Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Rizzoli & Isles. The characters belong to Tess Gerritsen, Jan Nash, Janet Tamaro, and TNT. I am in now way profiting from this. It's just for fun.
This story is based off a dream I had a few years ago in Jane's POV. Hope ya like it!
Big thanks to fellow author "CosimaHellahaus" for giving me encouragement to actually post this. Check out their stories, they're amazing!
2-27-15 Update
I've edited this chapter and added some things to it, for further info please read my bio. The author's note in chapter 34 also explains things. If you'dlike to see what the original chapter content was, feel free to send me a PM. I'd be happy to share it. I think this update is a little better than what I had before. I barely changed anything, I basically just added the conversation between Jane and Casey.
When Dreams Become Reality Ch. 1
There's always one case that stays with a cop forever. Jane Rizzoli already had several of those that will haunt her. But she is strong. She has a loving family and two amazing partners. Most of all, she has Maura. The love of her life. Her soulmate.
For years Jane never confessed her love for the stunning woman, thinking Maura would never feel the same. So when Casey came along, she threw herself into a relationship with him. He had always liked her, and he was a good man. She felt safe with him. It was the easy choice. No pain or heartbreak. Despite the long distance often between them, they had a good thing going. Or so she thought, until he proposed.
The two had just gotten back to Jane's apartment after dropping off Patrick Doyle Sr. at his new home. The car ride back was silent, neither knowing what to say. Casey couldn't shake the feeling he was about to have his heart broken.
"Jane..." He is the first to utter a word in over an hour. His broken and sad voice betrays his stoic expression.
"I can't, Casey. I'm sorry..." Jane looks into the soldier's pleading eyes, tears spilling over.
"I thought you loved me."
"I... I did. I do. Just... Not the way I should."
"Maura."
"What about her?"
"You love her. I didn't know it until about 2 hours ago. The way you look at her, I just knew... I knew I didn't stand a chance."
"Casey... I..." Jane felt herself getting choked up even more. Words failing her.
He put up a hand to stop her. "I love you, but I want you happy. So if letting you go is what it takes for that, so be it." A small but sad smile flickered across his face. "Just do one thing for me?"
"Anything." Jane promises, still in shock that Casey was being so calm about this.
"Tell her." Jane knows what he means. "And don't ever let her go. You two were made for one another."
Jane sniffled, and was pulled into a hug. Her next words were slightly muffled as she quietly sobbed into his shoulder. "I'm so sorry, Casey."
One hand stayed around her waist while the other rubbed along her back to soothe her cries. "Don't be. I'm just glad I saw it before we actually got married. We'd be in a lot worse situation then with the heartbreak."
The comforting hug ended, and Casey let out a sigh. "I'm gonna go. Take care of yourself, will ya?"
"I will... I guess you're going back to Afghanistan, then?"
"Yeah, probably for a few years." He looks around for his duffel bag, which he hadn't unpacked yet, and slung it over his shoulder.
"Stay safe." Jane kisses him on the cheek, and pauses for a moment before saying "Thank you."
"Goodbye, Jane." He gives her one last smile and closes the door behind him.
That was 6 months ago.
Jane still didn't want to admit her feelings of course, and she constantly berated herself for not following through with her promise to Casey. Well, it's not that she didn't want to, but couldn't. She was still too afraid. She knew Maura was straight. All the dates with men Maura went on, how she pursued Giovanni for the sole purpose of sex. What more proof did Jane need than that? Though she wants more than anything to be with Maura, she couldn't risk their friendship. It would destroy her if she lost Maura. She almost did after the big blowout at the warehouse. She swore she'd never do anything to jeopardize their friendship again.
So the detective stayed silent.
It wasn't all bad, though. Jane still had Sunday dinners, movie nights, morning runs, yoga, and hanging out at the Dirty Robber with Maura.
Tonight it was Maura's turn to pick the movie. Jane figured the honey blonde would pick some boring documentary, when in fact, Maura surprised her with a horror movie. Just when she thought she couldn't love her any more... With their take out food, wine and beer, they started watching.
"I don't get it. How could he still be alive? I thought the he was killed in the first or second movie, isn't he supposed to be an ordinary flesh and blood human being?" Maura asked.
Smirking, Jane knew the unrealistic part of the movie would bug her eventually. "He was at one point. But ya gotta remember it's just a movie. If things were realistic, there wouldn't be a dozen sequels!"
"Maybe so. It is a very suspenseful film."
"See, I knew you liked my movies!" Jane said smugly.
"Yes, and I know you love my documentaries!" The ME playfully smiled as she finished her glass of wine. She got up to get more and took Jane's empty beer bottle to the kitchen as Jane paused the movie.
"Oh yes. I sure do. I was actually surprised you picked my type of movie tonight... I was kinda looking forward to processes of surgery or whatever." Of course this remark was dripping with sarcasm. A trait which would annoy most but something Maura adored. She loved that side of Jane.
Maura walked back over to her couch with her glass refilled and a new bottle of beer for Jane. They finished the movie not much longer after that. With empty cartons thrown away and leftovers put in the fridge, they both settled comfortably on the couch with their drinks.
The two talked for an hour and they both eventually dozed off, snuggled close.
Jane started stirring after a little while and realized Maura was on top of her. She didn't want to wake her but at the same time she knew this was wrong. Before she had time to decide anything, Maura slowly came to. She looked into the brunette's eyes with so much intensity. It was in that moment Jane knew Maura wanted her just as much.
They started to slowly lean into each other and pressed their lips together.
The kiss was sweet but short lived, for Jane's phone rang loud. They broke apart and stared nervously at each other while the phone continued to ring. Eventually, Maura scooted off of Jane to allow her to answer.
"Rizzoli." The detective looked at Maura as she listened to Frost on the other end. Maura wasn't looking at Jane, though she could feel her staring.
"Yeah she's with me... Ok, we'll be right there." Jane ends the call and runs a hand through her thick black hair, sighing. "That was Frost. We gotta go."
Maura simply nodded, unable to form a verbal reply. She left the room to get her things as Jane went to retrieve her gun and badge in her lockbox.
The two got in their own cars, feeling it would be too much to be in the same. Both were afraid of what the other might say. That what happened was a mistake.
"Fuck! Way to go Rizzoli... You kiss the woman you love and don't say a damn thing." Jane was loudly berating herself in the car. She drove way above the speed limit. Sirens blasting. Even though there was a body and it wasn't going anywhere.
Considerably far behind, due to the fact Maura obeyed the speed limit, she was also talking to herself. Minus the obscenities of course.
"Of all the stupid things I've done in my life! Now she's had time to think before we could even talk. I've scared her off! Why didn't I say something before I left?! I should've told her how I felt or at the very least, reassure her that we can still be friends. Damn."
The two continued the verbal assault on themselves until they each arrived at the crime scene. Frost went to greet Jane until he saw her pissed off facial expression.
"Oh no..." He thought.
You don't wanna deal with an angry Jane Rizzoli. She seemed to visibly calm down after a moment, realizing she shouldn't take her mood out on him. It's not his fault she fucked up. She have him a weak smile and said "What do we got?"
He knew something was wrong but didn't wanna press her. They're pretty close, she'll talk when or if she's ready. Silently thanking him for avoiding the subject, Jane approached the body.
"Dog got off the leash and the owner chased after it and discovered the body. White female. Looks like early twenties. No ID. Cause of death is a gunshot wound to the head." Frost stated.
"You know we can't conclusively say that until I've done a full autopsy, Detective Frost." Jane didn't even hear Maura approaching. Not only did she miss the sound of her car pulling up, she missed the sound of her heels, something she loved that was just so Maura.
"Sorry Doc." He said with a grin. It was obvious how the young woman died, but he still played along.
Meanwhile, Jane just stood there. Zoned out and not focusing on anything. Korsak, who had only just arrived, immediately noticed how withdrawn Jane was.
He snapped her out of her daze, waving a hand in front of her face. "Jane, you alright there?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah. Fine, Korsak. Just a little tired, didn't stop for coffee."
This interaction did not go unnoticed by the Medical Examiner, who was kneeling over the body.
'Now I've really done it. I've upset her so much she can't focus. I need to fix this later, back in the morgue. Surely she won't avoid me entirely while there's a new case.' Maura hid her worry well and continued working.
Jane was in full detective mode now. She walked over to Maura, bracing herself for whatever may come.
"Can you tell me anything about the victim, Maur?"
"She appears to be in her early twenties. Apart from the gunshot to the back of the head, there is a significant amount of injuries all over her body. The varying degrees of bruising suggest she was tortured, most likely over a long period of time. Her abdomen is showing an odd color of bruising... I'll need to run tests of course back at the lab."
"How long has she been dead?"
"Rigor hasn't set in yet, her body is faintly warm... Around 3 to 4 hours."
Jane nodded her head and talked with her partners for a bit, before heading back to the station shortly after. Maura sighed inwardly as she saw Jane leave. There was still so much more to say.
'Should I immediately broach the subject and dive right in? Or should I ease into it to avoid scaring her more than I already have?'
She shook the thoughts from her head... for now.
After signing the usual paperwork, the crime scene was fully processed and everything was sent back to the lab.