By: Neko-chan
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing or Fushigi Yugi. (*pout pout*) I never have, and I never will. Sooooo........DON'T SUE!! Oh, and the Frying Pan of Doom is owned by Patricia C. Wrede. I just borrow it occasionally to bonk annoying Bishonen and my friends on the head. Ja!
It was just another ordinary day..........or was it? It started out normal enough. Wufei awoke with a yell of "INJUSTICE!!" as he surveyed the destruction Duo had left in his room during his search of money to buy food. It didn't matter if Wufei locked his door.......Duo just picked the locks.
And so it was with a much aggrieved grumble Wufei grabbed his katana and chased Duo throughout the house, screaming "Injustice!!" and "Weakling!!" while trying to cut off the American's braid. Same old thing. It was, after all, a daily routine.
However, when Wufei was just about to finally cut off Duo's braid, the five Gundam pilots disappeared in a blinding flash of light.
And reappeared with yet another flash of light in a totally different universe. All boys landed softly on their bums, looking around curiously.
Well.......actually, not all of the guys landed softly. Wufei landed on his head.......with a little more force than was necessary.
"Itai......." he grumbled, sitting up and rubbing his injured organ. He blinked when he surveyed their surroundings. "Eh......where are we?"
Heero was just about to open his mouth to reply that he had no clue whatsoever where the five boys were when he was interrupted by a snicker. The Gundam pilots looked to their right, where the sound was coming from.
In a flash of black light, a girl appeared, sitting cross-legged on a nearby rock. She grinned at the group and stoop up. She was wearing baggy khaki Dickies pants, hung low on her hips. Her tank top was black and the straps were thin; her shoes were also black and the word 'Vans' was written near the sole of the shoe. Her hair was thigh length and a fiery red-orange; she looked at the boys and they saw that her eyes were a clear storm cloud gray. But her clothes and looks weren't the most interesting things about her. Oh no, not by a long shot. She had black cat ears and tail.
"You're in the Fushigi Yugi universe," she said, replying to Wufei's earlier question. She grinned at them and cocked her head.
"How do you know that?" Trowa asked curiously, staring at her with one gem-bright green eye. He looked at her thoughtfully, as if trying to mentally figure out the cat girl in front of him. The girl grinned. He probably thinks of me as a problem to be solved, she thought with amusement.
If it was possible, the girl's smile grew more evil. She breathed on her fingernails, rubbed them against her black tank top, and examined them absently. "I'm an author," she said nonchalantly.
The five boys gasped and quickly backed away from the girl. Authors were dangerous--they were often unpredictable. And with the stories that they wrote, it was extremely stupid to anger or annoy them.
"Wh-Which author are you?" Quatre asked nervously, gulping in fear. He seemed on the verge of fainting and he continued to edge away from the author, hoping she wouldn't notice his fear.
The girl looked at them, her gray eyes glittering with unholy amusement. Then..... "I'm Neko-chan."
Quatre paled while Wufei whimpered in fear. Wufei had experience with this particular author........oh, yes; he did. Super glue and women's make up........ Wufei shuddered at the memories coming to him.
"Y-You made me evil in one of your stories!! You made me seem like a cold-blooded murderer and.......and.......and EVIL!!" the blonde Arabian wailed, wringing his hands nervously.
Heero glared, remembering a certain incident dealing with rain, a leaky tent, and a gun. Trowa just stared at the cat girl wide-eyed, shivering every so often. Drifting through space....cold, so cold.........
Neko-chan grinned at the pilots, her hands clasped behind her head. She enjoyed watching the boys go through her extremely long list of stories, taking perverse pleasure in the fact that their expressions were soon becoming horrified.
So it came as a complete surprise when Duo suddenly glomped her. She stared down at him, blinking rapidly, a stupefied expression on her face.
"WAI!!!!" he yelled, still glomping tightly. "I've always wanted to meet you!! You're soooooo good at torturing Wu-Wu!!!" Suddenly, Duo knelt down and bowed. "Will you teach me all you know, sensei?" he asked, peeking at her from under chestnut bangs.
Neko-chan blinked, then grinned. "Sure!" she answered. "I have no problem with teaching you all of the secrets of Wu-Wu torturing!!"
Hearing this, Wufei whimpered some more and curled into a fetal position. No.......no......
no.........make the bad, bad author go away.........mommy........
Neko-chan saw this and snickered once more. Then she again returned her attention to the group. "Anyways, as I was saying, you're in the Fushigi Yugi universe."
Heero blinked, snapped out of his many fantasizes of how he was going to kill this author. "Any particular reason why?"
Neko-chan frowned at him. "Why what?"
"Why we're here, in this universe instead of our own," Trowa replied, still shivering occasionally.
Neko-chan's frown deepened. She shrugged: "I dunno."
The boys facefaulted. Quatre sat up, rubbing his head. "What do you mean, 'I dunno'?! Do you mean to tell us that you have NO CLUE WHATSOEVER why you're writing this story?!"
Neko-chan laughed nervously, then popped her Siamese kitten out from hammer space. Rubbing Gem's shoulder, Neko-chan grinned sheepishly and said, "Basically......."
Then she frowned and continued: "Well..........just be glad that I didn't put you in the Pokemon universe!!" She nodded smugly, satisfied with her reply.
Wufei, coming out of his 'terrified-of-the-evil-author' state, sat up and frowned at her. "We see no reason with that. We've been there before. This......this I think is something new."
Neko-chan grinned and clapped her hands together. "Well, just think! I just might have made a new crossover pair!" Looking thoughtful, she said, "But I dunno........I haven't found any Fushigi Yugi/Gundam Wing crossovers....yet." She sighed and shrugged. "No matter. Anyways, we're getting off the subject. We're supposed to be talking about why you're here."
"BUT EVEN YOU DON'T KNOW WHY WE'RE HERE, AND YOU'RE THE AUTHOR!!!!" Duo screamed.
Neko-chan blinked, then shrugged. "Well, I have an idea now."
Duo hung his head sadly. Whispering to Heero, he said, "Are all authors this weird......and this talkative??"
Neko-chan, who had heard this, glared at the two smirking pilots. Suddenly, she popped her Frying Pan of Doom out of hammerspace and bonked them on the head. Clearing her throat she continued, "And since I'm lazy, I'm going to transport us to Conan my way." She winked and the group disappeared in a flash of light.
Once again, the four boys landed softly. And once again, Wufei landed hard on his head. Neko-chan snickered evilly and plopped into the arms of a certain red-headed Suzaku Warrior.
"What the hell?!" Tasuki exclaimed, staring down at the cat girl in his arms.
Neko-chan grinned up at him. "Hello," she said. Suddenly, she jumped out of his arms and glomped him.
Tasuki blinked and stood there, not knowing what to do about the girl glomping him firmly.
"Oi........why don't I ever get glomped?" Duo whined, pouting cutely. Neko-chan looked up and grinned at Duo; she snapped her fingers. Neko-chan's best friend, Mirai Chibi Amy-chan (AKA Duet), popped out from nowhere, glomped Duo, then disappeared once again.
Once she was done glomping her favorite Suzaku Warrior (besides Chichiri, Nuriko, and Hotohori, of course!!), Neko-chan jumped down and wandered over to the Gundam pilots. "Guys.....I'd like to introduce you to the Seven Suzaku Warriors. Tasuki, Nuriko, Hotohori, Chichiri, Chiriko, Tamahome, and Mitsusake." Then she returned her attention back to the Suzaku Warriors (and Miaka.......but who really cares about her when they're surrounded by hot Bishonen??). "And these are the Gundam pilots. Heero, Trowa, Duo, Quatre, and Wufei. They're from the Gundam universe."
The Suzaku Warriors nodded knowingly. They had experience with crossovers. "How did you get here, no da? Magic, plot holes, machines, what?" Chichiri asked, looking thoughtful.
"Actually.........she brought us here," Duo said, jerking his thumb at the red-headed cat girl. "She's an author," he continued.
The Suzaku Warriors gasped and edged away from Neko-chan. Miaka gave a little scream (okie, okie.....it was a loud and never-ending scream. Happy?) And ran out of the room. For some reason, not a lot of authors seemed to like her......
"W-Which author are you?" Hotohori asked, staring at the girl wide-eyed in fear. He was softly trembling, terrified of the smaller girl standing in front of himself.
The cat girl scowled darkly. "I'm Neko-chan," she said, crossing her arms over chest.
The Warriors' eyes widened. "N-Neko-chan??" Tamahome asked. Neko-chan nodded a positive answer. "Aren't you working on a Fushigi Yugi story?"
Neko-chan smiled evilly. "Yup! And, of course, DBZ, Card Capter Sakura, Gundam Wing, Revolutionary Girl Utena, Digimon, Pokemon, Labyrinth, Harry Potter, Master of Mosquiton, Magic Users Club, Slayers, Batman Beyond, and I'm thinking about finishing several original stories," she said, ticking each story off one by one on her fingers. Then she blinked and snapped her fingers. "Oh, yeah!! And the Bisho-Battles story I'm co-writing with Mirai Chibi Amy-chan and my Bishonen! story. For some reason, people actually like it." She shook her head sadly and looked up at the Bishonen.
They were staring at her in shock and amazement. "Th-That many??!!" Chiriko asked. Even for him, that was a lot. "How can you write all of those different stories at the same time?!"
Neko-chan shrugged. "I have NO clue. But, anyway, we're getting off the subject....again," she said, giving the Gundam pilots a dirty look. The shivered in fear.
"Well......what's the plot for this story?" Hotohori asked warily. He was still scared of the slender girl and was trying to make himself smaller, hiding behind Chiriko.
Neko-chan winked and tapped her lips. "It's a secret," she said in a perfect imitation of Xellos. The Bishonen facefaulted, staring at her in shock. Continuing she said, "But I can tell you that we're going on a journey. We're looking for something to make your battles against your enemies easier."
At this, Heero's eyes lit up with an unholy glee. "Mission accepted," he said with satisfaction.
"Good!" Neko-chan exclaimed, once again clapping her hands together. "And that's that. Now that we've decided on the adventure, let's get started." She winked again; Neko-chan, the Gundam piltos, and the Suzaku Seven disappeared in a blinding flash of light.