ok so like im Actually so sorry blame bibi
welcome to the Only tokyo ghoul fic i have ever written
also the canon is all wonky. to fit my story because im a trash writer
basically just pretend like attack on anteiku arc never happened idk
ty and have a shit happy time reading im so sorry
The T.V.'s volume was down so low that Hide could barely hear the news reporter talking animatedly about the most recent ghoul-related events. Ten to eleven P.M. was the channel's time slot dedicated to ghoul activities, and while he normally tried to make sure dinner didn't fall within that time frame, tonight just hadn't worked out.
" - bodies belonging to the Aogiri Tree, an organized gang of dangerous ghouls, have been found scattered across the country. A representative of the CCG has stated that they believe an independent party is hunting down these monsters, and that they are looking into it. Either way, we should be thankful -"
Flick.
"Hey!" Hide yelps, and points his chopsticks across the table. "I was listening to that!"
Kaede frowns, and crosses her arms after tossing the remote across the room and onto the couch. "It's gross. We're eating."
"Gross?! It's important! You need to know this stuff, Kaede!" He groans, but continues to eat. He can watch the rest of it later, online. Kaede's been in a bad mood all week, and Hide really doesn't want to frustrate her more than normal.
"Important? Dad, all they talk about are things we already know. Ghouls are bad, be careful, don't go anywhere alone. I get it." She says while pushing the rice in her bowl around. Uninterested, not hungry; his mind supplies him.
Hide sighs. "Not- not all of them are bad, Kaede. You have to keep an open mind about these kinds of- "
He knows he's gone too far before he even says it, but he still has to.
"Keep an open mind?!" Kaede's eyes flicker up to meet his angrily, and she slams her chopsticks down next to her bowl. The loud bang makes Hide flinch slightly, but he doesn't break his eyes away from hers. "You always say stuff like that! It's not right! Ghouls aren't 'poor, misunderstood people,' dad! They're monsters!" She shouts, face red and spitting.
"Kaede-" He starts, but he doesn't have a chance to talk before she cuts in again.
"Is that what you'd tell mom if you could? Keep an open mind? Maybe she wouldn't be in one of their stomachs if she'd kept an open mind?" Kaede hisses, voice sharper than a knife.
Hide freezes.
Suddenly, it's as if the entire room has dropped a few degrees in temperature. Kaede is breathing heavily, eyes wide as saucers. "I- dad, I- I didn't mean-" She stumbles over her own words awkwardly.
He squeezes his eyes shut, and shakes his head. "It's alright. It's- it's alright. I-" He can't pretend like his chest isn't burning, but he can at least let her know he isn't angry.
Kaede's voice is a whisper, but her mumbled 'sorry' is as clear as day. She lurches out of her chair, and races out of the room.
Hide sighs again, and presses his palms against his eyes as hard as he can.
They barely speak to each other the next morning. Not for want of trying, on Hide's part, but Kaede is shut off and unresponsive. She says the little things, like 'thank you' when he pours her a bowl of cereal after getting his, and 'excuse me' when she gets up from the table to use the bathroom. Hide tries to strike up multiple conversations, but they all die off quickly.
He remembers a friend (best friend, only friend, his mind interjects) in his childhood that acted much the same way when his mother had died, and Hide couldn't have been angry with her even if he'd wanted to.
When he drops her off at school, she takes a moment longer than normal before leaving to mutter another quick apology. His heart hurts. Hide yells after her as she's leaving that he's not mad, and when she gets home they'll play a round of shogi together because he knows it's her favorite game, and he'll even let her win this time. He doesn't know whether or not she heard him, but Hide likes to think that she did.
At work, time seems to crawl by at a snail's pace. Hide's job with the CCG is boring, and that's how he likes it now. When he was younger, he dreamed of going out on dangerous missions with a task force and eventually, finally finding him. After getting married and having a daughter, he's changed and he knows it. He still has dreams, waking and sleeping, but he couldn't bear going through with them anymore. Especially not now. He's all Kaede has, and he refuses to let her go through losing another parent. Now, he works a desk job. He shuffles and organizes papers, takes calls and funnels information. It's boring, but it's safe.
Today, the office is abuzz. No one can seem to stop talking about the mystery Aogiri Tree bodies. Hide listens in with one ear as he fills out papers absentmindedly. The ghouls that are turning up dead are all confirmed Aogiri members. Interestingly, Hide hears, most of them are killed with wounds similar to Kagune puncture marks. A popular theory is a territorial fight between ghouls. The idea of a new gang trying to overthrow Aogiri is frightening at the least, and the whole office is alight with ideas and gossip.
Aogiri has been the main ghoul organization for the last twenty or so years. They're almost impossible to flush out, and even when it seems like the CCG has finally put down all of it's members, it seems to rise from it's own ashes to haunt them like a plague-ridden phoenix.
An unknown group taking out some of their current most prominent members and leaving the bodies for the world to see while hiding their own identities is almost unthinkable.
Hide chews his bottom lip, and worries about Kaede.
It's Friday morning, and things with Kaede have finally relaxed again over the past two days. Hide is relieved; it's almost like a weight has been pulled off his chest. She's apologized a few more times before finally letting it go, and last night they'd played a fantastic game of shogi. For the first time, Kaede'd had him backed so far into a corner that he had thought he was going to lose. Hide managed to turn it around at the end, but it was one of the most exciting games they'd played together.
Kaede shuffles over to him, hair disheveled and yawning. "Dad, pour me one too?" She asks while pulling the milk out of the fridge. Hide looks down at the cereal box in his hand, and grins.
"Of course, pumpkin!" He chortles, and shakes the box at her.
Kaede stares at him for a few moments, before looking at the cereal box harshly. "That's... Halloween themed cereal. Some of those marshmallows are shaped like pumpkins." To her credit, her voice only cracks at the end.
Hide cackles, and shakes the box even harder.
Kaede puts her head in her hands and groans. "Why did you even buy that stuff? You know that gross festive cereals never taste as good as the originals."
"I don't know," He shrugs, and grabs an extra bowl for her from the shelf. "I guess I felt like celebrating. We never really do anything for Halloween, and it's this weekend."
Kaede suddenly averts her eyes, and looks sheepish. "A-about that..." She mutters, and twirls a spoon in her fingers. "Well, I got invited to go hang out with one of my friends this weekend. For Halloween. I was wondering... if it would be ok for me to go?"
Hide wants to say 'No! Stay here with me, and we'll watch scary movies and eat popcorn and candy like we do every year!' But that's what he wants, and he knows she wouldn't have any fun if he forced her to stay home and spend the holiday with him.
"Of course, pumpkin! Go free, fly with the wind!" He gives Kaede an exaggerated bow, and she smacks him on the head lightly. When he looks back up, she's giggling.
"Thanks, dad. And I'll be careful." She says softly, and Hide smiles back.
It's Halloween night, and he hasn't gotten a single Trick-or-Treater yet. He's sitting on the couch looking like an idiot wearing a shitty store-bought wolf costume (that he'd only bought on a whim because it reminded Hide of a Halloween spent with him that felt like a thousand years ago) and gripping a bowl of candy. The bowl keeps slipping out of his giant paws, because he can't flex his fingers inside the furry gloves well enough to keep it straight. Even worse, one of the cheap ears is flopping down in his face. The cardboard keeping it straight must have bent, and Hide thinks it's getting very, very annoying.
A crash splits through his thoughts. Hide almost jumps out of his skin, and leaps off the couch after haphazardly rolling the candy bowl onto the coffee table. Some pieces tumble out, but he doesn't care.
A couple of thuds, and then a smaller crash is about the moment where Hide realizes someone's in his backyard. His body feels stiff, and he slowly reaches for Kaede's dirty old baseball bat that he'd meant to toss out, but had ended up leaving it in the living room instead.
Worst case possibilities are pouring through his mind, and Hide takes a few hesitant steps towards the back door. It's a simple sliding glass door, but it's so dark outside that he can't see through it. Next to the door is a light switch for the outside lights, and he switches it on nervously.
There, in the very back of his backyard and barely illuminated by the dull lights is a heaving black form. Hide wants to scream, but he's not sure his mysterious visitor has noticed him yet. He kind of wants to put that off for as long as he possibly can.
Hide watches with trepidation as the form rolls over, seemingly... shaking? When whoever it is (as he can see now that it's unmistakably a person) turns over, the light finally reveals what Hide hadn't noticed before.
They're hurt. The person is curling in on themself, holding their side. He can't see it very well, but it looks like a large gash. Blood is seeping everywhere, staining the light gray cement red.
Hide curses, and throws open the door. He keeps the baseball bat in one hand just in case, but he rushes across the patio and kneels next to the -man? Definitely a man, Hide thinks.
"Hey! Shit, hold on, I'm gonna bring you inside and call the hospital!" Hide babbles and snakes an arm around the man's side to hoist him up, being careful not to pull to hard or touch on the wound there.
The man starts violently as Hide gets him to his feet. "N- no- no hospital-" His denial is cut short by a groan of pain and a short cough. Blood dribbles down his chin, and Hide gulps. He's not going to force the man to a hospital if he doesn't want to go, but he's not sure if he can treat this by himself.
Hide manages to support the man into his house, ignoring the repeated mutterings of 'no' and 'let me go.' He gingerly lays the man down onto the couch and his guest immediately curls in on himself, holding his side and hissing. In the fluorescent bright light, Hide can finally get a good look at his mysterious visitor. He sports a matted head of dirty white hair, and is clad in a strange skintight black jumpsuit with an... interestingly open back. Hide has never seen anything like what the man is wearing, but he figures it must be some sort of Halloween costume. An attacked partier, then? It seems likely, but something still seems off. Hide can't put his finger on it, but something just generally feels... off about the man.
Hide rushes into the bathroom and snags the first aid kit as fast as he can. He's back at the man's side in seconds, popping open the thin box's clasp and pulling out a gauze bandage roll.
"Okay- okay- okay, you're gonna have to pull that costume off, buddy. Can you move or should I cut it off?" Hide asks, and hopes that the man is coherent enough to answer him.
"Leave it... alone." The man struggles back to his feet and takes a step towards the door before crumbling down to the floor again. "F- fuck!" He hisses, and his black fingernails scrape against the wood floor. "It'll heal on it's own... thank you... for the concern, but..." It's like every word is painful for the man to push out. Hide isn't surprised that they are, the gash in his side looks deep.
"No- I won't take you to a hospital, but you can't just leave that alone. Please, just let me help you, alright?" He grinds out, and maneuvers to help the man back onto the sofa.
The man's face is still obscured by his long bangs, but it's turned to the side slightly now, watching his blood soak into the couch's pristine white cushions. "I'm... bleeding all over your stuff... sorry... "
Hide shakes his head, and lightly pushes the man back. "It's alright, I don't care. Just let me help you, alright?" He notices a zipper on the front of the man's jumpsuit, and tries to chuckle reassuringly. "I'm gonna pull this down so we can get at your side, alright?"
He doesn't get a response, so Hide takes that as a go-ahead and pulls the tiny white zipper down. Actually looking at it, the gash isn't as bad as he thought, but it's still big enough to be a problem. He runs into the kitchen and returns with a clean washcloth, and presses it against the wound. "We're just gonna try to stop the bleeding, ok? Don't pass out on me now."
The man scoffs, or at least tries to, and shakes his head awkwardly. "This isn't... that bad. I won't... pass out... from something like this."
Hide smiles. "Of course you won't. So, wanna tell me how you got this?" He'd taken a first aid class once in college. Talk to them, ask them questions. It keeps their minds working and lowers the risk of fainting.
"I... got into a... fight." The white-haired man whispers.
Nodding, Hide pulls up the washcloth to check and reapplies it. "I sure hope the other guy got away with some scratches too, right?"
"He's... dead." Hide almost freezes up, but doesn't. The man continues. "Don't... worry. He was a... ghoul. Would have... killed more."
Hide feels numb and acts almost on autopilot. He grabs the tiny bottle of antiseptic from the first-aid kit and soaks a gauze pad with it. "This is going to sting really bad, okay?" He warns, and dabs the man's side. Hide can feel him seizing up underneath his fingers, but not a sound escapes the man's mouth. He pulls away and grabs the gauze wrap. It's easy to reach around the man and start wrapping his wound. "So how did you get into the fight with the ghoul?" Hide asks.
The man answers after a moment. "I... found him. And killed... him."
"Are you an investigator? I don't think I've ever seen you, but-" Hide's almost sure that this man isn't with the CCG, but he asks anyways.
"No. I'm... not." Right again. "So... I've been dying... to ask. What's with the... furry costume?" The man's voice comes out lighter, and Hide is almost thrown all the way back to high school, it's so familiar.
Hide shrugs it off, and laughs awkwardly as he reaches around the man's midsection again. "It's my Halloween costume, silly." He chuckles.
The man pauses. "Hallo...ween? It's Halloween?"
Ah. Well. Hide sighs.
"Yep!" He nods as enthusiastically as he can, and rips off the end of the bandage. "There we go! All done!" Hide gives the man a thumbs up, and the white head finally turns up-
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Hide's eyes blow wide, and although his 'guest' is saying something, he can't hear a word over the raging chant growing in the back of his head.
He's older, angles sharper and harder, but Hide would recognize that face no matter what.
Hide's suddenly ten again, meeting his best friend for the first time. His mouth hangs open in a tiny 'o' and his shaking voice is nothing more than a slight whisper.
"Kaneki?"
Kaneki looks at him wildly, and Hide wants to cry, cry, cry, cry. Look at him, he wants to shout. Look at my best friend. I never really got another one, you know. It was always Kaneki, and now he's here. I just bandaged up my best friend. Kaneki! Kaneki, Kaneki, Kaneki, kaneki, kanekikanekikanekikanekikaneki Kaneki!
Oh my god, Hide thinks. It's Kaneki.
Kaneki moves to stand, and Hide grabs his arm harder than he probably should. "No! Kaneki, sit down, wait- don't go, hold on-" Kaneki looks like a deer in headlights under his bangs, grey eyes darting everywhere like he's trying to find some escape route that doesn't include dealing with Hide.
With a forceful tug, Kaneki stays sitting. "Hide- please, I really... should leave right now-"
"No!" Hide shouts. "No, you can't just walk in here and then leave me all over again!"
Kaneki flinches, and won't look him in the eye. "I wasn't really... here in the first place, it was a... total accident-" He scratches his jaw awkwardly, and Hide sees white.
"Please, Kaneki, please! Just," Hide releases Kaneki's arm and wrings his hands. Kaneki looks down at the floor and shifts uncomfortably. Whether he's trying to lift the pain in his side or he's nervous, Hide can't tell. Hide always used to be able to tell. The idea that he can't read Kaneki like an open book anymore sends a shiver up his back.
"I..." Kaneki murmurs.
"You know, when I was younger, I always dreamed about finding you again."
Kaneki jerks up and stares at him with wide eyes. Hide notices a thousand tiny things, like the dark circles under his eyes and the thin sheen of sweat glistening on his skin.
"It was my life's goal. The one day, one day, eventually- I'd get to meet you again. And we'd be best friends again, like nothing had ever changed. I knew you were out there somewhere, and it was just a matter of catching up to you." Kaneki is still staring at him like he can't believe Hide exists, and Hide bites his lip. "I realized after a while, though, that those dreams were pretty much all nonsense. Even if I did find you we'd never go back to being the way we were before everything happened. I even gave up on really finding you. I was content being sure that you were out there somewhere, and that if you ever came back I'd be here for you."
Hide feels his stomach drop out from under him when he looks Kaneki in the eye and sees tears forming. "I guess I just wanted to let you know. That you know- I'm- I'm still here. I know you've moved on and all, but I'm still here. I'm still waiting for you to come home." Kaneki shakes like a leaf, and finally stumbles to his feet. He walks stiffly to the back door he came in through, and stops.
"I... thank you, Hide. Thank you. I-" He hands his head, and clenches his fists. Hide feels his chest clench, too. "I really do... have to go. But..." Kaneki shakes his head a bit and turns around slightly. His eyes are shadowed. "I know this is... selfish and wrong of me, after all this time, but... would it be alright if I dropped by tomorrow? I promise, I promise, I promise I'll come back. I promise."
Hide stares at him and it feels like the stars are dancing in the sky just for them, happy twinkling lights blinking in and out and screaming It's Kaneki!
Kaneki slips out the door, and disappears into the night.