Disclaimer: I have no clue why this happened. This random idea popped into my head at almost 11:30 at night, and it stuck with me. It's so silly, but I felt like there might be a couple of laughs out of it.

"Speaking"

Thinking

Drama club was, in simple words, a weird and loud mess filled with crazy costumes.

You get those kids who feel like they're those people from High School Musical; that they're better than you and have the voice of an angle. Ironically, that's sometimes true. There's the techies who dealt with lighting and sound, the costume-makers, and the people who loved to be in the spotlight. There's also the general area for people who just liked to put on plays.

Then there's me. Me, who only did it for the music. I didn't sing. Far from it, as I had the worst voice ever. When it came to saying lines, I sounded like a broken record. However, I loved instruments. I was brilliant with a piano, and that's how my friend managed to convince the club leader into signing me up.

Under the heat of the spotlights of the stage in the gym, under the intense eyes of several curious group members wanting to watch me rehearse my cues, I began to read from my papers loudly. "With this hand, I will drown your sorrows-n-no, that's not right." Shuffling the papers, I glanced back at my partner. "What was it again?"

"It's lift your sorrows," she giggled, holding a hand to her mouth. "Though, I suppose drowning could be suitable too." Drama was a peculiar talent of mine, but it's not like I disliked it with a passion. However, this time was a little... different. Our club was putting on Corpse Bride; the stop-motion film by Tim Burton. Though, with a few slight changes. Such as... me.

I was Victor van Dort.

Sure, I supposed having a female lead wasn't that big of a swap, but I was actually playing him as a male character. My voice didn't match it, but my piano skills were enough to win over 'el presidente'. After all, one of the highlights of the play was Emily and his duet where they make up, and how he and Victoria first met in her manor. All of them involved a piano. Just had to wear a short black wig and a suit, and I was ready to go. That, and she had the balls to say that since I had nothing in the front, I could easily pass off as a guy already.

Now, if only I can nail my lines. It's the wedding practice in real life, honestly. Life just sucked, majorly. "O-okay, Claire. I think I got it this time." I cleared my throat and started from the top. Did Victor really have this much trouble remembering lines too? Because I could clearly relate to his nervousness. "With this... hand, I will lift your sorrows. Your cup will never be empty, for I will be your wine. With this candle," I held up the white candlestick, showing it to her. "I will light your mother on fi-dang it!" Wrong moment! Wrong moment of the movie!

Claire's giggles turned into outright laughter, and a few of the practicing drama geeks chuckled. "Well, ha ha, that wasn't entirely wrong!" I slapped a hand to my forehead, groaning. "Lighten up, Jazzy. It's not like you're that far off from the full thing."

"Excuse me for wanting to actually do well at my role," I rolled my eyes. I lifted the papers up, and smacked them on the top of her strawberry blonde head, earning a small shout. "And it's Jazz, you goof. Besides, you have it easy. You're one of the undead chefs. You're not gonna have everyone breathing down your neck to be perfect."

"And I'm perfectly fine with that. Now then. Don't you have some sort of thing you said you had to get done today?" She rubbed her head, pouting.

"Yes, and this 'thing' is called studying. Some of us are also dedicated to the rest of their schooling, and not looking fine in a costume and makeup. You ought to try it sometime." I ignored the small mumble of letdown from Claire and hopped off the stage. I saw some of the other students mutter disappointingly at my sudden choice to leave, but I shrugged them off. I was here to practice, not to make a fool of myself. Snatching my brown messenger bag off the seat, I slung it onto my shoulder and spun around to face her. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Walking through the almost empty halls as my fellow classmates left their respective clubs and late classes, I glanced at my reflection in the glass of the trophy cabinet. My platinum blonde hair stood out against my pale skin and blue eyes. A pair of black leggings was snugly worn under a dark purple sweater dress with a black belt around my waist. Perfect for autumn weather. I didn't look the part of the character at all, save for my skin color. Then again, most of the cast were being painted blue and purple to mimic their deceased look. A sea of orange, red, and yellow greeted me as I stepped out into the chilly air, and I began to head down to the sidewalk. Having to live near such a close location to her school helped with club activities. It was easy to traverse from one place to another without fear of parking. Plus, there's always that one smart aleck who liked parking in my designated spot for three months until I finally gave up.

Ugh. Come on, Jazz, I muttered internally, kicking a small growing pile of leaves at my feet. The canopy overhead blocked out the sunlight, letting bits of the warmth stream down through gaps. Lines are easy. If you can remember chemistry formulas, you can remember this. She even saw the movie! Why was it so hard to nail i-character. "That's it!" I slammed to a halt, almost letting a distracted student run into me before he grumbling passed around me, casting a dirty look over his shoulder.

Character. I wasn't getting into the mood. Perhaps I just had to feel it more, somehow. Sort of like... method acting. I didn't want to take this seriously, but wouldn't it be grand to show up those snobs the next day at rehearsal and give them the practice of a lifetime. Now... to find a good place to set the mood. Looking around me for a split second, I darted off the pavement and into the woods beside the road. "Just get into the mood, and this shouldn't be a problem." I don't head off into the woods that often. In fact, not many students ever did. They usually stuck to the sidewalks to smoke and chat. Practicing out there off the road and away from prying eyes was perfect. I mean, I could do it at home, but it's a little weird to repeat my lines when my family can hear me. I liked my privacy, and I was gonna get it. The towering trees stretched to the sky, and the ground rose and dipped. A fall breeze blew through the area, and I shivered involuntarily.

"Alright, you got this." Dropping the bag by a fallen tree, I pulled out my script again. "Let's try this one more time." Hmm... how accurate do I wanna make this? Normally, method actors went all out, right? I knelt back down to the damp ground, and shuffled through my bag again before finding a plastic wrapped candy leftover from lunch. "I... imagine this would do the trick." Ring Pop, cherry flavor. Perfect. And... sweet! I ripped off the wrapper, tossing it into my book bag and sliding it onto my hand for safe keeping. "I'll eat you later."

Standing up and scanning the lines several times, I let them drop into a pile at my feet. "With this hand, I will lift your sorrows. I will cup your-whoa, Jazz. That's way too off." Can't even believe that was hinted at in the movie. I had this. I did. Just... I had to focus. No one was around, just the birds up in the trees. So then, what was there to worry over? "Deep breathes, and... with this hand... I will lift your sorrows."

I gulped anxiously as I continued, but the rapid beating of my overworked heart was slowly and surely steadying. "Your cup will never empty, for I will be your wine." The words were slightly hesitated, yet spoken clearly. Examining the sweet on my hand, I walked away from my gear, further into the woods as I felt myself dive deeper into the role. Better. Now don't lose this momentum. Let it carry you. "With this candle," I broke off a small branch, and knelt down to pretend to light another twig a few feet off the ground on a small hill. "I will light your way in darkness." There was still the part where Victor went overboard and began pretending to chat with Victoria's parents, but that wasn't as big of a deal at the moment.

And now... the final touch. "With this ring... I ask you to be mine." I slid the Ring Pop off my hand, and let it slide onto a branch beside it. Its gnarled smaller branches curled to mimic a hand, making me feel even more like the character. Brilliant. Absolutely perfect. "Brr, is it ever cool." A gust of wind swept through me, and I hugged myself as I looked up towards the sky. Definitely should have brought at least a wind breaker with me to school. Odd though. All of the birds just... stopped chirping. Why do I feel like... I did something wrong?

"Hmm-? AaAHHH!?" I screamed as something snatched out around my wrist, and yanked me against the hill under me. My face smashed into the wet dirt, while whatever was holding me fought to keep me there. My arm was now deep into the earth, right up to my shoulder as the thing kept tugging roughly, wanting to bring my even closer and possibly straight through the ground itself. Wha-what's going on!? What's holding me!? Finally, with a strong pull and planting my feet awkwardly underneath me, I brought myself upwards, and whatever was holding me came with. Stumbling back several feet away from the hole, I looked at my arm... and promptly started screaming again. "Arm! Dead arm!" No skin at all-freakin' dead person! "Get it off!" Grabbing where the elbow should have been on t-the bony human arm, I ripped it off and let it fly far behind me, not caring where it went.

A soft rumbling came from where the arm came from, and I stepped backwards. Th-this isn't real, Jazz. You're just imagining things! Wake up, wake up, wake UP! The ground from the hole began to crack open, letting dirt and rock fall in as another arm clawed at the ground, using it to hoist the thing up. Dirt tumbled from the top of its head as it rose up from the hole-no. Not a hole. A g-grave. I-I put a candy ring on a corpse. Branches snapped at its clothing as it rose up, illuminated from the setting sun behind it. Holes were ripped at their clothing, showing thick rib bones underneath the filthy white shirt it was wearing. The corpse's basketball shorts, revealing its skeletal legs, held frayed edges with loose strings dangling down. Its arms were much of the same state, all bone, but I could only see part of it from the holes in the dark blue hoodie it wore.

The hood was kept up over its face, head lowered until it finally reached the surface, certain that it wasn't going to fall back into the hole it just crawled out of. "... i do." Wh-wait, what!? What do you mean, I do!? I do, what!? A hand, n-no muscle at all, no skin, raised itself to its face and pulled back the edge of the hood, just enough for me to see its face. Large black sockets, and a mouth that was no way human. It still had its teeth, but it seemed... fused. Melted together to form a permanent smile. "hmm?" It held its hand up its face after lowering it, examining the candy jewelry before its sockets moved to my petrified eyes. Small, white glowing dots floated in the empty gaps where eyeballs should have been, shining brightly in the darkness. "whoops. hehe, didn't really think those words through at first when i woke up. gotta say, didn't really expect the question to be popped to me. but, i've never really been all that picky. hope i didn't rattle your bones too much." It winked. W-winked. I-it just-skeletons don't even have eyelids!

My eyes boggled at the undead creature, barely registering its deep, baritone words. Mo-monster! Undea-zombie mo-! Mon... mo... oh. My head rolled to the side as I collapsed in a heap, legs buckling under my dead weight. My head was buzzing from how fast my heart was beating now, and it was clear that I was close to fully fainting.

Worn, faded slippers, oddly pink in color moved towards me, the leaves crunching under its weight. The monster loomed over me, its bone where the eyebrows should have been moving to make a concerned look. This... this wasn't human at all. Wh... what is this thing? "geez, kid. way to make a first impression on your groom. oh well." It walked away for a moment before returning just as quickly. I could hear an odd snapping sound as the skeleton reattached its severed arm to its socket, twisting and bending the bones to see if it was secure. My eyes finally fell shut as something warm slid under the bend of my legs and around my shoulders, lifting me off the ground. N... no. L-let me... go. "c'mon, now. oh man, paps is goin' flip when he hears 'bout this." ... help...

This was just a random sleepy idea that I came up with. Not to be taken seriously one bit. Figured it'd be worth posting to see what would happen. Frankly, I would be willing to make another chapter for kicks and giggles, but as of right now, this is it. This thing's too funny for me, for some weird reason.

Until next time!

Angel