The words kept ringing in Nico's ears.
"When you're ready to give me what I want, that's where I'll be."
"Since when do you give a damn about my personal life?"
They wouldn't leave him alone.
He tried to ignore them. He tried scotch. He tried music. He tried television, and a book, and a shower. But as he stood there underneath the hot water, Nico could still hear the words ringing in his ears.
Ten grand at Brown & Co. And Vera Dade in her hotel room.
A ring. And Vera Dade in her hotel room.
Engagement. And Vera Dade in her hotel room.
"Damn," he muttered, slamming the side of his fist into the shower wall.
Soon he was dressed and on his way, and yet he still tried to ignore the words.
He turned around twice and started his way back home. But every time he started home he kept hearing Matt's challenge, as well as Vera's sly invitation. And then he'd think of Dani's smile when she was with Matt, and he'd turn back around.
When he reached the door to Vera's hotel, he tried once more to leave. But here he was, and inside was Vera, who seemed to know him surprisingly well. She knew what it was like digging for other people's secrets all the time. She knew what his life was like because that's what her life was like.
"I live in the basement so you can live in the penthouse," he had told Donnally once. Tonight, both he and Vera were alone in the basement, and Donnally was indeed living in the penthouse. So with a steely look in his eyes, Nico knocked firmly on the door.
"Onyx," he said, when she opened the door. It seemed important to him. He wanted her to know about his cat. It was something that connected them. And tonight, Nico needed to be connected.
"Pardon?"
"My cat's name," he clarified. "It's Onyx."
"Oh," she said with a smirk. "It really was a lucky guess."
"Hmm," Nico exhaled, with a smirk of his own. He thought briefly how nice it was simply talking to her, how he didn't feel so alone anymore. "The wiretaps," he began after a second, "nothing illegal. They satisfy the one-party consent rule in New York State, and Pittman did," he finished, adding, "consent," as almost an afterthought. "So you have nothing on me, Vera," he said, both reassuring her and challenging her.
He watched as Vera searched his face, looking for any signs of dishonesty. "I sincerely hope that's true, Nico," she said softly. He gave her a slight smile.
"So you got everything you wanted?" Vera's eyes darkened.
"Almost everything." She grabbed his jacket then and pulled him closer, reaching up to press her lips roughly against his.
Nico was stunned for a moment, but let his lips mold around hers. When she pulled back, he opened his eyes and looked at her. Suddenly every frustration of the past four months came bubbling to the surface. Vera had lit a match in his stomach that set ablaze the accelerant of disappointed hopes.
Nico saw red.
He pushed forward, capturing her lips in a harsh, searing kiss. He wasted no time, guiding her back into her hotel room and closing the door behind them.
He was struck by how surprised he was at Vera's actions as he moved them toward her bed, stripping her of her shirt as he went. He should have seen the signs. Something primal had pushed him to come here tonight, and Vera had given him what should have been enough hints. But Nico hadn't come here to sleep with her. He had come to satisfy her inquiries, to get suspicion off of his back, to not feel so alone. Subconsciously, he realized, he had known this was going to happen. He wanted this.
He needed this.
Yes, he needed her hands running through his hair, over his now bare chest. He closed his eyes and his mind wandered. He began to imagine that it was Dani underneath him that when he opened his eyes, there she was. When they were totally done, Nico rolled off of her and pulled her to his chest. He closed his eyes again, inhaling her scent. And when she looked up at him, it was Dani who said, "That was incredible." He chuckled at her compliment.
"Thank you," he replied. "You weren't so bad yourself." Dani smiled, and then laid her head back on his chest. Nico sighed and burrowed his face into her hair, where he contented himself to fall asleep.
When he woke early the next morning, Nico was surprised to see Vera curled up against him. He stiffened for a moment, before realizing what had happened. Then, with a heavy sigh, he slowly disentangled himself from her arms. He threw his legs over the bed and sat running his hands through his hair for a moment. He shook his head and chuckled as reality sat in.
He was in deep, he knew. But last night had been so satisfying, even if it hadn't gotten his mind off of Dani. Taking advantage of Vera's offer was just what he needed, and it would always be infinitely preferable to spending the night alone, pining after Dani. So he was grateful that Vera had let him use her. And maybe, if he worked it just right, it could happen again.
Nico knew it was impossible to want Dani. He loved her, but had no right to approach her, especially if her relationship with Donnally had progressed so far. And as long as she was happy, he could be, too. So he would have to content himself with fantasies. And if those fantasies could be embodied in a person, so much the better. If his military training had taught him anything, it taught him how to make the most of a bad situation.
So yes, he was in over his head. Yes, there might be less destructive ways of dealing with his unrequited love. But Nico didn't allow himself to think of those avenues. This was the path he had chosen, the path to which he was drawn.
Nico looked back at Vera's sleeping form and felt a warmth flood his chest. This wasn't love. There was no doubt about that. It was just a convenience. And for that he would forever be glad for her.
Slowly, Nico rose and began the search for his clothes. He and Vera had been in a rush last night, so they were scattered all over the room. He found his boxers thrown over a chair, which he just managed to pull up to cover himself when Vera's alarm clock went off.
He watched as she stretched and reached over to turn it off. She opened her eyes and looked at him, a warm smile growing on her face. "Hmm… Good morning," she said.
"Good morning," Nico replied, smiling at her. He glanced around the room and located the rest of his clothes. "What time is your flight?"
"In a couple of hours," she responded. She sat up, pulling the sheet securely around her, tugging it free from the weight of the bed. Vera walked over to Nico and stood on her tiptoes to place a quick kiss on his lips. "You won't leave without saying goodbye, will you?" she asked as she headed toward the bathroom. Nico took the opportunity to walk over to his jeans as he answered:
"Of course not." While Vera was in the bathroom, Nico pulled on his pants with a satisfied smile on his face. Inside his jeans pocket he felt the flash drive he had brought with him last night. He had fully intended to simply hand it over to Vera, but he had never really considered that he would end up spending the night in her room. Now, with Vera in the bathroom, Nico found that the opportunity of going through her computer was simply too good to pass up.
Nico threw on his undershirt and walked over to Vera's computer. He sat down in front of it, attached the flash drive, and began to snoop. It was what he did best, after all.
He was finished with his work by the time Vera walked out. "You don't mind if I use this, do you?" he asked as he walked into the bathroom, the remainder of his clothing in his hands.
"Of course not," she said with a smile as moved toward the bed. Nico maintained eye contact with her until the door broke it for them as it was closed. He then quickly dressed before stepping out to meet her once more.
"This is atypical for me. No, no – more of an anomaly," she told him as he walked out, adjusting his jacket while he moved closer to her.
"Me too," Nico replied, sitting beside her on the bed. "A much needed anomaly," he added in a darker tone before pressing his lips against hers. When they pulled apart, Vera inhaled and said accusingly,
"I don't remember leaving my laptop open." Nico glanced behind him in the direction of the computer. He was sure that he'd put it back exactly as he found it. Not that it mattered too much, she would have found out he had been on it eventually. But it was a mistake Nico shouldn't have made.
Frowning he answered, "I figured I'd copy the files onto your computer. You know, save you some time," he finished turning back around to face her.
"Hmm," Vera murmured. "I got the access I wanted and so did you," she observed. Nico smiled.
"Hopefully we'll meet again," he said, voicing his hopes of a continued liaison. He kissed her then, determined to enjoy himself as long as he could.
"Here's to more anomalies," Vera joked as he stood up.
Nico walked over to the table where he had laid his phone and his keys the night before. Looking at his phone, he noticed that he didn't have any signal. Cocking his eyebrows, Nico looked up at Vera.
"I think I'm gonna need my SIM card if I'm gonna call you. Don't I?"
Vera rolled her eyes. She reached under the pillow next to her, and handed him the small chip, but not before remarking, "Eleven pictures of Onyx."
"He's my friend," Nico replied, taking the card from her.
"What about Dani?" Vera called as he started to walk away.
Upon hearing Dani's name, Nico froze. He turned around then, to look at Vera, trying his best to appear nonchalant.
"A lot of texts and phone calls." Nico swallowed before shrugging and answering:
"She's another friend."
Vera seemed satisfied. Nico gave her a slight smile and quickly made for the exit.
On the other side of the door, Nico let out a heavy sigh. Even doing his best to get over her, Dani seemed to be everywhere he turned. He walked slowly toward the elevator as he reinserted his SIM card, shaking his head, trying to rid Dani from his mind. Once his phone was back online, his screen blew up with notifications.
He had three missed phone calls and five text messages – and they were all from Dr. Danielle Santino.
Ugh, I am so not looking forward to this.
What time are you picking Terrence up this morning?
And what time do you think you'll get to court?
Nico, you didn't forget about court, did you?
Hello? Nico?
Nico stepped off of the elevator on the ground floor after reading all of Dani's messages. He quickly scrolled over to her name and pressed the "call" button. She picked up after two rings.
"Nico," Dani's voice rang sweetly in his ear, "thank God. I was beginning to worry you weren't going to show today," she finished with a nervous chuckle. Nico strode toward his car.
"I'm sorry I missed your calls, Doctor," he apologized. "I am on my way to TK's as we speak. Don't worry," Nico reassured her. "I'll be there."