"Finished." the brunette grinned. He'd finally be able to show Feliciano the song! Speaking of Feliciano...
As if on cue, Lovino felt a pair of arms wrap around his neck. "Ve~" Feliciano giggled. "What are you doing, Fratello?" He asked curiously, staring at the piece of paper in his brother's hands.
"Oh, this. You know the song I was working on?" Lovino asked. Feliciano nodded.
"Yeah. You've been spending so much time on it lately." the red-head mumbled, his facial features saddening. "You barely ever play with me anymore."
Lovino chuckled lightly. "Sorry... But I'll be able to play with you a lot more now. I finished the song!" Feliciano brightened instantly.
"That's great!" The Italian beamed.
"But there are two problems." Lovino said. Feliciano frowned.
"One, I haven't finished the lyrics..." The younger brother sighed quietly. Lovino had always been a perfectionist when it came to music.
Lovino turned around to smile at Feliciano. "But if I can solve the second problem, the first one won't matter." Feliciano raised an eyebrow curiously.
"I don't have anyone to sing with."
"Me! Me! Pick me!" Feliciano cried almost instantly. Lovino laughed.
"Alright, alright. But only if you're up for it. Then, we can figure out the last verse later; together." Feliciano nodded vigorously.
"Yes!" He giggled, and Lovino couldn't help but smile. The elder set the papers against the piano and Feliciano watched in amazement as his fingers danced across the ivory keys. Lovino opened his mouth to sing the first verse.
"In the night, every sound was put on mute, everything was quiet."
"The white snow floats gently down
Hands rose toward my face
The snow that was flowing melts in an instant as more falls...
What a sad way it all ends..."
Feliciano sat down next to his older brother, the gentle voice soothing his nerves. Even if the lyrics were depressing. It was most of what Lovino was writing lately. Then again, he had good reason. Feliciano steadied himself as the words flowed from his mouth.
"Soundlessly the snow falls to the ground
You play with them and sweetly smile in the white.
'I wonder what my voice sounds like now...?'
"It won't matter..." Feliciano paused to cough into his hand before continuing.
"If I say something, it's not... like you could..." Lovino stopped playing the piano as his brother started to cough harder. Feliciano stared at his hands and wasn't surprised to find blood staining the pale flesh - but it scared him.
Feliciano continued coughing, unable to stop. Lovino quickly got up and started to guide his brother to the bed. Feliciano leaned against his brother for support, as images blurred and danced before his eyes in slow motion.
The younger looked up, expecting to hear words of reassurance from his brother. Lovino's mouth was moving, but no sound came out. Feliciano let out a whimper of fear and clung to his brother tightly.
He couldn't hear him at all, and he was starting to go numb again. Feliciano vaguely felt himself being set on the bed as his brother wrapped his arms around him.
"Ssh, it's OK," Lovino whispered, despite not being heard. Still, he wrapped his arms around his little brother and told him it would be alright. He knew it wouldn't be, though. It was only a matter of time. "I'm here, Feliciano... I'm not leaving you."
Lovino started to sing again, not caring whether he was heard or not.
"Tell me if you're in any pain; tell me if you're feeling lonely
No matter what, I'll always find you someplace
Don't leave me like this, please; I beg you, don't go
I thought that we shared only one soul together?"
Lovino tightened his hold on Feliciano as he started to shake. Still, he continued to sing for his brother.
"The snow covers every bit of anything and you slowly disappear
There's nothing I could possibly do besides embrace you
I ask you one thing, if you could; let me hear your voice, one more time
Maybe just this once, maybe just this one time
Please speak to me..."
Feliciano hugged Lovino tightly, whimpering. Lovino held Feliciano close as if it was the last time he could do so, which was very possible. Suddenly, Feliciano ceased movement in his brother's arms. Lovino feared the worse as he checked his brother's pulse.
He let out a sigh of relief at feeling the heartbeat. "Thank God..." He murmured. He tucked his brother under the blanket, making sure he would be warm. Well, he might as well make some food for when his brother woke up. Lovino solemnly walked to the kitchen to prepare some pasta - it had always been his brother's favorite dish.
As the water boiled, Lovino walked towards the piano to jot down a few more lyrics.
Glazed over eyes that don't work anymore, it's not like they can see a thing now
The dark world is motionless
Everything's gone
Everything doesn't move or make a sound, unless it is the snow
He grimaced slightly. But it was all he could think of. After all, he knew it was only a small amount of time before Feliciano would...
"Shut up." He muttered to himself as he went back to the pasta. He shouldn't have those kinds of thought. Especially when Feliciano needed him! Lovino was going to make sure Feliciano would have the best time of his life before... Lovino chased those thoughts away once more as he tried to focus on the food.
But unnoticed by Lovino, Feliciano was watching at the door. The younger let out a small sigh before escaping back to his room.
So he really was going to die soon... Well, it wasn't as if he didn't expect it. Every day, it was getting harder to walk. The pain became more intense, the blackouts worse, and it was harder to wake up. But he'd live for as long as he could.
For his brother.
It was then that Feliciano took his rosary, and knelt beside his bed to pray.
"Dear God, if I am to die, please..." Feliciano swallowed the lump in his throat and continued. "Please let my brother continue to sing his wonderful songs for me. I hope I'm not being selfish, God."
"Just...I beg of you, please... just let Lovino continue to sing for me, so that people know that I too, was alive once. That I walked among everyone. Give my brother's voice the proof of my life. Thank you God."
Feliciano set the rosary by his bedside and climbed back into bed as he heard the sound of water being dumped into the sink. The pasta just had to drain, and Lovino probably needed to make the tomato sauce.
He took a moment to gaze out the window. The falling snow was so beautiful... White and pure, as if feathers from an angel's wings were falling from the heavens. Perfect. It was then an idea hit him. Taking out pencil and paper, he began to write. Maybe... maybe they would find this letter with the song he wrote, once he departed earth.
To whomever it may concern...
Once the pasta had finished cooking, Lovino dished it onto two plates for Feliciano and himself. He tentatively knocked on his brother's door, carefully balancing the dishes of pasta in his hands.
"Feli? Are you awake?" He asked.
"Come in, ve~" Feliciano said, stashing the paper under his pillow. Well, at least he was finished. Lovino barely concealed his relief as he entered, setting the food down by the nightstand.
"I made some pasta, in case you're hungry." Lovino said. Feliciano smiled brightly.
"Thank you so much, Lovi!" Lovino resisted the urge to roll his eyes at the pet name, and instead chose to pat his brother's head as he devoured the pasta, before starting to eat his own food.
Feliciano slowed his chewing as he gazed at the snow falling down outside. So lovely and white…
"Hey, Lovi?" Feliciano asked quietly.
Lovino paused eating and swallowed his pasta. "Yeah? What is it?"
Feliciano chose his words carefully. "Can we… go outside?" Lovino frowned at his brother. He'd surely get even sicker then he already was if he was to go outside!
Feliciano continued, pleading his case to the older brother. "Please, Lovino! It's so pretty, and I want to go outside before the snow is gone!" Feliciano took his brother's hands, startling the latter. "Please, Lovino…"
Lovino stared at his brother in surprise. He sighed, before nodding. "Fine, we'll go later, probably around 5:00. But you need to finish eating your lunch first." He grumbled. Feliciano grinned, before hugging Lovino.
"Grazie, Fratello!" Lovino allowed a small smile before returning the hug.
"You thirsty?" Lovino asked.
"Yes! Can I have some milk?" He asked politely. The elder brother nodded, and took the cup of milk by the nightstand and handed it to his brother. Feliciano grinned as he held the cup given to him by Lovino.
"Thank yo-" He started to say, before the cup fell from his hands and fell to the ground, shattering. Lovino looked at it in shock, and then stared at his brother.
Feliciano laughed nervously. "Oh, I've been so clumsy lately! As if my body has a mind of its own! I'm sorry, fratello... I'll clean it up." Feliciano moved to get up before Lovino stopped him.
"It's alright, I'll clean it up," Lovino said with a strained smile. "You just go back to sleep." Feliciano blinked in surprise before nodding.
"Alright then! It's a bit early for a siesta, but it'll so. Thanks Lovi~" The younger giggled, retreating under the covers. Lovino went to retrieve the rag so he could clean up the spill.
When he came back, Feliciano was fast asleep. Good... Lovino thought. After disposing of the mess, he sat outside Feliciano's door; crying softly.
"Muscle spasms are the first sign of his body losing control. I'm afraid he doesn't have much time left anyways..." The doctor's words echoed through Lovino's mind as he buried his face in his knees, which he hugged close to his chest.
I don't want to lose you...
I love you so much...
Feliciano smiled as he put his coat on, while Lovino wrapped the scarf around his neck, making sure it would keep Feliciano warm, before dressing in his own winter attire. Unbeknownst to the elder, Feliciano had slipped Lovino's song into his coat pocket. He left his own song by the bedside. So then, he could always keep Lovino with him!
"Let's go!" The younger exclaimed, reaching for his brother's hand. Lovino let him hold it as they walked out the door into the cold winter night.
Feliciano watched his brother's breath; it started as a white puffy cloud before it was blown away and evaporated. He felt scared, knowing his life would be gone, just like that. He shook away those thoughts. Come what may. As long as fratello is with me, I'll never really be alone.
It was then that Lovino noticed where they were going. He smiled as they approached the frozen body of water.
Feliciano let out a happy laugh as he dragged Lovino towards the pond they'd always played by when they were kids. "Come one, fratello~! Let's go play!" He laughed again as he walked onto the ice.
"Be careful, Feli!" Lovino chided lightly, poking his brother's forehead. "It could break."
The younger of the two shook his head. "I'll be fine, fratello! Let's have a bit of fun." Lovino sighed before giving in and let his brother drag him onto the pond; but only going 10 feet away from the solid ground.
Feliciano giggled as he spun his brother around on the ice, both of them flying into snow banks. The two looked at each other for a split second before they burst out laughing.
Lovino climbed out of the snow bank and dusted himself off before helping his brother up. Feliciano grinned as he started to drag Lovino elsewhere.
The brunette followed curiously. It seemed as if they'd walked for hours before arriving at what seemed like the middle of nowhere. Lovino shivered as he straightened his scarf. "Feli, we really should go back." He pointed out as the blizzard raged on.
"J-just a bit longer." Feliciano persisted, masking his pain and tiredness. "I want to have a snowball fight."
Lovino rolled his eyes, but knew his brother was so stubborn he wouldn't stop asking until he got what he wanted. "Fine, but then we're going back."
Feliciano scooped up some snow before throwing it at his brother. "Why you-!" Lovino shouted, before hurling a snowball. The fight continued, before they both became very tuckered out. The siblings laughed together as Feliciano let the snow fall into his hands.
"Hey, Lovino?" Feliciano asked, legs trembling. The pain was starting to set in, as the snow blurred before his eyes.
"Yeah?"
"If I… If I went away, would you still sing?" Feliciano asked, as he felt the numb feeling start to take over his body.
"If you wanted me to…" Lovino frowned. "Feliciano, why are you asking me this?" He demanded.
Feliciano smiled weakly. "I just wanted to make sure… that you'd keep singing for me… even if… even if that time will come very soon…" He drew in a shaky breath. "Where I too… will disappear… just like the melting snow…" He gazed at the white specks fondly as they fell into his open palms.
Lovino's pulse quickened as he felt fear start to creep in. "W-why are you…"
"It's OK, Lovi!" Feliciano beamed. "You don't have to worry about me anymore! Besides… Thank you! I lo-" He started to say, before Feliciano's knees buckled under him and he collapsed.
Crack!
The ice beneath him shattered as Feliciano hit the ground. Lovino's eyes widened in terror.
"Feliciano!" Lovino screamed as he ran forward to his brother. Feliciano's blank amber eyes stared back. Weakly, he lifted his hands to the sky, snow gently falling into his hands.
"Fratello... isn't it beautiful?" He asked, shuddering slightly. "The snow..."
"F-Feliciano! Hang on! I-I'll get you to the hospital right away! Please, just..." Lovino choked back his tears. "Please don't... leave me alone..."
"Silly fratello, you're not going to die... so why are you crying?" Feliciano asked softly, pressing his cold hand to his sibling's cheek. Lovino spoke, but his voice was starting to fade, along with everything else, Feliciano observed. "Please don't cry for me… I can't…"
"Feliciano! You're not gonna die! Hang on!" Lovino cried, gripping his brother's hand tightly in his own.
"Sing for me... one last time..." Feliciano murmured. "I can't hear you... and I know I'm selfish... but please... before..." Feliciano's voice stopped, and he was no longer able to speak.
Lovino held back a sob as he tried to steady his voice and sing. He didn't want to. He wanted his precious brother to be the one able to sing. Lovino wanted to be the one on the ground in the snow, dying.
Lovino said a silent prayer, asking God to give his voice to his brother. He wanted to hear Feliciano sing. But he sang for his brother. Knowing it would be the last time either would do so.
"You're body has now become cold, your voice is long gone
"I can't do anything; I can't even melt away with you
Please hear all of my words, please smile at me again
My tears no longer exist; I can't use them to make you melt away."
Lovino wept quietly as a few of his tears fell from his eyes and splattered onto Feliciano's face. Feliciano watched his brother's mouth move, reading his lips. He tried to picture something joyful. All those times they'd spent together, those moments of pure joy, pure bliss... Happiness.
"I ask you one thing, if you could, take my voice away from me
And give it to the person I hold dear to my heart
If I'm left all alone in this huge world without your presence here
Let me disappear
Alongside your body..."
Lovino sucked in a breath shakily as Feliciano's hand became limp, and his eyes started to glaze over. He knew Feliciano was dead. But he wouldn't acknowledge it. Never. He would continue to sing, even if it killed him.
Lovino did start to notice the blizzard becoming colder, and he knew his body may as well freeze along with Feliciano. So Lovino just sat there in shock. His brother... dead? Gone? As in, forever?
"I love you with my being, and now there's no way to tell you..." Lovino sang softly, the blizzard and tears muting his voice by a fraction. He held Feliciano's hand tighter in his own, as the last words of his song formed on their own.
"This world of ours is slowly crashing down, it's all fading..." Lovino gulped as the cold wind stabbed at his back like hundreds of tiny needles. Lovino ignored it.
"Even if I scream with everything I have, neither you nor your voice will return to me." Lovino murmured, as fresh tears poured from his eyes. He gently stroked Feliciano's cheek. I love you. He thought.
"I love you." Lovino said, aloud this time.
"Fratello, look at this!" Lovino watched as his brother pointed to a small cat running towards the duo. He smiled as Feliciano played with the cat.
"I love you." Lovino repeated.
"Ve~ it's such a beautiful drawing! And you say you're not a good artist!" Feliciano hugged his brother, admiring the drawing.
"I love you."
"Fratello will never leave me, right?" Feliciano asked.
"Of course not, dummy." Lovino rolled his eyes, but smiled nonetheless.
A happy smile from the younger. "Then I'll never leave fratello!" Feliciano laughed playfully as he hugged Lovino. "Ti amo Lovino." He whispered, snuggling up to his older brother.
"Ti amo, Feliciano." The brunette replied, drifting off to sleep.
"I... l-love you..." With every breath Lovino took, his body shuddered. He let out a sob as agony engulfed him, and Lovino just couldn't stop himself as a scream erupted from his throat. He lost it, and just hugged Feliciano's body to his chest, crying and screaming.
"Wake up, dammit! Wake up, Feli! Feliciano, please!" Lovino cried, soaking his brother's scarf with his tears as he buried his head in Feliciano's chest.
"Feliciano! I need you!" Lovino exclaimed, though his pleas fell to deaf ears. "F-Feliciano... we're twins... we share the same soul..."
He brushed a few stray locks of hair out of his brother's face. "I can't live without you..." He whispered, as the tears trickling down his face started to freeze over. Lovino took his brother's hand once more and intertwined his fingers with his twin's.
"Let the snow keep falling... and take me away to my brother..." Lovino asked of no one in particular.
"Please... God..." Lovino said quietly, holding his brother tightly.
"If I am to die... let me be with Feliciano again. Let me be his older brother... Please..." Lovino whispered, as he fell back onto the snow. He never let go of Feliciano's hand, as he felt his life slipping away, winter and death claiming him.
A single tear ran down his cheek once more.
His heart stopped.
His chest did not rise.
But he died happily.
With his brother.
Arthur Kirkland sighed as he watched the children walk through the house quietly. Poor kids, to die out there in the storm like that... It was terrible. And their friends were so devastated, it was heartbreaking to watch.
"Hey, Mr. Kirkland?" One of the boys asked; a young teenager with tan skin and dark brown hair.
"Yes...?"
"Antonio." He replied simply. "How... how did they die? Feliciano and Lovino, I mean." His green eyes looked so dull compared to their usual liveliness.
"Well, Feliciano died of his disease. But..." The blond man frowned. "Lovino died of natural causes. He caught hypothermia. By the time we found them, it was too late." Antonio nodded solemnly, as a few of the other friends gathered around.
"I think I know why." Antonio whispered.
Arthur raised an eyebrow, while the other blond teenager - Ludwig, Arthur thought - nodded in agreement, his blue eyes saddened. "It makes sense."
"What do you mean?" The Brit asked curiously.
Antonio smiled sadly. "Feliciano must've died in the storm; Lovino probably didn't leave him. They..." Antonio's voice shook as he spoke, tears glistening in the corners of his eyes. "The loved each other, so much..." Finally, the Spanish boy broke down and sobbed, tears cascading down his cheeks.
A young French boy pulled Antonio into his embrace, the latter murmuring a quiet "Thanks" muffled by his sobs. The German let the tears fall as well; his older brother hugged him gently, as if he was so fragile he'd break.
Meanwhile, a young Japanese boy - Kiku was his name, or at least what Arthur remembered from his pesky trouble making brothers - emerged from the boy's bedroom, clutching two pieces of paper in his hand.
"Everyone?" He asked softly. They all turned to look at him. He held up the two papers. "I found these by Feli-kun's bedside table... One is a song he left for us, the other is a letter." He looked to Arthur and asked, "May I read it?"
Arthur nodded. "Yes, go ahead."
Kiku nodded, and spoke softly, his voice filling the deadly silent room.
"To whomever it may concern...
Whether you're my friends, my brother, or some random stranger, I just want you to know this.
I will be dead by the time you are reading this.
I'd like to tell you, though, in this letter.
I lived.
I was alive.
My brother and our music are proof. I don't want to be forgotten, and I don't want people to be sad. Get on with your life, continue moving forward. I know my brother will. He can help you. But if he's by any chance dead, I'm happy with him.
And who knows? Maybe we'll all get to meet again someday. The song I have enclosed for you... Please sing it. Spread my message of life. I lived, and I was alive.
I'm sure people will be sad, but it's important to do what we can for the living, not continue to mourn over the dead. We have to deal with the present, and not stay stuck in the past.
I'm realizing this as I write it. All of you, thank you, so much. I love all of you. And please, tell my brother if he's alive... tell him to live for me. Sing for me.
I hope I'm not being selfish when I ask you these things, or hope I will see you soon. But still, I love you. And tell him... I want to be twins again. I want us to be brother again. Together forever.
Thank you all for the most wonderful life a person could ever have.
Love,
Feliciano Vargas
