"so we need to speak of ginerva " the mind healer said her name was mrs.shots
"yes what can we do to help her get better " mom said
"well ginny has a lot of problems mental probloms she is not mental but she has mental disorters " Dr.shots while tacking out her jurnal and opening up to her paige about ginny and her disorters
they all noded
"ginny's first disorter is anxiety after thinking a lot of negitive thoughts our body starts to feel a lot of symptoms .sweating ,nervousness, avoiding eye contact ,tight muscles and feeling like a statue these symptoms then result in bad feelings she will often feels like these feeling are intolerable to handle "she said and fliped a page
they all noded "yes we kind of expexted that but what else" said bill as they all laced their hands together
"ginny has hit borderline disorter were she will test you to see if you will abandon her she will ask a lot of questions that she already knows because she feels falure .she gets tired of life and her head she will apolajize a lot .the change of a subject can become immediatley unplesent and cause a reaction -anger ,sadness,fear,ect."she said they looked at each other and noded
"she will stay a bit quiet it's not like she have nothing to say ,she would rather let the emotion storm inside her and say things to hurt you but immediatley be sorry and have a panick attack "she said they all pailed
"she has what how long how many times "charlie said
"she had 12 a day in the first week and only 6 a day the second week and then 4 a days the 3rd week now she bearly has any " she said they all noded
"so what else "said ron
"she has derelization its when she will loose touch with her suroundings .could feel foggy or sort of dream like as if she was in a dream and could not wake up "she said and they all noded
"she has depersonalisation it is similar to derelization it's called depersonalisation it is when she will feel lost touvh with herself .this could feel like she will watch herself do something or act in a certin way and they don't have control over it at all "she said they all noded
"now second last but definatly not least ginny has hit hard deprestion "she said mom burst into tears and dad held her they all pailed
"now depretion is more than just sadness it can feel empty almost like nothing at all .depretion is unecplainable and it makes her scilent it isolates her she will probrobly go into self harm now she will most defanetly tell you she is fine but remeber she is not "she said
"ya but how can we help her "fred said
"ya are we just suposed to watch her ir help her "said charlie
"dont prove her right she is going to test you yes"she said
"ok so last she will have little moments with prosopagnosia its were she will have momets after a panic attack she will have this for about 1 hour were she does not reconize faces its like taking a phohto but it never saves but she has stoped that that no longer happens "she said
"wait panick attacks when does she have them " ron said
"yes when does she have them " bill said
"well she can have it anytime she can have one during brakfast ,lunch or dinner if she has negitive thoughts she will just have one she could be in the shower or sleeping and. nightmare she wakes up its dark then she will have a panick. "she said
"what just in the middle of nowere she could just have one "said ron
"yes " D.r.shots said
they all pailed they knew that she would not have normal life anymore but they can help
"ys now ginerva she dont tease her she will get angry but she can not sleep alone she has to sleep with the closest brother "she said
"she'll sleep with me im the youngest closest to her "ron said
"not by age she will sleep with me i have read books about this i know what to do if she has any problems "percy said
"she will sleep with us what is better than 1 person 2 people "said george
"no me because i know more about her and im her favriote "said charlie they all argued until bill shut them up
"she will sleep with me i know her best i am closest to her and she has slept in my bed before she has only slept in charlies bed once but i was the one she would go to also im the oldest "bill said
"alright then travel will be best for her she will have to get out of her confert zone "she said and she got up
"i would like letters of how she is doing and yes i would also speak to her in letters myself " she said
"i will be going i will right you letters with problems she has that you have difuculty " she said they all noded and she left
"alright ron go bring ginny down she has her things packed we are leaving tonight remember so go bring her down for lunch yes "said dad who was pail in the face holding mom as she wiped her tears
ron noded and walked up stairs he opened the door only to see ginny wraped in a blancket laying on her side her nees pulled up to her stomach she was in the corner and faceing the wall her face touching the wall ron stood there and backed away and went down stairs
"i cant she is in a ball in the corner "ron said bill got up and they both went up stairs looked inside only to find her in the same position bill came over and placed a hand on the blancket and unraped her she looked up and got to her feet bill nelt down in front of her and placed his hands on her sholder
"firefly are you ok "bill said ginny emmidiatly started to sweat bill got up and hugged her ginny stifened but slightly relaxed
they walked down to the table and ginny sat down
GINNY 'S P.O.V
i sat down and my mom smiled at me and placed food on my plate we started talking i stayed quiet but i knew they were looking at me
what if they thaoght i was crazy ?
did they think i was mental ?
did they care were they just going to send me away when i was to much to handle ?
i sat there im sweating i feel my heart beat fast i bite my lip and i taste blood i claw at my hand with my nails and i hear nothing i hear nothing everything is distant
"gin are you ok "said ron
i nod but i start to have the feeling panick attack i feel like im dying i try to stand up i push my chair back but then i feel myself go out i fall to the floor they all stand up i feel a hand around my waist and they help me up
"sorry im so sorry "i said
"ginny stop you did nothing wrong " charlie said
"im fine im fine "i said i was i got up but i looked around ron was looking concerned they rest were the same bill helped me up and he took me upstairs
we opened the door and bill helped me sit on the bed
"ginny look calm down ok your bleeding its fine just calm down look we are leaving today to romania ok just calm down "he said
i nod "could you use reparo on me i asked the nuse but she said i cant be fixed like that "i said i saw his face break and he hugged me close i held on to him
the train started to move i sat next to ron as he ate bill infront of me as the train moves by slowley i pick up my fork and i eat. reading books hepled me i read books with lots if words because i liked to feel like i was swimming in them i looked at the little doodles in the book i wanted ti write a book on anxiety
i had baught so many books on my problems and read stories of other people who had them i wanted to write one
it got dark really dark as the train moved by
"come on bed bed time lets go "mom said she smiled at me as i walked by i got into my pigama botoms and the jursey charlie gave me i layed down and bill got in next to me and kissed my head and he hit the pillow and fel asleep i snugled close to him and fell asleep
my nightmare went like this
i'm walking carying two little figures on my sholder one is named depretion the other is named anxiety we are walking and i dont want them i want to get rid of them because they make me want to hurt myself they are bad fir me
we stop at a river it has sharp rocks around it it looks deep and i know i could drown or get stabed by a rock i drop them in the river
i start to walk but they beg me to come back so i stop and turn and stand at the edge of the small clif i threw them off of
they neg me tell me they need me that i need them and they are trying to help me so i jump in i grab them and they use me to get out i ask for help but they satand there i start to sink
im sinking loosing air as they cheer and clap they got what they wanted as i sink and drown
i wake up.
its about 7:30 am and i lay there bill is laying on his side his back to me and i lay there as tears well up in my eyes not because i was scared only because i did not under stand it
i start to panick i feel like im drowning but i stay quiet fearing i will wake bill im red in the face and there are tears streaming down my face and the moon shining through the train window ilumintated it i lay on my side away from bill and i lay there for an hour
"ginny time to get up " bill said
"ill be down in a bit " i said
"ok then "bill said and he left i lay in bed wanting to understand why that happened what the dream ment
i must have layed down there for hours i checked the clock, i had woken up at 7:30 a.m it was late afternoon it was 1:16 i lay still i was as heavy as lead and ocean of worry ways me down in bed
i finally get up and i get to the floor and i change into black jeans my sweater boots a thin white rain proof sweater and a red shirt
i walk to the isle and sit in from of ron eating he smiles and continues to eat
i grab my fork and eat as i lean against the window because i know we are almost there i get up go to the bed area and turn my bag into a back pack i then walked back and sat there ron finished eating and played a game of chess with charlie who had come to sit next to me
i sat there for the next hour doing nothing just thinking looking out the window
i walk around diagon ally lost my family is pobrobly screaming for me but if they are i can not hear them
im using magic outside of school and i totaly dominated the systym they can never catch me i lerned to much dark magic to much charms to much things over the summer and all in secret
still im strolling around with my wand looking for a familiar face to ask them for derections because i am lost then i see fred and george who are looking for me
probrobly
i walk up and they immeadiatly hug me i can only roll my eyes and smile slighty
"ginny we were woried sick were did you run of to "said mom who had seen me and also gave me a hug percy and dad and ron standing by her side
"oh i was with you guys but then my head started to hurt and i sat somewere and waited for it to go away and then i lost you "i said as if i did it all the time
oh i did do it all the time
" well lets go we need to meet up with harry "percy said i let them drag me away i got on the floor my back on the floor my legs sitting on the seat i was upside down with a book in my hand as hermionie talked with ron and seconds later they were arguing about the cat and the rat
"the cat want to kill scabers " said ron who was flushed
"its called nature ron the food chain " said hermionie i saw a figure at the top of the stairs but did not care to see who it was i fliped a page as hermionie stabed a finger into rons chest
"you know these are some intense ways of flirting "i said turning the page again
" ginny tell her that her stupid cat is a menice "said ron
" tell ron to stop being a thick head " hermionie said she was also flushed. i smirked i bet they were going to marry each other
"how about you complain to the person over there "i said pointing behind them to the figure at the bottom of the stairs without tacking my eyes of the page. i fliped another page
they must have relized that the figure was waiting for them to stop fighting
"harry "i heard hermionir shriek and i roled my eyes
"hey mate " ron said harry said nothing but i paid no attention to them just fliped another page
" hey ginny "i heard harry say to me
"heyyyy"i said but did not move just fliped another page wow this muggle book was boreing
"hey hermionie i thought you said winnie the pooh was a good book its just pictures and little words "i said as i let the book fall on my face open the pages aginst my face
"it is if your the right person " she said and came over
" oh so great im the wrong person "i said and got the book of me and stood up and gave it to hermionie she looked put out and i walked past and ron looked at hermionie and then followed me
"gin she did not mean it in a wrong way " said ron as i rumaged for a "good book ". "
i took out a book and waved it infront of ron
"this is a good book thats a bunch of crap "i wisper yelled he frowned
" gin just go say sorry " he said
"how about i punch you " i said i was not angry not at all but eh might as well see what he would do
he just frowned i decided to leave so i left .i sat next to fred
"hey-" he said but i interupted while i looked at my good book and only at my book
" im mad so dont " i said he noded