Author's note: This is an attempt at harnessing what was going through Alli's mind during Don't Let Me Get Me Pt. 2, ergo the melodrama and length. This is my first story, so be kind, and review please(:
Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi or This Bitter Earth/On The Nature of Daylight by Dinah Washington and Max Richter.
And if my life is like the dust
"Sexting? What is sexting?"
I can't believe I've let myself sink so low. Left with a cheating boyfriend, no Clare, who's wrapped up in Eli and her perfect life, and what can I expect from Jenna, the one dumb enough to get pregnant and not even know it? I have no one to turn to, nothing to hide my shame. I will never live this down.
That hides the glow of a rose
"What is it? Tell me."
The worst part is that I know exactly what I've done to get here. I've done stupid things. Boys make me do stupid things. I've made so many mistakes, and had too many secrets and regrets for a smart girl! It's all because of Drew and that bitch Bianca. No, before that, Johnny! How could I let myself lose my virginity at fourteen? Sending sexy photos, STD scares? My parents are right, this isn't me!
What good am I?
"I'm sorry Alli has caused you so much trouble."
Or maybe it is me. Maybe it's all I am, will ever be. Alli, the screw-up. My parents think they've failed me, but it's only my fault; I've failed myself. I let some stupid boys decide my future, make me nothing more than Backwoods Bhandari. I know what I need to do. I need to fix this. I can't go on like this.
Heaven only knows.
On this bitter earth.