Title: two minds and all the places they have been (1/1)

Character/Pairing: Stefan, Damon/Rose

Spoilers: 2.12

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Author's Notes: Well after this mess of an episode and as my endless Damon/Rose shipper depression continues… here's some fic. Takes place after the events of The Descent, title from the song Bloodstream by Stateless. Enjoy!

Damon is hammered.

It doesn't surprise Stefan in the least, nor do the blood stains on his face or the tear tracks running through them. So he drags him home—not literally, of course, seeing as he's only half conscious anyways—and ends up carrying him up the stairs, laying him down on the bed as gently as possible. He's turning towards the door when he hears his brother's moan of agony (emotional, he figures. Hopes. He doesn't want to deal with injuries, not tonight).

"Stefan," Damon then slurs, grabbing his arm in a vice-like grip Stefan didn't think he was capable of. "Stefan, Stefan..."

"Go to sleep, Damon," his brother says, pretending not to notice the fingers that suddenly double their grip on his arm.

"Stefan," Damon repeats, like a broken record. "Stop, no... just hear me out, okay?"

Stefan meets his brother's eyes for the first time that night and is startled by the grief in them.

"I'm sorry. About Lexi."

(of all the things he expected to hear, this is not one of them)

Damon continues after a short pause (during which Stefan looks confused and Damon adjusts his grip). "I know... I know what it feels like now. To lose someone you care about. It feels like shit, Stefan, and I'm just sorry. I'm sorry for putting you through that."

Stefan is more than startled at the confession, but responds with a quiet, "I know you are. It's okay."

"No, it's not," Damon insists, letting go of his arm at last and turning into the pillow. "I could've loved her, Stefan. Damnit, I could've loved her."

Stefan sits on the bed gingerly, avoiding Damon's legs spread across it. Silently, he agrees.

"I just want her back, Stef," his brother says wearily, squeezing his eyes shut as if that could block out all the grief. They don't open again and his breathing starts to slow as he falls asleep at last. Stefan gets up quietly, but as he's making his way to the door, Damon's voice reaches him again: "Wake me up only if you find out how to bring her back, okay?"

Even in the darkness, Stefan sees him turn away but doesn't miss the fresh tear glittering on his cheek. "Okay," he says, so quietly it's barely even a breath. Damon doesn't stir, and Stefan isn't sure if he even heard him at all. Well, all the better. There was no use in making promises he couldn't keep.

Despite Damon's anguished, drunken words the night before, Stefan wakes him up at nine twenty-one on the dot the next morning and pretends not to notice the glimmer of hope in his brother's eyes.

(it is quickly extinguished)