Gray couldn't help but laugh at his friend Natsu's joke, shouldering his backpack as he and the pinkette continued to walk down the town's empty street. Above, the clouds turned from their bright white to a light gray color; signifying rain would be coming soon if they got any darker. "Yeah, she's pretty damn scary when you piss her off. But give her strawberry cake and she'll give you one of the most painful hugs you'll ever feel!"
"Jeez, I didn't think Erza could be so scary," Gray quietly chuckled. Up ahead, the fork in the road where they would say goodbye and go their separate ways slowly approached. Gray wished he and Natsu lived farther away, that way he could hang with the pinkette longer. They may be rivals, but he stilled cared for the guy. After all, Natsu was pretty much the only friend he had besides Lyon, Ultear, Elfman, and Mira. And all of them weren't even living in town anymore.
Finally, they came to the for. Natsu would go left, Gray would go right. Turning to the pinkette, Gray gave a smile, though it was a little strained. "I guess I'll you tomorrow, flame brain."
"Whatever. Back at ya, droopy eyes." Going their separate ways, Gray's smile fell and he cast his eyes to the ground. He slowed his pace and gave a quiet sigh. He didn't want to go home. He never did. All that awaited him was yelling and fighting. A drop of rain hit his nose just as he reached his driveway. Already he could hear the shouting voices of his foster mother and father. Gripping his bag's strap tightly, he forced himself to walk up the stairs to his front door and entered the house.
"Dad, I'm home!" He heard his dad say hello back from his office upstairs as he threw his bag onto the sofa. Immediately, his cat Happy came running into the living room; meowing softly as it rubbed against his legs in a welcoming manner. "Hey, Happy. Glad to see you too!" He knelt down and pet the blue – yes, blue; he dyed the white cat's fur to make it awesome – cat's back. It arched, and loud purrs filled the air. Natsu couldn't help but let out a quiet chuckle.
Once he'd given more than enough love and attention, he reached over for his bag and emptied its contents out to start on his homework. He reached for his notebook when he noticed something small and rectangular sitting on it. A cell phone. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his, making him frown. If his phone was in his pocket, then who's…?
Gray's. The dark haired teen had given it to him to show him a video and they'd been so busy discussing it after watching it that Natsu had accidentally thrown the phone into his bag when the bell rang. "I should return this, he might need it tonight," he mused. Happy agreed with a meow. He looked out the window and noticed it had started to drizzle outside. Grabbing the umbrella by the front door, Natsu said, "I have to return Gray's phone, I'll be right back!"
"Be safe," was the reply he got from his dad. With that, he opened his umbrella and exited the house.
"Let's see… I know he lives on this street, but which house?" He knew only three people lived on the same street as Gray, but he didn't want to go up to a house, ask for Gray, and find out it's the wrong house. Luckily for him, he knew what car Gray's parents owned. A grayish-brown Toyota Echo. He searched for the car and found it parked in front of a two-story house similar to his own. He smirked victoriously to himself as he made his way towards the stairs of the front door. But as he grew closer, his smirk began to fall when the sound angry shouting reached his ears.
"I don't care about that! What I want to know is why all the money is gone already!"
"And for the last time, I had to pay the bills! Gray! I thought I told you to put this away!"
"Our bills aren't that much! So tell me the truth: Where's. our. money?!"
"How many times do I have to fucking repeat myself? It went–" The sound of something glass shattering interrupted the argument."
"Goddammit, Gray! That was my favorite vase!"
"I'm sorry," the teen quietly apologized.
"Just clean it up. I can't believe it… I had that vase for twenty years! No, never mind. Move, I'll clean it up."
"I-It's fine. I can get it–"
"I said move!"
"Okay. …I'm sorr–"
"Yeah, I know you're sorry. I'm sorry too," the voice bitterly replied.
"You don't have to bite his head off, it's just a vase."
"Oh, like you don't bite his head off when he breaks one of your mugs? Don't patronize me when you do the exact same thing." He heard the sound of glass being swept up. "And you still didn't answer my question."
An exasperated sigh reached his ears. "I told you it went to bills and other miscellaneous things. Like toilet paper, napkins, shampoo, and all that. Gray, don't just stand there. Go do your homework."
"I don't have any toda–"
"Then go to your room!"
Natsu turned on his heels and quickly walked away from the house and back towards his own street. He was speechless. Did Gray have to deal with that everyday? Or had he simply walked to the house at a bad time? Now that he thought about it, Gray never talked about his life at home. He never talked about his foster parents or any activities they do together.
And the way he smiled every time he had to go home, Natsu knew that the smile was always strained. He simply thought it was because he didn't want to say goodbye. No, the real reason was he simply didn't want to go home. Natsu hadn't missed how Gray had sounded when he responded to his mother and father either. His voice had sounded so quiet, so dull and nearly void of all emotions. No, Gray was used to the yelling and fighting.
He remembered seeing Gray once or twice outside of school with his parents. His eyes were glued to the ground, his hands stuck in his jacket's pockets, and earbuds plugged into his ears. He had heard a few songs on Gray's ipod. They weren't exactly 'happy' songs. He'd just thought the teen liked the sound of hard rock and grunge music.
He looked back at the house he'd just left with a slightly worried expression. He'd check up on Gray tomorrow when he'd return the phone. Until then, he silently hoped, for Gray's sake, that his parents would stop arguing and quickly make up.
Gray blasted the music on his headphones, not caring that it was a little louder than his ears liked. As long as it drowned out the yelling from downstairs, he didn't care. He closed his eyes and lost himself in the music.
I don't want to change the world, I just want to leave it colder
Light the fuse and burn it all, take the path that leads to nowhere
All is lost again but I'm not giving in
I will not bow, I will not break
I will shut the world away
I will not fall, I will not fade
I will take your breath away
Watch the end through dying eyes, now the dark is taking over
Show me where forever dies–
He hit the skip button by accident as he reached for his ipod, giving a small curse under his breath. He heard P!nk's song Family Portrait come on, and he instantly skipped the song. It was too personal too listen to sometimes. He skipped several more songs, hearing the argument downstairs and noticed it was escalating. He knew pretty soon that he might hear a glass break or a door slam. Finally, he found a song he was in the mood for, and the sounds of the argument faded away under the sound of drums and a guitar.
Every time we lie awake, after every hit we take
Every feeling that I get, but I haven't missed you yet
Every roommate kept awake, by every sigh and scream we make
All the feelings that I get, but I still don't miss you yet
Only when I stop to think about it
I hate everything about you, why do I love you?
I hate everything about you, why do I love you?
He heard a glass shatter above the sound of the music and he pulled his headphones off for a moment to make sure neither of his parents were getting physical. It'd happened several times before, usually ending with either the police being called or a very pissed off mother with a hand that hurt from hitting the countertop in the kitchen. He still heard yelling, but it wasn't as bad as it was. Good. He put the headphones back on.
–out you, why do I love you?
You hate everything about me, why do you love me?
I hate, you hate, I hate, you love me
I hate everything about you, why do I love you?
Another song came on, one that he felt explained him perfectly, and he waited for his favorite part. When it came on, he sang aloud with it.
Watash no koto wo iitai naraba
Kotoba ni suru no nara "rokudenashi"
Translation? If I wanted to tell you what kind of person I am, the hurtful words I'd use would be "good for nothing".
Saturday rolled around and for once Natsu wasn't his happy, bouncing self. His thoughts still lingered on Gray and his family, and how he was going to have to face the teen later on. During breakfast, Igneel peeked over the top of his newspaper to see his son picking at his scrambled eggs. "You okay, Natsu?"
"'m fine," Natsu mumbled back. "Didn't get a lot of sleep last night." Igneel knew that was a lie – he knew the difference between a tired Natsu and a bothered Natsu – but didn't push the subject. Glancing at his watch, Igneel folded up the newspaper and took off his reading glasses; setting both items neatly on the table for later.
"Time for me to go to work." He walked over to the other side of the table and kissed the top of Natsu's head. "Try not to think about it so hard. Just do what you think is right," he whispered into his son's ear before heading for the door. "I'll be back at seven. Love you."
"Love you too, dad." He picked once more at his eggs and gave a sigh, setting the fork down. His dad was right, there was no point in fretting over it. Happy, who sat on the table cleaning himself, stopped and stared at his owner. Natsu noticed his cat staring gave a little glare. "What are you looking at?" The cat seemed to roll his eyes and went back to cleaning himself.
The clock read 10:42 when Natsu heard the knock at his front door. Raising an eyebrow, he raised himself from the couch and dropped the blanket that'd been keeping him warm. Outside the rain was coming down in sheets and he hadn't heard a car pull up in his driveway. 'Who the heck is crazy enough to be walking in this kind of weather?' Opening the front door, he was surprised to see Gray standing under the roof without an umbrella. His jacket was already soaked through, making the hood useless as his hair was already wet. Natsu stared for a moment before coming back to his senses. "Hey, Gray. You wanna come in? It's kinda cold out and you're all wet. I can get you a tow–"
"You were at my house yesterday, weren't you." Natsu gulped and nodded. "I saw your umbrella through the front window."
"I wanted to return your phone. I forgot I still had it until I came home and emptied out my bag." He reached into his pocked and pulled out the small rectangular device.
"Thank you."
"No problem."
"I'm…I'm sorry you had to hear that yesterday," Gray mumbled, looking off to the side.
"It's fine," Natsu answered. He didn't fail to notice how dark the skin under Gray's eyes were, nor did he fail to miss the rather dull and pained look in those dark eyes. He wondered how the other teen managed to keep such emotions hidden during school for the past nine months. "Just do what you think is right." His dad's words echoed in his mind. What he thought was right…?
Gray suddenly found himself being hugged tightly by the pinkette. He furrowed his brows in confusion. "Natsu?"
"I'm here for you, you know," the pinkette answered. "I'm here if you ever need me." The words settled in and Gray knew what he meant. "You're not alone." Gray could feel his eyes begin to water, and he blinked harshly in an attempt to stop any tears from falling. He would not cry, he would not cry. Not in front of his rival. "It's okay to cry, I won't let the world see your tears."
And Gray lost it. He buried his face in Natsu's shoulder, hugging the pinkette back with all the strength he had. His muffled sobs were nearly drowned out by the pouring rain. Natsu rubbed small circles on the other teen's back. He ignored the fact that Gray's soaked jacket was making his clothes wet, and that he was getting cold from the wind and the rain. He felt Gray's body shake from his sobs, could feel the male's hands dig into his back as he hugged like his life depended on it. "It's okay," he whispered gently into the male's ear. "Everything's gonna be okay. I promise."
And for the first time in over ten years, Gray believed in those words.
Everything's gonna be okay. I promise.
Wanted to write something short and sad-ish. Wrote a little bit of myself in Gray. Sorry if the argument sounded eh-ish. Now for those of you who don't have YouTube and don't know the song Care, heres the first forty seconds to the song as mentioned in the story:
Day by day my life gets colder, my ice grows thin as I get older
Peace in pieces, bloody and bruised
I feel so helpless and confused
'Cause I hear screaming on the left, yelling on the right
I'm sitting in the middle trying to live my life
This song was inspired by own feelings and by the song Wonderful by Everclear. Or, more precisely by these parts of the song:
I close my eyes when I get too sad, I think thoughts that I know are bad
Close my eyes and I count to ten, hope it's over when I open them
I wish I could count to ten and make everything wonderful again
I hope my mom and I hope my dad will figure out why they get so mad
Hear them scream, I hear them fight, they say bad words that make me wanna cry
Close my eyes when I go to bed at night and dream of angels who'll make me smile
I go to school and I run and play, I tell the kids it's all okay
I laugh a lot so my friends won't know, when the bell brings I just don't want to go home
Go to my room and I close my eyes, I make believe I have a new life
I don't believe you when you say everything will be wonderful again
Promises mean everything when you're little and the world is so big
I just don't understand how you can smile with all those tears in your eyes
Some days I hate everything
Everyone and everything
Songs mentioned: I Will Not Bow by Breaking Benjamin, I Hate Everything About You by Three Days Grace, Family Portrait by P!nk, Care by Kid Rock, Bad Apple by Touhou. I do not own any of these songs. Review please!
»roo the ice elemental psycho«