(A/N) Well, here it is. My first ever DeanCas Big Bang fic. Fun was had in the writing and stephmendes did some AMAZING artwork for the story. This story picks up at the beginning of season 9 during 'I'm No Angel' and quickly goes canon divergent. I marked the story as having rape just to be on the safe side, but it seems to me more like the gray area of dubcon, seeing as how it's a siren story, and we all know how that shit works. However it strikes you, I surely hope you enjoy.
Link to Steph's art: stephmendes .tumblr post/152260989330/ illustrations-inspired-on-a-song-in-silence-by
A Song in Silence
Chapter 1: Song of the Siren
Bartholomew shuddered as he watched Maurice leave the church, only barely having managed to keep his disgust concealed during their meeting. He truly detested having to work with these rogues, but, with order basically upside down and Castiel still on the loose and off the grid, there was very little choice remaining.
"You might have more choice than you think," a familiar voice announced, and when the angel looked up to see its owner entering the church, he understood why.
"Castiel?" he whispered in mild shock. There was no way it was that easy.
"Hey, there, Bart," the person he thought to be Castiel greeted him with a leer that had no right to be anywhere near a face as solemn as the renegade angel's normally was.
"What are you?" Bartholomew asked, suddenly realizing this creature was neither human nor angel.
"That doesn't matter, chief. I hear you've got a pretty hefty bounty out for one, Castiel. What matters is that I can get him for you in half the time any of these reapers could do it."
"How?" the angel demanded, glaring at the Castiel-that-was-not through narrowed eyes.
"Like this," he answered, grinning as his body shifted form. Within moments, instead of Castiel it was Dean Winchester standing before him.
"Siren," the angel said quietly once the realization hit.
"You got it," the creature said, its voice a perfect imitation of the elder Winchester's cocksure tone. "I know where he's heading, and for the right price, I can bring him to you. More than that, I can make him crawl straight to you. What do you say?"
Bartholomew shuddered with equal parts disgust and interest. Disgust at the idea of having to work with a creature such as this…and interest in seeing Castiel brought so low, certainly a fitting punishment for everything he'd done.
"All right, siren. I'm prepared to talk price with you. All you need to do is get to Castiel before the reapers do."
"No problem there," the creature said, its dark chuckle made all the more threatening for coming from Dean Winchester's mouth. "Little Cas is gonna be the easiest hunt I've had in a while."
XxX
Castiel, former angel of the lord, leaned heavily against a brick wall after he'd ducked into an alley. The injury from his last angel battle was paining him more than it had before and now, even though he was warded from his brothers' sight, he had no way of obtaining anything to eat and no shelter from what looked like a storm coming in. Not for the first time during his ordeal, he found himself asking how Sam and Dean did it.
Being human looked so easy when you weren't the one caught up in it, didn't have to see to the constant needs of a frail human body. Now that he had no means of filling it, he could feel his stomach begin to growl in earnest. Hunger wouldn't kill him just yet, but when combined with the pain of the blade wound, it was fast becoming an unbearable situation. He was really starting to wonder if he was ever going to make it to the bunker alive.
Dean…I can't do this alone. I'm not strong enough. I wish you were here…wish you were with me. I wish…
Then, almost as if his prayer had conjured him, Cas found himself gazing into concerned green eyes.
"Cas!" Dean cried out in relief.
"Dean?" he whispered in shock, reaching out a hand to touch the hunter's face without thinking. "How…how did you find me?"
"Been trackin' you, man. You haven't exactly been quiet since you left Colorado. I've been all over this damn town lookin' for you," he said, and Cas couldn't deny the flutter in his all too human heart when Dean smiled at him. Once again suffering from a deplorable lack of forethought, the former angel suddenly found himself throwing his arms around Dean, burying his face in his chest and clinging to him like he was the last solid thing in the world.
"It's so good to see you, Dean," he said, voice muffled against the hunter's chest.
"Hey, hey now. It's okay," Dean said, and instead of pushing him away as Cas had half-expected, he wrapped his own arms around him. "It's over now. I'm here. You're fine."
For several moments, Cas just rested in the circle of the other man's arms, leaning against him and breathing in his familiar scent. He had longed for Dean to hold him for so many years now and too much had happened these last few days to question…why now?
"Hey, Cas? You still with me?" he faintly heard Dean asking him.
"Yes. I'm sorry," he mumbled. He hadn't realized just how exhausted he was until that moment. In fact, he wasn't certain how much longer he'd be able to stay on his feet. "Did you say something?"
"Jesus, Cas. You're dead on your feet. Let's get you to a bed," Dean said, chuckling easily as he pulled Cas out of the alley. As he led him through the streets, Dean seemed to make a point of keeping a hold of his hand.
"What…how's Sam doing?" he asked, following Dean without question. Through his haze of sudden exhaustion, all he could really focus on was the intense tingling sensation he felt where his fingers were intertwined with Dean's. He'd experienced physical sensation at Dean's touch before, but only now was he realizing just how pale those sensations were in comparison with actual human feeling. This sensation…it was already threatening to overwhelm him in his weakened state.
"Oh, he's fine. Zeke took care of things. Sammy's back at the bunker with Kevin. Don't you worry about anything else right now. What you need is a good night's sleep, maybe get some decent food in you."
"I am…relieved," Cas said slowly as he stumbled along behind Dean. "At least one thing has gone right."
"Yeah. Small favors," Dean said absently.
With his intense focus on the way their hands were joined together, Cas couldn't help but notice when Dean ran a thumb along his palm, sending a small current of electricity through his body. Cas gasped sharply at the sensation.
"Somethin' wrong?" Dean asked him.
"No, just…how much farther is the Impala? I think I really may collapse. I'm…much more tired than I thought," he mumbled, rubbing at his eyes with his free hand to try and help himself stay awake.
"Just one more block. Keep it together, dude. I'm gonna get you home," he said, gripping his hand a little tighter.
"Home," Cas said softly. After everything that had happened, that sounded so wonderful. By the time he heard the sound of a car door opening, he was just about asleep on his feet.
"Come on, sleeping beauty. Let's at least get you sittin' down before you pass out," Dean coached as he helped him into the car, even buckling his seatbelt for him. Cas tried to say something in response, but it came out as a tired groan. He was too exhausted to notice or care that the car was not the Impala at all. By the time the car was moving out into traffic, he was completely dead to the world. Leering, the creature who wore Dean's face leaned over to run a hand along the former angel's inner thigh, stopping just short of the good part.
"Rest up good, angel baby. You and me are gonna have some fun tonight."
XxX
"You can kill me. It won't matter. If I don't find Castiel, there are others that will. It isn't just reapers after him anymore," Maurice spat in Dean's face.
"What are you talkin' about?" the hunter demanded, pressing the angel blade even more harshly against the reaper's throat. He was only an inch from killing the smug bastard.
"I hear things. Sounds like Bartholomew's even got…less savory creatures on the hunt for Heaven's most wanted."
"Like what?" Sam pressed.
"Don't know if it's true…but I hear the angels have set a siren loose on your boy. Even if Castiel can evade the reapers, there's no way he'll get away from a siren on the hunt. Just watch. Castiel will be led to Bartholomew on a leash."
"SHUT UP!" Dean screamed before violently driving the blade through the reaper's throat, instantly killing him. He barely took the time to pull the blade out before starting to pace the room.
"Dean," Sam started slowly, not completely sure how his brother was taking this news.
"What?" Dean snapped at him.
"It might not be true. You heard him."
"That's not what pisses me off. Why would I care about that? It just makes me mad these sons of bitches are goin' after Cas at all."
"Dean…this will be much less painful for everyone if you acknowledge that you do care."
"Sam," Dean started warningly. "I swear, if you go there-"
"Dean, I'm serious. How many times do the three of us have to die before we start being honest with each other?"
"So, what? One more trip down the rabbit hole and you're suddenly the love doctor?"
"You said it, not me," Sam pointed out.
"Y'know what? Fuck that shit, Sammy. We are not gonna play psychoanalyze the Winchester tonight. I'm gonna go find Cas. If you wanna keep pokin', you can stay here," Dean said before striding angrily away.
Sam hesitated only a moment before following. He would go on not pressing, as he'd done for the past five years, but he was really starting to wonder if his brother would be getting more psychoanalysis than he wanted before this was over.
XxX
When Cas finally began to stir, it was to find himself being laid down on a bed. Blinking his eyes open, he saw Dean moving away from him.
"Dean?"
Spinning around, Dean's face quickly lit up at seeing him awake. "Hey, Sleeping Beauty. Good nap?"
"Where…where are we?" he asked as he slowly sat up.
"Motel outside of Cedar Rapids. Didn't want you to have to sleep in the car if you were gonna keep on sleepin'."
"How long was I asleep?"
"About ten hours."
"That long?"
"Yeah. Musta been really wiped out there. I didn't know when you'd be wakin' up, so I went ahead and grabbed a little late night dinner," Dean said as he moved to the small table next to the door and picked up a bag. Cas' stomach growled painfully when he caught the scent of hamburger and french fries. Dean blinked several times upon hearing the noise. "Well…I was gonna ask if you were hungry, but that pretty much speaks for itself."
Cas felt a very heated blush spread across his face as he glanced away from Dean. "Yes. I'm sorry, I-"
"Hey, nothin' to apologize for. You're new at this. Go ahead. Pig out," Dean said, grabbing a burger from the bag before setting the rest of the food down down in front of Cas. The former angel eagerly dove into the paper bag, coming up with a burger. He barely remembered to take the wrapper off before taking a large bite of pickles, onion, cheese and beef. It didn't take him long to devour it. As he reached into the bag for a second burger, he glanced sheepishly over at Dean, who was sitting on the other side of the bed with his own burger, grinning as he munched on it slowly.
"Thank you."
"No problem. Hold still a sec, though. You got a little somethin'," he started, leaning forward to wipe a thumb across Cas' chin. Once again, Cas felt that same electric current where Dean's skin touched his. He shuddered briefly, fighting the urge to lean into the small touch.
"You okay?" Dean asked as he pulled his thumb away with a smear of ketchup on it. Cas couldn't deny the sudden stir he felt in his loins when Dean licked the small bit of red from his thumb.
"I'm fine," Cas answered, swallowing heavily as he turned his attention back to his food, which now seemed decidedly less interesting. It was a struggle not to look over at him when he slid his jacket off.
"You sure? You're lookin' pretty flushed over there," he said, reaching across to rest a hand on his forehead. "Don't think maybe you caught a cold sleepin' on the streets?"
"Dean, I'm fine, really," he said, suddenly feeling desperate. It took every ounce of control he possessed to pull away from the touch. Whether he was desperate to be closer to Dean or farther from him, he couldn't be sure. Hiding what he wanted was so much more difficult now that he was subject to the whims of his weak human body. It had been satisfied with food. Now it was hungry for something more.
"Don't suppose that cut on your shoulder could have anything to do with it, do you?" Dean pressed, staring pointedly at him as he shifted to his knees on the bed, gathering up the remains of their dinner.
"How did you-"
"I saw the blood when I was carryin' you in," Dean told him as he disposed of the trash, going for the duffel on the table and fishing out a first aid kit. All the while, Cas tried to shake off the image of Dean carrying him. "Now you're awake, we can get that patched up a little better. Wanna take the coat and shirt off?"
Cas' breath hitched slightly at this. He both did and did not want to remove his clothing in Dean's presence…but he also knew his wound wasn't healing properly. This was necessary. So, taking a deep breath, Castiel slowly removed his jacket.
Dean cracked a wry grin as he watched him. "Need some help?" he asked as he set the kit down on the bed. Without waiting for an answer, he reached for the first button on Cas' shirt, easily undoing it.
"Dean…" Cas whispered, suddenly uncertain. Looking up at him, he reached his hands up to rest them on Dean's, not sure if he meant to stop him or encourage him.
"Yeah?" Dean asked, locking eyes with him, and as they continued to gaze into each other's eyes, he slowly undid the rest of the buttons. Cas was too caught up in those beautiful green eyes to remember what he'd been trying to say and when he stayed quiet, Dean took the opportunity to slip the shirt from his shoulders.
"Just hold still," Dean said softly, eyes briefly flicking down to Cas' lips before he pulled himself away, moving around and sitting behind him on the bed.
Castiel was briefly drawn out of his haze of lust when Dean pulled away his makeshift bandage and ran an antiseptic wipe over the injury, thoroughly cleaning it out. The brief spike of pain didn't keep the haze away for long, though. As Dean's fingers moved tenderly over his abused skin, Cas could barely keep himself from trembling. He would have given anything to have Dean go on touching him. He was almost saddened when he felt the new bandage being secured in place, but then something he never would've expected happened.
Right next to the new bandage, he felt the press of Dean's lips against his skin. Unable to help himself, Cas gasped sharply then exhaled a shuddering breath.
"Dean," he cried out softly when the hunter pressed his lips to a different spot. Already he could feel his body reacting to the intimate touch.
"Cas," Dean exhaled quietly against his back. "I was so fuckin' worried about you. I was goin' crazy…every day you didn't show up. Almost lost Sammy…coulda lost you. I can't do it anymore, Cas. I can't fuckin' do it," he hissed as he pressed a somewhat rougher kiss to the juncture of his shoulder and neck. Cas groaned a little louder when Dean wrapped his arms around his middle, holding him tightly against his chest.
"Dean…please," he moaned when he felt the other man's lips pull away from him.
"D'you want this, Cas?" Dean's voice was suddenly at his ear, whispering, tickling…exciting him.
"Yes," he whispered back. "You cannot know how long I've wanted this."
"Good," Dean hissed in his ear, and there was something strange about his voice then, something almost…predatory. Then the hunter was releasing him and he heard a brief shifting of fabric before Dean moved around in front of him, quickly pinning him to the bed. He had only a moment to see that Dean had taken the time to remove his own shirt.
As Dean leaned down to claim a proper kiss on the lips, Cas' hands slid up his arms, and when he was caressing his wonderfully toned shoulders, that was when he felt it…the mark he'd left on Dean's right shoulder when he'd raised him from perdition…the mark he no longer had. He could feel it burned into the skin as if he'd raised him only yesterday. As his breath escaped in a painful hitch, Cas turned his head to the side, not allowing the kiss.
"Dean doesn't have this mark anymore. I healed it myself," he said, feeling something in his heart tear as he began to realize what was happening.
"Mm, I know, but you wish he did. You wish you'd been able to keep your mark on the Righteous Man…claim him as yours for all the world to see," the creature mocked, its voice now an ugly caricature of Dean Winchester's beloved tone.
"What are you?" Cas demanded, trying to struggle free, but quickly realizing his limited human strength was no match for his captor's.
"Well, let's think," the monster began before pressing a harsh kiss to the underside of Cas' jaw. "What creature can read your mind and manifest itself as the deepest desire of your heart? One guess."
"Siren," Cas growled, shuddering in disgust at the revelation of just what was pinning him to the bed.
"Bingo, we have a winner," the creature said with a cruel laugh, leering down at him with Dean's face.
"What do you want with me?" Cas asked, looking away from the siren in shame and revulsion. How had he been so easily duped by this monster?
"What don't I want with you, Castiel? Just as a start, you're extremely fuckable, and there's just so much anguish and unspoken need tangled up behind that stoic mask of yours. I'm gonna enjoy milkin' that for all it's worth," the siren said in a strangely silken tone, eagerly grinding its hips against Cas', and even though he knew just what sort of creature had him in its clutches, knew just what kind of power it had, he couldn't stop the tiny gasp that left his lips at the contact.
"You won't – have that power," the former angel ground out, still struggling to get free. "You don't control me…not until your venom is in me, and I won't allow that," he said, keeping his face turned away from the siren, fighting not to tremble as it laid several heated kisses along his neck.
"You sure? Cuz that hard on between your legs says otherwise," the siren said, giving another harsh grind to emphasize its point. Cas threw his head back against the mattress, involuntarily crying out at the intense sensation. "If you think you can resist, you're wrong. You said it yourself, and I can see it in your mind. You've wanted this too long, needed it for too many years. Too long you've been yearning for Dean Winchester to hold you, to kiss you, to spread you over the backseat of that Impala and fuck you until you don't know up from down. No. You've got no hope of holding back now," the siren murmured in his ear, stretching out its tongue to lap lightly at the shell.
"You're not…Dean," Cas groaned desperately, fighting to keep his head turned away as the siren moved his hands over his head, keeping his wrists pinned with one hand as it moved its now free hand down to his belt, fingers moving scintillatingly across metal and leather.
"No. I'm what you need most, Castiel – and what you need most right now is for Dean Winchester to love you," the creature purred as it snapped open his belt, causing Cas to wince at the sound. "You need him to adore you…to make love to you…in spite of everything you've done."
As the siren spoke, it slowly undid his pants, reaching inside to squeeze eagerly at the place Cas most wanted Dean to touch. Cas moaned helplessly, breathing growing ragged as his hips gave a tiny buck against his will. His body already knew he'd lost, but his heart hadn't acknowledged it yet.
"Will you kill them?" Cas asked, forcing himself to remember what was at stake here if he lost to this creature.
"Hmm?" the siren hummed against his neck as it continued to stroke him.
"The Winchesters…and the prophet…will you use me to kill them?"
"Oh, them. Heheh, no. As much fun as that would be, those idiots are miles from here. It's just you and me tonight, and when I'm done with you, I'm baggin' you for the angel crowd. They all want your head on a plate, Cas, and they're offerin' a pretty flattering price for it. So if you're gonna die anyway, what's wrong with goin' out like this, huh? One steamy, passionate night with your precious hunter, then all your pain goes away forever," the siren offered, gently rubbing its nose at the corner of Cas' mouth.
Cas shook his head vaguely, no longer as adamant about keeping his lips turned away from the siren. "This…it…it isn't real," he hissed, several teardrops escaping from his eyes. Never in all his years of existence had he felt so utterly torn in two. His body wanted what the siren offered, but his heart was breaking with the knowledge of what it would mean.
"Real's a matter of perspective, Cas. Real or not real, this is what you need right now. Besides, you know you'll never be with the real Dean Winchester. Deep down…you know this is what you deserve. You deserve to be punished…and to die like a dog."
"Why are you doing this?" Cas asked, turning his face up to look the siren in the eye, their lips barely inches apart. He wasn't fighting anymore. "You can take what you want any time."
"No," the siren said softly, breath ghosting across Castiel's lips. "I'm not going to force you, Castiel. You're going to choose it, and that's the point. I didn't have to give myself away. I could've had you twice by now, completely willing, without a drop of venom. I wanna see the great Castiel choose to fall into damnation, with full understanding of what it means when you do. So kiss me, little angel, and you and me'll hold hands and sail off this cliff together," the siren said, its voice a perfect imitation of Dean's most seductive growl.
The creature's grip on his wrists had loosened, but Castiel did nothing with that knowledge. For what could have been an eternity, he just stared up into those piercing green eyes – eyes that he'd loved longer than he'd even understood what love was – and they gazed back at him with all the love and desire he'd ever dared to hope Dean could feel for him. He remembered the first time he'd ever gazed into those eyes in Hell. Dean – on the verge of becoming a demon – gaze dark and dangerous, but even after everything, still hopeful, still needing him.
Save me, Cas.
With that, the former angel slipped completely over the edge. He didn't care anymore. There was no reason left to fight. It was over. The only thing left was the fall – his very last, into Dean's arms, into eternal damnation, and he didn't care. All he wanted was this one last thing – to be with Dean before the end.
Castiel surged up off the bed, wrapping his arms around the hunter's neck and seizing his lips in a hot, demanding kiss. Dean growled possessively against him, mouth opening eagerly to deepen the kiss. Cas groaned needily as he tasted the Righteous Man for the first time. There was the taste of the burger he'd just eaten, but there was also something smoky, spicy, and so uniquely Dean, it was intoxicating. Cas was left gasping when the hunter pinned him back to the bed, hands raking deliciously down his sides.
"Dean…ah…Dean," he moaned helplessly as the hunter lowered his head to his chest, flicking his tongue out to lick teasingly at each nipple.
"You like that, angel baby?" he asked as he slowly sat back up. Cas nodded drunkenly as he attempted to follow him, but Dean pushed him back with a hand on his chest, using the small moment of separation to pull the rest of Cas' clothing off. That done, Cas eagerly pulled him back down onto his body, fingers scrabbling desperately at every inch of skin he could get at as they exchanged kiss after ravenous kiss.
"Tell me what you want, sweetheart," Dean growled as he ran a teasing hand up and down Cas' thigh.
"Hngh…want you…want you to take me, Dean," he pleaded, hands reaching desperately for the other man's belt buckle. "Make me yours."
"Whatever you want, babe. Gonna make you feel so good," Dean hissed in his ear as he gripped the former angel's hips tightly in both hands, leaving a very distinct set of bruises. Despite the pain of the grip, Cas bucked eagerly up against him.
"Yes…yes," Cas panted as he tore the hunter's jeans open, thrusting them down past his hips and bringing his erection into view. Dean growled playfully at him before taking a moment to kick the last of his clothes off. When he fell back on Cas, there was no longer anything between them. Just the sweet, heated press of skin against skin.
For several minutes, Cas just lay there, feeling, reveling in everything Dean was doing to his body. How many years had he longed for this? From the moment he'd laid hands on the Righteous Man in Hell, really, no more than a brief flicker of time in his own existence…and yet, somehow, everything that had come before it seemed so insignificant when stood beside his time with Dean Winchester.
And now that he had what he wanted, he was never going to let it go. Growling right along with Dean, he began to kiss back with a renewed sense of urgency.
"Dean…want you…need you so much," he groaned in between kisses.
"I know you do. Can't live without me, can you," he teased, slipping a hand between his legs for another squeeze. Cas cried out in bliss at the current of heat that moved through his body.
"No," he breathed out as the hunter continued to fondle him. "I'd die without you."
"Damn right, you would. Do you love me, Cas?" he demanded quietly, fingers caressing the curve of the former angel's backside as they circled the place where Castiel really needed him.
"Love you…love you…Dean. I love you," he murmured over and over again as he writhed beneath him.
"Want me to fuck you?" Dean hissed in his ear.
"Yes…please…fuck me!" he begged, truly desperate now. His heart told him he would die if Dean didn't take him soon.
"As you wish," Dean said before flipping Cas onto his stomach. He was vaguely aware of the scent of rose oil before two slicked fingers were suddenly thrust into him. Cas threw his head back as he screamed, both in pain and pleasure.
"Aw, yeah. That's it. So tight," Dean groaned in bliss as he leaned down over him, working him further open with every move. "And no one's ever touched this but me," he said with no small amount of pride.
"No one…nobody…nobody but you…Dean…oh," he panted as he bucked back against the fingers that penetrated him.
"Mm…just you and me. This ass is mine!" he snarled just before thrusting his slicked cock into the former angel's body. Cas cried out at the sensation, burying his face in the pillow and screaming.
"Oh…oh, ga-…fu-…Dean!" he cried out, unable to get out any other words.
"Fuck, yes!" Dean shouted as he rode him hard. "My angel. My fuckin' angel."
Cas tried to say something, but all his mouth could produce just then were elated gasps and prolonged moans and cries of Dean's name. All he could do was writhe helplessly as he neared completion.
"Come on, angel cakes, come for me," the hunter snarled in his ear as he reached a hand beneath him to wrap it around his full cock. "Wanna hear you scream my name when you come all over this filthy bed."
Castiel didn't disappoint. All it took was one more thrust and he was coming into Dean's hand, screaming his name as the orgasm seized his body, and when Dean finished in him with a satisfied grunt only a few thrusts later, they both collapsed on the bed, hopelessly entangled in each other.
"You belong to me now, Castiel," Dean said as he cradled Cas against his chest, voice strangely soothing. "You're all mine."
Cas nodded weakly as he snuggled deeper into the hunter's embrace. "All yours…love you," he whispered as he drew Dean's hand up to his lips to press an adoring kiss to his palm.
"Love you, too, angel baby, and we're gonna be together forever…so long as you do what I say."
"Anything, Dean…my Dean…my love," the former angel said, smiling like a fool when Dean gripped his hand just that little bit tighter.
XxX