Like most days in our little slice of Washington, it was rainy. It was grey and hazy. Today, however, was only made worse by the miserably similar attitudes Seth and I shared. For some reason, he and I were both sure that something bad was going to happen between Leah and Ryan. That alone only made me feel worse. If Seth and I were thinking this without each other's input, it seemed all the more likely to be true.
Seth had been around Ryan enough to see that Ryan and Leah were a terrible match and made it a point to gripe on constantly about it to me any chance he got. With Sue Clearwater compelled to see past that fact for her daughter, and Charlie keeping the peace at least until after he and Sue's wedding, no one else would listen to Seth. It drove me nuts for so long. I hated everything about Leah and she me. As for Ryan, well, you had to wonder where he escaped from. Willing to date the bitter angst-filled Leah? He had to have lost his mind. I had noticed that Leah was even more black-hearted now that she was with Ryan though and that was probably what worried Seth the most.
what had brought us to sitting in the woods outside Seth's house was Seth's need to see his sister when she came back from talking to Ryan. I could have been with my Nessie already, but I knew Seth would never really let me go. In a way, I almost had a morbid satisfaction for the major fuck up Leah had made of herself. Pregnant? It wasn't like Leah to do something like that without a commitment or something like that. But there we were, bored and, in Seth's case, worried as we waited for Leah to come home.
When she came into our sight, she was running full speed, full speed for human form, her long black coat and equally long dark hair wafting behind her. Her eyes were hard, but she looked furious and determined. Seth took off after Leah as she passed, calling her name. She didn't even look back at him, never a break in her stride. Seth looked back at me, pleading in his eyes.
"Stop her!" He demanded, "You're the fastest!" I took a deep breath and darted off after Leah. Even in human form, she was fast. as a girl, she was automatically more capable of running with agility, but my human form was still faster. All I had to do was catch up with her and grab her arm or something. Just stop her so she could talk to her brother.
It really confused me when I realized she was heading for the cliffs. The cliffs weren't her normal spot to brood, but then the kid might be screwing with her a bit. As we got to the cliffs, I slowed, assuming she'd do the same. You know what they say about pregnant women though. She ran on, full speed and all. The wind was strong and wild up on the cliffs as I pushed faster, realizing her intention. I caught her arm only a few steps from her eminent doom. She struggled, demanding I let go, but I held fast.
"don't do this, Leah. It isn't worth it." I told her, hoping I could come off Alpha in human form. Apparently I couldn't. She glared up at me, never ceasing her struggle to keep running.
"What does it matter to you if I died now? I don't think anyone would care. I think you'd rather enjoy it, actually." There was no crying, only a furious resentment in her voice. I didn't think there was a time when she wasn't glaring daggers at me.
"I never said I was saving you to keep you around, Leah. It really wouldn't matter to me what you chose to do at this point. I'd be happy if you shut the hell up every once and a while. I'm doing this for the cub." Shit! I already had a pet name for it? This was bad. But, she was my Beta, and if she was going to have this kid, it was going to be a part of the pack, regardless. She froze for a moment, then continued her violent struggle.
"It's not your responsibility, Jacob. Drop it." She spat my name with a voice full of venom.
"I don't care what you do, Leah, but this cub didn't turn against everyone who loved it, this cub didn't sleep with Ryan for the momentary relief from it's own personal hell, this cub isn't trying to throw itself off the cliff!" I yelled the last part, thoroughly furious with Leah's blatant attempt to give up. if she was my Beta, she had to be stronger.
She stopped hr struggle and let out a scream of anguish. She threw her shoulder at me, all of her force behind it, in an attempt to let out her fury. I caught her from behind by her upper arms and pinned them to her sides. Her movement now restricted, she fell to her knees and cried. I kept a hold on her shoulders for fear that she might try to attack again.
She was on her knees, back curled inward, sobbing uncontrollably for a couple of minutes until Seth raced up. He took in the scene on the cliff and walked over to wrap an arm around his sister. He pulled her to her feet and turned back to me. grabbing my shoulder, he thanked me and began to lead Leah home. I stayed on the cliff, watching the black water churn hungrily, angry that I'd taken it's victim away. It seemed angry that Leah had got away. I sat down at the edge, my feet hanging, tempting the already agitated water far below. at first all I could think was, 'The ocean hates me. It's like a beautiful flower with a poison that could kill anything it wanted for food.' The cliffs were the soft petals of it's facade, luring in any distraught person, and the waters were the venom, ready to consume and destroy. I had stolen it's prey twice already.
Then I realized, my hatred for this ocean, it's methods, and it's natural capability to use them, felt too much like resenting Nessie. Nessie was my venomous flower and I was sure that in some way or another, she'd be the death or me. Her, or her watery twin.