Does he love you?
Summary: The graveshift gang goes out to a kareokebar and Catherine's true feelings come shining through in this little drama.
Rated: T
Characters: Catherine, Gil, Sara and the rest of the team.
Feedback: Yes, please!
1/1
It was early Saturday night. Laughter and talk flowed from the two tables, the gang had put together after entering the bar. They had all agreed to meet here a couple of hours before shift began.
Most of them had only had a beer or a glass of wine. Catherine however had the night off so she was on her second drink, when Nick suggested they all tried out the karaoke machine. All of them shook their head in an effort to say no, but Nick was not finished.
"Come on pretty please" he pleaded with Sara.
"Seriously Nick, why don't you just get up on that stage yourself, we all know that's what you want" she shot back with a smile.
"Well... ok" he said with a toothy smile and walked to the small stage.
He chose a song and the others turned to listen to him. When Right Said Fred's "I'm too sexy" started all of them laughed and clapped. Nick actually had a nice singing voice and his charm even made three young women sitting at the bar take notice. Nick noticed and began making eyes and waved at the young women.
"Hey, down boy" Warrick shouted.
After the song Nick took his place besides Catherine.
"Your turn" he said and emptied the last of his beer.
"Oh no you don't" she began but Greg jumped in.
"Sara I challenge you and Catherine to do a duet?" he said with his boyish charm.
Sara gave Catherine a look. She actually felt like having fun and doing a duet might be fun and help a little with the strain in their relationship. In the last months Sara had seen how Catherine had grown more and more suspicious of any contact Sara had with Grissom. If Sara had to guess she would say Catherine was jealous, which was just plain stupid she thought. She had no interest in Grissom, Nick however, that was another story.
"What do you say Catherine?" Greg said. "I'll find the perfect song for you to sing"
Catherine felt a bit lightheaded after her second double up. Maybe this really was a good idea. In the last months she had felt like Sara was taking all of Grissom's attention, and she had finally admitted to herself that she was jealous. She loved Gil Grissom. There had always been chemistry but none of them ever acted on it. After her realization she had become even less encouraged to act on her feelings. She now feared rejection and every time she saw Sara with Grissom, she felt nervous and even shy at times. She was tired of feeling shy, sad and scared. She wanted to have fun and forget about her own heartache for a couple of minutes. She drowned the last of her drink and turned to Greg.
"You better pick a good song," she said with an approving smile as Greg jumped up to find a song.
Gil sat watching as Catherine and Sara got up and walked to the little stage. He was always taken aback by Catherine's beauty. Even tonight where she was wearing a simple white tank top and a pair of dark blue jean and black high-heeled boots he couldn't take his eyes off of her. A pair of sparking gold hoop earrings dangled from her ears and soft curls framed her face. She wore simple make up. A bit of sparkling eye shadow, mascara and a bit of lip-gloss. And she looked absolutely amazing to him. He sighed a bit as Catherine was handed a microphone as she made a joke with Warrick and Mia and laughed at something Jim shouted at her.
Recently he had missed her. A lot. Missed seeing her smile like she did now. It seemed like she had decided not to talk to him, smile at him, touch him or even work with him unless he specifically requested it. He had asked Sara once if she knew why but Sara was clueless. A week ago he had tried to ask her out for breakfast, but before he could get around to ask her, Nick and Warrick convinced her to go out to brunch with them. He remembered vividly how she had looked at him before turning to go with the two. He could have sworn her eyes had pleaded with him to make her stay but only for a second, then she was back to her recent behavior where she almost refused to meet his eyes.
"You girls ready" Greg shouted.
Both of them nodded. Sara gave Catherine a reassuring pad on the arm.
"Hey Cath you know, I'm your friend right?" she suddenly felt like it was important to state that and the informal surroundings made it sort of okay to say something so personal in a light voice.
"Sure" Catherine said and gave Sara a smile. For a second it felt like everything was back to the time before she began wondering if there was really something going on between Sara and Gil.
"I'll go first" she said to Sara just as the music began and the two turned towards the monitors. Catherine felt her blood froze as she saw the first lines of the song. She had listened to the song on repeat lately. A new version of the old Reba McEntire classic with Martina Mcbride and Kelly Clarkson had made its way to the cd she listened to in her car and the cd in her player at home.
But all she could do was to sing. Quitting would be too obvious and Sara didn't seem affected. Catherine's soft voice filled the room and people from a lot of tables turned to see who was singing. At first she starred directly at Sara.
Catherine:
I've known about you for a while now
When he leaves me he wears a smile
Now as soon as he's away from me
In your arms is where he wants to be
After her first lines all Catherine could do was look straight at Gil as Sara started singing.
Sara:
But you're the one he rushes home to
You're the one he gave his name to
I've never seen his face in the early morning light
You have his mornings his daytimes
And sometimes I have his nights
Both:
But does he love you (does he love you)
Like he loves me (like he loves me)
Does he think of you (does he think of you)?
When he's holding me
Does he whisper all of his fantasies?
Does he love you (does he love you)?
Like he's been loving me
Gil's eyes never left Catherine's. He could see how her stone cold eyes slowly began to transform into two blue orbs of hurt and tears. The other team members also noticed. Jim gave Greg a stare that would have killed even the hardest gang member instantly.
Catherine felt the entire room zoom in on her. What had she been thinking not checking which song Greg had chosen before getting up here. She felt tears threaten to fall and had to bit the inside of her cheek to keep them at bay. She saw the worry in Sara's eyes before Sara hesitantly sang the next part.
Sara:
But when he's with me
He says he needs me
And that he wants me
That he believes in me
Catherine felt herself literally flinching at the words coming from Sara's mouth. And how many pairs of worried eyes were now settled on her. Including Gil's. Sara motioned for Greg to end the song, but Catherine gave him a look that made him stay put.
Catherine:
And when I'm in his arms
How he swears there's no one else
Is he deceiving me?
Or am I deceiving myself
She kept looking directly at Gil but at the end of her part she softly shock her head in disbelief. She had been so stupid. A single tear rolled down her cheek as they kept on singing. Her voice thick with tears but she didn't care. All she wanted to do was sing the entire song and then leave.
Both:
Does he love you (does he love you)?
Like he loves me (like he loves me)
Does he think of you (does he think of you)?
When he's holding me
And does he whisper all of his fantasies?
Does he love you (does he love you)?
Like he's been loving me
Catherine:
Oooh shouldn't I loose my temper?
Sara:
Oooh shouldn't I be ashamed?
Catherine:
Cuz I have everything to loose
Sara:
I have nothing to gain
Catherine decided she was done. She was so mad at herself, how had she let herself be so humiliated. She had kept her feelings on the inside for so long now.
Both:
Does he love you (does he love you)?
Like he loves me (like he loves me)
Does he think of you (does he think of you)?
When he's holding me
Does he whisper you all of his fantasies
Does he love you (does he love you)?
Like he's been loving me
Sara stopped singing halfway through the chorus and just stood there.
"Catherine, please stop" she tried but was given a long stare and fell silent.
When Catherine reached the end of her sentence she dropped the microphone and headed for the door. First with slow strides but then she picked up pace and began running. She pushed open the door and ran into the cool night onto the parking lot. Suddenly she remembered she had ridden with Gil to the bar and cursed herself. She decided to take a cab home and began heading towards the main road only to feel someone taking a hold of her wrist. Gil had come out running after her and saw her running towards the road. He reached her and pulled her to him. She struggled against him.
"Catherine" he said. She refused to listen and kept on fighting his tight hold.
"Catherine" he raised his voice slightly.
"Let go of me" was the only answer he got.
"Catherine look at me" his voice was high and forceful and made her jump. He took a deep breath he knew the next line would determine if they had a future together.
She looked at him giving him a second to find the right words. When nothing came she forced herself to look into the night at a spot behind him. She felt the tears well up again.
"I never... I hope you know..." Gil began but he was suddenly nervous. He saw her head rise and her eyes lock with his.
"Damnit" he said frustrated he had so many things to say, but didn't know where to start. She sensed his nervousness.
"Gil?" she spoke softly.
"It's always been you Catherine. I swear I've never been interested in anyone else" he emphasized the anyone part." He said. He saw hope and warmth spread in her eyes at his words.
"But I..." she began.
"Catherine I love you"
There. He said it. She looked at him. Was it surprise or shock? He really couldn't say.
"Please say something Catheri..." he began before her lips crashed into his. Her hands went into his hair and down his neck to rest around his neck and shoulder. As he kissed her back with passion she almost clung to him, her hands clawing at his back as if she couldn't get close enough to him.
After a while they both needed air. He was lightheaded both from the kiss and his declaration of love. She looked up at him with a smile but then frowned a bit and gave him a big slap on the arm.
"Aouch" he said looking at her with surprise. "Why'd you do that?"
"Well, it took you long enough" she said before she reached up and kissed him again.
Inside the bar the karaoke machine played the song to the end:
Ooooh
Does he love you?
Watch the song Does he love me - Martina McBride and Kelly Clarkson live, at the Reba Giants, at the Kodak theater of Los Angeles in November of 2006 here: