Hello all! It's been way too long since I've written anything and I apologize for that. This story was easy to write, well okay the first chapter, but anyway. Tell me watcha think, as always. ;) (oh and am I the only one who is stupidly excited about the Christmas episode?" ah can't wait! ;)

It was a terrible morning to hear that annoying buzzing going off into my ear, or more into my entire being I should say. It had been a long night since the planning of the funeral and I couldn't get any sleep. The more I thought about it the more I started to cry. And sadly enough I only had one day left till I went back to work. This was going to kill me. My head started to pound from the tossing and turning that had made imprints on my sheets. I faintly heard my cell phone going off and at that moment it was the farthest thing from my mind. Who in their right mind would call me on such a dreadful day? I looked at the caller ID and my memory come splashing back at me like a wave. Roy. I had forgotten about our fight. I kicked him out and made him go to his brother, Kenny's house. Roy expected me to still be the same fix dinner and clean up the apartment Pam that was before this all happened. How could he be so insensitive and stupid? I shook my head, I didn't want to think about him right now, and in fact I almost never wanted to think about him again. Whoa calm down Pam, he's still your fiancé. I sat up slowly and saw some lightly colored Daises just to the right of me. I squinted and picked up the white card in front of them.

Pam, I'm so incredibly sorry about Penny. I'm always here for you, if you ever need anyone to talk to. Always, Jim.

I smiled at the moment I woke up to a delivery man, only a few days after her death. Jim, just like most everyone in the office, heard it from Roy, who seemed to be a chatterbox without a mute button. It was really sweet of Jim, not only to send me flowers, thankfully instead of the millions of casseroles that everyone else sent me, but to also remember her name. It seems ridiculous to have my heart turn because of something so simple, but it just makes me remember what an amazing friend Jim is.

I shake my head as I hear a car door slam. I slouch down on the couch expecting Roy to come through the door with another gift from anyone in the office. Instead I hear a light knocking. I groan and get up and see who dares to knock at my door. I am a complete wreck. I sigh and attempt to fix my hair.

I open the door and reveal a dark haired man in a black suit. "Can I help you?" my voice sounded like it's been trapped for days. "Yes, I'm looking for a Pamela Beesly?" "I'm her" I reply reluctantly.

"Hi, I'm Richard Garrison, I here because of your sister..." he looks down at his note pad. "Penny Beesly"

My eyes spin around in circles. What else could someone want to say about Penny? Can't anyone just leave me alone? I sigh and move over so he can enter. "Thank you" he replies. I nod in his direction as he passes. I follow him back towards our messy living room and sit down on the couch.

"So I realize that this is very painful for you, but there are some important matters to take care of." I nod almost angrily, just waiting for him to say one thing wrong so I can punch him in the face. "As you know, Penny has an 8 month old son…" I interrupt way loudly then I need too. "What?" "She has a son" he repeats almost confused by the words just spoken. "You know she has a son right?" this is it; this is the moment where I punch him in the face. I look around the room. Penny has a son? How could she not let anyone know this? Was she never going to tell me? Does mom even know? My head spins faster as thoughts rush in and out of my head. The silence must have been dragged on because soon his voice came full view. "Should I come back later?" his voice a side step away from a threat.

"No, just tell me why you're here" my voice wavering. "Well you are the last person that her son can go to. He has no father, and in the will, it says she wants him to go to you" I scoff in disbelief. She wants me to take her son, whom she never told me about. Real good Penny. I suddenly feel a little angry at her. "Now he will be here tomorrow, that is if you accept" "What if I don't?" I reply boldly. "Then he will go to a foster home." The words hit me like knives. I never want to do that to Penny, but at the same time how can I raise Penny's kid? What will Roy think? I sigh knowing that Roy isn't ready to raise a baby. Nor was I even feeling the nerve to raise one with him after last night. Seeing his true colors just makes me angry. "Do I have any time to think about this?" My voice completely needy. "Of course, here's my card." He hands me a navy blue imprinted business card. "Now, it would be great if you could call me before 5:00 tomorrow evening."

"Alright" is my only reply as he walks towards the door Sure, let me think if I wanna kid in twenty four hours. "Oh and Miss Beesly?" he calls turning around. "Yes?" I comeback completely drained of anything else he could possibly tell me. "His name is Benjamin Allan Beesly" he has a short smile as he leaves letting the door close with a soft click. That click pushed my mind in the last bit of reality there ever could be. I haven't even begun to think any of this through and Roy is not even home yet. A little while later I hear a loud car door slam. Now I know that's Roy. I hold the tears behind my eyelids as I hear the door open. "Hey" he says softly. The urge to talk to him is very limited. He looks at me with regret and I look away. I pause gently before I say anything, suddenly feeling the world pressing against me. I fight my urge to cry. I quickly stop him from his apologies.

"We have to talk Roy" I say finally my voice tearing into pieces. He comes and sits beside me. It's almost like a train wreck waiting to happen, as the words just sit on the tip of my lips waiting to jump off. My eyes suddenly build up with tears. My mind screams out for a hand to hold when I feel Roy's freezing one on top of mine. I pull away. I'm tired of pretending and right now I'm tired of living. Before I knew what was happening the sun was setting and my life was changing.

Thanks so much for reading! I hope you like it, just came to me while I was playing with my nieces. You know I love to hear from you guys so…..

Review! It could save a life! :D

-jamfan2000-