This is an Olicity story

Hope you'll like it.

I still do not own Arrow. :(

IF ONLY

Felicity's POV

I woke up startled and immediately looked around at my surroundings. Realizing I was in my room, I relaxed a bit, took a deep breath and let it out slowly. I looked at the time; it was 1:20 AM. I listened to the sounds in my apartment, but I only heard the clock ticking and nothing else. It was dark in my room; I always liked sleeping in the dark but these last few nights, I was afraid to. But even when I was scared, I still turned the lights off before going to bed. These last few months, I felt really uncomfortable in my own bed and apartment. I don't know why, but I feel awfully restless. Waking up in the middle of the night, afraid of something that isn't there. I don't know what to do with myself, I really have no clue.

Not being able to sleep again, I did what I had done these last few weeks. I got out of bed, put my black boots on, wrapped a thick and warm coat around myself and walked out of my apartment. I walked through the hall, to the elevator, got off at the first floor and walked out the building. Wandering through the streets of my city, having no destination. I just walked and walked till I was tired, then I went back home. If you saw me like that, you'd probably think I'm crazy or troubled.

And you would be right, because I am troubled. But the thing is, I don't know why I am this restless. I have everything a 25 year old woman would want; I have a job I love, a nice apartment, friends and parents who love me, a boyfriend who's crazy about me. My life is complete and perfect. So I should be happy, yet I feel the opposite of that.

There is an emptiness inside my heart that cannot be explained. I hide these feelings from the world, because if they knew how I truly felt, they would say that I'm a very ungrateful person. So, I keep it all to myself. But this emptiness and restlessness was consuming me from the inside out. It was draining all of my energy.

My boyfriend Ben is an amazing guy, but I'm not in love with him anymore. Maybe I never was; maybe I was in love with the idea of him. Ben comes from a wealthy family, is very handsome and loves me very much. My friends say I'm very lucky to have him, but all I feel now is a deep friendship for him. Nothing more, nothing less. What makes matters worse is the fact that he always says that he will marry me some day. But I do not want to. These past days, I toss and turn in my bed, thinking of a way to break up with him.

But in every scenario I think of, Ben gets hurt, making me feel extremely guilty. So I postpone it every time I see him. When I wake up in the morning, I say to myself: 'Today I will do it'. But when he hugs me tightly and says that he loves me, those heart wrenching words refuse to leave my lips.

So here I am, still wandering the streets of my city without a destination. Just walking and walking like some nut. Then it happened! It happened so fast, that I froze at the spot. I was going to cross the street; the light was green. But I was in deep thought and didn't see a car driving through a red light! It was coming right at me, but I was too shocked to move. At that very moment, I saw flashes and images before my very eyes.

I stood in front of a huge house; you could call it a mansion though. It looked like it was build not long ago. I opened the front door that was made of thick glass. While standing on the threshold of the door, I saw my reflection in a mirror. I was wearing a white summer dress and wore my blonde hair down. Without hesitation I walked inside the mansion and gasped at how beautiful the living room was. Apart from the fire place, the interior was modern. There was a huge black couch in the middle of it and two tables made of glass. The walls were painted white, while the curtains were red and hung all the way down to the floor. It was a gorgeous living room with red, white and black colors. There were a lot of windows, so the sunlight lit up the room, giving it a special effect.

I stood still for a couple of moments, enjoying the view, but walked further to see the rest. There were no rooms on the first floor, so I assumed that they were on the second floor. But instead of walking up the stairs, I walked through a hall that ended up in the kitchen. It was also huge and modern. The dining room had a wooden table with 16 chairs, while the walls were painted red.

I walked further and opened the back door. The sun was shining; the warmth of it on my skin made me feel wonderful. I was amazed how beautiful the garden was. There were a lot of trees and the garden had a whole lot of flowers. All kinds of colors, shapes and sizes. I felt like I was in a fairy tale, almost feeling like a little girl again. Birds were singing and the wind was making the leaves of the trees go from left to right. I was smiling widely, closed my eyes and inhaled the fresh air. It was nothing like the air in Starling City...

I was startled by a noise behind me and turned around. As my eyes landed on this stranger, my breath caught in my throat. I was looking into the deepest, lightest blue eyes I had ever seen in my life… He looked so familiar, but I don't think I met him before. The handsome stranger walked towards me, a smile gracing his face, making my heart beat fast against my chest. When he finally stood in front of me, I heard him say.

"Do you love the house, sweetie?"

I was too shocked to answer and nodded. He smiled and whispered." Everything for you."

Then he cupped my face lightly and looked deep into my eyes. His fingers were so warm on my skin, making me sigh happily. But after mere moments, he pulled away.

A beautiful little blonde girl ran into his arms and said."Daddy, daddy. The house is beautiful!"

She then turned to look at me and greeted me with a heart melting smile on her face.

"What do you think of the house, mommy?" the gorgeous little girl asked.

But suddenly I was lying on the ground. In those moments that I was seeing those wonderful images, I felt two rough hands grab me by my shoulders and pulled me to the sidewalk! Instead of thanking this person, I wanted to curse at him/her for disturbing my moment. I got on my feet, planning to scold who ever saved my life. But when I saw who it was, my mouth almost dropped to the ground. I, Felicity Megan Smoak, was gazing into the deepest, lightest blue eyes I had ever seen in my life.

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