A/N: Jah….this isn't something that isn't particularly plot heavy like the other Gravity Falls fanfic I'm working on. I just wanna take a break from planning and mapping out chapters. (and have an excuse to not do homework haha ohpleasesomeoneshootme - ahem)

Summary: Apparently Bill Cipher is bound to the soul of Pine Tree. Wonderful. An ancient demon of his caliber, stuck sharing a body with an adolescent, awkward teenage boy. For the meantime, Bill might as well take his time to enjoy what the third dimension had to offer, probably boring and uninspired stuff… "What are these...Do-ri-tos?"

Setting: Post Sock-Opera

Rated K+: For Mild Swearing, Mild Violence

Genre: Humor, Supernatural, Friendship, Family

~The Chapter In Which Bill Makes a New Enemy~

It is horribly freaky watching his own body erratically stumble back and forth, like a puppet being clumsily controlled by a three year old. To add on more to Dipper's panic, the fact that he is now in the black and white distorted scenery of the Mindscape didn't help his case at all.

Mabel gapes at her twin brother's body awkwardly stumble up to its feet, and gasps when the possessed body turns to her. A sickly, unnatural grin that Dipper would never make, is spread on his face, his eyes having a sick yellowish tint to them and pupils dialated. At that moment, the twins can both guess what phenomenon is just taking place in their very bedroom - the dreaded demon, Bill Cipher, has taken over Dipper Pine's body once again. Not good. Dipper can only float helplessly to the side, as he watches in horror Bill rising in his husk of a body. Bill blinks, and for a barest moment, confusion contorts his face.

Before he could take any more action, Mabel tackles the possessed Dipper's body. "Get outta my brother's body, you jerk-wad!" She hollers, turning red at the cheeks as she repeatedly smacks Bill's (technically, his face, Dipper remembers this fact in discomfort) face silly.

"Oof! Ah! Shooting - OUCH - Star, I can explain! YAWW!"

Quickly, Dipper scours the room for some sort of object he can take control of in order to be present in this chaotic situation. His eyes spot a lone sock lying on his messy, unmade bed. Dipper directs himself to float over to it, taking hold of the sock. In his ghostly form, he did his best to make a shape of a (very ugly) looking sock pocket, without the googly eyes and handmade costume. "Mabel! Let him talk! And please stop beating up my body, I'm going to have to get back into it eventually!"

Mabel stops in mid-punch, looking surprised at the floating, talking sock. "Bro!" She scowls violently at her possessed brother, who is shuddering under her intimidating presence. "What the heck is going on here? I thought we blew Bill into next week in the Opera last night!"

"I thought so too! You better explain Bill or - or -"

"Or we'll make you watch 4 hours worth of My Little Sparkly Dragon!" Mabel threatens with crazed eyes.

Dipper manages to give his sister the most weirded out look he could muster by possessing the makeshift sock body. Along with Bill, who gives Mabel a weird look as well. "Wait, what's My Little Sparkly -"

"Hey Dipper, we should play Good Cop, Bad Cop! You be the Good Cop! And I," Mabel takes a moment to crack her knuckles, glaring menacingly down at Bill who is pinned down to the floor. "Play the Bad Cop." Bill gives a loud gulp when he hears this.

"Mabel! Now's not the time for games! We gotta figure out what's happening here!"

"Aw, fine. Ruin my game, see if I care." She grumbles.

"Look kids, I'm just about as confused as you are. So hows' about you let me go and I'll just be on my merry way -"

"How about NO!" Mabel hollers, slamming Bill to the floor with the upmost strength. Dipper winces to himself, shuddering at the thoughts of the bruises awaiting him when he returns to his body. Bill flinches under the seemingly incredible strength of Mabel, raising his arms in surrender.

"I...I think there maybe some...complications."

"Care to elaborate?"

"Wellllll, something may or may have not happened when I took control of Pine Tree's body."

"And what is that 'happening' you speak of?" Dipper asks, suspicion growing in the air.

"Welllll, there's a reason why I don't like possessing human bodies so much."

"And?"

"Wellll, it's because there's a 50/50 percent chance that I might end up getting bound to the soul of the body."

"What?!" Dipper panics, flinging his ghostly arms around. Along with it, the sock in his hand waves up and down as well. Mabel couldn't help but laugh at this sight, though her face snaps back into somberness once she remembers the direness of the situation. "What the heck does that mean? Is this forever?!"

"Welllll -"

"Stop saying 'welllll' that's annoying!" Mabel interrupts, an impatient look on her round face.

"Gee, okay then! I'm hoping this won't be forever - though it may be a looooong time before my connection with your soul wears off. Who knows - it might take days, or weeks, or months, or years, or decades, or centuries, or, or - uhm, what's the word that's bigger than a century again? C'mon, help me out ki - OOF!" Bill exclaims, being smacked upside on the head by Mabel.

"This is bad. This is bad. This is bad, bad, bad!" Dipper repeats to himself, in a frenzied panic.

"Yeah, this is BAD! Trapped in a pre-teen boy's body - the hormones! The puberty! The adolescence -!"

"Woah, woah, too much information!" Mabel exclaims, her nose wrinkling in disgust.

"Does that mean I'm trapped in the Mindscape, forever?!" He shouts at Bill, nervously glancing over his shoulder at the scenery of the Mindscape. He just noticed how temperatures changed from hot to cold in volatile patterns…

"I wouldn't call it that. This unfortunate outcome only forces us to temporarily share your body for who-knows-how-long? So if either of us die - which is most likely you - I'll die too!" Bill says the last part a bit too cheerfully. "So it's only appropiate that I take control of your body for awhile - hey, I guess in a way we're roommates! Not roommates -" A creepy too shark-like grin takes up the possessed face. "But SOUL mates! Ahahahahahaha, GET IT?! It's funny because it's a pun!"

"Boooo!" Mabel groans, shaking her head at the terrible joke.

"You! You taking control of my body?! That's the worst arrangement ever! If anything, it's more likely that both of us will die if you take control of my body!"

"Whatever gives you that idea?" Bill questions, frowning as if he is actually offended.

"For starters, you think pain is hilarious!" Dipper quotes, remembering Bill's abuse of his body from yesterday's events, with a shudder of fear.

"Ohhh yeah - it still is! See!" He then proceeds to bang his head - Dipper's head, repeatedly against the nearby bed, with an unrelenting force.

"Hey, stop that!" Dipper's twin cries out, managing to drag Bill away from the bed to stop him from self-harm. "Man, this is so freaky!"

"Mabel, we have to do something! I can't deal with this!"

"I'm on it bro-bro!" Mabel runs over to Dipper's bedside drawer, taking out the Journal. Bill narrows his eyes, being reminded of their possession over the book. Just as he was about to lunge for Mabel, she promptly pins him down to the floor once again with her foot. He squirms valiantly against her strength.

"Get - off - me!" Bill grunts in frustration, struggling under her surprising strength.

"Nope. Hey Dipper, get my glue gun, the rope, and the glitter! I'm going to try out that special knot I read in this magazine!"

The demon inhabiting the human body, widens his eyes when he hears this. That definitely doesn't sound good!

The next thing Bill knew, he is writhing on the floor, bound by his hands and feet with glittery pink rope, like some type of animal.

"OH, COME ON!" He yells, as Shooting Star and her ghostly twin brother flip through the journal, muttering to each other in secret, eyeing Bill with anger. "You guys are gonna regret this!" He growls, cackling internally how he is going to plague the twins with neverending nightmares once he breaks free of his bond with Pine Tree's soul. They ignore his threats, as they pack for their adventure to solve this inconvenient problem. Trying another tactic, Bill tries to appeal Shooting Star's compassion. Writhing in his tied up hands and feet, Bill tries to make his best puppy eyes - which is difficult, considering it's been a long time since he used a human face to make such a pitiful expression.

"I'm going to die of starvation! I'm telling ya!"

"I left you a bag of chips and grape juice on my bed. Plus there's a coloring book!" Mabel yells at Bill, before she slams the door shut and locks it.

Glaring at the door, Bill mutters, "How am I supposed to color or eat anything if - MY HANDS AND FEET ARE TIED UP LIKE SOME SORTA ANIMAL!" He explodes into rage, his body making a weird, flopping motion on the floor. Disgruntled, Bill eyes Shooting Star's bed. True to her word, he sees a face down bag of 'chips' (whatever they are) and a box of crayons with a 'My Little Sparkly Dragon' coloring book. Suddenly feeling the weight of human necessities, Bill is conscious of how parched his throat is and the grumbling of his human body's stomach.

"Stupid human body needing to stupid eat and drink." Bill mumbles, flopping on the floor helplessly. He tries breaking the tightly knotted rope, but to no avail. Pine Tree's noodle arms and legs are simply not strong enough. Bill groans at this hindrance. For a good three minutes, Bill struggles to sit upwards. Once getting into a good position, Bill twists his head around the Twins' bedroom, scouring the whole place for anything useful. His eyes light up when he sees scissors on the bedside drawer of Shooting Star.

He cackles maniacally outloud, as he awkwardly and slowly butt-scooches his way over to the drawer. Reaching his destination, Bill shakingly rises to his feet. Although his feet and hands are tightly bound together to prevent him from walking or using his hands, he can still stand. Staring down at the scissors, Bill abruptly bangs his body against the drawer. He does this repeatedly, despite the numbing pain creeping up Bill's lower body, until the scissors fall over the edge.

Grinning triumphantly, Bill falls to his knees beside the scissors. Now, to cut open the rope - how in the world can this work? Bill clenches his fingers - oh that's right fin-gers. Those parts of the human body aren't tied together. Realizing his chance of escape, Bill scooches closer to the sharp object. He manages to lean backwards and grasp the scissors in his fingers. He sits there for a good ten minutes, navigating the scissors through the bundle of rope, surprisingly not cutting himself in the tedious process. Then, the rope wrapped around his wrists fall to the floor. Bill lets out a huge whoop of victory, grabbing the scissors, and set to work on the rope around his ankles.

Once that is over with, Bill is free! Nothing can stop him now! All he just has to do is get out of the room, track down the twins, steal the journal, and - hold on a moment, A LOCKED DOOR?!

"Impossible!" Bill cries out, stomping his foot in rage.

He stares down at the locked door, his new enemy. "Wait, what am I talking about," He says outloud, slapping his head in disbelief at his sudden stupidity. Maybe spending too much time in a human body would lessen his intelligence… "It's totally possible!" Bill grins wickedly, trying to crack his knuckles similarly to what Shooting Star did. He fails at this gesture, only succeeding in squeezing his hands awkwardly. Bill ignores this failed attempt, sizing up the locked door.

"Behold, Door," Bill announces loudly with an air of superiority. "I shall now defeat you with my superior mind powers!" Taking a huge step back, Bill stared at the door as hard as he could with the upmost concentration. He stared at the door so hard, in fact, that his eyes began bulging and sweat forming on his forehead from the difficult concentration of his 'superior mind powers.' "...MMMMMmmmmmMMM!" Bill moans, his eyes rolling to the back of his head, as he collapses on the ground from exhaustion from his 'superior mind powers.'

"Okay…" He pants, fanning his sweaty skin. "Maybe my mind powers don't work in this scrawny human body. But that's okay. I shall now defeat this LOCKED DOOR - with my superior physical strength!" Bill once again, takes a huge step back, wiping his feet on the floor with preperation. "Door - here - I - COME!" He whoops out, hurdling Pine Tree's skinny human body towards the door at full force.

SLAM!

"GAH!" Bill cries out in pain, getting knocked backwards from the force he charged against the door. He ends up smacking facedown on the floor, the wind practically knocked out of him. The whole world is spinning, pain buzzing all over. "Haha...ha...wow this is so...ouch...funny." Bill groans, sitting up, rubbing his sore back. Maybe pain isn't so hilarious as I thought. He thinks sourly, starting to feel the consequences of mortality. "I see how it is!" He says aloud, glaring at the taunting, locked wooden door.

Grabbing the doorknob, Bill jiggles it violently, pounding on the wooden, spilntery surface. "Grant me access out of here - DOOR!"

The door, as expected, does not say anything in reply. This increases Bill impending anger.

This is simply ridiculous. The great dream demon, Bill Cipher, stuck inside a sweltering, unconditioned bedroom, because of a LOCKED. DOOR. He, Bill Cipher, was the one that solved the Sphinx's riddle FIRST before that stupid Greek mortal took his credit. He was the one that invented the idea of codes and the one that solved ALL of the man made ones! He is the dream demon, MASTER of the mindscape! Yet he is trapped inside a room because of DAMNED LOCKED DOOR.

"Injustice!" Bill screeches, kicking the door repeatedly. This certainly doesn't help him, because he only succeeded in making his toes sore with pain. "Harrumph!" Bill grunts, staring down at the door. Maybe something else can defeat this worthy new opponent?

"Open Sesame!" He exclaims. He waits for something to happen. Nothing.

"Release the puma!"

"Abracadabra!"

"Password!"

"Freebies?"

"LET ME THROUGH!"

The door says nothing, only continuing to be locked.

"You know what? This door is a JERK. Curse you DOOR!" Bill raises his fists at it, with a twisted, angered expression. "From this day forward, I swear vengeance! I shall hunt down your kind, and murder them into extinction! I swear upon my trendy bow tie!" Bill shrieks, stomping his foot repeatedly in such a childish like manner that it is pretty much hilarious. "I rue the day that you were born locked door," Bill seethes before turning his attention to the bag of chips and grape juice awaiting on Shooting Star's bed.

"Until then, I will eat my snacks, color the book, and then unlock you INTO SUBMISSION!" Bill swears to himself and the locked door, before he makes his way to the awaiting human food.

A/N: Oh my god, I had too much fun writing this. From the summary, this was originally meant to have Bill discover Doritos in chapter one, but it turned into THIS. If anyone gets the heavy reference that influenced this chapter, I'll fulfill a request for that person for Bill to Versus 'Insert Object Here'! Can anyone guess what Bill will discover next chapter (which is pretty freaking obvious). Reviews are much appreciated!