Disclaimer: I wish I owned Twilight.
A/N: So this is basically a collection of one-shots or two-shots that happen in Forks High School. I don't really like writing actual stories, so I decided this would be a good idea. This first one is in two parts, so please review! (So I can get better, and the fact that I just like reviews.) :D
A delicious scent of freesias filled the room as Bella walked in gym. I smiled at her and held her soft hand.
"I'm so glad you're in this class too." she said.
I recently changed into gym with Bella after bribing the counselor with chocolates and flowers. Standing next to the door was our substitute teacher, a 20-year old with a frightening amount of makeup on. Her hair was dyed a platinum blonde, and her boobs were the size of basketballs. Good thing Bella can't hear me.
Ooh la la, who is that sexy piece of meat over there?, the substitute thought.
Okay, these are the times when I really wish I couldn't hear other people's thoughts. Bella was standing there sweetly staring at me. I felt completely violated from this random person, not that this was the first time.
"Do you think the substitute is hot?" she asked suddenly.
"My god, Bella, absolutely not." I said a little too rudely.
"I'm kidding, Edward." she laughed.
"Sorry love, I'm trying to keep her insane thoughts out of my head. Emmett was thinking about how she was 'eye-raping' me." I said.
Bella giggled, then accidentally snorted. Then she pressed her blushing face into her hands. It was so cute.
Then I felt the stare of the sub again. She was looking at my chest.
Everyone sat down on the bleachers. Mike Newton plopped down next to me as the disgusting scent of cheap hair gel and cologne drifted my way. I scooted further from him and set my arms around Bella. Her heart thudded loudly.
"AHEM!" the sub said in an irritating voice. "I am like your substitute teacher, and my name is like Ms. Amber. We are still gonna like run and stuff, so like don't fool around. Like yeah, that's all."
Blood crept up Bella's cheeks, and she was stifling a laugh. So was I.
Oh my gosh. The girl next to the sexy beast just like, laughed at me, the sub thought.
I stopped laughing.
"Um, excuse me, girl sitting next to the boy with bronze hair. Do you think I'm funny?" she asked, while placing a hand on one hip.
"Like, no." Bella said in a perfect imitation.
I heard Emmett quietly chuckle when I did. I rolled my eyes at Ms. Amber. She just stood there, completely clueless that she just got insulted.
"That's like what I thought. So today, we are like going to do like push ups, first!" she said eagerly, never breaking eye contact with me.
"That's like for first graders, and that's so like boring!" someone yelled.
"Like suck it up!" she said, popping the 'p' "Why don't we have gorgeous bronze haired boy over there like come and do an example?"
That way I can like touch his fine ass.
Ms. Amber is creeping me out. Bella looked at me with one eyebrow raised.
"I'm sure everyone knows how to do a push up Ms. Amber." I said in a monotone, not trying to give her any wrong leads.
Haha Eddie, this is revenge, Emmett thought as I mentally slapped myself.
"I don't know how to do a pushup, why not show us, dear Edward?" Emmett said.
"Yes, come down Edward." she said.
I let go of Bella to walk down the steps and swore to kill Emmett later. I walked down, and Ms. Amber stared at me. Her stupid boobs were so freaking big it was hard to stare elsewhere. It was extremely awkward, so I tried to look at Bella.
"Good. Now Edward, please do 5 push-ups. Do them very slowly so we all get it." she said as I layed down on the ground.
1,
My god, look at those muscles...
2,
His ass is so fine...
3,
I wish I could like touch it.
4,
I want to like smother him in honey and then like devour him like a hungry bear.
5,
Are my boobs too small?
I stood up, refusing to make eye content. She was practically screaming her thoughts at me. Some of the girls in the class were staring at me, but not as creepily as she was.
"That was very good. Those push-ups were amazing." she said.
She leaned over to hug me, but I quickly climbed up the bleachers.
Wow Edward, Wow. Emmett thought.
"Now everybody. Get with like a partner and each do 50 push-ups each. Like separately. You have like 3 minutes." she said.
"Want to be my partner?" I asked Bella.
"Of course!" she said.
We walked down the bleachers again. Ms. Amber was like glaring at Bella, like she seriously wanted to like kill her. Oh no. I'm starting to talk like her.
"Would you like to go first?" I politely asked.
"Haha, no way. Go ahead." she said.
I shrugged and started push-ups. Bella looked at me with a mixture of awe and jealousy.
"You know, you can talk to me right now. I can count at the same time." I said.
"Okay. So is it just me, or is the substitute into you?" she asked.
"She's into me. You have no idea how scary her thoughts are."
"Isn't that sexual harassment?"
"Just what I thought."
Ms. Amber was walking around checking on everybody, but her mind was still one me.
"Edward, I don't think I can do any pushups." she pouted.
"Yes you can Bella, probably not 50 though, that's a ridiculous amount." I reassured her."She probably won't even notice.
Ms. Amber blew the whistle into the speakerphone.
"That was like three minutes, so like switch." she said.
Then she started walking towards my direction. I just ignored it and told Bella to do as many pushups as she could. Ms. Amber must've put two bottles worth of perfume on herself.
"Edward, I'd like to like talk with you like outside the hall for like a little bit." she said, then pointing to Bella. "You are in charge while I talk to Eddie here."
Bella just nodded and gave me a pity stare. I'm glad she didn't think that I was actually interested in her. Emmett gave me a dude-she's-totally-going-to-molest-you-more stare.
As soon as we were outside, she pressed a finger up to my lips. I ripped them away from me as non-aggressively as possible.
"I've been watching you Edward, and I know how much you want me." she said.
"Um. No. First of all, I'm an interested at all. Second of all, you need help." I said as politely as possible before walking toward the door.
Just as I reached the door handle, she ran her fingers up my arm. I groaned and walked away.
"You're so cold Eddie, I could warm you up." she said slowly.
"Stop molesting me, you creeper!" I said, I didn't really have the patience to be polite right now.
She was still staring at me when I walked in the gym. Then she grabbed my shoulder.
"Please Edward, just give me a chance." she begged pathetically.
I've had enough.
"I'M GAY!" I screamed. "THAT'S WHY I DON'T WANT YOU!"
Everybody gasped, and complete silence filled the room. Until Emmett decided to break that.
"Like oh my gosh, Eddie."
A/N: Haha, I'm posting part two tomorrow! This chapter was really weird and fun to write, just like everything else I write. Hope it was fun to read though!
BerryBella