*wipes dust from computer screen* I'm back and this is crazy! After 4 years I thought I would never write again, but here it is. An angsty one-shot (but could be turned into a multi chapter fic) starring my favorite Twilight characters Jacob and Leah. As usual I own nothing and thanks to the author S.M. for letting me borrow her characters. Read it and leave a review telling me if you want more or how you felt. Looking forward to writing more and hearing from you guys.
"How did I end up like this?" Leah wondered to herself as she looked into the ocean. She was perched on the edge of the cliff, looking over the shores of La Push. It was quiet and peaceful, it was nice compared to the constant drama that was her life. Blinking back the tears that stung at her eyes she desperately tried to focus her attention on someone else…something else, but she just couldn't. His name was burned into her mind like a pattern. Jacob. Jacob. Jacob. Jacob.
They were getting closer. She could feel the ground vibrating from their strong paws hitting the woodland floor. They never wanted to be around her before so why was the pack rushing to her side now. "My pack." Leah scoffed and rolled her eyes in irritation. What a joke. All the pack ever talks about is being connected. The bullshit Sam preaches about brotherhood never really applies to her anyways...she's not a dude. And when have her so called brothers of her ever really cared for her anyways? She was a mistake and they made sure she knew it every in return she made sure everyone of her brothers knew how miserable she was.
Most days she could control her thoughts and hide them in the deep parts of her mind where they couldn't see. She usually ran patrol and tried to keep quiet it, but it was so hard. In her mind buried away were the reminders of what she lost. Forever doomed to the life of a wolf at the age of 18. All of her hopes and dreams vanished as she erupted into a ball of fur, fulfilling the destiny of her tribe.
After stumbling upon Jacob and his precious leech lovers she knew she had to get away. The sight of her Jacob with that girl was too much to handle . So she did what she knew best and ran. She knew she had been sitting on that cliff ledge for hours and she knew her time alone was limited. She could hear them coming now, growling and clawing their way up the mountain side.
Leaning back on her hands she focused hard enough where she could still remember what it was like before. She could remember a time before all of the vampire drama and the pressure of imprinting. She feel of the wool from her dad's flannel rubbing against her arms. She could feel her long hair whipping around her face and the warmth of the bonfire as she danced along with Rachel and her family. The happiness she felt after finding out she got accepted into school. But there in the privacy of her mind she could also remember the darkness. The screams from her mother when she saw her father lying on the floor clutching at his heart. The sound of the snip of the scissors cutting off her hair. The sound of her heartbreaking to pieces when she walked in on Sam and Emily embraced in a kiss. And worst of all she could still feel him…touching her body and whispering sweet promises of love in her ear.
"NO!" Leah screamed as she stood when she realized what she was doing, "No more." The tears were pouring down her face as the memories resurfaced. She kept them locked away for a reason. Locked away she couldn't be broken again.
Hearing the snap of a twig behind her Leah froze. She didn't have to turn around to know who it was. He was the fastest in the pack after her. She knew he would come for her first.
"Go away." She whispered softly not bothering to turn around. She tried to wipe the tears from her face to hold onto what was left of her dignity…no one would get the satisfaction of watching Leah Clearwater's heart break for the third time.
"I said GO!" She screamed after not hearing any retreating footsteps. Why can't she just be left to suffer alone. Glancing down she saw her knees stained with blood from falling while she scrambled up the hill. Something was wrong with her. She could feel it in her bones that she wasn't healing right. Those cuts of her legs should have already healed up by now. She could only focus on how heavy her body felt and the unpleasant taste in her mouth...like she swallowed sand. Was she bitten? Was she dying? It was all a blur after running from the Cullen house.
I will fight for you. I will fight for us. I don't need an imprint to tell me who to love. The memories were coming back stronger now. She fell to her knees at the sensation agitating the cuts deeper. Leah clutched at her head desperate for some kind of release, she moaned in pain at the assault.
"Leah, please." Jacob whispered starting to move towards her, but stopped when he saw her moving back towards the end of the cliff. "Get away from the edge." he begged her.
"Lays." he tried again, "Sweetheart please don't do this. It's not what it looked like." Behind him Jacob heard the rest of the pack and The Cullen family arriving. Startled gasps filled the air as they saw Leah on the floor.
Leah started to sob harder at his confession. Please don't do this. This as he called it was all she knew. The moment she saw him wrapped up in the now adult arms of Renesemee Cullen she knew her fate. She could tell he was slipping away and turning to her, his true imprint. Leah's heart gave a painful jolt at the word, reminding her what her place was. When Jacob Black imprinted on Renesemee the last bit of hope Leah clung to disappeared. She foolishly let herself get lost in his promises of forever and love.
"I won't let it take me Lee." He promised her one night, holding onto her tightly. "I love you. I don't want this imprint I only want you. Believe me." At his confession she looked up into those brown eyes and knew she was a goner. He could always make anything sound so passionate. He had a way of making you feel safe. At his declaration of love she dove headfirst giving Jacob Black the last little pieces of her heart. "I love you too." she whispered back giving him all she had left, "I love you."
Suddenly she wasn't in Jacobs arms she was alone of the forest ground. The pain slapping her back into reality as she felt the stones and sticks dig a little deeper into her arms and legs. "Please help me." Leah whimpered. The pain was suffocating her now. As she glanced up directly into Jacob's eyes she quickly looked behind him. She couldn't bring herself to make eye contact with him. There was the pack staring at her wide eyed and confused. Strangely enough she saw the Cullen's standing there, all giving her looks of pity and sorrow. The blonde vampire was bent over from waves of grief hitting him and Rosalie's eyes shimmered with tears she could no longer drop. She saw Edward's mouth moving whispering something to Carlisle, but he moved so fast and she was so weak all she could make out was system failing. So it was true. She wasn't healing…she was dying.
"I can't any more. It hurts make it stop." Leah sobbed out still pulling at her hair and clutching her chest, desperate for some kind of release. She didn't care who saw her at this point, she just wanted it to end. Carlisle made a movement to go towards her, but Jacobs strong arm pushed him back. It was only him and her right now.
"Tell me what to do baby." Jacob whispered edging his way towards her and falling before her,"Tell me what to do to fix it. Tell me Lays and I'll do it." Ignoring the shocked gasp from Bella and the sharp intake from Renesemee, he took her head into his hands and made her eyes focus on his.
"What can I do to make it right?" he asked her wiping the tears from her face and pressing his forehead to hers.
"Kill me." Leah pleaded to latching onto him. She knew this was the last time she would get to touch him like this so she took advantage running her hands over his chest and clutching on to his biceps. "If you love me you'll do this for me. If you care for me at all you'll do this for me."
"Leah!" Jacob breathed out in shock forcing his head back so he could look at her properly, "I can't do that."
Angry, Leah ripped her hands from his arms and stepped away from him towards the edge. She screamed throwing her hands in the air. "You can't or you won't Jacob! How can you deny me this when I gave you everything. I had. EVERYTHING and you won't do this for me." She sobbed finally letting go of all her anger. "I've loved you Jacob through all of this. Through Bella breaking your heart, through Sam and the pack, through the battles and I thought it was enough. I thought loving you would be enough to make it okay, to make the pain go away, but it's not. I can't love you while you love her. I won't stand by and watch you love someone else."
Leah teetered dangerously close to the edge. She was up high enough on the cliff that she may not survive the fall. "If you won't do this for me… I will." She promised Jacob stepping even further off the rock. Little pebbles slipped from her shoe and she watched them disappear into the water. It was a long way to the bottom, she never jumped this high before.
"No! Leah!" Seth yelled from behind them trying to break free of the hold Embry had on him. "You don't give up. Clearwater's don't give up… we fight."
Leah looked back at Seth's cry and she was conflicted. She would miss him and he would mourn her, but he would move on. They all would, Seth would find comfort in his imprints arms and forget all about her. He would forget all about his bitter broken sister and have a normal life.
"I love you Leah! You know I do!" Jacob cried reaching out to her. "I'm trying. I'm fight-"
"I know…" she sighed cutting him off and accepting what was about to happen, "But it's not enough."
Suddenly the air shifted and she fell back. The last sight she saw was her Jacob reaching for her screaming her name and Edwards cry of, "Grab her, but it was too late. Slipping from the edge she let go of the baggage and the pain that was embedded in her soul. All at once she felt a rush of fear, but it was only for a second and then she felt peace. She was free. She was happy. Closing her eyes she the wind whipped her hair around and it felt just like she was back at first beach. Surrounded by her family and drunk off of Jacob Black's love. She was transported to a time where nothing could hurt her and she smiled even in the face of death.
Leah Clearwater was strong, but even the strongest can't survive a broken heart...let alone three.
There it is! I hope you enjoyed reading it. Let me know how you liked it.