Yea... so...

I wanted to write something for Eva. And I wanted to write something for .hack

And I've been playing .hack/GU lately.

And I was like, looking forever for some way to write it. I was going to do it with Shinji playing the game just in general. But then I was like, hey, Haseo in /roots is mopey. Shinji is mopey. In GU he becomes a jerk because he's constantly on edge tormented by his quest to be strong and get Shino back but if not for that he'd just be antisocial... and... mopey...

...waaait a second.

.Eva/G.U. Idea chapter.

It's been eight months now. Eight months since I left the twilight brigade.

Eight months since Ovan told me that I wasn't what he was looking for, after all. And that, in fact, there was no need for the Key of Twilight either. There was no need for anything. CC corp had 'fixed everything' and so Ovan simply left.

It's been eight months since I realized that 'she' would never look at me the way she looked at him. No matter what I did.

The brigade was disbanded. I lost my place to be. Again.

Ovan abandoned me, just like my father.

I almost felt it coming.

I have acquaintances – Tabby likes to stay in touch – but no one really close. I thought Shino…

But that had been an illusion.

So I fill up my days wandering around this game, listlessly building my character. My wealth. My worth.

Knowing it will never be enough to make 'her' look twice.

I hear words one day, broadcasted in the field: "Welcome to 'The World'."

Those words mean a lot to me, but they can be said in two ways.

Gently.

Cruelly.

And if it's ever the latter, then I get involved.

My name is Ikari Shinji. I'm just a nobody who's dad was too busy working to raise me.

My in-game name is Haseo. People call me 'The Terror of Death'.

This is what I do.

I cut the edge punisher down. He has the slowness of his class, and he doesn't know at all how to hedge that with skill.

A dual-blade attacks me from the left with a skill. Hasty. Stupid.

I let him dash in, and execute a counter-Reigeki. I do this not because I'm worried about any real damage from his attack, or from even being counter-Reigeki'ed by his remaining ally.

But it would be insulting to be hit by these people.

My pride… might be pretty hollow. But it's what I have. And their pride is even more fraudulent than mine. That much I know.

The last one says she gives up. Then she attacks with her thorned, curved sword.

Whatever.

In the end they lie sprawled on the floor, never having even touched me. I take down their IGNs, in case I run into them again.

I hate PKs like this. I PKK them no matter what. Sometimes I hunt them down.

They're just bad people. They use their strength to prey on the weak. I think that when they're not playing 'The World' they do the same thing in real life.

Maybe they do it to me.

I can never tell.

But I can't handle the PKers in real life. I can't fight back against the people taking advantage of me there.

So I fight them here, where I'm stronger. I fight them on others behalf. It's all I can do. I protect.

"Um, tha-thank you."

I blink. "Shino?"

"Huh?"

I look at her, the girl I saved from those PKs. She looks… just like Shino. Her Avatar.

The differences stop there. Shino was… more of a lady. She held herself with maturity and calm.

This… 'Atoli' seems… tentative. Almost… apologetic for even being alive.

"I'm Haseo." I find myself saying. "Welcome… to 'The World'".

I stare down at the photograph. It's… kind of lewd.

Father, just what have you been doing…

Is your work really that important, that you had to drop me like dead weight?

Even though you hire someone this silly…

Phone's not working. Great.

And then I see it.

It's… I swear I saw a monster like this in game. I think it started showing up around level 30.

It liked to spam Repth and it couldn't be staggered. God it was annoying.

Wait. No.

What the hell's it doing in real life?

And so huge!

Oh my god!

A blue car spins to a stop beside me, knocking me out of my stupor.

"Sorry! Get in!" The driver declares.

It's the silly lady. She just did a 180-degree stop maneuver, almost ramming me and – despite the apology – I get the feeling she's not really remorseful in the least. She's wearing a gaudy pair of shades shamelessly – the type that makes you wonder if they're really shades and not some kind of visor.

There's a giant lvl 30 monster behind me, being blasted by helicopters and, apparently, pwning everything in sight.

They say truth is stranger than fiction, but I never really thought 'The World' would loose out to the world in terms of classical rpg story elements.

Yet here I am.

A woman… in a swimsuit… and a lab coat.

Eccentric professor? Mad scientist? Hot scientist?

Is she going to start giving me quests, or a steam-bike, or what?

"Why? Why did you have to call me now, father?"

"Because I have a use for you."

Father. That's just like you. The similarities between you and Ovan are almost scary.

You called me, because you have a need for me. I don't exist as a person in your eyes. I'm just a thing. My value is determined entirely by how useful I am in the current situation.

And, just like him, you expect me to just accept that and come running anyway!

But in the end, it was only me that could pilot it.

The other pilot. She was in no condition for it.

And my habit kicked in. I see the strong taking advantage of the weak – I see the way the girl tries to crawl out of her bed, wounded – and I forget that here in the real world, I'm not strong.

And so, when the metal beams above come falling down, I react. I protect.

As they fall, I see where they're coming. Big and slow… if you just take the time to look, anyone could avoid them.

If you just have the courage to stare death in the face… it's not impossible at all.

And in me, I shortchange that relationship. I don't need courage. I don't think at all.

I just react.

I just protect.

I'm Shinji Ikari in the real world.

I'm Haseo, Terror of Death in the online 'World'.

But sometimes…

Sometimes the lines get blurred.

When the last of the metal settles, all eyes stare at me as I kneel atop the piled I-beams holding this injured girl in my arms.

Reactions vary in degree. Gasps, accolades, and exclamations of amazement vary in volume.

Misato yells "That was incredible!"

Father says nothing at all.

But as everyone's eyes are on me, my eyes are on the girl.

She's not doing well. She can barely stand being moved, much less move herself.

"Don't." I tell her, referring her struggles to get out of my arms and to her feet.

I don't know what power father has over her. But he shouldn't be taking advantage. It's wrong.

…

I still have Haseo's strength in me, or Shinji's dispassion. I don't know which.

The lines get so blurred some times.

But I have the sense that my protecting act is not over. And I have the sense that yes, I am going to get in the giant purple robot and fight the giant white monster.

Because this wasn't about choosing to take the job or not.

Because I had already taken this job. I took it when, after my first – and only personal – PKK, I just kept going. It was the role to protect. It was the job to hunt down and exterminate with enough prejudice that the strong would know the Terror of Death. They would know not to touch the weak.

"I met a man like you online, father." I say as I gingerly set Rei down on the floor – her gurney is destroyed.

"His name was Ovan. Like you, he wanted to use me. And, he was selfish about it. But there's a difference between you and him." I say as I stare at the man that had come to represent such mixed feelings in me. "You're honest about it."

"Hmph."

"So be honest about this, father. There's no way she can pilot. I'm all you have. You need me."

"…" Father's yellow shades catch the light such that I can't make out anything of his eyes. "…It's true."

"You should have just said so in the first place."

I log in and immediately – as she generally did – Atoli messages me.

Soon, I access the guild server. She pounces on my by the warpgate and drags me to her 'spot'. There's a spot by the grunty pen, with a small little river, that Atoli likes to stay.

Place 3 out of 108 of her favourite places in The World.

"I moved to Tokyo 3 today." I inform.

"Oh no! Did you get caught up in that horrible angel mess?"

I consider telling her. Would she believe me if I told her I piloted EVA 01?

I don't think I'm supposed to tell her.

No, rather, I don't really want to tell her. I see the way she acts around Sakaki. I used to wish so much I was Ovan, so that I could be admired like that. So that I could be important like that.

Now I think it's distant. And sad.

Atoli's always praising Sakaki. But always praising is never laughing.

And Atoli has a nice laugh. When I make her laugh it makes me feel strong. I would hate to lose it.

Not Haseo. Me, Shinji.

"I was in a shelter." I say instead. "But I did get to see it."

"Is it true that it looked like Godzilla?"

"Of course not. It looked like one of those level 30 big white things."

"The ones that cast Repth?"

"Yeah."

"Oooh. My guildmates are always complaining about those! They seem really strong – are you all right?"

"I'm fine. But when I saw the person I'd be living with – that was a real danger. Misato's such a slob." I complain. "I think I need a Rip Duk to purge the poison attack I took from something in her fridge."

Atoli performed the mentioned spell on me, and giggled.

Beautiful.

"What was it?"

"I don't know. It got away from me."

"Eh?"

"It was a fast runner for something so watery. I think it used to be a curry. It had a lot of biting power – in a lot of ways."

"Eh?"

"Just kidding."

"Ouh!" Atoli pushed my arm. "You're making fun of me again!"

"Sorry."

"It feels familiar." I observe, as I'm 'submerged' into the eva system.

"That would be because you have been trained for this." Ritsuko admitts, popping up in a screen. "NERV is the highest shareholder in CC Corp."

"What?"

Ritsuko nodded. "Is that so strange? It was an investment decision. Besides, the VR system was judged to have potential to be quite similar to the eva submergence protocols. In fact, there has always been the potential of the system operating on a thought basis. That was the root of the coma incidents during the second network crisis. Ultimately, we leveraged shareholder interest to modify your character with an event in 'The World'. It's why you have so much more of a direct connection with your character. It's why you can even feel pain when your synch is high enough. You've been in an eva simulator for the last four years, Haseo the Terror of Death."

"That's insane."

"Try walking."

I take a step, I flex my right hand, and I feel so familiar. ",,,How do I fight?"

"Just think it."

"That's not what I mean – what weapons do I have?"

Ritsuko shruggs. "Take your pick."

And it pops up. My weapon-change interface.

Unbeleivable. Is this GUI screen ported straight from The World? Was The World's ported from here?

My eyes scan. Guns. Explosives. A metal spear?

Ah.

I tap the screen.

Ritsuko smirks. Behind her, I can see my father over her shoulder.

He smirks too.

All according to your plans, huh?

I grasp the two knifes that pop out of the shoulder compartments on this thing. I grasp them in a reverse grip.

And I get to work.

I'm Haseo, The Terror of Death. I'm strong.

That's what I tell myself as I run at the monster.

"Haseo. Good to see you." Oh. It's that guy.

"Ah, Sakaki!" Atoli squeaks. "Good afternoon! Um, I was just taking a break from organizing the meeting. I really –"

"That's fine, Atoli." Sakaki assured in that smooth tone of his. "Thank you for your diligent work."

"Oh." Atoli ducks her head. "No problem." She answers shyly.

…I'll admit it. I'm a little pissed off.

"As for you, Haseo, I wanted to speak with you."

"What do you want?" I can't help but ask rudely. I don't like him. I never liked him.

"Is it so strange to want to speak to a fellow guildmate?"

And Matsu shows up, Sakaki's guard dog. Great.

And Matsu demands that I answer Sakaki's every question.

Oh please.

He's not a bad fighter. It's fun to rumble with him to first hit.

But as your muscle? He's level 30. If you're going to 2-on-1, playing dirty, you have to bring a lvl 30?

Even as argument back-up… Matsu? He just parrots anything. He has his own views, sure, it's just that they're nothing like Sakaki's views, actually. And in Sakaki's presence he gets just like Atoli and shunts those personal views out the window.

He means nothing.

"Haseo. It's come to my attention that your PKK activities have persisted!"

Atoli gasps. Really, Atoli?

You're honestly surprised?

"Are these claims true?" Sakaki askes gravely.

I sigh. "Yes."

And then the tirade hits. "Moon Tree does not condone the act of PKing!"

"And that's why I stop them."

"By PKing!"

"What I do is called PKK."

"That's just semantics!"

"Yeah Haseo!" Atoli agrees. "It's wrong to PK!"

Atoli…

"When you joined Moon Tree." Sakaki continued. "I thought you understood. I thought you agreed that PKK was not the answer. That there was a better way."

"I thought so too." I agree quietly. "I did. When Atoli explained it to me – the ways you could use words to force them to back down… without fighting – it made a lot of sense."

"So then you admit –"

"Only… it didn't work."

Sakaki stiffened. "What?"

"It didn't work." I repeat. "Threats without action… it's pointless. PKs are cruel, not stupid."

"We have an overwhelming rate of success with our actions!" Sakaki protests. "These figures show it! You yourself have had success with this method!"

"Do you do… follow ups?"

"What?"

"Do you take down IGNs, and see if they're really being deterred? Do you make sure that, as soon as you leave, they don't just log back in and keep going? The number of messages coming in, asking for assistance, have gone down. But that's not because it's working. It's because they don't believe in us any more."

"That's just nonsense spouted by our detractors!"

"Mine have gone up. They've doubled – no – tripled. Moon Tree has no fangs in the way that it handles things. You do no lasting damage. And in a battle of words, the PKs can just lie."

"The circle of violence will never end, if violence is used in place of peace."

"Maybe it won't. Maybe it'll never end, as long as The World is centred around fighting. Maybe a system of violence is hardwired into the game. It's just like the real world. Bullying never really ends. But even then, as long as the cycle is small enough. No. As long as every victim can look up the boards and know that somewhere, somehow, the PKs aren't going to get away with it… maybe that's enough. At least, I think it's better."

"Moon Tree does not support PKing. If you do not comply, I will have to put forwards the motion that you quit our guild. For the sake of uniformity, unity, and harmony. Change your ways or leave."

"I can't change. I need my ways. I tried it yours." I tell him. "It didn't work."

And then I left.

Atoli… I see her face as I leave.

Don't worry, I still have your address.

It's not like me leaving the guild, or being on the outs with Sakaki, or PKKing… is going to stop you from being my friend… right?

I'm… not totally sure.

But I think I want to know.

They say, when you let a bird free… if it comes back then that's when you know if it's really yours.

I'd like to think Atoli's really my friend.

Maybe it's best I put it to the test.

"Okay Shinji!" Misato declares. "Close in and show us what you've got!"

I do close in, low to the ground. The red orb on its face flashes.

"It missed!" One of the bridge crew declares.

"No." Misato corrects immediately. "He dodged."

I can understand the confusion. I pretty much look like it clipped me and I fell to the floor.

This eva thing is really responsive in some parts, but really sluggish in others.

I scramble back to my feet and continue to run.

"How strong is that thing?" I ask. "Can it one-hit me? And what's it's cooldown?"

Misato gives a 'haaah?' sound. I guess she doesn't game.

"The Unit 01 armor should be able to sustain even a full blast, but I wouldn't place my bets on a second."

I see.

" As for the timing..." Ritsuko blinked a few times. "It's unknown. That's the first time we've seen it."

"Shinji! That last attack did significant damage to the city!"

I get it. We need to take this somewhere else.

I'm halfway through the motions of charge attack before I realize that no, doing a jumping slash isn't going to actually launch it across the field.

So I kind of shoulder tackle it, loading it onto my shoulder and going for the nearest place I can exit the city. It's very awkward. And dangerous.

But, presumably, I can take at least one hit.

Something snaps behind me, and Misato yells something too. But I'm busy.

I just finish body-check when the red thing lights up again.

Oh. Wait.

So, am I going to feel pain or –

I'm right in front of its face now, kiting around just out of its arm length, and Misato tells me "Shinji, you've got to attack! You only have 4 minutes 30 seconds left!"

"No." I tell her. "What's important right now, is understanding its parameters."

Relax, I want to say, I'm a professional. I've killed this thing's lvl 30 cousins maybe a hundred times.

Its swipes are ineffectual even at warding me off. It's sluggish. Unskilled.

And I stay right in it's face.

But it had some special moves, that's for sure.

And the last thing I want is to take that kind of hit again.

"Two seconds minimum, from what we've seen so far." She replied with – I think – nothing but brute memory to back her up. "Ending in 3, 2, 1."

I'm right in front of its face now, and as Ritsuko says 'zero', I slip sideways in a quick motion. The mountainside behind where my head had been lights up like a Christmas tree.

Ten seconds…

Again. On the dot. No tactical variation. No strategic decision other than to begin using, and continue using as much as possible, the new skill.

"What the?" I chuckle drly. "So it's just a mob after all."

I begin to carve it up. It activates some kind of guard feature.

The bridge crew tells them I have that feature too, and that mine can negate the enemy's.

Only mine isn't working for some reason.

I try to explain that it doesn't matter.

And they tell me that oh, my timer is still going down.

I try to explain how that doesn't matter, either.

I'm already at gg - it just doesn't know it yet.

2, 1…

Even the countdown timer is being handy, giving me a way to mark the time accurately.

The blast comes out. I slip out of the way and counter. Hard. I keep it basic in terms of motions. Nothing flashy.

Gale blade. Tri Strike.

They don't do the kind of energy-attack, flashy damage they do in game.

But the prospect of being able to spam them with impunity is kind of refreshing.

The first spray of blood ruins that for me.

Its guard goes back up.

"Is this thing alive?" I ask.

For once, the bridge has nothing to say.

2,1…

I dodge. The shield is down.

"It isn't." My father finally answers.

I glance at his view screen out of the corner of my eye. I don't initially believe him.

But I make an effort to try.

Gale Blade. Tri Strike.

They cut so deep in the real world. It's so messy.

And the thing seems to give up, with me taking it apart faster than it can regenerate, jumping on me and morphing in this strange way.

It's everywhere. It's wrapped around me.

"It's going to self-destruct!" Someone yells.

Oh that's not good.

I go Sword-Dance on instinct, and then into the jumping segment of Whirlwind. I didn't use them before because I wasn't confident in connecting without auto-target.

But now the enemy is everywhere, and it's kind of a moot issue. And as I pepper the glob everywhere around me in mid-air with twisting strikes, it is somehow loosened away.

And I drop, have the eva roll, and cover my neck and head like they teach in class.

This is my place. My guild. My little piece of The World.

It used to belong to a 300 person guild, and back in the day that was enough to have CC corp make a small server guild for you. I bought it out. I have a big 'under minimum capacity' GP fee but now it's just mine. My little place. My little sanctuary, where no one can go that I don't want. Where it's quiet and nice.

The only one I ever invited in, and the only other member, was Atoli. Well, she had an appreciation for game art, and I have a nice small waterfall…

But now there was one more.

A character aptly named Rei Ayanami.

I told her about naming conventions, but she says she doesn't see the point in changing it unless it's an order.

I wonder if I just like troubled, awkward people.

The whole 'birds of a feather' syndrome.

"This is Death Grunty. His attitude's kind of bad."

"You're the one who's attitue's bad, oink!"

"What is the purpose of this character?" Rei asks. "How will this help me to pilot?"

"The Grunty?" I ask. Rei had joined the game, unable in her state to go into the actual eva simulator. "I guess it will help you deal with annoying members of the bridge command crew trying to boss you around?"

"Understood."

"How dare you talk to me like that! Give me 50 push-ups, now! Oink!"

"Haseo!" A new voice says. "I wanted to talk to you about – oh."

Oh.

Hi Atoli.

"You have a…" Atoli trails off. "A guest?"

"She's a new guild member." I explain.

"But I thought this place was only…" She trails off, looking at Rei awkwardly. "I mean…"

Only for us. I know.

But she's really unobtrusive. And I can't just leave her alone.

"She's from work." I explain. "And she's really easygoing."

"Oh." Atoli blinks. "Wait, you work Haseo?"

"I started when I moved to Tokyo 3. I'm in… the public service industry."

That was technically true.

I think.

"Well… that's great! And, um, I'm glad you have another member for your guild!" Atoli congratulates.

It's fake. I can tell.

"She might be quitting the game in a few months." I explain quietly to her, pulling her aside.

"Oh." She beams up at me. "Oh that's too bad."

"When will we begin live combat training?" Rei asks.

I spin to face her. "Soon. First we have to get you some basic inventory items."

"Loadout gear?"

I consider this. "No…Rations… and maintenance equipment, I guess?" I've been reading the NERV pilot manual.

"Understood."

"And then we'll swing by Canard to see if they'll come along with us and show you the ropes."

"Understood."

"Oh!" Atoli exclaimed. "Is Rei-san a newbie? Do you want to join a wonderful guild called Moon Tree, Rei-san?"

Atoli, c'mon. Really?

A/N: ...what? Hey, it had to be done.

Only belatedly do I realize how damn well it would have all gone down with Shinji as Kite.

Shit. Maybe that'll be next chapter.

But then, I don't have the origional .hack games on hand.

Oh. This idea is up for adoption if anyone wants it, go for it. You don't even have to cite me and you can use any and all of this chapter if you want. Just do it. Oh, only, it's on the condition that you tell me so that I can read it because that would be fantastic.

I want to cross with the origional .hack game, and then with Seikirei - with Asuka as Tsukkimi (sp?). And I want to trhow lemon in there. And then... I don't know. Pokemon? Trigun?

Oh, Oh, OH I KNOW! Sailor Moon! Tuxedo Kamen/Mask is stupid, let's replace him with shinji. And then give him a harem.

Oh, and power rangers. Yessssss. Shinji, the purple ranger. Monsters laugh until he rips out their arms and beats them to death with them. Megazord Unit 01, Launch! Megazord... AT... Prog-Sword... Slash!

And then...Fighting Foodons maybe. Because Shinji can cook. And Misato can be the evil boss, makeing Beer-Curry abominations to destroy the world's cumulative appetite in a war that will rock the cullinary universe to it's knees.

And Card Captors, because... because hell yes card captors. And The World Ends With You, because there are three girls in Shinji's life, and three games in TWEWY's storyline, and it would give me an excuse to replay one of the best games in the history of the world.