"O sweet, dear Oberon who holds my heart
How lovely it is now that we are wed
My fairies danced through that most happy-"
Titania stopped mid sentence as her husband, Oberon, interrupted her, looking over at her from his deck chair on the Atlantis Cruise ship 'A trip laced with the magic of the sea' (according to the jingle).
"We don't have to speak in Iambic Pentameter, we are on our honeymoon. This isn't even in the play, it's our vacation. But it's too bad I had to leave Puck behind as a punishment for making you fall in love with a man with an ass's head."
"But didn't you order him – "Titania began, but was again interrupted.
"Oh, look, our Pina Coladas have arrived along with the complimentary lobster." Oberon evaded Titania's accusations as he got up and took his drink and lobster bib,
"Would you like the tail? It's the best part."
"Oh no, I'm allergic to seafood. You should know that! We've been married on and off for centuries now. I'll bet you don't even know what my middle name is." Titania accepted her drink, sipped it, and became even more upset. "And I don't like Pina Colodas!"
The server looked at both of them, considered asking Titania if she wanted something else, then practically fled after seeing the look on her face.
"I know what your middle name is; you asked me that question after we got our last divorce. It's Elizabeth. Ha." Oberon said smugly.
"I have two middle names! I'm Elizabeth Rita. My parents couldn't decide. You have never listened to me! I told you a million times that I promised my changeling boy's mother that I would keep him after she died. But no. You had to have another little henchman!"
"Well, you never tell me things, like your second middle name. You should talk to me more. And that little boy thing was confusing; I mean you had to say 'no' in 10 syllables that went dun-DUN-dun-DUN-dun-DUN! You could have at least written 'no' down and showed it to me or something." Oberon floundered for a grip in this argument.
"Oh, well now this is my fault, isn't it? You know what; I should have known this wasn't going to work out when you booked a trip to Atlantis. Last time I went there the mosquito netting was too holey and I got over 300 bug bites. That's a world record, you know. I am leaving!" Titania stood up, glowering, and snapped her fingers, zapping herself back to the woods.
Oberon sat on the deck chair, stunned for a moment, then shrugged and lay back down. He had paid good money for this honeymoon, even if he didn't have his 'honey'.
Back in the woods
"So… whatever happened to that flower Oberon had? He'll probably be pretty tired when he gets back and I'm sure I can find someone to put a lobster head on."