"What the heck are you watching, Sammy—sesame street? I can't believe this." Dean dropped his bookbags on the floor. 13-year-old Sam looked at him seriously. "Hey, I figured since I never had a normal childhood with Dad, I may as well start now." Shameless fluff. Dean and Sam talk.

--

"What the heck are you watching, Sammy—sesame street? I can't believe this." Dean dropped his bookbags on the floor. Raising a 13-year-old was hard work, especially for a 19-year-old college student. "You okay? Do I need to take you to the doc's?"

"You mean Bobby's?" Sam asked, looking at him and rolling his eyes. "No way, Dean. I'm fine."

"Then why are you watching Sesame Street?"

13-year-old Sam looked at him seriously. "Hey, I figured that since I never had a normal childhood with Dad, I may as well start now."

Dean ran his hand through his hair. He and Sam never really talked about their father's abandonment; it was something far more painful for Dean then for Sam—while John had always been a good father for Sam, he'd left Dean to raise himself. "Sam…"

"I didn't mean it that way, dude. Take a chill pill." Sam leaned back into the couch, drinking his coca-cola. It was way to much fun to mess with Dean like this, even though the unwritten rule was "Never, ever mention Dad." He wasn't trying to mess with Dean's emotional baggage—he'd learned from that experience. However, he'd learned of 'Sesame Street' at school, when some kid was talking about it, and realized he'd missed out on a great part of his childhood by never being able to watch it. "I think Barney's on next," he offered halfheartedly.

Dean suppressed a snort that came out more like a choked gag. "Sam, I've got my boss coming over in half an hour, an' I'm tryin' to cook dinner, an' you're watching sesame street?"

"You cook?"

"Hey, I heat up store-bought pizza pretty dang good," Dean replied with a smile as he stuck it in the oven. "Seriously, Sam, are you OK? I know Dad leavin' did a number on your head." After a fight with Dean one night, John left, leaving a custody note stating that Dean could raise Sammy.

And they hadn't seen John since. Not even Bobby had seen John. And the memory of John leaving was still fresh in Sam's mind—just as it was in Dean's. And ever since then, Sam had been acting weird, doing things that John had never let them. One of the things Sam had been doing lately was watching TV. Some of it was cartoons, some of it was little kids' shows, and some of it was congressional hearings. The kids' shows were what scared Dean the most. Sam brought home a straight A average that impressed all the teachers. He'd had more than one conference with a teacher, reassuring the teacher that he had no problems "raising a little genius".

"I'm okay." Sam shut off the TV and came into the kitchen, putting his elbows on the table, another thing that John hated. He slid into the chair. "I guess I'm just – I'm glad to be normal, Dean, don't get me wrong, but I miss Dad. Why? Why do I miss Dad after all he put me through?"

"Oh, Sam." Dean sighed as he, too, sat on the table. "It's hard to explain…"

"But you're a genius, Dean! You have to know," Sam replied, pounding his fist on the table.

"I don't understand everything, Sam—4.0's in school don't mean much to real life," Dean replied with a sigh. "Dad loved you, Sam. It was the liquor that took him away. He loves you so much…"

"What about you, Dean? Does Dad love you?" Sam asked, his eyes baring intently into Dean's.

Mentally cursing himself, Dean sighed. He should learn better than to get into talks like this with his younger brother. The true answer was that John didn't do so well at love, and he probably hated Dean, but always took care of Sam. It was something they both did. Dean was surprised that John hadn't token off with Sam the second he was 18 but was nonethess grateful that John had left the teenage boy with Dean. "Yeah, I think so," he lied, checking on the pizza. "Do me a favor and get dressed in some cleaner clothes, kiddo. I don't want my boss to think we live in rags." He reached over and turned the TV on to some news.

"Okay," Sam replied, getting up. The talk with Dean had satisfied him, if only for a bit. "Dean?" he asked.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

--

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