Bella Swan tried to concentrate on the 2009 calendar on her desk, the appointments neatly scrawled in her handwriting. She really did, however, the noise from the main office was distracting borderline maddening.
Tyler was doing his annual Elvis impersonation. It was a Christmas office party tradition Bella had unfortunately become accustomed to, Tyler's version of "Blue Christmas" which was sung very badly yet with a hefty dose of enthusiasm. With a sign, she pushed back from her desk and stood to go to the main office. After all, this was a once-a-year event.
She opened her door to see the office Christmas party in full swing with Tyler taking the spotlight on Angela's desk decked out in the white jumpsuit and black wig. As he sung, he would sensually caress the scarf around his neck.
Despite being off key, the performance itself was great. Tyler had the sensual sneer and rotating pelvic thrusts down pat. And the crowd loved it, encouraging him to continue. Bella shook her head-she thought her coworkers would be more discriminating in their reactions considering they worked at Black or White Records, one of the leading recording companies in Nashville, Tennessee.
All eyes were on Tyler including Bella's which was why she didn't see Jasper Blue Whitlock approach her until it was too late for her to retreat back in her office without making a scene. His eyes locked with hers and with a few strides of his long legs, he was standing near her.
Bella had suddenly become aware that her professional gray suit was drab compared to the festive apparel worn by the other women in the office.
"I thought you were going to spend the entire time in your office," Jasper said as he handed her a cup of punch. He has been watching, she now knew. This good-looking man had been watching and waiting for her to emerge from her office. And boy, was Jasper good looking. His dirty blond locks were long enough to hang on his brow. His smoky gray eyes were set in a face that was handsome and masculine. He was lithe and tanned, a product of his Texas upbringing. He, too, was not dressed in Christmas apparel, instead he wore his familiar worn blue jeans and black cowboy boots. Even if he couldn't sing-and boy, could he sing-Jasper was going to be a star.
And that was the problem.
"I couldn't possibly miss Tyler's annual performance," Bella replied coolly.
Jasper winced as his A&R butchered the King's memory. This was Jasper's first Christmas with Black and White Records and the first time he heard Tyler sing. "If I had known about this, I would have never cut this song for my album."
It had been Tyler's idea for Jasper's Christmas album, appropriate due to his name. The first time Bella had heard it, she knew "Legs," Jasper's first album and single, had not been a fluke. That song had been played repetitively on nearly every radio station and featured a denim-clad Jasper, his guitar Maria, and a handful of women with appropriately highlighted appendages. "Legs" made Jasper famous but "Blue Christmas" was quickly making him a star. Not only did Jasper Blue Whitlock look good in a pair of jeans but he could sing like nobody's business. Due to the success of his Christmas album, Tyler was already talking ballads for his next album.
Leaning in close to Bella, Jasper whispered, "I have an idea. How 'bout you and I leave Tyler here in Nashville and you can come with me to L.A. next week?"
In a room full of people, it suddenly felt to Bella as if only she and Jasper existed. His voice had a way of distancing the two of them from the crowd, strong and comforting. Bella felt like a teenager, the butterflies-in-the-stomach and the flustered feelings he enlisted every time he approached her. Her legs shook and her heartbeat became erratic and frantic. However, she refused to let her voice betray her.
"No thanks," she replied coolly, "I'm sure Tyler has plans for you I'm Hollywood."
"That's what I'm afraid of."
It was only a small cameo in a western he had recorded a song for but Tyler was looking to forward Jasper's career.
"Do you know what he's bought me now? A frock coat and blue silk dress shirt. I swear, where does he come up with these ideas?"
Frustrated, Bella sighed. "What do you expect, Blue? You denied the leather pants and sequined jacket, the beaded shirt and ten-gallon hat, and that..." She moved her hands unable to verbally describe the other strange ensemble Tyler had picked out. "…other thing. Just say, 'Thanks but no thanks.'"
"I tried but I think I had hurt his feelings."
"Tyler doesn't have any feelings."
At that moment, said man launched into "Hound Dog" and Angela gave a rather feminine scream. Jasper winced.
"How 'bout we go somewhere quieter, hmm?" He gently yet firmly steered Bella back into her office. Bella backed back into her chair, placing her desk between her and the man who closed them inside the office.
"Much better." Jasper turned to face Bella. "So, I have a favor I'd like to ask."
Bella cocked her eyebrow. "A favor?"
Not deterred, Jasper smiled that aw-shucks smile, his Blue smile as she called it privately. "My family's coming in town for Christmas tomorrow: my four brothers, sister, and my parents."
"And?"
"And, I had told my mama that my lady is looking forward to meeting them."
"You had to?"
He nodded. "Yes, ma'am. She was worried about me being her alone."
Bella shook her head. "You're 32 years old, Blue. And you're mama's worried about you?"
He shrugged. "She's my mama. And as the oldest, I'm the one being smothered with her concern about making an 'honest man' out of me."
"And what does that have to do with me?"
"Well, I was hoping—"
Seeing where he was going with this, Bella shook her head. "No way, Blue. You have thousands of women who would kill to pose as your girlfriend. Find one of them."
"That won't work, Bella. You see, I had already told my mama that my lady was a brunette with red highlights and chocolate brown eyes in a peach-toned face. She's about 5'4" and has the most brilliant smile this side of the Mississippi. She's also works at Black or White Records…"
His voice faded as he kept eye contact with her. Bella felt her heart pound but pushed that aside.
"I can't believe…why would you…" she stuttered. "Why didn't you just send a picture?"
"I did. Remember the office picture we took? I stood next to you and at the last minute threw my arm across your shoulder. It was a really good picture…"
"Blue!"
"Look, you have to understand. Ever since I moved her from Texas, Mama has been inquirin' about any lady friends I had. She wanted to know if I was dating any of 'those nice girls' in the "Legs" music video."
"And you decided to tell her about me instead?'
"Yes." He nodded firmly. "Bella, I had to tell her the truth; there was only one lady on my mind and this said feisty brunette was the inspiration for that song."
Bella felt her face flush. "You're lying."
Jasper shook his head. "Nope. You probably don't remember, but my first day here at the office, Tyler was introducing me to everyone. I had only been in Nashville for two days and was feelin' slightly overwhelmed. Then, I saw you. You were wearin' that sexy little skirt which had ridden up slightly when you had sat upon Angela's desk…"
Bella flushed even more.
"…And I looked at Tyler and said, 'Damn, those are the finest legs I've ever seen.' And he told me to keep my opinions to myself because you wouldn't appreciate it. So I just smiled, introduced myself, and as soon as I got back to my hotel room, I wrote "Legs" on the hotel stationary."
"You lie."
"Naw, not to you, sugah, not to you."
He paused and both looked at each other. Then Jasper breathed in deep.
"Come on, Bella, it's just one day."
Still reeling from his confession, she asked, "How do you know I don't have plans?"
Pausing, he replied honestly, "I didn't. Do you?"
Satisfied, she said, "Yes, I do. I plan on making a stir fry, popping open a bottle of wine, and sitting down to watch It's a Wonderful Life."
"So…you have no plans?"
"Blue, those are my plans."
"But, you could really help me out, Bella."
"No. Sorry, but I have my day planned out."
There was a pause. Bella watched Jasper as he appeared lost in thought.
"Well, if you decide to change your mind, you can come over."
Bella rolled her eyes. "I won't."
"But…" he drawled out, looking at her with that panty-wetting smile.
"But, if I do—and I won't—I know where you live."
"Do you?"
She nodded. "I have the directions from when you had your housewarming party." In my glove box inside my car manual behind the flashlight.
"Which you didn't come to."
She shrugged her shoulders. "I got busy and lost track of time." In reality, she had procrastinated and procrastinated, making up excuse after excuse not to show up. She knew she could not handle being that close to him in a non-professional context.
"The offer still stands." Jasper stared at her for a little bit longer. "Goodnight, Bella." Then he left her office.
A few moments later, Bella, too, left her office, leaning in her office's doorway to watch the party. Tyler had finished his performance and was making rounds among his fans, all of whom were in good, cheerful moods. Lucky them, Bella thought. And in Bella's eyes, they were lucky, lucky they never had to spend Christmas with her family. Between the constant smothering of her stepmother, her father's silence, and her stepsister's bitchiness in the morning and then her mother's absentmindedness and her stepfather's inappropriate jokes in the afternoon, Bella was completely stripped of the Christmas spirit. Last year had been the worse—burnt turkey, raw fish, Leah's bitchiness, Phil's inappropriate jokes, and her mother's cluelessness—and Bella swore to herself that next Christmas, she'll stay home. And as she had kissed her mother's cheek, she was determined to follow through with that plan. And no matter how handsome he was, Jasper Blue Whitlock was not going to change her mind.
Bella continued to stare at her coworkers. She watched as Mike made a fool of himself as Jessica squealed and Lauren flirted with Eric. She saw Angela, her best friend and cohort at Black or White Records, point a brilliant sparkly red nail, matching her ensemble, into Jasper's chest as Tyler spun him around to face Bella. Angela then pointed above Bella's head. That slow, sexy Blue smile appeared. A feeling of dread and adrenaline ran through Bella's veins as she lifted her head.
Mistletoe.
Jasper made his way back to Bella until they were standing toe to toe. Huskily he whispered, "It's tradition." And giving her only a moment to take in what he said, he swooped down and captured her lips with his.
The kiss was intoxicated, warm, exhilarating, and overwhelming. It was everything she dreamed and everything she feared. The room and everyone in it no longer existed; it was just her and Blue. Right before she let go completely, he ended the kiss, his breathing ragged. Looking in her eyes, he reached up and plucked the mistletoe. He placed it in her hand.
"I'm a patient man, sugah, but I can't be havin' men line up to kiss you."
Bella tried to get a hold of herself and reclaim her breath.
He squeezed her hand.
"Tomorrow?"
After a moment, Bella shook her head. "No way, Blue."
The passion left his eyes and he looked resigned. "Have a happy holiday, Bella."
He made his rounds, wishing everyone a pleasant holiday and a good night. Bella watched him go before heading back into her office. She didn't get to restart her work because Angela came in and closed the door behind her.
"Girl, if I had a man like Jasper kiss me, he wouldn't have left here alone."
Bella shook her head, smiling slightly. "Now, what would Ben have to say about that?" she gently reminded Angela of her husband.
Angela waved her hand in dismissal. "If I wasn't madly in love with my husband, but I think he would understand the situation if I explained it to him."
Bella laughed.
Angela glared. "Let's not talk about me and my husband. Let's talk about you. Bella, why won't you just give that man a chance?"
Bella sighed deeply. "Angie, you know that I don't—"
"…date musicians. I know, I know, you keep saying that."
"I say it because I mean it."
"But what about that date?"
"It wasn't a date." And that was what Bella stuck to; it was only two people going out to eat and listen to great music at the Bluebird Café and then explore Opry Mills. It was just one night out and did not mean anything, Bella swore later to all who asked; it was not a date.
Angela saw the lie as it was but just shook her head. "You gonna come by tomorrow?"
Bella declined, not wanting to intrude on her friend and her family, and began gathering her things so she could head home. It was then that she realized she still held the mistletoe in her had which she slipped into her jacket pocket.
"Bye, Angie."
"Bye, Bella. And merry Christmas."
Bella gave a soft laugh. "You too."
Arriving at her apartment thirty minutes later, Bella came across her elderly neighbor, Ms. Cope, all bundled up.
"You're heading out, Ms. Cope?"
The woman smiled at her young neighbor. "I sure am. My son's packing my bags in his car right now. Get to spend time with him, his wife, and those lovely grandbabies of mine. And you, Isabella, are you still staying here?"
Bella nodded. "Yes, ma'am."
The woman shook her head. "I wish you wouldn't, but it's your decision. Oh! Hold on a minute!" Ms. Cope went back into her apartment and reappeared a few minutes later with a covered plate. "Homemade snickerdoodles just for you, hon."
Bella accepted gracefully and thanked her. The elevator dinged and Ms. Cope's son stepped out. Bella smiled at him and they exchanged greetings.
"Have a safe trip."
"And you have a blessed Christmas, Isabella," Ms. Cope smiled.
Bella entered her apartment after they got onto the elevator, placing her jacket on the rack near the door. She then laid the cookies down by the small Christmas tree she had on the kitchen counter. The only presents were from her mother Renee and stepfather Phil and her father Charlie and stepmother Sue, both of which Bella promised each set of parents that she would not open until Christmas.
Bella then showered, got dressed in her comfortable pajamas, and sat in her comfortable chair to watch A Charlie Brown Christmas with a few of Ms. Cope's cookies. Charlie Brown had just set off to find a Christmas tree when Bella dozed off.
"Wake up, Isabella."
Groaning, Bella slowly woke up. She blinked in surprise as she found herself in her office. Glancing at her desk, with a shock she noticed the date: December 2012. There were fewer appointments written down as well. The muffled sounds of the Christmas party were in the background.
"Good. You're awake."
At the sound, Bella glanced towards her filing cabinet where Ms. Cope sat in a plain white dress.
"Ms. Cope?"
"Now, hush, dearie. We don't have much time. I have to explain a few things before you can continue."
"Explain, what?"
The older woman, seeming much stronger than she had when she wished Bella a good holiday earlier that night (Was it that night? Or three years ago?), continued on. "You are three years in the future and many things have changed. Black or White Records is not doing so well and many of those people out there celebrating will find themselves without a job by the year's end. Jasper's album, On the Edge, was a complete flop and his failing career has impacted the company greatly."
"Wait, what?"
Before Bella could continue her line of questioning, Ms. Cope held up her hand and turned to face the door. Nodding to herself, she faced the confused young woman. "Time's up," she announced just as Bella's office door opened and Angela rushed in.
"Bella," she said, "you can't hide in here the entire night."
Bella heard the words but was focused on Angela's very round stomach. Seeing where her friend's eyes were, Angela huffed and said angrily, "Yes, I'm huge. I've been hearing that for the past few months, but if I hear one more comment about how I'm going to give birth to twins or a fully grown three year old, I'm going to cry!" By the end of her rant, Angela had angry tears in her eyes.
Quickly Bella got up and soothed her friend. "I wasn't going to say anything except…how much I really like you Rudolph sweater," she lied.
Sniffling, Angela asked, "Really?"
Bella nodded.
Angela took a few deep breaths. "Okay then. But you still have to come out. You can't keep hiding every time Jasper brings that wife," she sneered, "around."
Wife? Bella felt her heart stop. Blue's married? Not able to wrap her mind around that thought, Bell tuned back into what Angela was saying.
"…I mean, come on, no one likes her—and haven't since Jasper brought her back from that Hollywood cameo a few years ago—and she is a mega bitch, but you can't let her know that she has power over you, Bella."
Bella nodded in a daze and followed her friend out to the Christmas party. The familiar sight calmed Bella until a flash of silver caught her eye. Seven feet away in six-inch heels, a flapper-style short mini dress, pixie haircut, and overly done makeup and breast implants stood someone new. Angie looked towards where Bella's attention was and clicked her tongue. "There's that heifer," Angie whispered.
Swallowing her pride and heartache, Bella whispered, "Whatever makes Blue happy."
Angie snorted. "Please, she's made him miserable and we all know it." She then excused herself to the bathroom.
The woman turned and met Bella's gaze with one of absolute loathing. Excusing herself from Lauren and Jessica, she made her way over to Bella.
"Ms. Swan."
Bella gulped. "Mrs. Whitlock."
Alice Whitlock smirked. "Well, I was wondering when you were going to show your face."
At that point, Tyler's office door slammed open and a gaunt looking Jasper stormed out. People stopped and stared at his angry expression.
"Alice, let's go!"
He went towards his wife, his steps slowing when he realized that Bella was near. He lowered his voice, "Come on, Alice," and grabbed her arm.
Snatching herself from his hold, Alice smirked. "Now, now, darling, the party's not over yet. And you haven't even announced our big surprise."
Leaning in close, Jasper whispered so only Bella and Alice heard him. "I think you've had a little too much to drink. Let's go."
"No." Alice took a step back. "In fact, I happen to know of another party that is a whole lot better than this…" she trailed off as she glanced disapprovingly at her surroundings, "and I'll go there while you give Ms. Swan the good news, okay, baby?" She patted his arm and kissed his cheek. Turning towards the door, she sauntered her way out. The party resumed but on a more subdued level with Tyler having closed himself back into his office.
Jasper sighed deeply and ran his hand through his hair before meeting Bella's gaze.
"You look horrible," the words slipped from her mouth. And he did. His eyes were dull and he seemed to have aged twenty years.
Laughing darkly, Jasper replied, "Yeah, well, you know how it is."
But she didn't. She should have but the only knowledge she had about the past three years was what Ms. Cope and Angie had told her. Bella just shrugged in response.
"I need a drink." Jasper took her hand and, as they walked by the refreshment, he grabbed two plastic cups and his jacket as he led Bella to the elevators. She dug in her heels, having been shaken from her stupor.
"Blue, where are we going?"
The question stopped Jasper in his tracks and he turned to look at her. "You haven't called me that in years." He laughed darkly. "Let's face it; you haven't called me anything in years." He looked at her. "We're just gonna sit in the pickup and talk."
Bella started to shake her head but stopped when he squeezed the hand he was still holding. "Please, Bella, I gotta talk to someone."
Bella paused and, after squeezing his hand, followed him to his truck.
It was freezing outside and, by the time they reached Jasper's black 1993 Ford F-150 XL, Jasper had taken off his heavy jacket and placed it on Bella's shoulders. The truck was high so Jasper had to lift Bella up onto the seat. She scooted over as far as she could as Jasper brought his 6'5" frame into the cab before shutting the door.
He reached over her, his hand glazing her breasts lightly, to reach the glove box and pulled out a bottle of Jack Daniel's. He poured some in the two cups and passed Bella hers. Raising his cup, he said, "Happy friggin' Christmas," before downing his drink. Bella refused to drink to such a toast and so remained silent and watched as he refilled his cup.
Bella watched him drink in silence. She knew that the music business would change him, but she never imaged it would be like this. He seemed jaded, like the weight of the world was on his shoulders and it was dragged him down more and more as time passed.
"Do you know why I still drive this truck?" he asked suddenly.
Bella shook her head.
"Because Alice hates it." He chuckled. "My social-status-climbing wife hates it and prefers we use her new Mercedes Benz. Can't have anyone important see her in this 'dump'. So I insist we take it when we go out."
Bella said nothing. It was a petty thing, something her Blue never would have done, and judging by the look in his eyes, he was agreeing with her.
"So, what's the big news?" She didn't want to talk about his wife.
Finishing his third drink, Jasper placed the cup on the dashboard. "I quit," he mumbled.
"What?"
He looked at her. "I quit. I'm gonna head back to Texas and Dad's ranch and leave this music business behind."
Bella was shocked. "But, you love music."
He shook his head. "I used to, but ain't there no more."
"Sure, it is—"
"No, Bella, it ain't. Tyler knows it, the fans know it, even I know it. I haven't loved it in so long. That's why Over the Edge isn't selling." He faced away from her. "If I'd stayed in Texas and worked on Dad's ranch and rodeoed when I felt like it and played gigs on the weekends then maybe I might still have it, still love it. But right now, I don't care if I ever touch another guitar as long as I live."
She had expected him to say this in anger; the calmness of his voice and tone scared the living hell out of her.
"I'm so sorry."
He smiled, very close to the Blue smile she was more familiar with. "You should be, Bella Swan, because you're the reason I stayed in Nashville to begin with."
Her stomach did a little flip and a blush swept across her face.
"That's ridiculous."
"Is it?" His smile faded. "Tyler had listened in on me one weekend and immediately started making plans to get me here. I figured it was a free trip and I could always decline and come back home—you know how hard it is to make it in this business—, and that was my plan, except…" he paused before continuing, "except I saw you. I told you a few years ago about you sitting there on Angela's desk?"
Bella nodded.
"I went back to my hotel and wrote "Legs" for you and decided to stay." Darkness clouded his face. "Of course, that was before I knew that Bella Swan didn't date musicians."
It was silent once again and Bella felt the darkness and cold sweep through her, almost suffocating her in its intensity.
"I never told you why," she whispered.
He turned back to her. "Why what?"
"Why I don't date musicians." She expected him to say that he didn't care, that it was too late, but he surprised her by asking why.
So she told him. She told him about Kyle and how he was an up-and-coming musician and how he swept her off her feet. She told him about them moving in together and making plans towards marriage, with her working three jobs so he could focus on his music. She concluded, "Then, a couple of weeks after his big break, he was gone. Took everything but my clothes and a chair he didn't like."
"One guy fucks up…"
She interrupted Jasper. "He was a musician; here today, gone tomorrow. I wasn't going to put myself through that again."
Jasper leaned in towards her. "If you want me to hogtie him up and drag his ass behind my pickup, just say the word."
She gave a teary laugh. "No thanks. Last I heard, he was selling cars at a used car dealership."
Jasper shook his head. There was a short silence before he broke it. "You judged me because of his actions."
Bella shook her head. "I couldn't go through that again."
"But I'm not him."
"But you don't know what the future will bring."
"True, but all I needed was just one shot to prove you wrong."
"I know." And she did.
They stayed silent in the truck then she breaks the tension. "So, Texas, huh?"
"Yep."
"I can't believe that's the big news Alice was happy about."
Jasper laughed, his true laugh topped with that Blue smile that she loved so much. "My wife thinks we're going back to L.A. She'll be going back there, alone, and with divorce papers."
Bella raised an eyebrow.
He explained. "She and my mama don't get along and Alice is too prissy to survive as a rancher's wife. And, if you read the tabloids, you'll know that my marriage is up shit creek."
He reached and stroked her face. "When I get back to Texas, and the divorce is final…"
Knowing where he was going, Bella smiled. "I'll visit you."
He smiled. "Just a visit?"
She smiled wider. "A chance for you to change my mind."
His hand grasped the back of her neck and he pulled her close.
This kiss was even more intense than the first one they shared. It was fire and ice and overwhelming and not enough. It consumed her and soon hands were roaming and Bella found herself straddling Jasper. His hand cupped her breast and hers were roaming his chest. He broke away.
"I will prove you wrong." Another searing kiss.
"I will be the man for you." And another.
"We won't fuck up this time." And another.
As he spoke he was guiding her to lie down on the cab's seat. Before her back touched it, the passenger door flew open.
"Well, well, well. What do we have here?"
Jasper sat up abruptly bringing Bella with him. Alice stood by the open door looking extremely pissed.
"Do you know why I'm not all that surprised to find you with my husband, Ms. Swan?" Before Bella could say anything, Alice ranted on. "I'm going to let you in on a little secret: when Jasper comes home late drunk—and believe me, it's a nearly nightly occurrence—he'll grab me in the middle of the night while he whispers YOUR NAME AND IT PISSES ME OFF!" She called down, "And so, you have to go." Alice pulled her hand out of her pocket revealing the gun she had there.
"Goodbye, Ms. Swan."
She pulled the trigger but not before Jasper spun around, taking the bullet that was meant for Bella. Both women screamed. Bella tried to hold onto Jasper as he slipped form her arms. He mouthed out words no one could hear.
"Blue! Don't, oh God, Jasper, don't!"
'I love you,' he mouthed again.
"NOOO! No! No!"
Bella vaguely heard pounding footsteps as others came to help but her focus was on her Blue, her Jasper, whose light had left his eyes and whose breath had left his body.
She cradled his head to her chest and rocked back and forth, her whispered pleads so light in the dark, cold night.
"Please, oh God, please."
