If he had to guess who he had to thank for his two impromptu guests, he'd set his sights on his pushy husband who insisted on forcing his sentiments on everyone around him.
"Ah, I just can't stand it! Shizuko-chan's just too cute Kuru-nee! Oh, there's just no way something this adorable came out of Iza-nii! No way, no way at all!"
Izaya shot Mairu a look from his seat on the couch which she countered with a cheeky grin before going back to gushing over his daughter.
"Seriously, how could you keep this little angel away from her aunties for so long?!"
"Iza-nii…jerk…"
"You're right Kuru-nee! He is a jerk, a big fat stinking jerk!"
"If I'm such a jerk, then perhaps you'd like to leave and never come back." Izaya drawled as he rested one hand on his knee while the other held his phone which he used to scroll through feeds in an attempt to clear his irritation. But Mairu was involved so he should have known it was moot; and of course, he had known but he made the attempt for Shizuko.
"Sure, we're willing to leave! But we'll be taking this little cutie with us! We gotta save her from you, Iza-nii~" She followed her not-so-subtle dig by snatching Shizuko from her seat on the floor and into her lap as Shizuko giggled in delight.
Shizuo walked in just in time to prevent any acid from being spit.
"Sorry, no can do." The blonde strolled in carrying the refreshments which had taken him from the tense living room and placed them one by one on the table in front of the twins. Izaya's mouth quirked up because-seriously Shizu-chan looks more like a waiter than a bartender. Shizuo scooped Shizuko from Mairu whose protests were drowned out by Shizuko's squeals of Daddy!" as the blonde carried her smoothly over to the couch beside Izaya, mocking airplane sounds the whole way.
Izaya couldn't feel nothing-though he had tried; old habits die hard-when Shizuo sent him a smile as he continued, "She stays with us." Izaya looked away before he smiled back.
"Mm-hmm~" Shizuko added happily, seating herself between them, grabbing one of both of their hands and holding them between her own small and warm ones. "I stay with Mommy and Daddy!" She effortlessly caught Izaya's eyes with her matching ones and smiled brightly. "Right?"
Izaya hummed in agreement and felt his breathing stutter-he was probably coming down with something-when Shizuo's hand closed around his own between their daughter's.
"Ew, are you smiling Iza-nii?"
"…gross."
Obviously, he hadn't done a good enough job preventing physical manifestations of his (gag) feelings.
"Shizuo-san, what have you done to Iza-nii?!"
"Mairu…Shizuo-nii…"
"Ah! That's right! Shizuo-nii what have you done to Iza-nii?!"
Now that was gross. "Don't call him that."
An ability unique to Mairu or to all the Orihara siblings; looking both devious and innocently inquiring. "Why not? He married our brother so that makes him our brother."
"Yuuhei too."
"Yep. So, we'll get to see Yuuhei every time there's a family gathering!" Mairu practically vibrated with excited energy, her expression manically giddy.
Shizuo frowned. "Don't bother Kasuka while he's working though."
"No promises~"
Shizuko was a natural mediator. Before Shizuo could growl out another warning she asked, "When are you going to take me to see Uncle Kasuka, Daddy?"
"Ah, when he gets back from overseas. He's filming right now."
"Yuuhei doesn't know about Shizuko?!"
Izaya clicked his tongue. "You're being too loud. Can't you make an effort to be less annoying?"
"Can't you?" Mairu countered without missing a beat. Izaya smiled threateningly because how else could he make his agitation clear without alarming the little angel at his side?
Mairu dismissively broke eye contact with Izaya and turned over-excited hazel eyes back to Shizuko. "Anyway Shizuko-chan, is there anything you really want for your birthday? It's in January, right?"
"Something I really want." Shizuko hummed slightly in contemplation and the presence of two annoyances was the only thing that prevented Izaya from hugging the tiny form close to him-Can't they leave already, ne? "Oh, I know!" Shizuko squeezed both of their hands in excitement. "I want Mommy and Daddy to be happy!"
Honestly, how had he raised something so pure? Shizuko was a lovely contradiction in every possible and impossible way.
"No way! You can't waste your birthday wish on Iza-nii of all people!" He would ignore the fact that he was singled out.
Shizuko tilted her head to the side. "But why not?"
Mairu blinked owlishly-maybe, hopefully she's broken-before slouching and taking a sip of her drink, sighing heavily when she had finished-guess not.
"I guess we have to accept that Shizuko-chan is Iza-nii's kid after all, Kuru-nee." Kururui nodded, staring at Shizuko in silent contemplation.
"Ne, what finally got you to accept the obvious?" Izaya asked, voice devoid of interest.
"I wouldn't call it obvious~ But when Shizuko-chan made that face just now she looked like you as a kid."
That didn't make much sense.
"Do I really look a lot like Mommy?!" Shizuko leaned forward excitedly, eyes glued to Mairu who grinned back at her.
"How would you know?" Izaya snapped, a slimy kind of discomfort swirling in his gut, burning his tongue.
Mairu wrinkled her nose. "There were some pictures of you in the house, ya know. One's from when you were cute."
Izaya furrowed his eyebrows in an attempt at recollection. It was probably some picture taken and mounted for the sole purpose of segueing into more important matters-
"Is that your son?"
"Yes, that's Izaya."
"Oh, how precious! I have one about his age."
"Is that so? Perhaps we could arrange a play date when we're done with business here."
-they both made him sick.
"Iza-nii's frowning now!~" Mairu chirped.
Izaya ignored Mairu as Kururui crawled over to sit directly in front of Shizuko. Monotonously, she poked his daughter's cheek and mumbled, "Smile…Shizuo-nii…"
"That's true." Mairu hummed as she huddled next to Kururui. "She has Shizuo-nii's smile, alright."
"You think so?" Shizuko and Shizuo responded in perfect unison. Izaya watched in amusement as Shizuo tried to reel in his excitement while Shizuko's age prevented her from having to do the same. Silly Shizu-chan. Silly and endearing.
"She…like both of you." Mairu remained quiet, sensing Kururui's statement needed no translation and Kururui smiled softly at Shizuko who giggled happily.
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"Alright, I've had enough of your annoying faces for one day. Hit the bricks, ne."
Kururui clicked her tongue in revenge for earlier.
"You know Iza-nii, that bad attitude of yours is gonna make Shizuo-nii stop liking you."
Izaya felt his brow twitch and smiled tensely back at his sister in order to stay quiet. Even now, even from someone who had nothing to do with what happened between he and his monster, any suggestion toward Shizuo's impending apathy made it seem a concrete possibility.
Kururui plucked Mairu on her forehead causing the latter to yelp dramatically. "Say sorry." She frowned and gave the younger twin an uncharacteristically hard look.
After a moment Mairu reached a finger under her glasses to wipe away a tear. With a shocking show of remorse, she closed the distance between she and Izaya and looked up at her brother in earnest.
"I'm really, really, really, really, REALLY sorry, Iza-nii." She hugged him without hesitation but Izaya didn't accept the embrace in the same way. He gave up pushing against her shoulder when Kururui added herself to the hug, effectively trapping him in a rare show of sibling affection-because when had he ever won against the two of them together?
"Shizuo-nii OBVIOUSLY, TOTALLY loves you, ya know!" Izaya flushed from irritation, nothing else.
Before he could make a futile demand for Mairu to quiet down, Kururui mumbled, "So do we."
"Yep! We do, we do!" Twin-and were those genuine?!-smiles faced him.
"Alright, enough, I get it." He rolled his eyes and made to move away from them, only to have arms tighten around him.
"Iza-nii…not like them." Izaya froze, knowing exactly what Kururui meant and feeling torn between relief and anger at having an almost subconscious fear negated by his younger sister.
"Yup, yup! Shizuko-chan's lucky she has you." Mairu's chestnut braids bounced as she nodded.
Izaya was saved from having to allow some form of unpalatable gratitude with an undertone of reciprocation to leave his mouth when Mairu added, "Ah! But it'd be better if you were less of a stubborn jerk, though!"
Mairu laughed and this time neither twin fought when Izaya pushed them out the front door.
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We're back to these two, ne. It's always entertaining to poke at insecurities which Izaya is barely conscious of. I think he's been learning things all wrong but for so long he's been trying to do them right, not realizing the discrepancies in his own way of thinking. Like anyone he's a work in progress who maybe hadn't been given the best framework at the start. Well, that's how I see him.
Big thanks to Novoux for convincing me to write about these two. I hope a comeback is in the works!
Thanks for reading.