Hi guys. This is depressing. I just like sad, depressing things better than I like happy. Yes there is self harm, suicide, death and cursing in this. Names are not used also, I just liked it for this fandom for some odd reason.

Summary: Cursing/Suicide/Selfharm. Yeah. One-shot. Its very occ but I like it. Hopefully you do too

Disclaimer: I don't own Austin&Ally

He left me. It was just a dumb highschool relationship I tell myself. It wasn't like any other relationship though, because we weren't dating. He was my bestfriend and he left because I was too much of a struggle for him. If I'm too much of a struggle for him then who can handle me?

I get up from bed, my bare feet hitting the cold wooden floor as I walk out of my room and towards the kitchen. Its gonna be okay I continue to tell myself. How many fake smiles should I have to put up anyways?

I grab the pill bottle, completely full. Only to be completely emptied a few minutes later. As I stumble back into my room I sit on the floor. I know what I just did and I'm happy about it.

The feelings been going on for awhile now. He's gone. My other friends have left. Who wants to be friends with the girl who never smiles? The one whos never happy. "Its gonna get better" I hear everyone else's voices in my head. It isn't though. Where do you go when theres no where left? Back to where you started? If that's the case I'd rather be in my posistion then in that one. My wrists show the struggle, my body its self shows the pain. It feels like its been hours since I took the pills when it's truly been a couple of minutes. How much time do I have left? Who knows. Does it matter? Not really, my last words will probably be sorry and then again no ones listening so who gives a shit? My fingers start to tingle as I feel the pills kicking in. I laugh to myself at the sadistic thoughts of self harm. How long till it changes you completely? Till you never remember and you turn into the shell of a once happy child?

I lazily grab a picture of him and I from the floor. I had been crying over it last night and dropped it once I had fallen asleep. It still layed there. A lost memory. I trace the edges of the photo with my fingers. If only they knew. If he knew. No one cared though. At all. Its not like their lifes had fallen apart and then everyone they loved or cared about left them in the blink of an eye. The picture of his face, along side mine made my heart hurt, or it could be the pills. Doesn't matter though. I can feel my body start to sweat and my vision gets blurry. It's like I'm dehydrated and theres no water in sight. I take a couple deep breathes as I prepare myself for whats come. My destiny. I knew I was never going to make it far. Everyone at first thinks, I can do it. Then reality hits and they realize it would never happen. As I close my eyes I think of the last time we were together, he hit my arm playfully as I turned around and walked to my last class. To think that would be the end of the strongest friendship I had. At first I didn't think it would affect me the way it has. I thought I'd get over it but I guess it was the last straw instead. All I needed was the push to go far past my breaking point.

I might be overdramtic but this has happened for the better. No one wants to be alone but I am. Not for long, I'm not sure where I'm going. Heaven? Hell? Who knows. Actually who cares?

My breaths are getting shorter and I can feel my body giving in to the worn out, tired feeling that's come. I'm still thinking of him. Its always been him, always been about him and always for him. He never knew how much I really cared. Its my fault for never saying anything though he would have left anyways.

As I take my final breaths I think of my parents. How are they going to find me? Will they know or just asume that I'm asleep? It's gonna hurt them so much. Too late now. I suck in air for the last time, as everything goes black.

Tell me what you think? Do you like happy stories or sad better? LET MEH KNOW.

Bye sexy.