In the Dark
Plot: AU. Harry lives with Sirius and Remus at Grimmauld Place. The Weasleys have moved in and the Order of the Phoenix meets at the dingy house. Even while living there, Dumbledore is avoiding Harry and isn't allowing Sirius to tell his godson anything. Frustrated after being denied information again, Harry goes for a walk and gets attacked by a dementor.
A/N: So this is rated T because of the attack and because of a couple of swear words towards the end. I'd like to say now - sorry if the words bother you but I for one cussed when I was fifteen and so does just about every other teenager I know. Anyways (it's really only two words) I do hope you enjoy this. Again, I'm beginning to write more AU!
Please let me know what you think of my AU-ness and what you think of this one shot! Thank you for reading and I'm looking forward to hearing what you guys think!
Disclaimer: I'm neither British nor blonde; therefore I am not J.K. Rowling.
I slammed the door behind me and Sirius ripped it back open as I jumped over the steps and onto the narrow path. I could hear the portrait of Sirius's mother screaming from inside the house - good, I hope she keeps screaming and they get pissed off, I thought bitterly. They deserve to be pissed off, it's not fair that I'm the only one ever mad in that house.
"Harry James Potter!" Sirius yelled, clearly frustrated. I hated that our relationship is now strained, but he's treating me just like everyone else is.
"I'll be back in an hour!" I yelled, not looking back at him. It wasn't until I was across the street and I heard my godfather slam the door shut again, sending Walburga into another fit.
I know now, with a little guilty satisfaction, that I have officially pissed off Sirius. I suppose Remus is pissed now as well, and most likely Moody simply because I piss him off every time I talk about the Order.
I can't get myself to genuinely care, though. I can't even get myself to completely like them anymore - I'm always angry, always on breaking point. Nobody listens to me and nobody tells me what is happening in my life. I only get to read the Prophet because Sirius yelled at Dumbledore himself for that, "You can't keep him from reading what they're saying about him, too, Albus!"
I didn't realize how fast I was walking until I found myself at a small muggle park about a mile and a half away from Number 12. It was deserted, thankfully, and I plopped down on a swing.
My breaths were jagged from my anger and also because of hose fast I had walked here. I sat on the swing for a half an hour probably, trying to calm my breathing.
I've recently decided that I hate people. I shared it with Sirius one morning that it was just the two of us eating breakfast, he had laughed at first, but then his smile slowly faded. He knew I was bring serious, which I think worried him. Ever since I left Hogwarts I have been attacked by the Prophet and I have been told less and less.
I'm in arguments every days, multiple times a day with a lot of the people in the house. More recently it's been with Sirius - and Remus there as well, defending Sirius as he always did - because of the cut. At least this past month I have been getting a little more. Dumbledore, though, who I've recently decided I'm not too fond of either, got in a heated discussion with Sirius about what he's been telling me.
And now I get nothing.
Luckily, though, Sirius has promised me that he relayed our feelings to the Headmaster.
I sighed, glancing at my watch and seeing that it was time for me to leave. Not that they would notice me being late.
I took my time walking home considering I had left with spare time, kicking the rocks that were in my path. I stood off to the side of a large group of people who were standing on the corner of the side walk, waiting for the cross light to turn green. When it did, the corner cleared and I rounded the corner.
I entered the alley tunnel and began my long journey down it. This was the quickest way back to Grimmauld Place, and I was happy that nobody else was in the tunnel.
About half way down the tunnel, the lights along the sides went out. A sick feeling swelled into my stomach at once and goose bumps jumped to the surface of skin. An icy air blew passed me and I pulled my wand out of my back pocket.
I forced myself to continue walking. I kept looking behind me and in front of me, my breathing shallow. I could feel the dementor's presence before I saw them. My body began to shake and I could see my breath.
A freezing gust of wind blew from behind me and I turned, listening closely.
No... They can't be here... Not in muggle-London... Who would send them here -? My question gets left in midair as I fell.
I don't know how I slipped, I hadn't moved, but my wand flew out of my sweaty hand. I gasped when my head made contact with the hard ground. I scrambled backwards like a crab and tried to search for my wand. They were getting closer... I could it...
A high pitched laugh echoed in my head. "Lumos!" I shouted out of desperation. The tip of my wand lit from my right and I snatched it up, "Expecto Patronum!"
A silvery wisp of vapor shot from the tip of my wand and towards the dementor. It slowed, and then faltered. The spell didn't work - I couldn't do it.
A grey, slimy, scabbed hand slid from the robes, reaching for me. They were aiming for my neck but I backed up more.
"Expecto Patronum!" I yelled. The patronus more feeble than the last and died out at my feet. I was gasping for breath now, trying to concentrate on something happy and get away from the dementor at the same time.
There was laughter in my head again; shrill and high pitched. I could smell the dementor's putrid, death-cold breath filling my lungs. I felt like I was drowning - I was trying to think of something happy... but nothing is coming. There's no happiness in me anymore... The dementor's hands were on my throat now, closing tightly and surely leaving marks. Maybe I'll just let it happen... Maybe it would be painless... I'm never going to see Ron or Hermione or Sirius again -
Their faces broke clearly through my mind. I fought for breath and managed, "EXPECTO PATRONUM!"
An enormous silver stag burst from my wand and charged the dementors. They swooped away, thrown backwards; weightless as darkness itself.
My wand dropped to my side and I sat there, drenched in sweat and unable to get a steady breath out of my body. I have to get home, I told myself. Can I even walk right now?
I pushed myself up on to my knees and then to my feet. I balanced against the tunnel wall for a minute before making my journey to Grimmauld Place. I took much longer than I normally would, still weak from the dementors.
When I could finally see the unwelcoming homes, I felt my shoulders droop in relief. I walked across the street to the grass patch, then across the next street. I came to a stop in front of where the house is supposed to be, then thought of the address hard.
The Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix may be found at number twelve, Grimmauld Place, London.
I leaned against the railing as I walked up the steps, and then carefully pressed the door open. Silently, I walked through the dark, smelly hall and down to the basement kitchen. I could hear distinct talking and I knew that there was an Order meeting going on. With a grimace, I knocked on the door.
The voices died out immediately.
"We're nearly done," came Mrs. Weasleys voice, ever so determined to keep us out of what was going on. I heard Moody say something that sounded like he was saying it's me.
"It's important," I said. There was some muttering - I ran out over an hour ago and I'm back with 'important' news?
"Can I have five minutes?" Sirius called back, sounding a little hopeful and I knew he was thinking I'd explode and leave again.
"No."
"Harry," he sounded frustrated now. "In five minutes you will have all the time to -"
"In five minutes I'll be expelled from Hogwarts," I said, quite a bit louder than I had just been speaking. "You guys might as well listen to that Howler for me, though, I suppose. I'm not supposed to know anything that goes in my life anyways, am I?"
Without taking another breath I turned on my heel and stormed up the stairs. I heard the kitchen door burst open and I rounded the landing to the second landing as I heard at least three people running up the stairs. Half way up the second flight, I felt a hand grab my elbow. As soon as the hand touched me, I felt a shock shoot through my body and I turned to see Sirius gasp and pull his hand away.
He stared at his hand for a couple of seconds and Remus was immediately asking me questions.
"What do you mean by 'expelled'?"
"I broke the Secrecy or whatever."
"How?"
"Using magic."
Remus looked very annoyed with my lack of information.
"Why did you use magic, Harry?" Sirius asked in a low voice, also seeming annoyed.
Moody and Tonks were standing at the bottom of the stairs and Mrs. Weasley was balanced on the first couple of steps. Mr. Weasley was higher up than his wife but behind Remus and then Sirius - still looking just as urgent as the others. Probably because he works at the Ministry.
"Because a couple of dementors felt the need to attack me, if you actually care," I snapped. "And I didn't particularly feel like getting my soul sucked out at the moment, so I produced a patronus. Maybe I should have though," I added fiercely. "Then you guys wouldn't have to be so secretive and maybe I could get an idea of what's going on -"
Harry stopped himself from continuing at the sight of his godfather. Sirius face had turned and ugly red and he looked as though he could hit Harry.
"It's not our choice to not tell you anything -"
"And it wasn't my choice to have Voldemort want to kill me," I retorted, silencing Remus. "I'm sorry that I just want to know what's going to be happening to me."
"We don't know what dementors are doing in London, boy," Moody called.
"He has a name." It was such an automatic response that Sirius didn't even realize he had said it. Harry had told him some - most - of his upbringing with the Dursleys and knew that 'Boy' is what Harry went by for years.
"Well, Harry was not attacked by dementors on our accord," Moody went on. "If he hadn't gone storming off -"
"You mean if you hadn't been talking about how I could be involved in something and then shut up right as I walk in?" I shouted. I could feel my face flush and Remus stepped back a little bit - Sirius and Remus have told him that he has a mix of his parent's tempers. "I'm sorry that not knowing what Voldemort has in store for me gets me a bit riled, Moody. This 'constant vigilance'? That's complete and utter bullshit. How am I supposed to be constantly vigilant if I don't even know what the fuck is going to happen to me?"
He had never sworn in front of Mrs. Weasley before and felt guilty for ruining his well-mouthed image that she has of him, but he was so furious that he couldn't dwell on it. Sirius had heard him swear the last time they had argued, Remus when he nearly broken his toe hitting it against an oak chest.
Harry turned and stomped up another step, leaving the adults frozen in his wake, but stopped suddenly. An owl had flown down the stairs from an upstairs window - probably the twins - and dropped a Howler in front of Harry.
Dear Mr. Potter,
We have received intelligence that you performed the Patronus Charm at twenty-three minutes past nine this evening in a Muggle-inhabited area.
The severity of this breach of the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery has resulted in your expulsion from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Ministry representatives will be calling at your place of residence shortly to destroy your wand.
As you have already received an official warning for a previous offence under Section 13 of the International Confederation of Warlocks' Statute of Secrecy, we regret to inform you that your presence is required at a disciplinary hearing at the Ministry of Magic at 9 a.m. on the twelfth of August.
Hoping you are well,
Yours sincerely,
Mafalda Hopkirk
Improper Use of Magic Office
Ministry of Magic
"We won't let them take your wand," Mr. Weasley said at once.
"I'll contact Albus," growled Moody, stomping back down to the basement kitchen.
"What, now you guys believe me?" I laughed bitterly, turning to look at them.
Sirius was staring where the Howler had just been and Remus, Mrs. Weasley, and Tonks were all gazing up at me - slightly sympathetically.
"Of course we believe you," Mrs. Weasley said fearfully, obviously a little still taken aback by Harry's outburst.
"Now that the Ministry as acknowledged your use of magic, we need to find out why they did not know that dementors were there," Remus told him.
"Well I'll be upstairs," I told them. "Don't worry about telling me anything."
The twins, Ron, Hermione and Ginny were all standing on the next landing when I reached them. Then passed them without looking back. I walked straight into my room, which I was currently sharing with Ron, and slammed the door very hard behind me, flopping face-first down on my bed.
The door, which I apparently broke and was now hanging open oddly, allowed me to hear what was going on.
"George - go... go back upstairs. We're going to be busy for a little while now," Mrs. Weasley said after I heard someone walking down the steps.
"I am going upstairs," he said, and sounded angry. "I just wanted to read the Howler myself.. You know, see if Harry Potter is really expelled from Hogwarts - you know, the guy who most deserves it and most deserves to be happy and not have bad things happen to him."
"Yeah," his twin added, and I could tell by his tone that Sirius and Remus were still there. "Maybe we'll write the Ministry and tell them that they are stupid and we hate them. That they need to control their dementors from attacking innocent teens."
All five of the other teenagers came into Harry's room at once. Fred fixed the door and then slammed it again for affect, though obviously not as hard has Harry had. Ron and Hermione sat down on bed while the other three took Ron's. Hermione's hand was on the center of his back and was pressing comfortingly on his spine.
"Harry, they'll sort it out," Hermione whispered.
"I don't care anymore, Hermione," I told her, my voice muffled by my pillow. "I don't care."