Not Married Yet

Chapter 1- Not Married Yet

"I have an announcement to make." The room got quiet as Sirius stood and spoke these words. He looked lovingly at the woman sitting beside him and announced, "Fiona and I are getting married!"

Cries of congratulations could be heard all around the room, but my voice did not join them. I felt as though it were ice coursing through my veins rather than the blood I knew to be there. This was the worst day of my life for I am not Fiona. No, I am merely Hermione Granger the very-good-friend-of-but not-good-enough-to-be-interested-in friend of Sirius Black.

I could see Harry out of the corner of my eye give me a concerned look before standing to go congratulate his godfather. I ignored him as I stared moodily at the table. Harry knew that I was in love with Sirius. He knew because he knows me. Far too well for my liking in this particular situation. I closed my eyes for a brief moment, took a deep breath, and followed Harry's lead. Before I got too far however, a hand grabbed my arm causing me to spin on the spot and face the one who grabbed me.

"Are you okay, Hermione?" It was Ginny and her voice was filled to the brim with concern. She knew that I loved Sirius because Harry knew. Harry was never very good at keeping things from Ginny. I can't really talk, however, because I'm not very good at keeping things from her either.

"Oh, I'm just dandy. Never better actually," I said with a smile that Ginny did not believe for a moment. She said nothing but let go of my arm, shaking her head. Looking for an excuse to be a good distance from Sirius at the moment, I decided maybe it wasn't a bad idea to vent everything by talking to Ginny.

"Okay, so I'm not okay. But did you really expect me to be? The man I love is getting married and it isn't to me and now I'm about to walk up to him and congratulate him when I would much rather cut my tongue out. I'm not okay. But I will be. This is obviously something I'll just have to get over. It was one thing to push things a little when he had a girlfriend, but now he's going to get married and even I have the decency to back off. He's officially taken, I'm officially done."

Ginny looked shocked that these words just came out of my mouth. She seemed to shake herself of this look and instead place a smile on her face. "I'm proud of you, Hermione, but he's not married yet."

I copied the shocked look that Ginny had just given me a moment ago. "What are you saying, Gin? I should still go after this? Honestly, I love the way you think, but I can't do that Ginny. Please, I don't want to hurt anymore." I could feel tears prickling into my eyes and was surprised by them. Ginny noticed them too and give me a sympathetic look before moving in to hug me. All this did was make the tears that cropped up so easily in my eyes run down my face.

Ginny pulled away and said, "You go on upstairs. I'll tell him you weren't feeling well and went to lie down."

"Thanks, Gin. You're the best," I said speaking truly and gratefully.

I moved my way out of the crowded room trying to keep my face hidden. When the noise of the party became inaudible, I was almost to the stairs. I was spending the Christmas holiday's with the Weasley's and tonight was Christmas Eve. After the war, the Weasley family was declared heroes for aiding so much in the war against Voldemort. They could afford almost anything now, but they didn't let the money go to their heads. The bought a larger home, but not an unreasonably large one. They often gave money to charities and to those poorer than themselves. They were doing quite well now.

I opened the door to the guest room to which I was staying in, took off my shoes, and laid down on the bed. I stared at the ceiling, lost in thought. One thought in particular kept popping up. How could this have happened? Sometime later, I heard a soft knock on my door. I sat up and told whoever it was to come in. I was expecting Ginny or Harry, but it was Sirius who walked through my door. I wanted to dramatically lie back down and groan at the unfairness of the situation, but I behaved myself and smiled at him instead.

"Hi Sirius! Congratulations!" I said as happily as I could muster.

He smiled a gorgeous smile at me and said, "Thanks, Hermione! Is it all right if I sit down?"

"Sure," I said still smiling and curled my legs to the side so that he could sit at the end of the bed. He sat down closer to me than I expected and my heart skipped a beat. I silently scolded myself for still thinking about him like this. Sirius wasn't saying anything so I wondered what I would say to him right now if I wasn't madly in love with him. I opened my mouth to ask him how it felt to be a taken man in the most excited, teasing, good-for-you way I could muster, but, at the same moment, Sirius decided to speak as well.

"Hermione, you know you're my best friend." He looked at me as to confirm this. I wondered what in the world was going to come next.

"Yes, of course. You're my best friend as well."

He stared deep into my eyes for a moment and then looked away, mouth hanging open as if he couldn't decide how to say what he wanted to say.

"What is it, Sirius?" I urged him.

He looked at me square in the eyes and said, "Hermione, I think I love you," and without hesitation he moved forward and gently placed his lips against mine. The kiss surprised me, but I closed my eyes and focused on the softness of his lips. This must be heaven.

I heard a loud knocking and then someone calling my name. I opened my eyes was surprised to be looking at the ceiling instead of Sirius. I sat up and saw Ginny standing in the doorway looking at me strangely. I touched my hand to my lips and looked around before mentally scolding myself.

"Damn it!" I cried. Ginny came to sit by me. I pulled my legs up and hugged them, burying my face in my arms.

"What's the matter, Hermione?" Ginny asked soothingly.

"I had a dream about him," I spoke in an annoyed tone to my legs.

"Want to talk about it?" I sighed deeply and raised my head to rest it on my arms. Not looking at her, I explained the dream.

"It felt so real too; I could feel the softness of his lips and a tingle spread through my body," I finished. Sighing again, I looked at Ginny, "How long was I out anyway?"

"A little over an hour," she shrugged. "Almost everyone is gone now. Fiona went home. She said she was feeling tired."

"What about him? Is he still around?" I asked trying not to sound too hopeful that the man of my dreams, quite literally now, was still here without the woman of his. When will I get it through my head that I can't have him?

"He's downstairs playing chess with Ron."

"And losing?" I added feeling the corners of my lips turn up to form a small smile.

Ginny grinned, "Of course." After a moment, her grin faded and she adopted a concerned look instead. "Come downstairs? Mum's baked cookies. I know they're your favorites," she said hopefully and I knew that she really wanted me to come down with her.

"Fine," I smiled and rolled my eyes. "But only for the cookies… mostly."

"Yay!" she exclaimed and hugged me tightly. She then grabbed my hand and pulled me up, out of the room and then down the stairs. We made our way to the large living room area where Sirius and Ron were playing their game of chess. Harry sat close by watching intently. I smelled the plate of cookies before I spotted them sitting on a table within arms reach of the boys. I was surprised there was any left by this point. A large, heavily decorated Christmas tree was in the corner of the room and the smell of pine needles filled the room mixing with the smell of fresh made cookies. Since Harry was so absorbed in the game of chess being played in front of him and Ron had his back towards us, it was Sirius who first noticed our entrance. Upon seeing us, he smiled brightly.

"Hey Hermione, are you feeling any better?" I saw Harry look up at Sirius' greeting and I could see his expression go from concern to a small smile. Ron made an amazing move against Sirius while he was distracted, and then turned to face us, offering a smile as a greeting.

"Yes, much better, thanks." I could feel my cheeks heating up as I thought about the recent dream I had about Sirius. I hope that it wouldn't cause me to act strangely around him. Dreams make you do strange things sometimes even though you know that what happened wasn't real. It's almost as if you're afraid that somehow the other person knows you dreamt about them. I rubbed my checks as if this would help make the redness go away, but hopefully this also served to cover them so no one would notice.

"Pull up some chairs, ladies. You're missing an exciting game," Sirius smiled. I glanced at Harry who was attempting to hold back his laughter.

"Yeah, one that you're losing spectacularly," Harry said seemingly unable to contain himself. We all laughed and as Ginny and I were pulling chairs over, Sirius reached over and pushed Harry off of his chair.

"Ow," Harry said getting up and rubbing his shoulder which he must have fallen on. "What was that for?" Ginny put her chair next to Harry's and I on the other side of the table.

"For being a bad godson," Sirius said smirking with satisfaction at what he had just done. Harry was still rubbing his shoulder and Ginny laughed at him.

"Oh, you're fine," she smiled brightly. Harry looked at her and I could see a glint in his eyes. I knew what was about to come. Harry reached over and pushed Ginny off of her own chair. She flailed her arms around for a moment before losing her balance and falling to the floor with a thud.

"Watch the chessboard!" Ron said not taking his eyes off of it.

"Hey!" Ginny said getting up off the floor. "What was that for?"

"For being a bad girlfriend," Harry said grinning. I knew instantly that this was a mistake. Ginny put her hands on her hips and looked dangerously at Harry. He realized it was a mistake as well as he added hopefully, yet somewhat fearfully, "Love you?"

"Yeah, come here and let me give you a little 'love' tap," Ginny said making her way towards Harry. He let out a yelp and got up to run away from her. She chased after him and they ran into the dining room. I just chuckled and shook my head. To be perfectly honest, I was quite jealous of them. They had each other. They have love. What more could anyone want? I looked over at Sirius who was smiling at them as well. Perhaps he was just thinking of Fiona, his own love. I certainly couldn't tell which.

The boys finished their chess game, to which Ron won of course, and Ron stretched while announcing that he was going to go to bed. I assumed that Harry and Ginny weren't coming back since it had been at least ten minutes since they disappeared. Since I had just been sleeping for an hour, I wasn't quite ready to go to bed myself yet. It hit me then that I still hadn't wished Sirius congratulations on his engagement. I resisted the urge to slap my forehead for being so stupid.

"Sirius!" I said breaking the silence that had filled the room once Ron had left. He looked startled at my sudden outburst. "I'm so stupid, I completely forgot that I owe you congratulations!"

"Oh," he sounded surprised, "first of all, you're not stupid. But thank you," he said grinning. It was so obvious that he was in love. Too bad it wasn't with me. I sighed loudly, annoyed at myself for thinking such thoughts. "What's the matter," he asked suddenly sounding concerned. I hadn't intended on making the sigh audible.

"Nothing," I replied quickly; probably too quickly. "Nothing," I repeated after taking a breath. I looked at Sirius and saw that he cocked his head to the side as if not believing that for a second. I dropped my gaze and shook my head. I wasn't about to delve into what was really wrong. How could I possibly tell him that I loved him and it wasn't likely for that feeling to go away even though he was going to be getting married?

"It's just that it seems like everyone's got someone, you know?" I still didn't meet his eyes. It wasn't that I didn't want to, I just couldn't. I was slightly surprised at myself for even revealing this much and I knew that if I looked into his eyes, I would find pity. Perhaps if I looked deep enough, I would be able to see love as well, but not the love for me. I heard the sound of his chair scraping against the ground as he pulled his own chair next to mine. I felt his hand on my shoulder and decided that this action was not helping my mind to forget my love for this man.

"Aw, come on. You'll find someone, I know you will. Hey," I felt his hand leave my shoulder and then felt his soft fingers under my chin instead. His touch sent a tingle through my body. He gently forced my head up so that I was looking at him. "You're smart, funny, amazingly beautiful, and any guy would be blind not to see it. Maybe he's right in front of you and you don't even realize it," Sirius said speaking softly and smiling slightly. Surely he meant generally, not literally at the moment. He took his hand away, but I still looked into his grey eyes, searching intently for any signs that he wasn't being truthful. I found none, but felt compelled to question him anyway.

"Sirius," I whispered, "you can't mean that. We are still talking about me here, aren't we?" He jokingly looked around, searching for who else he might be talking about. His action caused me to giggle softly. He looked back at me and smiled, but I shook my head. "I bet Fiona wouldn't like to hear you say that," I said looking away from him, but pleased with myself for keeping the jealousy out of my voice. I saw him wave the thought away.

"She knows that you and I are best friends. I'm sure you think that I'm charming, humorous, and very handsome," he said puffing his chest out slightly. It took all my effort to not look into his eyes and tell him that I do think that. Instead, I just laughed at him.

"Don't forget modest too," I added grinning.

"Very modest," he agreed, grinning as well. After a moment, he asked, "Want some tea?"

I was surprised by the question, but since I didn't feel like going to bed yet, having some tea with Sirius wouldn't be the worst way to spend Christmas Eve. "Sure," I told him, "I'd love some." He smiled and said he'd be right back, then headed in the direction of the kitchen.

Once he left, I stood up, stretched a little, and then took the plate of cookies over to the couch near the fireplace that currently contained a blazing fire. I picked up a cookie and was surprised, but pleased to find that it was still warm. I ate it slowly as I stared into the flames, completely lost in thought. What was I doing? Every time I'm away from Sirius, I tell myself that I have to give him up. Not that I ever had him, but give up my love for him. Yet whenever I am around him, I only want to spend more time with him. Well, I suppose there's nothing wrong with that. We're best friends, he said so himself. I smiled softly at the thought. He also said that I was beautiful, but he must have just said that to cheer me up. Even so, it was nice to hear.

"Thinking about something good?" I jumped slightly at hearing Sirius' voice next to me. He was sitting with me on the couch holding two cups of tea, just looking at me. I hadn't even noticed he'd come back.

"You could say that," I said taking one of the mugs he offered.

"Want to share with the class?" he asked jokingly. I smiled, but was silent for a moment. I tried not to get too absorbed in my thoughts.

"Thank you for cheering me up, Sirius," I said staring at the dancing flames.

"I'm glad I could make you feel better. I'm sure you would do the same for me," he spoke softly. I shivered slightly at his words. I hated that he had such effects on me. I was glad that he didn't seem to notice. We fell into a comfortable silence and soon only the sounds of the crackling fire and the occasional sip of tea could be heard.

"Hermione?" Sirius spoke some time later. His voice was hesitant. "Can I tell you something?"

"Anything," I heard myself say. This moment didn't feel real and I wondered if I was just dreaming again. A crazed thought of pinching myself cropped up in my mind, but I immediately dismissed it and turned my attention to Sirius.

He stared at the ground for a few moments, then sighed and said, "You're a good friend, Hermione." I was sure this wasn't what he originally wanted to say, but I let it be. I didn't want to make him tell me anything he didn't want to. Though that did nothing to stop me from wondering what he decided not to mention to me.

"So are you," I said softly. I heard him murmur his thanks. I set my empty mug next to the now empty plate that once held the cookies and could feel myself starting to drift off into slumber. I thought that I really should go back to my room, but I was too comfortable to move. I was warm by the fire and Sirius' presence was comforting.

I felt someone laying me down and realized that someone must have just carried me back to my room. I shivered from being away from the fire and whoever had just carried me here was now pulling a warm blanket over me. I could sense that the person was standing nearby, not having left yet. They must not realize I'm awake. I could feel the person getting closer to me. I felt myself pushing further into the mattress, uncomfortable with the amount of distance between me and this person. I wanted desperately to open my eyes, but I didn't want to startle the person.

"Merry Christmas, Hermione," Sirius whispered then placed his lips gently on my forehead. My heart skipped a beat and warmth spread throughout my body. He pulled away and I soon heard his retreating footsteps and the noise of my door quietly closing. I put my hand to the spot on my forehead where Sirius had just kissed and felt that it was still moist from his lips. I almost squealed in delight.

The last thing that I could remember thinking before giving back in to the sleep that was nagging at me was Ginny's voice saying "...but he's not married yet."

AN: Yes, the story title is the same as the chapter title in this case. Anyway, hi! Thanks for reading the first chapter of this story. I have the story mostly written already so there will be daily updates. I still appreciate any feedback even though the story is almost completely written. Thanks again for reading. Next chapter will be up tomorrow night.

PadfootBlack4Ever