Disclaimer: Everything belongs to JMS, Babylonian Productions, Warner
Brothers, and everyone else who helped create Babylon 5. I don't own
anything.
A Favor for a Friend
Chapter One
"No!" Susan's scream echoed through medlab. She held Marcus's lifeless body in her arms, sobbing uncontrollably. Susan was so deeply buried in grief that she didn't hear Franklin run into medlab shouting her name. Seeing the scene ahead of him, the doctor stopped in his tracks.
"No. My God, no." Franklin's words were barely audible, but that didn't matter. He could have yelled and Susan still wouldn't have heard him. She was trapped in sorrow, reliving every moment she had ever spent with Marcus. Treasuring them, and yet hating them with a fervor that surprised even her. Marcus. Dead. That couldn't happen. It was impossible. As she relived their conversation about Marcus's "lover" on the White Star, she gasped. I never told him I loved him. I told him to go to hell, I laughed at his jokes, I trusted him as I haven't trusted anyone in a long time, but I never told him I loved him. It was that thought that caused her sobbing to increase until here entire body was shaking. He died thinking his love was unrequited. He died for me and I never told him how I really felt. I was afraid that I would only get hurt again. Well I got hurt, and it hurts more than anything else that's ever happened to me. It's my fault Marcus is lying dead in my arms while I'm still alive. I should have told him I loved him. Why don't you, a part of her asked, it couldn't hurt. "Marcus," her voice was barely a whisper, "I love you."
*********
"No," Marcus uttered almost involuntarily, "I never meant to do that to her. I wanted to help. I wanted to save her live. I never wanted her to fell this way. If I could only see her again. We could spend time together, and maybe, someday—"
"Good, I'm glad to see that you want a second chance. That will make matters much simpler." Sinclair stepped out of the shadows.
"Va-Va-Valen?" Marcus managed to get out.
"Yes, I offer you the chance to go back to your life. If you want it."
"Of course, but why?" Marcus was thrilled by the prospect of seeing Susan again, but it all seemed to easy.
"Because I owe her a favor." There was no need to say who "her" was.
"You, Valen, owe Susan a favor?" The name brought more tears to Marcus's already moist eyes.
"In a sense, I used to be the commander of Babylon 5, and then I was the ambassador—"
"How could I have been so stupid? I was there, you were there. You're Sinclair." Marcus felt his cheeks redden. He had known that, but his emotional state combined with Sinclair's bone had not allowed him to realize it until now. Valen/Sinclair nodded.
"Susan was my second on Babylon 5. She worked hard and always did her duty—and I never thanked her properly for it. It was awful for her to have no choice but to watch as I rode a thousand years back into the past…" Valen/Sinclair trailed off, as if experiencing this moment again for another time.
"She's suffered so much loss in her life," he continued. "It's time she gets something back in return."
"What exactly do I have to do?"
"Nothing, except want to. Just close your eyes and want it with all of your heart."
"Thank you. I won't screw this up."
"Good, because I can't give you a third chance." Marcus closed his eyes and thought of Susan. Of his first conversation with her. The time when he told Franklin how he felt…. Their conversations on the White Star…. Every moment he had ever spent with her. Except his death, he refused to relive that.
********
Susan buried her head in Marcus's shoulder and continued sobbing. Franklin had left the room, and he and Zack Allan were watching her over a camera in Medlab to make sure she didn't try anything stupid.
"I can't believe he did this," Franklin remarked. "He must have really loved her." Zack nodded and leaned in to look at the screen.
"Oh my God." Zack was clearly awed.
"What? What is it?" The doctor's first thought was that Susan was attempting suicide. "His arm just moved."
********
"Susan." His voice was so familiar that she thought she only imagined it.
"Susan, I'm back." She still didn't believe that she'd hear it.
"Great. Not only does the bastard die, he's going to torment me with his voice for the rest of my life."
"And mine." Susan heard him loud and clear this time and sat up with a jolt.
"Ma-Marcus?" she asked, her voice wavering.
"The one and only," he replied with a grin.
"Wait a minute. You died. You gave your life force to me. Right?" Marcus nodded. "And now you're back like you just took a trip to Mars or something. What the hell is going on?" To the commander's annoyance, Marcus started chuckling.
"What?"
"I finally did something that you can't explain away. It's rather funny seeing you without a quick comeback." Yes, this was definitely Marcus. Only he could treat coming back from the dead as such an everyday thing.
"You—" she began and realized he was right. "Marcus, I'm very glad you're back, but would you mind telling me how the hell you did it?"
"And us." The two looked up. Delenn, Sheridan, Lyta, Zack, and Franklin were standing in the doorway.
"We decided to protect you from dying again, Marcus. We thought she'd kill you for killing yourself." The Captain didn't find the whole situation as odd as the others did. Maybe it was because he had been brought back from the dead twice himself.
"It's a rather strange story, actually…." Marcus told them about his encounter with Valen/Sinclair.
"Valen—I mean, Sinclair, whatever—did this for me?" The idea that someone would die for her was strange enough, but the idea that a God, even one who had been a friend, would bring a person back to life for her…. Marcus nodded.
"He said you had some unfinished business with me." Susan felt her cheeks flush and looked to Delenn for rescue. She saw only the Ambassador's back as she left the room with the others. Realizing that her only options were to continue the conversation or leave, Susan chose the former. She nodded as she stood up and sat on the bed behind her. Marcus did the same, very close to her. A year ago she would have felt uncomfortable, but now it felt good to have him so close—and alive again. So close, she thought. I came so close to losing him forever…so why is it just as hard to tell him how I feel?
Sensing her thought, Marcus spoke. "I know this must be difficult, Susan. If you want to wait until you've had more time—"
Susan found her voice again. "Damn it, Marcus. I did that once; I won't do it again." She took a deep breath. "When you," her voice became hoarse, "when you sacrificed your life for me, I realized that I had known who you were talking about on the White Star, I just hadn't admitted it to myself. I couldn't. I was too scared of losing you. I was so damn scared that I ignored you. I told you to go to hell twice as often as I praised you. I was a jerk."
"Susan." Marcus didn't like seeing her tear herself up like this.
"I mean it, Marcus. I took the easy way out before. I won't make that mistake again." She paused and looked at him. "I love you, Marcus," she confessed, her voice a whisper. Marcus couldn't believe he had actually heard that, it was something he had dreamed of for so long. This is your big chance, he thought, don't screw it up.
"You don't deserve all the blame, Susan. I never told you, either."
"Yeah, but any fool could have figured out what you were implying."
"Well, you're not exactly a fool, are you?" Marcus asked, putting an arm around her and pulling her toward him. Susan hadn't been expecting this and fell across his lap.
"You are a dead man." She gazed up into his eyes and all the reprimand drained from her voice. He had been one so recently. "No, I didn't mean that." Marcus sensed that if this line of conversation were allowed to continue, they would both become depressed, so he decided to take a chance.
"But I mean this," he told her, and leaned down to kiss her. Valen, what if she slaps me? She didn't.
I ignored him once, not this time, Susan. And you just might enjoy yourself. To his surprise, she kissed him back. Marcus was the one who broke off the kiss.
"I've wanted to do that for so long," he confessed. "I even thought about doing it on the White Star, the war room, C&C, the hallways—" Susan was laughing now.
"I get the picture, Marcus…. And, believe it or not, I thought about doing the same thing. But I was too damn scared."
"So, was it worth putting your fear aside?"
"You really are new at this, aren't you?" She laughed again.
"Well?"
"Does this answer your question?" she asked, and kissed him.
A Favor for a Friend
Chapter One
"No!" Susan's scream echoed through medlab. She held Marcus's lifeless body in her arms, sobbing uncontrollably. Susan was so deeply buried in grief that she didn't hear Franklin run into medlab shouting her name. Seeing the scene ahead of him, the doctor stopped in his tracks.
"No. My God, no." Franklin's words were barely audible, but that didn't matter. He could have yelled and Susan still wouldn't have heard him. She was trapped in sorrow, reliving every moment she had ever spent with Marcus. Treasuring them, and yet hating them with a fervor that surprised even her. Marcus. Dead. That couldn't happen. It was impossible. As she relived their conversation about Marcus's "lover" on the White Star, she gasped. I never told him I loved him. I told him to go to hell, I laughed at his jokes, I trusted him as I haven't trusted anyone in a long time, but I never told him I loved him. It was that thought that caused her sobbing to increase until here entire body was shaking. He died thinking his love was unrequited. He died for me and I never told him how I really felt. I was afraid that I would only get hurt again. Well I got hurt, and it hurts more than anything else that's ever happened to me. It's my fault Marcus is lying dead in my arms while I'm still alive. I should have told him I loved him. Why don't you, a part of her asked, it couldn't hurt. "Marcus," her voice was barely a whisper, "I love you."
*********
"No," Marcus uttered almost involuntarily, "I never meant to do that to her. I wanted to help. I wanted to save her live. I never wanted her to fell this way. If I could only see her again. We could spend time together, and maybe, someday—"
"Good, I'm glad to see that you want a second chance. That will make matters much simpler." Sinclair stepped out of the shadows.
"Va-Va-Valen?" Marcus managed to get out.
"Yes, I offer you the chance to go back to your life. If you want it."
"Of course, but why?" Marcus was thrilled by the prospect of seeing Susan again, but it all seemed to easy.
"Because I owe her a favor." There was no need to say who "her" was.
"You, Valen, owe Susan a favor?" The name brought more tears to Marcus's already moist eyes.
"In a sense, I used to be the commander of Babylon 5, and then I was the ambassador—"
"How could I have been so stupid? I was there, you were there. You're Sinclair." Marcus felt his cheeks redden. He had known that, but his emotional state combined with Sinclair's bone had not allowed him to realize it until now. Valen/Sinclair nodded.
"Susan was my second on Babylon 5. She worked hard and always did her duty—and I never thanked her properly for it. It was awful for her to have no choice but to watch as I rode a thousand years back into the past…" Valen/Sinclair trailed off, as if experiencing this moment again for another time.
"She's suffered so much loss in her life," he continued. "It's time she gets something back in return."
"What exactly do I have to do?"
"Nothing, except want to. Just close your eyes and want it with all of your heart."
"Thank you. I won't screw this up."
"Good, because I can't give you a third chance." Marcus closed his eyes and thought of Susan. Of his first conversation with her. The time when he told Franklin how he felt…. Their conversations on the White Star…. Every moment he had ever spent with her. Except his death, he refused to relive that.
********
Susan buried her head in Marcus's shoulder and continued sobbing. Franklin had left the room, and he and Zack Allan were watching her over a camera in Medlab to make sure she didn't try anything stupid.
"I can't believe he did this," Franklin remarked. "He must have really loved her." Zack nodded and leaned in to look at the screen.
"Oh my God." Zack was clearly awed.
"What? What is it?" The doctor's first thought was that Susan was attempting suicide. "His arm just moved."
********
"Susan." His voice was so familiar that she thought she only imagined it.
"Susan, I'm back." She still didn't believe that she'd hear it.
"Great. Not only does the bastard die, he's going to torment me with his voice for the rest of my life."
"And mine." Susan heard him loud and clear this time and sat up with a jolt.
"Ma-Marcus?" she asked, her voice wavering.
"The one and only," he replied with a grin.
"Wait a minute. You died. You gave your life force to me. Right?" Marcus nodded. "And now you're back like you just took a trip to Mars or something. What the hell is going on?" To the commander's annoyance, Marcus started chuckling.
"What?"
"I finally did something that you can't explain away. It's rather funny seeing you without a quick comeback." Yes, this was definitely Marcus. Only he could treat coming back from the dead as such an everyday thing.
"You—" she began and realized he was right. "Marcus, I'm very glad you're back, but would you mind telling me how the hell you did it?"
"And us." The two looked up. Delenn, Sheridan, Lyta, Zack, and Franklin were standing in the doorway.
"We decided to protect you from dying again, Marcus. We thought she'd kill you for killing yourself." The Captain didn't find the whole situation as odd as the others did. Maybe it was because he had been brought back from the dead twice himself.
"It's a rather strange story, actually…." Marcus told them about his encounter with Valen/Sinclair.
"Valen—I mean, Sinclair, whatever—did this for me?" The idea that someone would die for her was strange enough, but the idea that a God, even one who had been a friend, would bring a person back to life for her…. Marcus nodded.
"He said you had some unfinished business with me." Susan felt her cheeks flush and looked to Delenn for rescue. She saw only the Ambassador's back as she left the room with the others. Realizing that her only options were to continue the conversation or leave, Susan chose the former. She nodded as she stood up and sat on the bed behind her. Marcus did the same, very close to her. A year ago she would have felt uncomfortable, but now it felt good to have him so close—and alive again. So close, she thought. I came so close to losing him forever…so why is it just as hard to tell him how I feel?
Sensing her thought, Marcus spoke. "I know this must be difficult, Susan. If you want to wait until you've had more time—"
Susan found her voice again. "Damn it, Marcus. I did that once; I won't do it again." She took a deep breath. "When you," her voice became hoarse, "when you sacrificed your life for me, I realized that I had known who you were talking about on the White Star, I just hadn't admitted it to myself. I couldn't. I was too scared of losing you. I was so damn scared that I ignored you. I told you to go to hell twice as often as I praised you. I was a jerk."
"Susan." Marcus didn't like seeing her tear herself up like this.
"I mean it, Marcus. I took the easy way out before. I won't make that mistake again." She paused and looked at him. "I love you, Marcus," she confessed, her voice a whisper. Marcus couldn't believe he had actually heard that, it was something he had dreamed of for so long. This is your big chance, he thought, don't screw it up.
"You don't deserve all the blame, Susan. I never told you, either."
"Yeah, but any fool could have figured out what you were implying."
"Well, you're not exactly a fool, are you?" Marcus asked, putting an arm around her and pulling her toward him. Susan hadn't been expecting this and fell across his lap.
"You are a dead man." She gazed up into his eyes and all the reprimand drained from her voice. He had been one so recently. "No, I didn't mean that." Marcus sensed that if this line of conversation were allowed to continue, they would both become depressed, so he decided to take a chance.
"But I mean this," he told her, and leaned down to kiss her. Valen, what if she slaps me? She didn't.
I ignored him once, not this time, Susan. And you just might enjoy yourself. To his surprise, she kissed him back. Marcus was the one who broke off the kiss.
"I've wanted to do that for so long," he confessed. "I even thought about doing it on the White Star, the war room, C&C, the hallways—" Susan was laughing now.
"I get the picture, Marcus…. And, believe it or not, I thought about doing the same thing. But I was too damn scared."
"So, was it worth putting your fear aside?"
"You really are new at this, aren't you?" She laughed again.
"Well?"
"Does this answer your question?" she asked, and kissed him.