You know, I'm sure there's a law against falling in love with a magical creature. It'd probably be considered as gross as falling in love with your dog and having sex with it on your carpet, but really, hear me out: what if the animal weren't a mammal at all? That's even less of a compelling argument. I'll start over.
My name is Charlie Weasley (almost rhymes, doesn't it?) and I'm in love with a wyvern. It's not the kind of love that you imagine having with a girl or a boy, or any genders on the plane, but the kind of love that makes you want to set yourself on fire. Literally.
Just, yeah, babe, breathe fire all over me. Set my hair on fire; I don't care. That's hot.
I've never been particularly attracted to people. They just didn't interest me as much as outdoors. At first, when Hermione informed me of asexuality (long story), I thought that would be accurate. But is there a sexuality or an umbrella term that covers romantic feelings towards a dragon?
Now, look. This dragon is a completely maternal figure. She protects her eggs with a ferocity I've only ever seen in a mad woman. Which I find extremely attractive. The curve of her eyelid is almost seductive, really.
I told my dragon partner about this. Thought he'd get it, since he works with dragons too. He's shipping me off to a therapist at Saint Mungos, actually. That disappoints me a bit, especially since I was always under the impression that he was a very accepting guy. Well, I'll talk to you soon. Just need to say goodbye and begin the healing process of getting over this devastating crush.