I do, Augustus.

I do.

I closed my laptop, then opened it again and reread his letter. It was beautiful, heartbreaking. Even in his time of death he came up with perfect metaphors. Even in his time of death, he told Van, a thousand miles away at the time, that he loved me. That I was delicate and graceful yet smart and meaningful. Reading that note made him alive again and it made me cry knowing that he wasn't. That he was never coming back. He was capital-S Somewhere and I wasn't there with him.

But I could be. I just had to take out these stupid nubbings, suffer the suffocation, then see him again. We could be together in his home in capital-S Somewhere. Just seperate myself from the oxygen…

Suddenly, the phone rang. I was right next to it, so I just picked it up. "Hello?"

"Hazel Grace?" Said a british voice. He sounded like a man in his mid-twenties with a bit of a childish tone.

"Yes?"

"I know what you were about to do, Hazel."

"Who are you?"

"Just someone trying to help." He replied after a two-second hesitation.

I wanted to hang up. I really did. "What did you mean you knew what I was going to do?"

"Hazel Grace Lancaster, I want you to hear me, focus on my voice, and not take those nubbings from your nose."

I was speechless for a moment. "Are you looking through my window? Who are you?!"

A sigh. "I know about Augustus and how much he meant to you."

I still couldn't hang up. I felt… drawn. "Okay, so does everyone else, stalker."

"Listen, you deserve to live."

I fell silent.

"Look out your window, Hazel." He said.

I glanced out at the starless sky outside. "What about it?"

"How many stars do you see?"

I looked harder, but saw none. "Zero."

"Wait a moment." There was silence, then suddenly, as if someone had turned a switch, stars filled the night sky and twinkled. Never before have I ever seen the stars more clearly as I did that night, and I never will again. "How many now?" He asked.

"Hundreds."

He sighed. "Think bigger."

"Thousands?"

"Bigger."

"Millions?"

"Bigger."

I was getting a little frustrated. "Billions?"

"An infinity."

Silence.

"Hazel, every star has a purpose, but none are perfect. Some have faults that keeps them from having a longer lifespan than the rest, but they're still a star. They each have their little infinity in the bigger infinity as every other star."

"Are you comparing us with stars?"

"No, it's just a metaphor. Look, Hazel, Augustus is gone but his existence remains. He will never be gone as long as he is remembered. You still remember him, Hazel, right?"

"Yes."

"Then he's still here. You may not feel his presence, you may wish he was next to you, but know that he is. As long as you remember."

As long as I remember. "Okay."

"You know of the infinities. The big ones and the little ones; how the gap between numbers 1 and 2 may seem small but they have their little infinity. You and Augustus had your little infinity, but you're alive to make it longer by being able to remember him in this world."

My eulogy. So people did pay attention to what I had to say. "Are you related to Gus?"

I thought I heard a smile on the line. "No, but I did do him a favor. A delivery run, you could say."

I realized I had a tear running down my cheek. I wiped it and sniffled. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome, Hazel."

"Who are you?"

He paused. "I help those who need it. Kind of like a doctor, but… different. I call people on my mobile phone instead of from an office." He laughed. Was it an inside joke? "I know what it's like to lose someone you love. It tears you apart without the feeling of pain. It eats you up without killing. It's traumatic and miserable. But, as hard as it is, we move on with our lives.

"But," he continued, "We never forget. Never forget the lives that touched us. Never forget the fun memories. Never forget Augustus Waters, okay Hazel?"

"Okay."

A chuckle. "Okay will always be your 'always'." Then he hung up.

I will never forget you, Augustus Waters. I will move on with my life, live it to its fullest. I may even get married and have children if I live long enough. But I will never forget you. Your story will be told to others like my future husband and children. Heck, maybe I'll become a social worker.

And that's why I wrote this book. And if you're reading this, Augustus, know that your story, your life, has become a much bigger infinity than anyone could imagine. Your story could touch the lives of many readers.

But never like how you touched me. You changed me, Augustus, in ways you can't imagine, and that's more than okay.