1. Try extreme sports.
2. Wear super high heels. Just… don't fall.
3. Become accustomed to random growth spurts. Nothing totally out of the ordinary. Unless, of course, you grow from 5 to 8 feet overnight.
4. Speak "Car and Driver".
5. Junk food is now your friend, not your enemy. Embrace it, eat it, love it. Paul does.
6. Be aware that once a werewolf turns back into a human… He will be butt-naked. Not that it's a bad thing.
7. Do not befriend vampires, no matter how vegetarian they claim to be.
8. Punch him in the face. He'll think you're hilarious.
9. Offer to be his slave for life.
10. Do not be alarmed if you see him shaking and trembling in anger.
11. When he transforms into a wolf, do not say, "You're a DOG? Dammit, you men are all the same, aren't you? I guess mom was right about that."
12. Do say, "You're hot!" and mean it.
13. Tell him he's 108 degrees of pure sexy.
14. Talk to him about how much vampires stink.
15. Knowing how to cook is a must.
16. Bond with his friends, no matter how freakishly huge they are.
17. Ask permission BEFORE feeling up his eight pack.
18. If he stares at you like a blind man who's seeing the sun for the first time, just go with the flow.
19. Ask him to teach you how to ride a motorcycle.
20. Make fun of blondes. Particularly Rosalie. Especially Rosalie.
Who cares if she threatens to rip you to shreds and kill you? If you followed (and survived) our directions, you'd have a hot werewolf who's got your back by now!