OK SO THIS IS MY FIRST FANFCTION SO PLEASE DO ME A FAVOR AND REVIEW TELLING ME HOW I DID.
Alone in this house again tonight
I got the T.V. on
The sound turned down
and a bottle of wine
Beck was sitting down in his R.V. alone just watching T.V. with the volume down and with a bottle of wine in his hands not even bothering putting it in a cup, thinking about Jade
There's pictures of you and I on the walls around me
The way that that is was and could have been surrounds me
I'll never get over you
Walking away
Looking around he saw all the pictures of him and Jade together hanging up on the walls. Pictures of them laughing, kissing, and just having a great time. He wishes that they were still together still doing the same thing as they were before in the present time as well. It has been a year since the break-up happened and he still hasn't moved on from her. He has nightmares of her walking away when they split up
I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that being strong meant never losing your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with this pride
Let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry
Beck has always been the cool, calm, and relaxing kind of guy that never really worries about things. He thought that just bottling it up and maybe forgetting about some of the things will make him look stronger, make him look like a fighter, but he just can't do that anymore. He can't. He's still sitting down on the couch but this time he's drunk and he's crying. He's finally letting out the pain that's been inside of him for a year. He feels tired and just wants to lay down and sleep. But he can't he's too busy thinking about Jade, the love of his life, the person he loved-no wait scratch that- still loves. All he can really do is just sit there feeling hot tears run down his face thinking about his Jade.
Would it help if I turned a sad song on
All by myself would sure hit me hard now that your gone
Or maybe unfold some old yellow lost love letters
It's going to hurt bad before it gets better
I'll never get over you
By hiding this way
He saw his laptop sitting next to him on the bed, he grabbed it, opened it then went onto his ITunes playlist seeing the song "All by myself'' by Celin Dion, thinking that that song was perfect for this moment he played it. Remembering the love letters they wrote when they were together and never throwing them away he got up and stumbled over, to one of his drawers opening it finding all of their letters there, he took some back to his bed and started reading them. He had a hard time reading them though because of his drunken haze and tears. He hasn't gone out very much as he used to even his parents worry about him. Tori, Andre, Robbie, and Cat once in a while would go over there trying to get him to get out of his R.V. Cat like I said wasn't there very often because she was mostly hanging out with Jade (who which by the way doesn't think about the break-up as much as he does)
Cause I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that being strong meant never losing your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with this pride
Let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry
Looking at the letters just makes him cry more. 'guess I was never that strong' he thought as he got up, went and turned the lights off and went back to bed crying himself to sleep thinking about the love of his life,Jade wondering what the hell he did to deserve this kind of pain.