He pulled up and parked his car down the street from the church where the ceremony would be taking place. St. Mary's Church had been built in the 1930's in the Gothic style of the middle ages. The gray granite gave it a cold look, a forlorn look that matched the feelings that ate at him. He'd come a long way to be here and he'd arrived with a heavy heart. He stepped out of the car and felt the cool, crisp autumn air of Minnesota. It was just another way to describe his feelings on this day. As he made his way inside he noticed the colors of fall that she'd chosen for her wedding colors. They matched her in coloration and feel, the colors of the ribbons in the flowers matched her hair and he could feel the crispness of her being.
After climbing the stairs and entering the building he stood in the vestibule of the church and listened to the processional that played mournfully. He knew he probably should not have come and probably he would not be welcome, but he came anyway. He had things to say and hopefully she'd listen.
As he walked down the side aisle to the midpoint of the church not one person turned to him. He gazed as the participants moved over onto the altar with the priest. The maid of honor, Kensi Deeks and the best man, who he didn't know stood with them as the priest started the ceremony. He gazed at the bride's side of the church and knew many of the people there. His surfing buddy, Deeks, was there, as was his boss Hetty Lange and the rest of the team. Callen had come with his wife, Sara, and Sam and Michelle sat with them. He alone stood apart from his family.
He entered the pew and sat five or six rows in back of his family and waited. He really didn't know what he was waiting for but he'd be sure to know it when it happened.
The ceremony continued with the priest talking about how marriage was not to be entered lightly and how it was a completion of two people into one. He'd always felt that with her but he'd been too shy to really know what he felt at the time. Being part of a dysfunctional family is essentially being alone and that is what his real family was. He didn't really don't know how to deal with others especially where his own feelings were concerned. He closed himself off from those feelings that would have brought the two of them together.
Over the course of the last year as he watched her plan this wedding he began to see her in a different light. He'd always looked at her like a great co-worker and someone whose intelligence equaled or surpassed his. If he'd been forced to admit it she intimidated him or she had. He'd grown more at ease with her until the last month. The realization that she was leaving and marrying someone else slammed him, hard. He took a leave of absence from his job so that he didn't have to see her, hoping that the confusing emotions he felt would go away, but they didn't. They intensified to the point where he purchased a ticket to come here and be a part of it, if only to make her happy. She'd been upset when he responded with a negative to her invitation.
As she turned to face her groom he noticed how beautiful she looked and felt jealous that she looked that good for another man. He listened to the service and realized that if he had played his cards the right was it would have been him. He'd been such a fool.
The priest mentioned that what God had put together no man should put asunder. He almost got up and left but the next thing the priest said made him take note. "Is there anyone here who knows any reason why these two should not be married, let him speak now or forever hold his peace." He took it as a sign from God that it was now or never.
He stood slowly and in the most serious voice anyone had ever heard from him he spoke to the bride. "I do."
Every face in the crowd turned to face him but he didn't care. He'd come to speak to her and hers was the only face he saw. "I know that at one time we both felt there was something between us but it scared me, so I backed away. In the last few months I've come to realize that I have never felt anything like this before and I have to say, it hurt to see you moving on. I saw you preparing for this day and I still couldn't accept that you'd really leave us and by us, I mean me. I took the leave of absence because I didn't want to see you go and be with someone else. It was tearing me up. I would understand if you had me thrown out of here on my ear, after all I am messing up the most important day of your life but I need time to talk with you before you do this."
She came down away from the altar leaving the groom with a puzzled look on his face.
Kensi looked back to him and smiled at what he was doing. She'd known all along that the groom was the wrong man for her. The bride needed and had really wanted the nerd that teamed with her every day. Deeks had tried to talk sense into the man in the far pew, but his fears and feelings of being alone got in the way. Kensi saw her husband get up and walk back to him to stand by his friend and surfing buddy.
Deeks met him and patted him on the shoulder and nudged him to meet her. He smiled and walked to the middle of the church. He met the bride in the center aisle and took her hands. "Nell, please don't do this. I love you more than you'll ever know. I just need time to prove it to you."
Nell took one hand away and placed it on his cheek. "Eric, we've got all the time in the world."
With those words they walked back out of the church and he drove them to her parent's home for the conversation that had taken too long to happen.