This was written pre-chapter 377. Was going to wait to post until I'd finished a few more fics related to this one, but I haven't been feeling like writing much lately so I figured I'd just put this one up for now. Sorry in advance for any odd looking formatting. ~.~!

I don't own Bleach.

Tea Time

It was some time, a few months after Aizen's defeat, that Ichigo showed up at the Vizard warehouse banging on the door. In tow was Rukia, whom the Vizards had been introduced to shortly after the war, and a young girl no more than 9 or 10 that had a remarkable resemblance to Ichigo.

Shinji grinned when he saw the trio, "Aren't you a little young to have kids already Ichigo?"

"She's my sister stupid, and you have the honor of lookin' after her for the rest of the day."

Hiyori, who'd previously been sitting near the couch with the other Vizards, pushed Shinji out of the doorway, "Hey dickhead, where did you see a sign saying we ran a babysitting service? Why ain't you watchin' her?"

They got the hint when Ichigo and Rukia's cheeks flushed.

"Today is our three month anniversary. I promised Rukia we'd go somewhere nice, but I wasn't counting on having to watch Yuzu today."

"I'm sure Kisuke can manage her," Hiyori retorted, hands on her hips.

"Already tried, Jinta said Urahara and Tessai are in Soul Society on some sort of business."

"So you had to bring here here?!" she slapped her forehead.

Ichigo sighed, "What else am I supposed to do? I can't leave her home alone! She's only 10!"

At this point Yuzu was getting uncomfortable and the first signs of tears were beginning to show. "Ichi-nii, I don't have to.."

Shinji sighed, interrupting the girl, "Alright, you better bring us back something good for dinner."

"I knew we could count on you!" Ichigo and Rukia bolted out the door before Hiyori could pull off her sandal to protest.

"What the fuck Shinji! Why'd you give in like that? I'm not watchin' her," the shorter Vizard growled. The remaining Vizards took this opportunity to sneak out the backdoor unnoticed, not wanting to get stuck with this chore.

"Oh come on, it's just a few hours. It's not that big of a deal, how hard can it be to entertain a 10 year old?"

Hiyori was preparing to bring out a sandal when the cause of all the hype spoke up for the first time, "Umm.. I'm Yuzu, nice to meet you. Thank you very much for watching over me while Ichi-nii is gone," she bowed.

Hiyori blinked, staring at the girl, as did Shinji, "Sarugaki Hiyori, you can just call this baldy next to me dickfa-,"

"Shinji, Hirako Shinji," he interrupted, putting one hand over his partner's mouth, "Nice to meet you."

The taller blonde flashed one of his trademark grins, ignoring the muffled protests of Hiyori, before turning to introduce the other Vizards, "Here's the rest of our merry family. The pleasantly plump one is Hac-," he paused, noticing the empty living room, "Err.. I'm sure they went to pick out a board game for us to play! Why don't we sit down? Make yourself comfortable!"

Shinji yelped when the angry Vizard he'd been restraining bit down on his hand, then turned around and headbutt him. "Board game my ass! They did the smart thing and ditched us!" she huffed, prancing back to her spot on the couch.

Yuzu glanced nervously between the two, before following Hiyori and taking a seat next to her. Shinji soon followed as well, plopping down on the other side of the young girl. An awkward silence followed. The three of them were an odd sight to behold. The two ex-shinigami looked away in opposite directions with an expression similar to a pouting child on both of their faces, while the small Kurosaki stared straight ahead twiddling her thumbs unsure of what to do.

"Why are you carrying swords?" Yuzu broke the silence, "Were you playing dress up?" she looked back and forth between the two.

Both Vizards stared at the girl not knowing how to answer that question. "Ichigo really thought this one through didn't he?" Shinji muttered, glancing away.

"We study the ancient techniques of ninja," Hiyori blurted out. Her partner snickered.

"Oh! That sounds exciting!" she clapped her hands cheerfully, "Please give me a demonstration!"

The babysitters glanced at each other, trying to plan out their next move. Shinji was the first to stand and draw his zanpakutou, "Alright, but just a quick one! If we get too serious we'd be breaking the secret ninja code of secrecy." Hiyori rolled her eyes and drew her sword as well.

The two clashed blades, pretending to be serious. Dodging swings, twirling around, random jumps here and there. Anything to put on a little show. When it began to get too hard for them to keep from bursting out laughing at how silly they must look, Shinji pulled a fast one and tripped Hiyori, pinning her to the ground.

"Hey what the fuck dickhead?" she growled, struggling beneath him. Shinji flashed a grin. Hiyori followed up with a knee to the groin.

"That was amazing!" Yuzu stood clapping, "So talented! Does Ichi-nii know the secret ways of ninja too? He never tells me where he's running off to all the time."

Hiyori laughed, "He sure does. You should have him give you a demonstration some time."

Shinji groaned as he attempted to stand, "Yes, a demonstration... Have him do that. Rukia too." Payback's a bitch.

With the excitement of the fight quickly gone, another awkward silence followed. Yuzu glanced around the warehouse, taking in the scenery, or lack there of. Hiyori was sprawled out on the floor staring at the ceiling and Shinji had a finger in his nose. Oh the other Vizards were going to have hell to pay...

"How do you know Ichi-nii? Do you go to school with him? I don't remember seeing any of you before," the young girl broke the silence again.

Neither ex-shinigami made an effort to respond. She was a nosy one wasn't she? Just like her brother.

"Yea, we graduated before him." Shinji lied.

Silence again.

"Did you two graduate together? Hiyori-chan looks a year or two younger than you..."

Shinji acted quick, noticing his partner reaching to pull off her sandal, "No, she just acts like it so it might seem to affect her appearance sometimes." Wrong answer.

Rubbing the newly formed shoe mark on his head, he reached for the remote, "What do you like to watch? We get all the anime networks since Rose and Love are such fans," Shinji flipped through a few channels in hopes of finding something to keep the girl distracted.

"I don't watch TV. My teacher said it's bad for you," Yuzu replied, much to their dismay.

"Well then, what do you do for fun?"

"Oh lots of things! I cook, and play dress up, and clean house, and play soccer, and babysit my dad, and go for walks," she paused, counting things out on her fingers, "And I love to have tea parties! I invite all of my stuffed animals. Ichi-nii's too!"

The two stared at her.

"A tea party would be so fun! Do you have any tea?" she smiled cheerfully at them.

Needless to say, the last thing either of them wanted to do was have a tea party. "No, we don't I'm sorry. None of us here like tea, we just drink water," Shinji lied again.

"Oh that's ok! Water will do just fine! You just have to use your imagination and pretend it's tea!"

Hiyori rubbed her forehead. She was never having kids. Ever. "Baldy and I aren't very good at using our imagination. Wouldn't you rather play cards or something?"

Her eyes immediately filled with the first signs of tears. "I guess that'd be okay..."

"How about we do both?" Shinji suggested. Hiyori clenched her fists, clearly not happy with that arrangement either. Noticing this he stood up and began walking to the kitchen, motioning for his partner to follow, "We'll go get the glasses and the cards, just make yourself feel at home."

Once they were out of view Hiyori decked him across the face, "Way to go dickhead! Now we gotta pretend to be a bunch of sissies drinking tea. Why am I the one stuck here with her? I'll kill Ichigo!"

"Oi, she's not that bad. Besides, you totally had fun playing ninja." She kicked him across the back for suggesting it, but couldn't find a comeback, "She'll be gone in a couple hours anyways, let's just humor her and hope that Ichigo follows through with the food." he handed Hiyori the glasses and a bottle of water while he went to find the cards.

The pigtailed girl sulked back into the living room and plopped down on the floor facing Yuzu who was staring at her deep in thought. Hiyori cocked an eyebrow, setting the makeshift tea set on the coffee table in front of the couch. The younger girl glanced back towards the kitchen to see if Shinji was within hearing range before turning back to her.

"Are you Shinji-kun's girlfriend?" Yuzu whispered.

Hiyori's eyebrow twitched. "Idiot, why would I date that baldy?"

She paid no mind to the fact that she had just been called an idiot, "You two seem to have an awful lot of fun picking on each other... My dad says that if a boy and girl fight a lot it means they're in love, kinda like Ichi-nii and Rukia-chan!"

Surprisingly, a light blush found its way to the Vizard's cheeks. Of course she cared about Shinji, quite a bit more than just a friend would, anyone could see that, but the word 'love' didn't seem to fit her personality very well so hearing this girl suggest it threw her off a bit. At least that's what she was telling herself.

"Tch, how could anyone love someone so annoying. He practically asks to have his face beaten in!" she added emphasis by balling up her hands and punching them together.

Before Yuzu could question her anymore, Shinji came bouncing back into the room, cards in hand.

"Here we go! Let the tea party begin!" he shouted, taking a seat next to Hiyori.

The younger girl, totally forgetting the previous conversation, jumped up and clapped her hands before sitting back down again, "Tea time! Tea time! How exciting!"

Hiyori rolled her eyes and grabbed the bottle of water. She made a move to pour some in her glass but changed her mind and decided she'd rather just drink from the bottle. Yuzu gasped, and Shinji yanked the bottle from her before she could drink anymore.

"You're supposed to use the glass dipshit. This is a tea party, not a gym."

"Maybe I just don't want to be stuck doing dishes later!" she growled in response.

He began pouring water into Yuzu's glass, then went to fill his own, "Can just pawn the dishes off on someone else, I think it's Rose's turn this week anyways."

"Whatever." she filled her own glass and chugged it before slamming it back down on the table.

Yuzu gasped again, "You're supposed to drink with your pinky out! Like this!" She demonstrated.

"I am not. Drinking my water. With my pinky out." Annoyance was clearly written on her face.

After several minutes of protesting, and a few punches to Shinji's face later, Hiyori was drinking her 'tea' with her pinky sticking out and doing her damn best to try and act like she was having fun. When in reality she was planning out revenge in the back of her mind.

The rest of the tea party went on without interruption. Yuzu never let silence linger for too long, and kept the conversation going. Once she started talking she never shut up. After over an hour of her rambling, the tea was all but forgotten about and the dynamic duo was doing their best to stay awake. Shinji would give a rough poke to Hiyori's side whenever she'd start to nod off, which eventually led to his face being smashed into the table.

"Let's watch a movie," the pigtailed Vizard stood and stomped off toward their movie collection.

"Hey stupid, she said she didn't watch TV you moron," a movie flew across the room and whacked him in the forehead.

"A movie isn't TV! And she has no say in this!" Hiyori marched back to the couch and sat down next to Yuzu who was now looking at the movie case curiously, "If you like tea and princesses so much then you shouldn't have any beef with watching Beauty and the Beast."

Shinji stared at his partner, "You're really going to make me watch this?"

"You made me drink water with my pinky sticking out," she stuck her pinky out and feigned taking a drink for emphasis.

"Fair enough," he stuck the movie in and sat on the opposite side of Yuzu.

"You know this is Hiyori's favorite movie. She watches it like three times a week."

She yanked his hair back. "What was that dickface?!"

The young Kurosaki looked sceptically at the two before turning to face the screen.

They had never seen someone so excited over a Disney movie in their entire 100 years of exile. It was like handing a kid a candybar for dinner. Shinji was worried she'd get up and start dancing along with the tea cups soon. The point of the movie was to get her to fall asleep, not act as a caffeine. Though after the initial joy of seeing dancing tableware passed the two noticed the girl beginning to dose off. Both sighed sighs of relief.

It had to have been after 3 in the morning when the older Kurosaki strolled into the Vizard warehouse. He'd knocked on the door for 5 minutes with no response.

"Ichigo, look how cute.." his girlfriend whispered from behind him.

He grinned at the three figures passed out on the couch. Both Vizards were leaning into each other, Hiyori's head resting on her partner's shoulder. Yuzu was sitting half in Shinji's lap, half on the couch with the top of her body using the older woman's chest as a pillow. It was a Kodak moment that Ichigo took advantage of as he pulled out his camera. Thankfully they had left a light on so he could snap a shot without the flash going off.

Rukia did her best to pick Yuzu up without waking the other two and almost screamed when Shinji let out a loud snore followed by Hiyori muttering 'dickface' in her sleep.

"Hey, put her on my back. I'll carry her home," Ichigo helped his girlfriend.

The pair smirked as they watched the female Vizard pull her knees up to her chest and lean closer into Shinji.

"Flip the lights off and let's go. We can come back in the morning," he whispered, motioning for Rukia to follow.

Shinji woke the next morning to the sound of light breathing and the faint smell of bacon. He also noticed the extra weight on his right side and noted that it was too heavy to be from extra blankets. Daring to open his eyes he had to pause to think of what might have led to him falling asleep on the couch with Hiyori using him as a pillow. Then he remembered the day before. Ichigo's sister. Tea. Movie. ???. What happened to Yuzu again? Shinji assumed that the couple had stopped by to pick her up at some point, but where the hell was the food they were promised! Typical Ichigo. He sighed looking back at the girl curled up next to him. It was odd how peaceful she looked when she slept, so unlike her character. This was something that he had noticed long ago but always pointed out to himself anyways when he watched her sleep, which was more often than he'd care to admit. Even though it wasn't his fault that she picked stupid places to fall asleep at. The roof for example.

Shinji debated getting up. On one hand it was actually quite nice sitting here with Hiyori like this, not that he'd ever mention that outloud, and then there was the fear of waking her in the process and getting a sandal in the face for it. On the other hand, his right arm had fallen asleep some time ago, and there was the smell of food taking over any rational part of thinking. In the end the food won and Shinji got up as carefully as he could to make his way to the kitchen, leaving his partner sleeping on the couch.

All attention turned to him as he strolled into the kitchen. The room went quiet as he made a point to glare at each one of the 6 Vizards staring back at him with an overplayed look of innocence written on their faces. Then he noted the empty breakfast plates and lack of any left overs.

"What. The."

"Fuck," Hiyori finished for him as she barged into the room, her usual angry look had returned to her face once more.

Either he'd woken her when he got up, or she'd been awake the whole time. He assumed the latter or else he would have had a shoe imprint on his face about now. Damn.

"Where the hell did you assholes disappear to!"

Lisa pushed her glasses up, "We went to the park."

"Then the movies," Rose pulled his hair back with his hand.

Mashiro chimed in, "Had dinner at the mall after."

"And stayed the night at Orihime's house," finished Hachi.

There was a brief pause to allow the group to brace themselves for what was coming.

"You couldn't have fucking taken her with you?! What's wrong with you idiots?!" Hiyori cursed.

The rest of the Vizards looked away uninterested. If they were idiots they would have taken Yuzu with them. Hiyori looked like she was about to go hollow on all their asses when Shinji changed the subject.

"Geez, you guys didn't save any breakfast for us did ya?"

No answer.

"Who cooked?"

Silence.

"Oh come on!"

He then spotted the card sitting on the counter. Hiyori beat him too it so he had to stand over her shoulder to read the note.

"Thanks for all the fun! Next time I have a tea party I'll
be sure to invite you two! My dad is buying Beauty and
the Beast for me today so I can finish watching it. I'm
trying to convince Ichigo to teach me the ways of ninja
but so far no luck. He says he doesn't know what I'm
talking about. Tell the rest of your friends that I'd like to
meet them soon too!

Thanks so much!
* Yuzu *

P.S. I made you breakfast since Ichigo forgot to bring you
dinner last night! Hope you enjoy it!"

"How nice of you guys to eat the food I worked my ass off for!" Shinji walked up to Kensei and snagged some pieces of toast left on his plate. The guilty party remained silent, pretending that nothing out of the ordinary happened. Until Love began to laugh.

Lisa noticed what he'd been looking at and joined in. Rose and Kensei soon followed. Mashiro had a her usual look of confusion on her face, and Hachi just looked amused.

Hiyori had been unusually quiet, rereading the note over again, but snapped out of it when Shinji slapped his forehead, "What's so fucking funny you idiots?"

Love pointed to the paper, "We saw the card when Ichigo dropped the food off but didn't notice the back of it!"

She turned the card around. With the way her left eye began to twitch a normal human might have thought Hiyori was having a seizure, but the Vizards knew better.

The back of the card was decorated with flowers and stars. In the center was a very well done drawing of Shinji and Hiyori holding hands with a heart above their heads.

"I'm kill that little..." she wrinkled the card up in her hand and began to stomp out towards the door.

"Oh come on she's just a kid, it's not like she knows any better. Besides maybe if you hadn't had her watch a freaking Disney movie," Shinji stuck a finger in his ear, as he tried to come up with his own defense for the drawing.

The comment earned him a kick across the room as she yelled some more profanities before storming up to her room and slamming the door.

The kitchen went silent once more and the group stared at Shinji where he had crashed into the fridge.

"So you had a tea party?" Mashiro broke the silence, "Sounds fun! Kensei~ Let's have a tea party~!"

"Idiot, shut up."

Lisa grinned, "That sounds like a great idea actually. We should invite that Kurosaki girl too. I bet she has all kinds of stories to tell."

The other Vizards minus Mashiro caught on to what she was suggesting and nodded their heads in approval.

Shinji stood, rubbing the back of his head, clearly annoyed, "Do what you want, leave me out of it. It's your turn to babysit," and with that he was out the door.

Lisa went for the phone. Blackmail. This was gonna be great.