brother meant well, He just wasn't ready to speak to the french country. Maybe one day he would be, but not right now.
The brothers walked silently to their vehicles. Knowing anything they say could just make there brotherly weekend end abruptly early.
A/N Honestly... This was meant to be deeper then it is. It went an entirely different direction. But now it's a brotherly bonding Fic... Oh well... i enjoyed writing this. A little head cannon of mine is that Canada is still mad at France for every thing he's done, and wants nothing to do with his dear old papa... Why do i have this head cannon? I don't know, I just do. This will turn into a multi-chapter one.
I Own Nothing. Review please?