Title: Everything I've Ever Needed to Know I've Learned from Buffy

Author: NickyJean

Summary: Lex and Chloe have a chat about good and evil.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not marvel, not WB, not DC, not the Buffster, not Smallville. I just live in this little box, that I rent and eat food that I borrowed.

A/N: OK warning, this is pretty Buffy orientated so if you don't watch that too you might get confused. You also might belong in a cave….hey it's a great show. Also I am channeling myself through Chloe so no, I don't claim to know how Chloe really feels about Buffy, Lex or anyone else involved. Plus I do have another story out there but I just had to get this out of my brain before I could continue. Thank you for your continued patronage. Please R/R….Thanx Kathryn for Beta'ing my story…you are one awesome person…

It started the way these things normally do: at the Talon. I was looking out the window waiting, like always, for Clark. At least this time it wasn't to moon over him. Yet, once again, he was MIA. The only reason I allowed myself to wonder about his whereabouts is because he owed me an article. An article that I had to edit and get in the paper by the end of the week. Just another item to add to the list of reasons to be grumpy today. Again I glare at the clock. I can't decide whether I wished time would move faster or go in reverse.

"Ms. Sullivan," Lex Luthor said in a voice that demanded attention.

I realize now that I wish time would go at warp speed as I reluctantly acknowledge his existence. "Mr. Luthor." As the words fell from my lips I wish I could bite them back. Maybe if I pretended I didn't hear him he would have gone away leaving me 'lost in my thoughts.' I knew what was coming next.

"Call me Lex." I smile patronizingly at him and wished I had a dollar for every time he said that. Do you think that it can be patented? That would be lovely. Then he would just have to come up with another catch phrase. "Lana mentioned you were here waiting for Clark. When do you expect him?"

Was he still talking? Damn. His questioned forced me once again to stare at the clock. "About ten minutes ago." I didn't even bother to keep the edge out of my voice, why bother it's only "Mr. Luthor."

A look passed over Lex's face. Almost like amusement. If I blinked I would have missed it. I might have thought it funny if it were anyone but him. I mean, I do blame him as much as Lana for the lack of quality Clark-time that Pete and I have been suffering from since he arrived.

"Don't worry, Mr. Luthor, I'll send Clark trotting on to you as soon as I get my article." I say the words with a smile on my face trying to keep the resentment away.

Ignoring my obvious hint, he took a seat opposite me. "So 'Ms. Sullivan,' what's your take on Clark? I mean you must have some opinion on the constant….things that occur in his presence."

"Nope," as I say the word I realize how true it is. I don't need to know what's going on. If he wanted me to know he'd tell me. It wasn't like a secret society I wasn't invited into because no one else knew either. "Everyone's entitled to their secrets."

"Chloe, I'm surprised. I thought 'Inquiring minds would want to know.'"

I look up at him curiously noticing the smirk on his face.

"I said that out loud, huh." The surprise on my face must have given me away because Lex laughed. He actual laughed at me.

"Well, its good to know I've finally found a way to get the intrepid reporter off guard."

"Yes, one mention of Clark and I'm all a flutter," the sarcasm dripped from my lips and my eyes sparked with anger.

"And here I thought it was my presence," Lex looked properly chastised.

It's my turn as I laugh at him in return. It felt good, this honest laugh of mine. Lex tried to look hurt but his eyes dance with mischief.

After the laughter died Lex seemed to look me over. "So why 'aren't' you curious about Clark?"

"As long as he's fighting the good fight, who am I to put him at risk?"

"The 'good fight?'"

"You know Buffy/Angel saving lives, friends, family, catching the bad guys, saving the world, the good fight."

"Buffy…as in the vampire Slayer?"

"Wow, you heard of them?"

"Of course I have, I was actually a teen when they came out. You would have been what ten?"

"Hey now!!," feeling mildly offended. "You're so old you probably saw the movie in the theater."

"Hey." It was Lex's turn to look offended and I had the insight to look apologetic as he stared at me evilly. Of course a smirk appeared on my face all too quickly negating any headway I had with my false sorry eyes.

"OK, you Joss wanna be. Explain your logic. I'm assuming Clark is Buffy right?"

"In every generation there is one girl in all the world….and I am honored to just be a Scooby." I say 'the world' with a mock bow of servitude that I'm sure Lex is used to seeing.

"So you're a Scooby?"

"Of course I'm Willow," I beamed with pride.

"So you're gay." Again with the sweet smile and dancing eyes. Damn him.

"Hey bi thank you," joining him when he finally laughed. "Seriously. I'm the information gatherer. I'm the one who made your wife. Clark had the hunch, but I had the facts." 'Oops,' I cursed myself. I saw pain flit across his features and I almost told him how sorry I was. But something stopped me. Something that knew he would resent the show of weakness so I just carried on as if I didn't notice. "Pete would be Xander and Lana would be the great Cordelia only actually perfect instead of just prom queen and a lot less bitchy. Mr. Kent would be like Giles, the watcher. Always teaching responsibility."

"Ah, with great power comes great responsibility," Lex commented with supposed authority.

I couldn't help but want to knock him down a notch. "Mixing comics Lex. Buffy's owned by WB which has it's hand in DC comics. You're talking in Marvel Spiderman and X-men stuff."

"How silly of me, continue." He seemed to have that how can you know that junk look, but hey I was glad to be a geek at the moment.

"Well, Mrs. Kent is like Joyce. Teaching him to follow his heart and how to love. So what do you think?"

"Are you leaving me out on purpose or saving the best for last?"

"I was hoping you wouldn't catch that but OK. Well, you are a toss up. Either Angel or Spike. I haven't really decided."

"You mean you've actually thought about this?" he seemed shocked.

Did he think I was making it up as I went along?

"Everything I've ever needed to know I've learned from Buffy. Drugs bad. Sex VERY BAD. Beer bad. Frat parties VERY, VERY BAD. When you're young the world is black and white, but as you get older you learn all about the shades of gray. You have to think before you fight for something and if nothing else, research, research, research. And you are a toss up."

"OK explain both and I'll help you decide."

"Take Angel. He did something really bad and was punished for it. He was given a soul. You were punished for doing something really bad and given Clark to act as your soul. You both are close even though everyone thinks that at any minute you'll hurt him in some form or another. And let's face it one moment of perfect happiness," with a snap of my fingers, "and you lose your soul."

"Gee thanks," he looked a little crushed but not entirely hurting.

"Don't take it so hard. It's not like you desire your father's love so badly that you would turn on your only friend and destroy him to get that one moment of acceptance, right?"

Lex gulped, "I've given up on my father's love a long time ago. Turning on Clark would be pointless."

I just smile at the admission. It was one of my greatest fears and I'm glad to have spoken it out loud and even happier that Lex at least attempted to put my fear to rest. Also that he didn't cream me for being so personal.

"That leaves Spike. He is forced to behave by a chip. You now live in a microcosm where everyone will judge you if you speed and believe me they do. Spike is forced to do good in order to survive." Lex snorts at that but I didn't let that stop me. "You have to do good in order to be accepted. You both long for love from people who have abandon and abused you. You both want love and acceptance from the heroes of the story."

"Platonically right?" His eyebrow shot up awaiting my answer and I couldn't help but smile as I pondered my response.

"In your case, sure." He seemed relieved, can't have that. "Though some people are starting to wonder." He kicked me gently under the table "Hey now," I sputtered in complete disbelief. His eyes revealed nothing. Not even a glimpse of regret or impishness. "Well, anyway, Spike then goes off and gets a soul. The question remains; who is the more valuable character? The more honorable one? Angel who has spent a hundred years or so trying to make up for his past because of a soul he was 'forced' to have? Or Spike who chose to seek his out in the name of love? Who fought valiantly stood the trials and won his soul? So Lex, I guess the question is are you being forced to have a soul or are you trying to earn it?"

"Who would you rather have me be?"

"Spike, he's yummy." Again a thought that wasn't actually supposed to leave my mind. "I just mean," stuttering embarrassed a bit at his knowing smile. "If you could physically be James hey I'm all for that." Again he snorted. If he doesn't watch it, I might actually believe he has a sense of humor. "OK skipping the girl talk." Hoping he would stop looking at me like a cat to a canary.

"Thank you."

"The point is, this really isn't about what I want or believe. It's about who you really are or want to be. So you tell me who are you?"

Lex seemed to ponder the thought and looked as if he were about to answer when Clark appeared out of the blue.

"Chloe," he said rushing over, then he noticed I wasn't alone. Curiosity shown in his eyes, but his manners pushed it aside. "Lex hi." I cleared my throat with my hand out expectantly. He laid the disc in my palm and flushed a bit. "Chloe I'm really sorry about being late. I ah…"

"Don't worry about it. I just have to get back to school and edit this so I can get it out. This better not be crap Kent; I don't have time to come up with something else."

I got up and gave a silent nod to Lex he returned it with a soft smile. "Nice talking to you Ms. Sullivan."

"Back at ya."

As I'm leaving I hear Clark talking to Lex.

"So what was that all about?" Clark asked.

"Don't worry about it Slayer. Everyone's entitled to their secrets."

I couldn't stop the giggle that escaped as I walked out the door and I never giggle. I think to myself that maybe James Marsters isn't the only yummy guy I know.

~FIN~